Anything Else?
by LoveToTheCucumber
Summary: Iruka Umino, a cashier at the local supermarket, is tired of what he pictures to be a meaningless life. While drowning in self-pity, the only thing that seems to keep his head above water is his twisted obsession with a certain returning customer. Will this person be the one to show Iruka how to come to terms with his past? *AU*
1. Chapter 1

"**Anything Else?"**

**Chapter 1**

"You're doing it again," a voice I could recognize almost too easily said from behind me.

"Huh?" I turned around to look at my superior who did not look very pleased. I had been in this situation more times than I could count on two hands. It was not like I was doing it on purpose, but my boss always acted like I was consciously playing with his patience.

"How many times do I have to repeat myself? If you keep this up, I'll fire you without hesitation!" he talked pretty loud, not that he did not usually do that, and he tried to appear as intimidating and nonchalant as possible – probably just because he knew that the other employees were listening and he wanted to display his authority. He was just using me to set an example.

"I'm sorry, it won't happen again," I tried not to sound as if I did not care if it happened again or not, but it was hard, since the only reason I was there was because I needed the money so I could pay my rent and get food on the table every now and then so I would not starve to death.

"It better not. Now get your ass behind the desk, people are tired of waiting!" apparently, I had been daydreaming while being called to the desk over the speakers – again. _  
><em>

He walked away without as much as deigning to look at me one last time. I understood why he had to be so rough with everyone, he took every opportunity that he got to yell at somebody and show them their place in the hierarchy. If he was not rough, they would just stop respecting him and eventually stop listening to him. Someone in his position needed respect from everyone under him or else things just would not work out the way they should. I sighed loudly as I made my way down to the 2nd checkout lane, wondering how much time there was left until I would have my freedom returned.

All the people in line glared at me as I finally sat down behind the desk. No one appeared to be the slightest bit happy that I had come to open another checkout, they only seemed to focus on the fact that I had not showed up immediately after being called. Always looking at the negative side of everything. Typical. Just typical. But I was used to that, since I was working at a supermarket. All shop assistants were practically fed with negativity from the beginning of their very first day at work. People did not seem to care if they were rude or not towards us, we were there to serve them. Shop assistant, I hated that word more than anything in the world. It was so slightingly.

It took my colleague and me around half an hour to get through the long line that had piled up because of my ignorance. It was not so bad, though, when you were used to it. All the superficial glances and sullen looking faces, not to mention the way they spoke without variation. My job was to overlook all of those things, put on a smile and wish them a nice day. That was not too much to ask for, was it? I did not think so, at least not for 618 yen pr. hour. Yeah, being paid minimum wage was not exactly something to write home about, but I needed every single yen I could get my hands on and if that meant I had to smile to someone, who looked like he was tired of his life and had devoted himself to make everybody else think the same way of their own lives, I would do it.

"Have a nice day!" I said, faking the happy tone in my voice, not even looking up at the leaving customer neither the next one I was about to service. I cursed my life soundlessly as I grabbed one grocery after another, yanking them over the barcode scanner.

"How much?" asked the customer opposite me. I looked up and saw someone I serviced at least twice a week. Mondays and Thursday mostly, but also at weekends, though that was mostly to buy booze and cigarettes, and some times other weekdays if some special groceries were needed. Today was Thursday, the day I also beeped in an one and a half liter bottle of diet coke and an extra pack of cigarettes, besides the usual groceries, for this particularly customer.

"That would be 7.723 yen, please," I glanced over at the groceries I had just registered as "bought" and quickly discovered that there was something in the heap I was not used to be selling to this customer at Thursdays. Cream of fish, that was bought on Mondays. Strange?

I looked up when the man stretched out his hand towards me to give me the money, "Here you go. Exactly 7.723 yen, you can count them if you don't trust me," he flashed a smile, at least that was what it looked like he was doing. I could only tell his expression from his closed eyes since the lower part of his face was always covered from the nose and down.

"I-I believe you," I stammered and threw the money into the cash register. I hated when I could not control my own voice, it was so embarrassing. He opened his dark grey eyes, but kept on smiling with them.

"Cool, thank you very much. Have a nice day," he opened the plastic bag he had bought and stuffed all the groceries inside of it.

"T-Thank you... Have a n-nice day," I was stunned by our conversation. We had never traded so many words on the same day as we did that day and we had known each other for a long time. Well, maybe _known_ was not the best word to describe our relation to each other. We did not really have any other relation than the supermarket. He was the customer and I was the shop assistant there was not anything else to it. But to me, he was not just a paying customer. He was so much more than that.

I followed him with my eyes as he walked out of the shop with one stuffed plastic bag in his right hand. It looked heavy, but he did not complain. I could not help but wonder why he had bought that extra plastic tray with cream of fish. Had he had someone over for dinner? Or was he perhaps going to? Maybe he had just been craving cream of fish that week and had eaten more of it than he usually did? It was hard to tell since everything else aside from that seemed normal. Another thing that had been especially abnormal about that day, had been the conversation between us. The mysterious man did not say much, normally. Most of the time, I had to force the words out of him by asking stupid things like, "Anything else" or "Is that all?" My stupidity and lack of creativity sometimes surprised me. No normal person would ask if the customer needed anything else if he was shopping in a supermarket. It was silly. But anyway, just hearing him say those three words, "No thank you," that was enough to satisfy me for at least the whole day out.

"EXCUSE ME!" a woman on the other side of the counter yelled, leaning over it so that she could shout her words right into my face. I shook my head with astonishment and looked up at her, then over at my tongue-tied colleague and then back at the woman once again. Had she been trying to get my attention for a while now? At least it that was what it look and sounded like by her face and the tone of her voice.

"I'm sorry, what?" I sent her a puzzled look, trying to figure out what the hell her problem was.

"Maybe you would like to do your job now that you're done daydreaming?" she sounded like I was getting on her last nerves. My guess was that she had three screaming kids waiting outside for her in a black family Volkswagen. She had probably just gotten off from work and now she had to go home and clean the house and make dinner before her husband got off too while she still had to manage all her chocolate covered children. What a life.

Coming up with stories like that about my customers' lives was the only thing that made it easier for me to keep smiling at their sour faces, "My apologies," I said, not meaning a word of it and I continued to do what I was supposed to, but the guy with the mask never left my mind.

**OoooOooOo**

**Hey everybody!**

**This is actually my first attempt ever at making a Naruto fic... Well, actually I've been working on something for a while now, but since I sense that it's going to be a longer story I decided to wait with publishing everything till it's completely ready. With this fic, though, I just felt like publishing it right away and I feel that I'll be able to find time to write new chapters every now and then like it should be done. Enough of that, back to the actual story.  
>I hope you liked the first chapter and please feel free to review so I can read your thoughts about. It doesn't matter if it's good or bad or if it is about the story itself, the structure of it, ideas for something that could happen later on or maybe something about the way I write, critique is always appreciated.<strong>

**By the way, if it bothers you that I only use contractions in direct speech, I'll have to apologize for that. English isn't my mother language and we aren't allowed to use contractions in class unless it is direct speech. So I'm just practicing, since I normally use all the normal contractions when writing something in English.**

**Well, I guess that's all for now. See ya' ^^**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

I woke up in my bed, though my eyes remained closed. It had been over a day since the last time I had seen the man with the mask. I knew he was not supposed to come again until Monday, but I wished that he would make one of his weekend visits. If he came on Friday nights or Saturdays, it was, as said, only to buy liquor and cigarettes and since I did not drink very often and I was not fond of cigaret smoking it was not exactly pleasurable for me to sell him that kind of stuff, but what could I do? He was a grown man and he could do whatever he wanted to do. When I came to think about it, I did not even know how old he was? I would guessed him to be around 25-28-years-old, but I could be wrong.

I finally opened my eyes and got out of bed. When I looked at the clock, which was standing beside my bed on a night stand, I realized how little time I had to get ready before I had to be at the supermarket. I rushed to the bathroom, took a quick bath, bruised my teeth and put on some clean working clothes. I would have used the clothes from the day before, but I had felt hot that day and now it stunk of sweat, heavily. The sweaty working clothes ended up in the laundry basket which contained a lot more clothes already since I had not had the time to wash any of it lately. Work had been keeping me busy. Working almost every day and night because I was the only one who took every shift I was offered while everybody else tried to get rid of their hours. I guessed somebody just did not need the money as badly as I did.

The whole day went by pretty fast and I was happy to finally be able to go home and sleep. I had been so tired that I had nearly fallen a sleep up against the broom after I had finished sweeping the floor. That Saturday had been so boring I would not even start on going into details with it, but somehow time still managed to feel like it passed by quickly. I had been the only one working that evening since there weren't many customers on a Saturday night. It was not until I was just about to lock the door something exciting finally happened.

"Please, don't close yet, I just need a few things!" I looked up and saw a man running towards the entrance. At first, I thought I would tell him that it was too late and that I had already counted the money in the register and taken away the money that was in it, besides the change, but then I realized who it was, "Please, please, please, I'll do it quick," he said, being almost out of breath when he reached the glass door.

I let him in without saying anything and I just barely looked at him, "Thanks, you're the man!" he said as he slipped inside. He was wearing his mask as always and his clothes did not look very different from the clothes he usually wore on the weekends. Except for that leather jacket with pyramid, silver studs all over it in different patterns. It looked very nice on him. It kinda gave him a harsh look, but in a good way.

I made sure to sit behind the desk when he returned with an armful of alcohol, "I could not find the cigarettes, did you pack them away already?" he asked quietly, though he sounded like he was in a rush as he placed the many bottles on the conveyer belt.

"No, they are still here," I pointed behind me and he looked up to discover what I was about to tell him, "They have just been removed. Too many kids stole them so they were put here so that we could administrate them."

"I see, that's smart. Kids shouldn't run around smoking anyway," he smiled with his eyes and he was so right. It was better for the kids, though, it was a bit funny to hear it from someone like him who smoked quiet a lot, "I would like the..." long red lark, "long red lark," I was right, he wanted the usual. I smiled at him and nodded. I turned around on my chair and was just about to take out one packet of larks, but then it hit me.

"I know this is silly, but I need to see some ID, please," this was my chance to get to see his ID. From this I would learn a hell of lot more than I knew already. All I had been able to do up until now was analyze the things he bought, which I had become pretty good at if you asked me, but now I would get his full name and age all at once. What a breakthrough!

"ID? Don't you think I'm a little too old for that," he said, but pulled out his wallet willingly anyway. He rummaged around in it for a couple of seconds before he made a triumphing sound in his throat and handed me his ID.

_Hatake Kakashi_, what an amazing name. I could only wish to have gotten a name as smart as his, but I was stuck with that lame name, Iruka. I knew that I did not have much time to look at the card so my eyes rushed down and found the year he was born. _1982_ – that made him 30-years-old. I did not need much time to work that out since I had been dealing with numbers everyday for a long time now. He was a little older than I had expected, but the difference between him and I were only five years and since I did not consider myself as an old person, I did not think of him as old either. I looked up at him again before he could get suspicious of my secret agenda and passed him the card over the desk.

"I'm sorry, it is just something that we have to check from now on."

"It's okay, I don't mind," his voice was so gentle and laid back. I knew it had been risky to ask him for his ID, but the plan had worked and he did not hate me for following my self-invented rule.

I grabbed a pack of red lark and waved it in front of the scanner till it said beep before I went on to all the booze.

"Anything else?" I asked just as I usually did, but this time I got a different answer.

"Uhm, yes..." Kakashi's eyes did not want to meet with mine and I could have sworn he was blushing when he said, "Condoms. I need a box of them as well," I tried my best not to look at him with widened eyes. That was the last thing I would have expected him to say. In a way, it made me feel uncomfortable and I was actually a bit disappointed in him. Not that I should not have expected that he was sleeping with people. I just did not need it to be confirmed, you know?

"Sure," I handed him the box he had nodded towards when he had asked for it, "Anything else?" he shook his head gently and smiled again, only this time he did not appear to be as comfortable as before.

"No, that was all. Thank you," he said and paid for everything cash and collected his things in record time, practically storming out the door while shouting, "Thank you very much, I owe you one!" I could not believe my own ears. Had Hatake Kakashi just said that he was in debt to me? I could not help but smile and I closed off the shop with the feeling of having successfully fulfilled the day.

I closed my eyes tightly and pictured my idol before my inner eye. He was a slim figure, but he clearly spent a lot of his spare time at the gym, unlike me. His silvery hair was always a big mess, both short and long strands pointing in all directions from his head, though, it did not make him appear as a lazy person. It was just his style. Even his way of dressing was very informal and relaxed. He wore either a black, plain t-shirt or a long-sleeved, body-hugging, cotton shirt along with either loose sweatpants or once in a while a pair of dark jeans. Not to forget about the mask. That was one of the only things that never changed about him.

I shut my eyes open when someone suddenly knocked on the door. I turned around to see who it was and my jaw dropped immediately. It was him.

Quickly, I opened the door to ask him what he wanted and he stepped inside the shop without a word.

"Ka-Kakashi-sama?" I stuttered and took a step back, "What are you doing here?"

"There was something I needed to ask you, Iruka-san," he whispered, walking closer to me. I got a little scared and backed a few steps back.

"W-what did you w-want to ask me? And how d-do you k-know my n-n-name?" he kept coming closer until he had me backed up against the wall. He was scaring me, but at the same time it felt kind of nice standing so close to him that I could almost feel his body heat.

"I've been keeping an eye on you too," Kakashi said, ignoring my question.

"T-too? What do y-you mean b-by that?" all the words constantly got stuck in my throat.

"I know you have been watching me and I know why," he placed his hands on the wall behind me beside my head, cutting off any possible escaping route. I turned my head to the side, feeling his breath against my cheek.

"I-I d-don't k-know w-what y-you a-are t-talking a-about," I had a bad habit; stuttering whenever I got nervous. But I had never taken it to a level as high as this. Every word was spoken with a stutter.

"You don't have to play dumb. I'll lead," he whispered into my ear and suddenly I felt a cold hand sliding under my shirt, slightly touching my bare stomach. The cold fingertips tickled my skin and I shivered, getting goosebumps. The sweat on my forehead began to trickle down my face, what was he doing? "You want this, why don't you just admit it? You find me attractive. Say it out loud," I had no idea what he was talking about and I wanted to get away. Run, Iruka, run – that was what my head told me to do, but I could not get away from his dominant position.

I moaned unwillingly when he grabbed my neck between his teeth. This was not right, it was_ not_ right!

"Surrender already," he said in a seductive way, placing one hand behind my neck and forcing my face closer to his. I stared into his demanding eyes, sinking the lump in my throat.

"Please don't," I squeaked and flinched.

"Shut up," it did not sound like he was going to back off, but leaned forward instead. He was just about to capture my lips with his when I closed my eyes. A few seconds went by without anything happening. I opened one eye just enough for me to peek out. He was gone? And something was different. I opened my eyes completely and sat up in my bed. When and how did I get here?

I looked around the room, nothing seemed unusual. Slowly, I laid back down, turning so that I lay on my right side. My eyes immediately locking to something that lay on the floor, all curled up. A tissue. I sighed loudly and tipped to the side so I could lie on my back again and stare up at the ceiling. It was just another daydream. I had been so lost in it that I did not even notice I had closed up the shop and gone home. Pathetic.

But what the hell was that dream all about? Why did I imagine Kakashi doing something like that to me? I saw him as something as close to perfect as possible so why was I trying to ruin my perfect picture of him? What was even more disturbing to me, was the thing on the floor. I did not remember not cleaning up after myself the last time I did it, so what was it doing there? When? Why? I shook my head in disgust. Something had to be seriously wrong with me. I was used to drifting away into my own thoughts and not remembering what I had been doing in the mean while. But this? What was this?

**oOooOooOo******

**This chapter got a little longer than the last one, which is a good thing, if you ask me. So hopefully you got more out of it^^  
>I would be nice if you would review and tell me your thoughts about this :)<br>I'll try to update soon.  
>See ya' :D!<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Things slowly began to go back to normal. Kakashi and I did not talk more than the usual, "Anything Else?" - "No, thank you," but it did not matter to me, as long as I got to watch him every Monday and Thursday + a few weekend days. My boss yelled at me almost everyday and I did not talk to any of my colleagues, so basically nothing had changed since the day I had Kakashi all to myself. I could only point out one thing that had changed and it was that Kakashi had begun to buy more cigarettes than he usually did. It was strange and I could not figure out why. My best bet was that he was having some sort of trouble in his personal life. I wanted to know what had caused his usage of the life threatening product to increase. I wanted to help him. Help him solve his problems. I wondered if he was alone throughout all the things he was going through. Did he have anybody to talk to? Judging by his groceries, he was living alone, but did that also mean he did not have any friends? No, it did not make any sense. I could not conclude that he did not have any friends by the fact that he was probably living alone. Still, I was afraid it was the case. Maybe I should...

"Iruka, get back to work! What the hell do you think you are doing?" an annoying voice interrupted my flow of thoughts and I was not happy about that.

"I'm sorry," I did not even try to make it sound genuine. Right now, I did not care about my boss's or my own problems. Kakashi could be in trouble and I had to figure out what was going on with him so that I could stop him from doing something stupid. Who knew? Maybe he was heartbroken? Or maybe he had debts that he could not pay back? Maybe he was even involved in illegal drug transportation and something had gone wrong and now he had the mafia on his back... Okay, the last thing was a little unrealistic. Kakashi would never have anything to do with drugs. The point was I did not know if he had a big or small problem and how serious it was. Maybe he even had more than one problem?

"Don't give me that attitude, you know I'll fire you if you don't do as I say. I'm starting to get sick and tired of you, Iruka. Now, go back to work," he did not even bother to yell at me and I could not blame him since it was not the first time today we had had _the_ talk. My currently passive aggressive boss did not say another word, but turned around and went back to whatever he was doing. I rolled my eyes at him before looking down at the wooden crate filled with different products. I was supposed to put all these new products in place, but it was boring and took a long time, because I had to put all the new ones in the back so that people would buy the oldest products first. This was a total drag, at least that was what my colleague, Shikamaru, would call it.

As long as I was doing this, I had to find something to think of so I would not bore myself to death. I could not think of Kakashi since he was a more like a distraction than a subject to kill time and that was not what I needed. I would never finish unpacking the products if I kept thinking about him so I decided to sing a little song – inside my head, of course. Singing a song turned out to be a pretty good time killer.

I finished my first box and went out in the back to get another. And that was how I spent my afternoon.

"Hit me, baby," a deep voice blurted out and I turned on my heels to see who was standing behind me. My eyes widened when I saw it was non other than Hatake Kakashi. I thought I knew that voice, but I could not imagine him saying anything like that. Especially not when his words were directed towards me.

"E-Excuse me?" I stammered partly because I was caught off guard by his comment and partly because it was him saying it. Heat was rushing to my cheeks and I tried my best to keep myself from blushing.

Kakashi's eyes smiled at me and he chuckled, "Hit me, baby – that's what the song you were humming is called, right?" I put on a puzzled look and he scratched the back of his neck and cocked his head a bit. Had I been humming? I figured I had been so lost in my own thoughts that I had been humming it out loud instead of keeping it in my head. How embarrassing!

"Well... I-I think that it's actually called "Baby One More Time" but yes, I guess it's that one," I could not stop myself from blushing anymore and I was sure it was pretty obvious to him.

"Oh..." he said and paused, taking a quick look around the shop like he was searching for something... or maybe someone? When his eyes fell back on me, he continued, "Actually, I came to ask for your boss. Do you know where I can find him?"

I did not understand why he needed to talk to my boss. What could be wrong? Did he have a complaint about some of the products? - or maybe some of the employees? Could it be me? Had he noticed that I always stared at him or that I stammered a lot when I was around him or maybe that I never did my job properly? Could it really be me?

"Ohm, I think he's on a break now so he'll be in the back," I pointed at the door that led to the back and his eyes followed my instructions.

"Thank you and I'm sorry for taking your time," he said and sounded genuinely sorry. He waved goodbye before he walked to the back. I did not move out of the spot, I just looked in the direction he had disappeared. First of all, it had been a pretty weird conversation and I was still embarrassed about the fact that he had caught me humming – _that_ song at that, I blushed all over again and guided my sight away from the way he had gone.

"Iruka-san to checkout 2," an almost mechanical voice was heard throughout the speakers, which hung around the entire supermarket. I sighed and looked down at all the products that was still left in the crate. I was never going to be done with this if I was constantly called to the checkout or the boss was feeling like putting me in my place... Or Kakashi asking for direction. Well, I did not mind that last thing, but still, I was never going to be finished with what I was currently doing. I left the crate without moving it away from the dairy department.

The people in line sent me annoyed looks even though I had not kept them waiting this time, but that was just the life of a cashier, I guess. I sat down behind the counter and began serving the people that did not see me as an equal but more like a servant. As always, there did not happen much while I was sitting there. At least not until about 15 minutes later.

"Good evening," I said to the next customer just like I had said it to all the others before him. I glanced up at the man and his behavior appeared a bit strange to me. He stood with his hands in his sweatshirt's front pocket, looking around like he was paranoid or something? I turned my head a bit to look down at the things he had put on the conveyer belt. A pack of gum that was the only thing. I directed my look towards the man once again and saw the wild and perplexed look in his eyes. That was when reality struck me like a lighting. My heart began to pump the blood faster around my system. I knew what was about to happen already.

"Everybody, get down!" he shouted so loud so that he was sure it could be heard throughout the entire store. He then pulled out a gun from the pocket of his pullover sweatshirt. I did not know what to do and decided to follow his orders as all the other customers and my colleagues had done, "Not you," he screamed impatiently and pointed the gun at me. I sat up again and tried to sink a lump that had formed in my throat. I began sweating heavily pretty fast and the salty sweat made its way down my forehead and into my eyes, slightly blinding me. I tried not to get distracted by the burning feeling in my eyes; I did not dare to wipe the sweat away with my hand because the man's eyes were fixed on me.

He threw a small bag as hard as he could into my chest and shook his gun in front of me, "Now, take all the money you've got and put it into the bag. I will not hesitate to shoot you," he growled, using his gun as a pointer. He sounded just like my boss, the only difference being that my boss never threatened to kill me if I did not do as he said. I did not answer him since I figured he did not care if he got one or not and instead began to put the money in the bag.

When I had emptied the cash register, he motioned for me to rise and get out of the small box I was sitting inside, "Go empty the next one," he stared at me as I got out of the half open box. He walked behind me and pressed the gun against my back. I jumped in shock and felt how the gun was forced further into my back, "Don't you dare try anything with me. Walk!" I did as I was told. He stopped in front of the next checkout and I walked behind it to enter the box. I then found my key and unlocked the cash register, immediately beginning to stuff the money into the bag.

I glanced up at him whenever I felt it was possible for me to look up without being seen by him. He was mainly concentrating on the customers on the floor, only taking a quick look back at me once in a while to check if I was really doing what he had demanded. Slowly, I directed one of my hands under the counter, terrified that he would notice it from the corner of his eye. When I had finally felt my way to the small red button, I pressed it. The police would arrive soon and there was a small chance that he would still be here as long as he intended to empty every register in the store.

I looked up at him through my eyelashes as I slowly began to remove my hand away from the button again. But then he turned to look straight at me, "What the hell is your hand doing down there!" it was not a real question, he knew what I had done. He lashed out at me and hit me right on the nose. While I was still affected by his clear shot, he stomped behind the box and opened the door, taking a step towards me before he grabbed me by the back of my neck and forced my head down till it hit the conveyer belt. He slammed it down so hard that I was convinced that I was going to be able to feel it tomorrow - that is if I was still alive.

It was a rather uncomfortable position to stand in. I stood stooping with one side of my head pressed against the adhesive rubber and a man standing behind me, laying a lot of pressure on my neck and with his hips pressing against my ass. It only made matters worse when I felt the gun connecting with my temple. I blinked a couple times, something was tickling me right under my nose. I looked down at the conveyer belt and saw blood. I prayed that my nose was not broken, when actually I should be praying for my life.

"You worthless piece of shit, you notified the cops, didn't you? You're gonna pay for that!" he pulled back the hammer and I heard it click when it went into place. That was when it really hit me; he wanted me dead and I was going to die there. I was about to die. To _die_. I wanted to plead for my life, but no words could escape my dry mouth.

"Sayounara," he buzzed under his breath. I could see him out of the corner of my eye and it seemed like he was about to place his finger on the trigger. I closed my eyes, tightly. But what I expected to happen did not happen. People always say that one's life will pass review when you are about to die, I could now invalidate that theory. All I was thinking about was the actual situation and how much it was going to hurt when the bullet fired through my brains. Would I even feel it?

"What the..?" suddenly, I could not feel the man behind me anymore and the pressure on my face, temple and neck was gone. I placed my hands on the conveyer belt and used the strength of my arms to push myself up so that I could turn a bit and look at what was going on behind me. To my surprise, I saw the robber struggling with a silver haired man over the gun. They both had their hands on it and was trying to wiggle it out of the other man's grip. The tallest of them wrapped one leg around his opponent's, causing him to lose his balance and fall on his back. The masked man was not spared, though, because the shorter man had such a firm grip around the gun that the other fell to the floor with him. The gun was fired and a window shattered only a second after the shot was heard.

I wanted to help, but when I tried to stand up straight, I felt dizzy. I placed a hand on my forehead to stop the room from spinning. I then felt something wet and sticky on my fingers and moved my hand in front of my eyes just to discover that I was bleeding from my head. That explained my dizziness. My legs began to wobble underneath me and I stretched my hand out to grab onto something, but I missed and collapsed on the floor. My eyesight reduced rapidly and my eyelids started to feel heavy. I opened and shut my eyes over and over again without moving any other part of my body. The two men were still romping about on the floor, it was not easy to tell who was going to subdue the other when the fight finally came to an end. My eyes flickered and I noticed that I was drooling all over the floor. I could not even control my own saliva, things did not look good for me. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I had blacked out.

**~o~**

When I finally regained consciousness, I was not lying in the checkout box anymore. I was in the back of the supermarket on a thin mattress on the floor. My head was throbbing, my mouth was dry and my body felt weak. I did not feel like sitting up or moving at all. A blanket would be fine, thanks, I thought to myself and tipped my head to the side to see what was going on around me, even though it felt like someone was beating me with a frying pan. The only ones in sight was my boss and a tall lean man, who, by the way, was wearing a mask, covering the lower part of his face.

They were standing right outside the door of the room I was lying in, talking. I needed to concentrate a lot in order to make out any of the words they were saying and I cursed the vain in my ear that was pumping blood like crazy, making it even harder for me to hear what they were talking about.

"Well, I guess I can't deny you it after what you have done," my boss did not sound like he was too happy about the words he spoke himself.

"I'm glad you decided otherwise," Kakashi said, curving his eyes up into a grateful smile. What were they talking about? What did I miss? My boss glanced over at me and discovered that I was awake. It actually seemed like he was relieved. It did not take long before Kakashi's eyes were on me as well.

"You know, I'm not paying you for just lying around," he tried to sound angry, but I knew he did not mean it like that even though he pretended to do so. He had always been a quirky fellow. I did not answer him because it did not feel like there was any need for it, "You have already been through a medical examination, but you probably don't remember that, at least that is what they said."

I nodded, carefully, and let my eyes glide slowly from one man to another. Kakashi did not say anything, he was just smiling down at me. I wanted to sent him one back, but I could not make my lips form into something that could ever look like anything near a smile. 

"You'll get a few paid days off including the rest of today. I'll drive you home in a minute, okay?" I nodded towards my boss and closed my eyes, I still felt a bit tired. The two men continued their conversation for a little while longer – I did not care to listen. I just wanted to sleep.

"Hey you," a calm and soft voice tried to get my attention so I opened my eyes and saw Kakashi standing in the doorway, "You might wanna put some ice on that," he smiled at me before turning to my boss. He thanked him and I did not know why Kakashi was thanking him, but he was. He then left without another word.

**oOooOooOo**

**So, this was the third chapter. I think there was a bit more action than the last two, but I don't know if you see that as a good thing. Anyway, I hope you liked it. Reviews are always appreciated :) **


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

The trip home had felt long. Very long. Neither my boss nor I said much during the short drive. He only told me what had happened after my "lights went out," as he had so thoughtfully put it – not. Apparently, Kakashi had gotten the gun away from the robber and laid him on his stomach and sat on his back, twisting his arms behind his back so that he would have to struggle a great deal to get out of the position Kakashi had put him in. The police of course took over when they arrived and Kakashi had gone to check on me. Oh, what I would not give to have been awake at that moment! When the robber was removed from the store, they had brought me to the back where I had a medical examination, which explained the bumpy plaster on my right eyebrow and why Kakashi had said what he said to me before walking away. I had gotten 7 stitches and my boss claimed that they could see all the way into my skull before they had closed up my flesh wound. No matter if he was telling the truth or not, it still hurt like hell and I was definitely going to need some painkillers of some sort.

When he had dropped me off, I entered my apartment and went to bed, immediately, not bothering to take off my clothes. Not even my shirt that was soaked in sweat. It was not until the day after the incident I got to see how screwed up my face had become. I was in shock after seeing my own reflection in the mirror, to say the least. My right eye was swollen, yellow and blue. I decided to close the damaged eye and keep it that way, since I could not see much with it anyway.

As I stood there, looking at myself in the mirror, I could not help but begin to study myself. I was not a very attractive man. Actually, I was kind of ugly. I had a highly visible scare across my face starting from around the middle of my check, going over the bridge of my nose and ending on the middle of my other cheek. My hair was a little too long and I was afraid to wear it down since it might have made me look like a girl. So I always wore it in a high ponytail, but with the hair gone from my face I looked a bit chubby. Also my eyes sat a little too close to each other and they were dark brown which gave me a kind of distant and silly look. They were empty. Or blank, yeah, blank was a better word for it. Last, but not least, I had gotten myself another scare. When the stitches came out, my eyebrow would be cut in half for the rest of my life and I would have another noticeable scare on my face. Great, just great. The swollen eye did not exactly boost my self esteem either. And when I came to think about it, there was not much I really liked about myself. Not my looks nor my personality. I was known to have a short fuse and I could be pretty cheeky if I did not care to hold it back. Maybe that all explained why I did not have a girl friend. A fugly, hot-headed low class nutcase, who would want someone like me when I did not even have money? I for sure would not want me. I would have to be rich just to get someone in my own league.

I looked down at myself with a sigh, pulling off my shirt that still had huge, dark spots by the armpits, back and chest. It smelled worse than anything I had ever let my nose near and it made me want to puke. Kami, could you be more disgusting than I was? I threw the blue shirt in the corner of the bathroom, taking a look down at my upper body once again before turning my attention to the mirror where I could get a better view of it.

"I'm hopeless, ain't I?" I asked myself, studying my flabby muscles. I was weaker than most men. There were probably a lot of women that were stronger than me too. Lifting my arms and trying to flex my non-existing muscles only made it worse. Nothing. I could only see loose skin and fat.

I turned my back towards the mirror and looked over my shoulder to see if I would have any luck finding something similar to muscles there. But I found nothing. I tried not to take it too hardly, but it was not easy. Defenseless, that was what I was. I could not even protect myself against that robber. I had to be rescued by someone else. And not just by _someone_. But Hatake Kakashi himself. I was so embarrassed that I did not even want to look at myself in the mirror for another second. Instead, I pulled down my pants and the rest that was covering my private parts, quickly connecting my ass with the cold toilet seat. My shit smelled worse than a carrion - even my insides were rotten. Oh, what a lovely body to be trapped inside.

I looked down at my feet and discovered that I was still wearing my shoes and socks and I figured it would be better if I just washed it all at once, so I kicked off the shoes of my feet and yanked the socks off as well, not forgetting about the pants and the tight boxers. I threw it all onto the shirt in the corner of the bathroom so that I had a pile of smelly clothes that had to be washed as soon as possible. I raised one arm and stuck my nose near the armpit, quickly sniffing it a few times. Yuk, my clothes was not the only thing that needed to be washed. But I could not take a bath as long as I was on the toilet, so I had to hold on just a little longer.

I bore my elbows into my thighs and rested my head in the palms of my hands, looking down at my feet.

"Good grief," once again a confrontation with my disfigured body had overwhelmed me. The toe next to my big toe was longer than it was supposed to be. It was a little longer than the big toe, but only on my left foot. Great, so my feet was repelling too and they did not even look a like. Could I get anymore asymmetric? I did not want to know if they smelled as well because they probably did and I would have been able to smell them if it was not because I was currently filling the bowl with stinky slurry.

I finished what I was doing and took a bath immediately after. When I had put on some clean clothes, which by the way was the last clean set I had left, I took all of my neglected laundry and put it in a bag. Someone needed to go to the laundromat and that someone was me.

After doing a couple of other things like brushing my teeth and such, I grabbed the bag with the laundry and walked down to the laundromat. But as I had noticed already, it was my "lucky" day and the laundromat I was used to go to was closed due to sickness. Fantastic, now I had to walk even longer, at least I knew where there lay another laundromat near by.

I found the other laundromat in less than ten minutes and fortunately it was not closed. There were a lot of free washers and I just picked the first thing handy. Washing all of my clothes would take some time, so I decided to go and sit by the window while I was waiting. Time went by a bit faster if I looked at other people. There were not many people out on the streets at this hour, though. It was only Tuesday and it was about 11 O'clock so most people were working, unlike me. I was supposed to work, but my accident had made my boss show some compassion for once, though I would rather be without it. I was not very good at sitting still – and this might sound a little weird to some of you, since I am always daydreaming and therefore not doing what I am supposed to, but that is not the point. I think of different things when I am not working. When working, I see a lot of people and I can just imagine how their lives could be like, in contrast, when I am alone, I always end up reflecting on my life or something like that. Not particularly my favorite thing in the world to do. Since my life sucked pretty badly.

I glanced out of the window, seeing someone I had not expected to see. Was he just popping up everywhere I went or was I unconsciously stalking him? No, it could not be that. It had to be a coincidence.

But something was wrong. Or maybe not wrong, but strange at the very least. Kakashi looked paranoid. He was constantly looking over his shoulders, twisting and turning, like he was making sure no one had followed him or was spying on him. What was he doing?

A man walked up to him and stopped beside him. They started talking as Kakashi pulled a bundle of money out of his jacket, handing them to the other suspicious guy. It looked like he was counting and approving the amount of money. He nodded and stuck his hand under his jacket and as Kakashi he pulled something out, but this was not money, but a thin package. He gave it to Kakashi, who hid it in a bag he had taken with him. When the package was safely placed inside the bag, he threw it over his shoulder, still holding onto it with one hand. What was this all about? He was not dealing... drugs... was he?

When the man had left, Kakashi directed his steps towards the laundromat I was sitting in. Quickly, out of embarrassment, I jumped away from the window and tried to find a place to hide. He was coming closer and closer with every second and I was having a hard time finding a good hideout. Before it was too late, I ran to the opposite end of the room and hid behind one of the washers.

Kakashi entered the laundromat and walked towards a washer near the back, purposefully. He was not standing far away from me when he let the shoulder strap of the bag slide down his big arm. He was what you could call muscular.

He opened the bag and pulled out some clothes, which he stuffed into the washer. After starting it, he turned around and leaned his back up against it, closing his eyes. I wondered what he was doing. Was it his way of killing time? Sleeping? Or was he thinking? If he was, then what was he thinking about? I would love to be inside his head and find out what he was thinking.

I realized how close he actually was to me and thought it would be better to put some distance between us. Still squatting, I began to sneak forward. I looked behind my shoulder to check if he was still standing with his eyes closed. Unfortunately for me, I did not notice the boxes of washing powder standing in front of me and I knocked right into them, the whole tower collapsing around me. I looked up when the last box had hit the ground. A few people were standing in their place, staring at me. The only one who had moved out of his place was of course Kakashi. He stood right beside me, looking down at me. I blushed.

"Hey, it's you!" he said and sent an eye-smile down at me.

"Y-Yes, it's me," I did not know what else to say. I was surprised when he suddenly stretched out his hand towards me.

"Here, let me help you," I only just raised my hand a bit before he grabbed it himself and dragged me up on my feet again, "So, how is the head?" he sounded so casual when asking. He squatted down and began to pick up the boxes and stack them the same way they were stacked before. For a short while, I did not do anything else than look down at him, until it hit me that I should probably get down there and help him clean up the mess I had made. Why was he even helping me?

"F-Fine... I guess?" I faltered out when I had squatted down beside him.

"That's good to hear, I was worried that he had hurt you badly," he was talking in a happy tone, but did not look at me. Was Hatake Kakashi worried about me? I felt slightly more comfortable around him than I usually did. Was it because of the change of setting or could it be all the things that had happened lately that maybe had brought us closer together? Maybe he just had that relaxing effect on people.

I had been distracted for some time so I had not noticed the pain in my head, but now I did, because he reminded me that I was hurt. Not wanting to lose face to him, I pretended like it did not hurt, "No, I'm perfectly fine," I tried not to stutter and it seemed like it was actually working for once.

When we had finished rebuilding the tower, we both stood up and straightened our clothes. He looked at me and sent me his signature smile.

"So, I didn't know that you did your laundry here?" of course he did not know, we did not even know each other. He was a lot better at this chit chatting thing than I was. I never understood why people had to ask so stupid questions. But I did not mind, as long as it was him asking. He listened when you spoke and sounded genuine whenever he said something, no matter what it was. I had never talked to someone like that.

"I usually do it at Sally's, but it was closed today."

"Really, how come?"

"Someone was sick or something. But I guess it doesn't matter when there's another laundromat right around the corner."

"Yeah. So, when are you going back to work?" he sure asked a lot of questions, but I managed to answer them without stuttering, even though I was not used to talking to him.

"Thursday, I think," I looked down at the floor and crossed my arms. Everything felt so cozy when Kakashi was there. His laid back attitude towards everything and his relaxed way of standing, it just made me feel comfortable. It was so strange. I was never like this when talking to people I did not know.

"Cool, then maybe I'll stop by and check on you," What did he say? Had he just said he would come and check on _me?_ "But I gotta go now, my clothes are clean. See ya'," he said and walked to the washer and took out everything and put it in his bag again. I had not even noticed that I had been there for so long that the washers were done. We had talked for much longer than I thought and when adding all the silent moments where we just stood beside each other and the time before he came, it actually made sense it was later than I first thought. I walked over to my washer and took out my clean clothes as well. They smelled delicious now.

I looked over my shoulder when the door of the laundromat was opened and a bell rung. It was Kakashi who was on his way out. He looked over at me and raised his hand and made a farewell gesture. I did the same and he smiled at me before exiting.

**oOooOooOo**

**Okay, I've been up all night to get this done! So please, don't hate me if I have made some stupid mistakes. I've already corrected the once I found myself and they were really stupid, but that is just what happens when you are tired and writing.. So it's nine in the morning and I think I better go to bed.. Well, hopefully you enjoyed his chapter and I hope to get some reviews with your thoughts of it :)**

**See ya' soon :D!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

I stood in front of the mirror, looking at my band aid covered eyebrow. It was time for it to be removed and I was wondering how to tackle it. Should I just rip it off quickly or should I do it slowly? If the stitches clung to the sticky side of the band aid it would probably hurt a great deal. I sighed and shook my head, I could not do much else than just try and take it off. I grabbed one end of the band aid and began to slowly peal it off my eyebrow.

"Ouch," I whispered through gritted teeth and tugged at the band aid again. The thread did not stick to the band aid, luckily, and I ripped the rest of it off in a split second. I put my hand over the spot I had just tortured to try and ease the pain. It made no difference, but it was worth the try.

"Only one hour left," I muttered, referring to my return to work. It was Thursday and I had no holidays left. If you asked me, I had been ready almost right after the incident to start working again, but my boss would not hear any of it. So he had a heart after all. I smiled at the thought of it and chuckled. He always tried to appear so tough when actually he was a very kind soul, he just did not want anybody to see it. Tenzou, he was indeed a funny guy.

I strolled into my bedroom to find my working clothes. It was a bit dusty in there and messy too. A few days of vacation and I had not even found the time to clean my apartment, what had I been doing all this time? Maybe I should not have spent so much time at the laundromat after all. Yes, I had gone there every single day after meeting Kakashi, but he never showed up again. It was kind of disappointing, but it was probably better that way. For some reason I had gotten the crazy idea that maybe we could become more than just customer and shop assistant. Was there a chance that we could become – dare I say it – friends? It was just my overactive imagination that was trying to play tricks on me. We could never be friends. He was so much better than me.

I pulled on my clothes and found the keys to my apartment. Quickly locking it and finally making my way down to the supermarket for the first time in what felt like forever. Getting back to work was going to be a relief. I would no longer have to stray around and wonder about things that was never going to happen.

I pulled out a pack of gum from my right-hand coat pocket. It was Stimorol gum with wild cherry flavor – my all time favorite. It tasted so sweet but in a way also sour. It was hard to explain, but it was good and it did not lose the flavor after just a couple of seconds like most other gums tended to do. I stuck the pack back into my pocket after throwing a piece into my mouth. "Mmm," it tasted like a little piece of heaven. I could not help but wonder what it would be like to kiss someone who had been chewing on this godly tasting gum. Well, I could only imagine since I did not have much luck with girls. The last girl I remembered asking out was an old colleague of mine. Her name was Yuhi Kurenai and she was a black haired young beauty around my age. But she did not want to have anything to do with me, because she was in love with our boss, Tenzou. Back then, I did not understand what she saw in him, but then I realized anyone would be a better catch than me and since he was the one closest by – and the owner of the supermarket – she chose him. But she never got him, since he did not want to date any of his employees, so she quit and I never saw her again after that. That was a couple of years ago and I had not pursued anyone in that way afterward. It was kind of pathetic and I was afraid that I might had forgotten how to do certain things, since I had not gotten to practice for years.

Well, that was a thing of the past and I should try to concentrate on here and now instead since it did not look like things had changed from back then anyway.

I entered the supermarket when there was around 10 min. till my shift started and I decided to go and announce my arrival. I found my boss in the back, which was where he spent most of his time doing paperwork and things like that. He looked up at me when I entered the room.

"Hey Iruka, good to see you again. How is your head?" He was in a particularly good mood today?

"It's fine. I'm happy that you gave me some time to recover, but I must admit it feels good to be back," he nodded towards a chair that stood opposite him and I took a seat. It looked like he wanted to tell me something. Was he going to tell me the reason why he was so happy today?

"That's good to hear," he paused and sent me a quick smile before continuing, "I have a special job for you starting today. Since you are the one who has been here the longest besides me, I want you to train somebody new," so that was why he was so happy. A new member of "the club" meant less work for him.

"Okay, who is it?" I asked, but I was not really interested in the conversation. I hated training people and it was always me that had to do it. It was such a pain.

"I don't remember his name, but he should be here any minute now."

"Okay, so should I begin my shift no..." I was cut off by someone who was knocking the door.

"Enter," Tenzou said, watching along with me as the door cracked open and a pale man stepped inside the room.

The man put on an uncomfortable smile and scratched the back of his neck, "I'm sorry that I'm late, but I had some trouble getting over here."

"That's okay, just don't make it a habit. Iruka here will tell you everything you need to know, right?" I was almost too stunned to answer. What was Kakashi doing here? Was he really the one I needed to train to become a shop assistant? Was this some kind of joke?

"Sure, I-I will," Tenzou excused himself and went out of the room. He was probably going to ask some of the others at work to go and open another checkout since I would not have time to sit there myself now that I had someone to train. But how could it be Kakashi? I still remembered the first time he came to the supermarket, clearly. He wore his mask as he usually did, but according to Tenzou he was not allowed to cover his face when he was inside the supermarket. If you were allowed to do something like that, it would be easier for robbers to disguise their faces before robbing the shop. He denied to take it off for some odd reason and when they tried to kick him out he said that he would not leave until he had gotten what he came for. That was when Tenzou lost all of his patience and called the cops. One officer showed up and he, Tenzou and Kakashi all went into a private room where they stayed for nearly half an hour. When they finally came out again, Kakashi walked right into the shop and bought what he needed. After that, his routine with coming every Monday and Thursday started. I never found out what happened that day, but I really wanted to know what had suddenly made Tenzou change his mind. First he was not allowed inside the shop when wearing a mask, then suddenly he was and now he was going to work here. I did not understand a thing.

Kakashi looked down at me and smiled with his eyes, "So, it's you who's going to be training me. Kinda funny when you think about it, huh?" yeah, it actually was kind of funny. The last time we had met here, he had saved me from being killed by some psychopath and now I was training him. It was almost like the roles had been reversed. You could almost call me his... superior?

"Well... Yeah?" I did not know what else to say and when I thought of the time I would have to spend with him from now on it kind of scared me, "Should we get started then?" the casual talk was just not my thing. This had come as such a surprised that I would rather just get started with working.

"Sure, what should I do first?" he asked and tried to look serious, but I could still see the smile on his face. It was kind of cute – if you could say that about another man?

"Why don't I start with showing you around the shop? You should know where everything is, okay?"

"Sounds logical."

We went out of the private area and into the shop where I began to show him around. He could remember where most of the things were pretty quickly and listened to everything I said, except for one time when an attractive woman crossed our way, but I did not say anything. I did not dare.

"When you have an empty crate, you'll have to put it over there," I pointed at a spot where there was already a lot of crates and he nodded understandingly.

"Uhm, excuse me?" Kakashi and I turned to see who it was that was trying to get our attention. It turned out to be a pretty, petite, young woman. The woman that Kakashi had already lost his concentration to once, "I need some cat food, but I can't reach it. Would one of you two help me, please?" I could see that Kakashi wanted to help her, but he was hesitating, probably because he did not know if it was okay with me. He looked down at me with a questioning look on his face.

"Sure, we can help you," I nodded approvingly to Kakashi and we walked with her to the department where all the pet stuff were. When we got there, I realized the cat food she wanted stood higher than I had expected it to, but it should not be a problem. I walked as close to the shelf as I could and stretched out my hand to grab a one of the bags, but I could not reach it. I looked over at Kakashi and the girl from the corner of my eye and they were staring at me and it looked like the woman was desperately trying to hold a laughter back. How embarrassing. Quickly, I got on my toes and tried to do it so that they would not notice, but I still could not reach.

"Let me," Kakashi said and went over right beside me, snatching the bag down from the shelf like it was no big deal. I saw the look on the woman's face. It was almost like she was looking at him like he was some kind of hero. When Kakashi gave her the bag of food, I was busy blushing. I had made a complete fool out of myself in front of Kakashi – and the girl, obviously, but I did not care what she thought of me, she was just a customer after all.

"Thank you," she said, looking at Kakashi and fluttering her eyelashes. He sent her a smile, but it was not the polite smile he usually gave people. People like me. It was the kind of smile you gave girls, whom you were interested in. I could not believe my own eyes. Was he flirting with her?

"Don't mention it," was his reply to her. Then something happened I had not seen coming. The girl pulled out a card and handed it to Kakashi.

"If you want to, you can always call me on that number," he looked down at it and then up at her again, the smile never leaving his face.

"Sure," this was kind of awkward and I felt like a third wheel. I tried not to give her a dissatisfied look, but how could I not when she was holding up the guy I was trying to train. How could she ask him out at a time like this? And why did she, he had not done anything to get her attention, had he? Maybe she knew about his heroic act and well, he was kinda attractive for a man whose face was half covered. But was that the only reason why she wanted to date him? What a shallow girl, I would never do anything like that. Kakashi deserved better!


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

That night I had a strange dream. I dreamt that I was running. Running behind Kakashi. He was walking only a few meters in front of me, but no matter how fast I ran, I could not reach him, not even when stretching out my hand to touch him. I called his name more than once, but he never noticed, just kept on walking. Running on the spot - that was all I could do.

Suddenly, I was in a whole other place. I stood in front of a naked tree – a naked apple tree, to be exact. It was flourishing right before my eyes and both green and red apples came to light. A man then appeared from behind the tree, but it was not just any man. It was me.

He then stepped closer to me and asked if I was hungry. My stomach rumbled. Yes, I was starving, but the hunger came so sudden. I was not hungry just a few seconds ago.

Without putting any further thoughts into it, I nodded to the familiar looking man. He put on a grin, which made me rather uncomfortable, and said that I could have one of his apples if I wanted to, the only price being that he had to watch me while I was eating it.

My stomach called for attention again and I accepted his offer.

"There's a catch, though," he leered and plucked one red and one green apple from the tree before continuing, "One of these apples will make you able to never have to eat again while the other one will kill you, slowly," the apples were lying in his palms that were held flat. I studied both apples and thought that maybe I would be able to figure out which one was the bad apple, but they were completely identical. Only the color of them were different.

"I'll take the red one," I said and took the red apple from his hand. The hunger was making me crazy and the apple looked so good that I took a bite without hesitating. It tasted delicious, much better than I had expected. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the tasty substance that rubbed against my taste buds.

"You can't always be lucky," the man who looked like me snickered and watched me eat.

What he said made no sense to me and I just sat down under the beautiful apple tree, happily wolfing down the juicy apple. When I was done with it, I threw the core over my shoulder. Then I heard a weird sound. I looked up and saw that the tree began to shake the leafs and apples off of its branches. I closed my eyes and covered my head with my arms so I would not get hit by one of the apples.

Everything went silent.

I looked up from my protective position. There were apples everywhere, but something was different now. All the green apples were still green, but the red apples were now red with black and yellow spots on it. The man in front of me laughed.

Then my stomach began to hurt.

I did not know what that dream was all about, but I remembered feeling frustrated when I woke up from it in the morning. While helping Kakashi out on his second day at work, I imagined the dream in my head over and over again, trying to figure out what my mind was trying to tell me, but I never found an answer.

"You want one?" My attention turned to Kakashi, who was holding out a cigarette in front of me.

"What?" I asked, not sure what had happened while I had been rummaging through my own head.

"I'm going on a smoking break and I was just asking you if you wanted to join me?" it looked like he did not mind repeating himself.

"Ohm," I looked around in confusion. Was he really asking me if I wanted to go and smoke with him? Was it not only friends that did that? I had a weird feeling in my gut, should I go or should I not? I mean, I had never had a smoke in my entire life and I hated the smell of the poisonous fumes. But how could I possibly pass up an opportunity like this? "Sure, I was on my way out anyway," I lied and walked outside with him.

He gave me a cigarette and handed me the lighter. I almost did not know what to do with it, but I was not a complete idiot and managed to stick the unhealthy, tobacco filled smoke into my mouth and light it up. When I took the first drag of it, I only kept the smoke in my mouth, not daring to inhale it. If I held it back long enough, then maybe he would not notice? I was wrong because when I was out of breath, he gave me a funny look when the smoke came out again. Okay, so he was able to see that I had not inhaled it, which meant I had to do it.

As Kakashi searched the pack for a cigarette for himself, I took a long drag and tried to inhale it. Already from the first second the smoke rolled over my tongue and down my throat, I felt it; the scratchy feeling in my throat was unbearable. I had never tried anything as uncomfortable as this.

I did my best to keep inhaling, but failed and had to cough it all up. If Kakashi could not see now that I was not used to smoking, then he had to be blind. It was so obvious that I had no clue of what I was doing and that my throat was a virgin when it came to this.

I felt like scratching my throat, but that was not going to be possible, of course. The only thing I could do was keep coughing, even though I did not do it purposely. My eyes began to fill with water and I had to bend forward and place my palms on my thighs, the cigarette pointing away from my body, because of the pain in my throat and now my stomach too.

"Ohm, are you okay?" Kakashi asked. Luckily, I did not have to see which kind of face he was making because the only thing I was able to see through my glossy eyes were his feet.

"Yes," I managed to say, but had to cough a few times more before I could continue, "I'm fine," my throat felt soar and my voice sounded hoarse. This had been a bad idea from the very beginning.

"Are you sure?" I was finally getting over my cough attack and stood up straight with difficulty.

"Sure," I coughed, "this happens quite often to me. I guess I smoke too much," liar, liar,_ liar_! What kind of idiot would believe that? What was I thinking?

"Oh, well that's a pain," Kakashi chuckled and turned his back towards me so that I could not see his face. That was when I realized something. He was going to take off his mask! But with his back turned against me I would not be able to see it.

I heard the wheel of the lighter being turned and fire crackling. His mask had to be off now, but he had turned around and I could not possibly get myself to step in front of him and look, could I? No, he had turned for a reason and I had to respect his wish of not being seen. After all, there had to be some logical explanation for it. If he was embarrassed about something, I was not going to make him even more embarrassed by looking at it. Instead, I turned my back against his back and leaned one of my shoulders up against the cold brick wall of the supermarket. Looking at it from the bright side, now I did not have to try and inhale anymore.

A silent atmosphere had swapped around us. I had been so happy when he had asked me to join him that I had not even wondered how it was going to be like. Maybe he wanted his companion to be silent? Or was he in fact waiting for me to say something? I did not dare and took a drag of the cigarette and blew the smoke out immediately. That poison was not going to touch my lungs ever again.

"So," I was surprised to hear him break the silence, "For how long have you been working here?" I wanted to look over my shoulder, but forced myself not to. It was definitely going to be weird to have a conversation when standing back to back.

"Since I was 15, so that's 10 years."

"10 years?" I did not even get to think one single thought before he had burst out like that, "Wow, that's a long time. Didn't you ever consider finding something else?" I racked my brain to try and remember if I had actually had any future dreams for myself sometime in the past.

I could only come up with one thing.

"I guess, but after graduating I didn't really feel like finding something else," he was right. 10 years was a long time to work at the same place. Especially if you had been 15 when you first started. I had had a dream for myself once, but I never really felt like leaving the village.

It was a pretty small village, not the smallest, but small. I had dreamt of going to Tokyo and become an auditor or something else that had to do with numbers. I did not like to credit myself, but I was actually pretty good in school and had gotten good grades and scored high on the various tests we had taken. One of my teachers told me to apply for a scholarship so that I would be able to pay for further education, but I never did, and the only reason why was because I was afraid I could not handle the pressure. So, I had ended up staying in the village and kept my old job, since it was one of the best paid jobs in town when you did not have a real education – even though it was minimum wage.

The conversation died out and the silence fell around us once again, but now it was even more uncomfortable than before because it seemed like both of us would actually rather talk then stay silent. So I asked him something, even though I did not like being the one of us to speak first.

"Why did you choose to work here?" I heard Kakashi moving behind me and I could not stop myself from glancing over my shoulder. He had squatted down.

"I didn't have a choice, really. When I moved to this village around one and a half year ago, I actually came here because of my job. But then I was fired just recently and I needed money to pay rent, so, you know the rest," he sounded so relaxed and carefree, but if I had to take a wild guess, his lack of concern around this subject was only a façade. Was this why he had begun smoking more than he usually did?

"Oh, okay," I answered and thought that in a way it was actually nice to just stand outside and talk with him.

"Well, I'm done," he said and stood beside me with his mask back on in no time. He threw the fag end away.

"Me too," I did the same thing with my cigarette, only difference was that I had not smoked the whole thing yet.

"So, what should we do next, Iruka-san?" my sight shot right up at him and I stared for a few seconds without saying anything.

"H-how do you know my name?" I did not remember telling him.

He chuckled, probably because of my reaction, and pointed at the left side of my chest, "Name badge," Kami, did I feel stupid now?

He winked at me before beginning to walk inside the shop with me following suit, "Besides, Tenzou has used your name before, don't you remember?" Now that he mentioned it, I did actually remember the boss using my name in his presence, but I never imagined that he would notice or remember, for that matter. I guess you can not always judge the book by its cover.

"I'm going to show you how the cash register works," I said, pretending like I had never asked him that other question.

**oOooOooOo**

**That's all for now - hopefully that was enough to satisfy you for a while^^**

**A huge thanks to the people that review this story, it is your fault that I would rather write another chapter than do my homework (shame on you!)  
>I also wanna thank all the other people who is reading this story and putting it on alert and on their list of favorites :D!..<br>I'll update again asap, though I have no clue when that will be, but hopefully before the week is over.. It actually just depends on when I'm done with my two assignments :)**

**Until then, see ya' all and please review – a review only makes the chapters come faster since they inspire me so much and make me so overwhelmingly happy!**

**Bye :D!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

I stood by the window, looking out at the park that was located not far from the supermarket. It was in the middle of the cherry blossom season so the Sakura trees were in full bloom. It was such a beautiful sight.

A young couple walked through the park hand in hand. The guy was saying something to the girl with a wide smile on his face. I had never been able to lip-read so I could not make out what he was saying, but no matter what he was talking about it was something that made the girl laugh and cling to his arm as they crossed paths with a bunch of teenagers that were sitting under the biggest cherry blossom in the middle of the park. Those children looked like trouble makers and I guess they actually were since most children around their age should be in class at that time.

One of the boys among the group of youngsters kind of reminded me of myself. He wore his presumably shoulder length hair in a high ponytail just like me. He was jumping around, making a fool out of himself while trying to impress the girls that were watching him. A real yob.

The boy jumped up in the air and grabbed onto one of the fragile branches of the sakura tree. He swung his body back and forth roughly and the flowers loosened. The wind was strong that day and caught the flowers immediately after they had let go of the branch they had been attached to. They flew in different directions, spreading themselves all around the park.

It looked like one of the girls were scolding at him, probably because he was ruining the beauty of the tree. She did not appear mad, though. Playful was more like it. He let go of the branch and landed on the ground with a huge smirk plastered to his face.

Sometimes I really appreciated the fact that the park lay so close to my work. Watching the various people visiting the park was a good way of killing time. It was one of the things I usually did whenever I was on a break or if I just needed to space out for a short while. It was no different that day, except that I had not spent my breaks this way lately because of a certain person.

Whenever I was going on a break – and even if I was not going on a break – Kakashi asked me if I wanted to go and grab a smoke with him. As you might have guessed already, I could not pass on his offer. Not one single time. There was a good and a bad side to this, though. The good thing was that I got to talk to him. We did not talk a lot or anything, but it was something at least. The bad thing was that I was afraid that the smoking habit was slowly growing onto me. I had not bought any cigarettes myself yet or smoked at home or alone. I only smoked with Kakashi whenever he offered it, but since he smoked quite a few times during our shifts, I too got to smoke a couple of cigarettes a day. I never intended to become addicted to it and I was starting to think that that was going to happen if I was not careful. I had begun to inhale properly half of the times I took a drag – that alone said something about the whole situation.

But right now, as said, I was doing what I usually did on my breaks. You want to know why? Because Kakashi was late... again. He had been late every single day since he started working here. I had tried to talk to him about it, but I did not like to sound too bossy, so I let Tenzou do most of the work, even though he rarely noticed Kakashi's absence. I did not know if Kakashi was aware of that fact and that he was just taking advantage of or if he was the kind of person who was always late. Regardless of his reasons, he was late today and even later than normally.

"Hey Iruka-san," when you speak of the devil he is sure to appear – just to use a cliché.

"Hey Kakashi-sama, y-you're particularly late today," I stated with a slight stammer as I turned to face him. His eyes were curled up in a smile as always.

"You know, you don't have to call me that. We have been working together for over a week now, you shouldn't address me so formally," he chuckled, avoiding to be held responsible for being late yet again.

"Oh, I'm sorry," an embarrassing silence fell upon us and we both avoided each others looks. These awkward moments appeared a bit too often if you asked me.

"So... Ohm," he started and scratched the back of his neck, "last day of training, right? What are we gonna do today?" Our eyes met again. He sent me a small smile and I did not like what I was about to say.

"Well, your last day of training was actually yesterday," I tried not to sound too disappointed and stuck both of my hands in my pockets to create a relaxed and cool look. I probably just ended up looking like an insecure schoolboy.

Kakashi gazed at me surprisingly and answered, "Really? Oh, I didn't know."

"Training only takes a week," I shrugged my shoulders as I walked past him, heading for the vegetable department to get back to what I was doing before my break had begun. To my astonishment, he followed right after me.

I figured it was better if I pretended not to notice, I did not want to appear thrilled about it or anything like that. If I wanted to be his friend and be seen as an equal, I had to get rid of my dog-like behavior. Let him come to me and not the other way around, right?

When we got to the vegetable department, I began checking through the apples to see if there were any bruised ones among the fresh supplies. At first, he just stood watching, but after I had looked over my shoulder and gotten eye contact with him, he spoke, "Iruka-san?" I had already turned back to the apples and simply replied him with a "Mmm?"

"I-I don't know what to do," he sounded pained by the fact that he had to ask for instructions now that he was actually done with the training.

"Kakashi-san to checkout 4," a man called over the speakers. I looked over my shoulder again and saw that Kakashi was looking up at the speaker like it was actually talking to him.

"I guess you do now," I chuckled slightly and he looked down from the speaker and back at me.

"I guess I do," he said with a small smile and walked to the checkout like he was asked to do. This was going to be weird. I did not have to train him anymore so he would be around, but we would probably not get the chance to talk anymore. I did not dare to start the conversation and why should he come and talk to me now that he did not have to any longer? If I still wanted to pursue my plan of becoming his friend, I would have to find another way to maintain the contact between us. But what could I do?

As said, me beginning the conversation was out of the question, which meant he had to talk to me first, logically. So, the next question was how I got him to talk to me. That was a though one. I could bump into him on his break on purpose and make it look like a coincidence? Or maybe... no, it was stupid. How the hell was I going to make him talk to me without me having to say something first? On the other hand, why should I not be able to talk to him as long as I kept the conversation on a professional level? Then I could hope for him to direct the conversation into a more casual direction, but would he do that? It sure was a better plan than trying to make him talk to me.

The next time he did not have anything to do, I could ask him to help me out with something that was a job that required two pair of hands. Then there was a bigger chance that we would begin talking casually like we had done during his training. Yeah, that was a good plan – so far.

Quickly, I finished sorting the bad apples from the good ones and began searching for something I could ask Kakashi to do with me. It was not easy, though. Most things could be done by only one man or else it was something that would not take more than a few seconds to do. I needed more time than that.

I looked around for about 4 minutes before I figured Tenzou would not be too pleased with me if he caught me hanging around doing nothing. Every time I was done with something, I took a couple of minutes to search for that four hand required task, but it was impossible and I was beginning to think that I might as well just give up. I had no idea of how I could get in contact with him. I could not ask him to go and grab a cigarette with me since I did not want to encourage him to smoke more than he did already and if I could avoid it, it would be better for me too. But then what?

I brushed the left sleeve of my uniform away from my watch so I could see how long there was till I got off. It had stopped.

"Damn it," I whispered to myself and flicked the glass of the watch a few times. Kami, I hated this watch. It always died out on me! Not that I had expected anything else when buying it. It was a pretty cheap watch, which I actually got even cheaper because of the discount I got for being an employee. Yep, I had bought my wristwatch at a freaking supermarket. That only underlined just how low a budget I had.

"It's 18:00," my head shot up and I looked right into the eyes of my silver haired colleague.

"What?" I asked confusedly.

He pointed at my watch and answered, "It's 18:00 o'clock. That's what you were wondering, right?"

"Thanks," was it because of my bewilderment over his constant sudden appearances or that he always spoke out of context that I never understood what he was talking about?

"I was going out for a smoke, wanna join?" he held out a cigarette in front of me, just like he always did when asking me. In the beginning, that was not the tempting thing about his offer. Back then, it was all about getting the chance to talk to him. But now? Now that cigarette had also become a small factor that had something to do with the outcome of his question.

"Sure," I said, not caring that I had already used my last break. Tenzou would not notice anyway and what he did not know, would not hurt him.

I had a strange sensation in my fingers when stretching them out to take the cigarette. They were tickling, like they were longing to hold onto that cigarette. When he gave it to me, the sensation disappeared an it felt like my fingers had found peace. This could not be a good sign.

My focus had been distracted for a moment, but when we went to the back, I finally began thinking clearly again. Kakashi had just asked me to join him for a smoke. And it had happened quiet often for the last week, sure, but it was different now. He did not have to ask me anymore. At least he should not feel like he had to. He had no reason to ask me. So was he actually asking me? Was it because he wanted me there? I could not help but feel kind of... honored? I know, it is pathetic, but that was how I felt.

We both lit our cigarettes and we were standing with our backs turned towards each other as always. I still had no idea why he would not show his face and I did not intend to ask him since it seemed to be a touchy subject to him.

I sometimes imagined how it would feel like to lean up against his strong back. Well, I did not actually know if it was strong, but it looked like it and I had seen him lifting different things and I must say, most of the things he could lift, I could not even lift a centimeter above the ground. Hell, he could even lift more than Tenzou could! And Tenzou was pretty strong, so that should speak for itself.

The smoke entered my lungs and began poisoning them, I did not even notice that I had inhaled until after it was too late. In a way, I did not even care anymore if I inhaled or not. It felt kind of good, after all.

"So, what are you doing tonight?" Kakashi suddenly asked out of the blue.

"Ohm, not much, I guess," it was embarrassing to admit that I did not have anything to do on a Friday night. I know, I had to ask him the same question in order to be polite, but truth to be told, I did not mind knowing what he was up to. I had wondered what he did on nights like these. Sure, I knew he loved to party, at least I think that was what all the booze was for? But where did he go, who did he go with and what did they do?

"I'm going out with a couple of my friends. Nothing out of the ordinary, but I'm sure that it's going to be a blast," he chuckled quietly. I racked my brain to find an appropriate answer, but what were you supposed to say to something like that?

"Cool, sounds like fun," I chuckled along, but it did not sound as sincere as I intended to do.

We did not really speak after that, mainly concentrated on our cigarettes, which was sort of nice, actually. The silence was not as tense as it used to be.

When it sounded like he had dropped the fag on the ground and was putting it out with his shoe, I took a last drag before getting rid of my fag as well. He was still faster than me at smoking a cigarette and I did not want to stand out there alone so I always put mine out right after him no matter how far I had gotten with it.

He walked up beside me and his mask was already back on, just as it usually was when he finally decided to show his front to me again.

He was smiling at me, for some unknown reason and I did not know where to look or if I should say anything so I just looked over his shoulder and waited for him to say something.

"One of my friends are holding the preparty," he started and I looked at him confusedly. Why was he even telling me this. Were he trying to brag or something? Was this just another one of his incoherent outbursts? I had completely misunderstood him and I was not prepared for what he was about to say, "If you give me your number, I can text you when we're heading for the club. That is of course only if you want to join?" The smile never left his eyes and he stared right into my overwhelmed eyes that clearly reflected just how much he had caught me off guard.

Was Hatake Kakashi asking me... out?

**oOooOooOo**

**I hope the length of this chapter made up just the tiniest bit for the huge delay. **

**I'm sorry it took me so long and I promise to do my best to prevent this from happening again. I have an excuse, though – this was published so late because I had no idea how to get to the next point of the story and I had actually already written a whole chapter, which I ended up deleting since it sucked so badly. So, there you have it. I know, it's a bad excuse. I'll just shut up and get on with the story. Sorry!**

**So, will Iruka accept Kakashi's offer? Or will his lack of confidence get in his way :o?... **

**I guess you won't know until I decide to reveal it for you ;D lol, hahaa xD! **

**Well, I guess that's it for now. Thank you to everyone who is reading this! Please review and I see you all again next time :D!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Blinding lights in any thinkable color danced over the floor, passing numerous sweating people with a body temperature so high that they alone heated up the entire room. Whenever the lights hit someone, it created a severe sparkle from the spangled clothes and the sweat dripping from their reddish faces and skin. It also smelled kind of funny in there, but that did not come as a surprise to me.

I turned around myself in order to get a brief over the situation while carefully avoiding to bump into the jumping beasts surrounding me. How the hell did I end up in this crowd of people, which you could easily compare to a mosh pit at a rock concert. People were pushing and shoving for no reason, it was not like they were trying to get in the front row to touch the DJ or anything. Kami, how I hated being around a bunch of drunk idiots like these. For some odd reason, the harder you pushed, the wilder a party you got. I remembered that much from back when I had been one of those. But now that I was not intoxicated and had gotten older, I really did not get why I had once found it just as entertaining as they did.

A girl, which I guessed to be a few years younger than me, screamed directly into my left ear and for a second I was afraid that she had actually split my eardrum. She even managed to drown out the distractingly loud music. Not that I hated loud music, but this was incredibly loud and moreover, it was SM with Rihanna, that was playing at that moment, which was definitely not one of my favorites.

I tried to send the girl an annoyed look, but she was busy with jumping in step with the music, screaming along the lyrics at the top of her lungs. It did not sound particularly good. A sick mooing cow would not be a bad comparison.

Suddenly, a pair of unknown arms tried to swing around my neck, but I ducked and squeezed my way out of the huffing and puffing crowd. A hug from one of those disgusting people was the last thing I wanted!

It finally looked like I had escaped the wilderness and found a spot where someone did not try to knock me over every single second. I straightened my clothes and checked if the brutes had spilled any alcohol or anything else on my new and clean jacket. It was grey and made out of cotton so any stain would be very noticeable and practically impossible to get off, at least for me.

I looked down at myself and wondered if I looked okay in those clothes. Besides from the open jacket, I wore a pale gray and black striped t-shirt and a pair of ordinary washed out dark jeans. I had added a white belt just because I thought belts were a great accessory and fit almost any outfit. My shoes were white as well since I needed something to match the belt so it would not stand out too much from the rest of my clothes. I do not know how to describe them, though. I guess you could call them kind of hip hop style? They look big and the laces are not tied to o and they are tugged underneath the wide tongue of the shoe so the knot is hidden.

I did not know if this was what you were supposed to wear at a club these days or if the pieces and colors fit or if it even looked good on me. I was not much of a stylist, but I tried, since I did not want to look like an idiot in front of Kakashi. I wanted it to look like I knew what I was doing, but it should not look like I had been considering what to wear either. I did not want to appear gay or metro sexual, or whatever the correct term for someone like that was.

I put my hand in front of my face and breathed into it so that I could tell if my breath smelled. It did not appear to do so and I gave a small approving nod to myself and walked on.

"_C u at RAW in 30?" _that was what he had written around 40 minutes ago. The message was so cryptic and I was not sure if I had ever read anything with such difficulty before. I was not a complete moron, I knew people wrote like that now a days, but seriously? I could barely decrypt it! And Kakashi was 30-years-old, was he not a bit too old for that? Not that he was old or anything! I just thought that only teens wrote like that.

If I understood his message correctly, I was supposed to meet up with him at the club called RAW around 30 past midnight. I came there on time, but I had used nearly 10 minutes just to look for him. He was nowhere to be seen. He could be late, which was kind of expected of him, but then what was I supposed to do until he decided to show up? I could buy a drink or dance, but I did not really feel like doing any of those things. Drinking alcohol only brought back bad memories. Memories that I did not have any intention of reflecting over tonight. They were not going to ruin my shot at coming closer to Kakashi.

I knew I would look pathetic and miserable if I just sat down at my own table, but I did not have any other choice, did I?

Slowly, I made my way to the sitting area where I found big empty table. Kakashi had not told me how many friends he was going to bring to the club along with him so to make sure that there was room enough for all the potential incomers, I had chosen the biggest table of the free ones at the club. Most people had left their seats to go dancing instead when the popular song "Moves Like Jagger" had started playing so it was not that hard to find a table. Unfortunately for me, the biggest, empty table was the one surrounded by three neighbor tables that were stuffed with drunk men and women. Now they would have something to talk about, I thought to myself as I sat down at the table anyway.

The situation made me feel very small and weak. The men at the neighbor table were pretty buff in contrast to the petite woman on their laps and side. I figured it was for the best if I kept a low profile. I did not want to get in a fight with any of those and since I knew what a sharp tongue I had, I would probably not be able to hold back if any of those brainless guys tried to act cool towards me.

One of my arms lay flat and bended in front of me and I placed the other right beside my hand with the elbow on the table so I could rest my cheek in my palm. This was boring.

I scanned the room to see if there was anything interesting to look at. The first thing that caught my eye were two women that stood by the bar with two contemporary men. It looked like they were trying to seduce them, but it was probably just to get free drinks since those women were way out off those men's league.

I continued my search, but did not find anything of interest. A couple were on their way out to the girls bathroom, you could easily guess what they were about to do judging by the girl's slutty behavior and the horny look in the guys expression. There were dancing people, snuggling couples, drinking drunks and two guidos that were about to get into a fight, but probably would not, since the bouncer had already noticed them.

With a idly exhale, my eyes wandered to one of the corners of the club. I only saw what you could expect – a suspicious man who was receiving money from another man who looked kind of needy. Do I need to say the words?

So far, nothing had changed from back in the days where I used to go this club frequently. The only thing that had changed the slightest was the music. Besides that, everything was just the same old shit.

My attention turned to one of the tables beside me when one of the women burst into a loud laughter. She was sitting on a man's lap with crossed legs thrown to the side. Her upper body was twisted so that she could face him and rest her arms on his shoulders. I could not hear what they were saying to each other because of the loud music and all the other people around them that spoke at once.

"Hey you!" I looked up through my eye lashes, without raising my head, at a man who was standing right in front of me. He did not look very pleased, "Yeah, I'm talking to you. Piss off, will ya'? You're taking up an entire table!" he was rude and sounded angry, but I did not care, I was here before him. I was not going to give up my table for a jerk like him.

"I'm waiting for someone. Go find another table, this one is taken," I looked away from him and did not exit my relaxed position that should signal to him that I did not care what he wanted.

He started laughing, "Yeah, right. Like anybody would want to hang out with you. Now scoot!"

I did not deign to look at him nor did I reply him. I did not move out of the spot and he started gnashing his teeth in rage, but I pretended not to notice. If I was lucky, he would not be retarded enough not to comprehend the message I was trying to get through to him. Apparently, he was.

He gripped and twisted the neck of my shirt, forcing me up on my feet, "You better do as I say or.."

I cut him off, "Or you are going to do what? Beat me? Be my guest, take a free shot," I replied cheekily with a raised eyebrow as I lifted my chin. I might not have been the strongest guy in there and he was a lot taller than I was and he had a bunch of body builder friends to back him up, but this was my thing. This was what I used to do. I would not let him beat me at my own game.

"You little...!"

"That's enough," I cocked my head to the side to see who it was that was interrupting the big piece of meat. Why did it always have to be him who came to my rescue?

The dull-witted idiot had to take his time to grasp what was going on around him. When he saw that it was Kakashi who was talking to him, he let go of me and turned to face him instead, "And who do you think you are?" he tried to sound superior, but when you knew how little his brain was able to handle at once, he did not really sound that superior to anyone.

"I don't think I am anyone, unlike you. Leave him alone or I'll personally kick you out of here," Kakashi's voice was firm and determined. He was just as tall as the other and Kakashi was not a weakling like I was. In a way, he was actually pretty scary when trying to be it. If I had been that steroid-wreck, I would have packed my things and gone already.

He looked at Kakashi before speaking. He probably had to rack his brain to come up with even the stupidest answer, "I'm not scared of you," he said and took a step towards Kakashi, but to his surprise, Kakashi did the same thing.

"I'm not scared of you either. But if we fight now, you and your friends are going to be kicked out of here and I'm not sure of how thrilled they are going to be about you ruining their night, am I right?" Kakashi smirked and looked over the other man's shoulder and got eye contact with his friends. He was right, they did not look like they were ready to leave the party just yet.

The man looked over his own shoulder as well and saw his friends and via their looks they advised him not to get into trouble. He then looked back at Kakashi and took a few steps back, "Fine, you're not worth the trouble anyway," he tutted and left the sitting area together with his friends. I was sure Kakashi could have beat him with one arm tied behind his back, but this was probably for the better sake.

"Thank you, but I could have sorted it out myself," I did not want to sound ungrateful of his help, but neither did I want to look like a helpless child.

"I'm sure you could, I just have a big mouth," he chuckled and smiled with his eyes. He could not have put it in a better way - now I did not look so defenseless in front of his friends. Thank you Kakashi, you have no idea of how much I appreciate that! "I see you saved us a seat, thanks man," I nodded and sat down, scooting to the side to make room for everyone.

I had kind of hoped that Kakashi would have sat down beside me, but he was too polite and let everyone take a seat before taking one himself. I could not have gotten any further away from him. What a pain.

"So, Iruka-san, I wanna introduce you to my buddies here," I gave him my full attention and he pointed at the first person, starting from the one beside me, "That's Asuma, Itachi, Zabuza and Hidan. Everybody, this is Iruka-san," I smiled at everyone at the table and they all smiled back. It bothered me, though, that I was the only one who Kakashi used a honorific with. Why he did not use it with the others was a mystery to me. It was not like he was not politely inclined so was it because they were just very close friends or something?

"So, what are we drinking?" Kakashi asked and looked at all of us.

"Tequila shots, olé!" the one beside Kakashi, named Hidan, screamed, "I'm not even close to being drunk because of Zabuza that skinflint," The other men shook their heads at their friend and chuckled. Zabuza just glared at him, but Hidan did not even notice.

"Sure, but then you're getting them," the guy named Asuma said a leaned back in his seat.

"No problem, as long as you are paying!" Hidan jumped over Kakashi's lap and rushed to the bar, leaving Asuma speechless. He looked away from the others and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Scrounger," he muttered irritably, only making the others laugh at him.

It was not as uncomfortable as I had first expected it to be. Everyone had a pretty laid back attitude just like Kakashi. Except for Hidan, obviously. This was probably going to be an interesting night.

**oOooOooOo**

**I'm sorry! I know I promised more action to some of you, but I had totally forgotten about this chapter! I thought it was the 9th chapter already xD! Damn. I wrote 4 chapters straight last night so I'll update everyday until Tuesday – unless I get more chapters written today? I should be doing my homework, but what the hell, I'll try to write on the next chapters instead xD..**

**Okay, so there did not happen much in this chapter besides from the introduction of Kakashi's friends – you'll get to know some of them a little better in the next chapter. **

**I wanna know, though, did it get too confusing? I know I get confused when reading a story where there's too many characters at the same time. Hopefully, I managed to make it readable, but please tell me if it got confusing already. *Warning – the next chapter has potential to become even more confusing concerning this xD***

**And remember, this is an AU fic so even though some of you might see this as an odd group of friends, it's not impossible in an alternative universe so please, keep your minds open.. I hope there's some Akatsuki lovers among you because I must say, I have fallen for Hidan and Itachi after writing about them!**

**Oh and I wanna send a special thanks to my three amazing reviewers, Stefanatic, Cloud Traveler and Almiaranger! Those three write the most amazing reviews and I really enjoy reading them^^ They are the reason why I got so excited and went writer-crazy last night. So thank you for inspiring me! **

**- Also, you should read some of their stories! I haven't gotten to read Cloud Traveler's story yet (sorry – I'm a pussy when it comes to potential spoilers! I have no idea of what to expect of an Akatsuki fic xD? But I am looking forward to reading it anyway!)**

**Yeah, I like to read my reviewers stories. A person who writes awesome reviews are more likely to write awesome stories as well. That's just my idea of things xD**

**Blaah, this A/N have gotten too long already, sorry about that xD.. I guess there's nothing else left to say than hope you enjoyed it even though it was a pretty boring chapter and please review – I love to improve!**

**See ya' tomorrow :D!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

I figured out the different characters of the men pretty quickly. I did not have to watch the group for very long until I caught onto their jargon either.

Hidan. He was the alcoholic of the group. He drank more than anyone else I had ever met and it did not even appear to be affecting him. Apparently, he was the kind of person who acted drunk no matter if he was or not. I wondered if he suffered from ADHD?

He was also pretty keen on the ladies, but only the prettiest of them and for some reason they actually liked him back. Sure, he was not bad looking and he knew that you had to play hard to get, but not too hard. You had to raise yourself above them and make yourself appear interesting. You had to be polite, but cocky at the same time. Of course, every girl did not fall for that kind of guy, but many girls did. Buying them a drink was definitely his favorite way of getting their attention, which was probably why he was such a big sponger. He used all his money on women and let the others pay for his own tremendous consumption. What a nice guy, huh?

Hidan's complete opposite was Zabuza. This guy was a bit of a choleric person. If something was wrong, he made sure that everyone knew that he was displeased. The only thing Hidan and he had in common was that he too was pretty loud. He was just not loud for the same reasons. Hidan was loud all the time, especially if he got excited while Zabuza only yelled when Hidan was being a pest to him, which had happened quite often, considering the small amount of time we had been there.

Actually, it was pretty entertaining to watch those two interact with each other. It seemed like Zabuza was constantly suppressing his desire to punch in Hidan's teeth. He slowly build momentum with every one of Hidan's annoying actions or comments. It began with glares, then he started answering back before physically launching out at Hidan and then finally exploding with rage. It amazed me that the bouncers had not thrown them out a long time ago. On the other side, those guys appeared to be regular customers so maybe they were just very patient with them? They probably put a big amount of money into this place every weekend. You could not throw someone like that out, could you?

If you looked past Hidan and Zabuza's most striking personally traits, they were actually a pair of pretty nice guys – as long as you kept them apart.

Asuma was nothing like those two. He was the one who resembled Kakashi the most. He was laid back and knew how to control both his temper and excitement level. He was not quiet, but spoke in a tone that was acceptable for everyone. If I had to put a finger on something, it would have to be that he was a pretty easy victim and everyone seemed to be aware of that and taking advantage of it, which meant he ended up paying for most of the drinks.

Asuma sat next to the most remarkable guy of the group, Itachi. He did not say much, unlike the rest of the group. When he spoke, it was always some wise statement coming from him and the other men never really seemed to understand what he was saying, even though it was not that complex. He did not drink nearly as much as any of the others and it looked like he was just sitting in his own little world most of the time. His long, distant stares sometimes made me want to be able to crawl inside his head and find out what was going on in that intricate mind of his. I bet he was the smartest one at the table.

And then there was Kakashi. But you know him already, right? He was the smart, positive, relaxed, polite, party loving guy who was probably the reason why that group stuck together. Oh, and do you know what he had done? He had actually put on two masks that night! When he was smoking or drinking, he pulled down the thickest mask that covered the thinner mask underneath it and then he smoked/drank through a small hole, which I assumed he had cut himself. He never seized to amaze. What was it that was so important for him to hide? Well, regardless of what his reasons were, he always remembered to pull the second mask back up when he was done.

If I had to do some social psychology and divide them into roles within the group, Kakashi would without a doubt be the leader of it. Everyone seemed to like him, maybe even look up to him? He knew how to handle the group and it was easy for him to calm Zabuza down when Hidan had crossed the line and it was not a problem for him to make Hidan stop bugging Zabuza for a couple of minutes. He was the only one who really listened when Itachi talked and who seemed to understand it better than the others. Other than that, Asuma and him appeared to be on the same level concerning most things, besides the fact that Kakashi could sweet talk anybody, including Asuma. To take a wild guess, I would say Asuma was Kakashi's closest friend and the other way around.

This makes Asuma an "active" member of the group so he would be placed right under Kakashi. If something should be discussed within the group, hypothetically, it would be Kakashi who was doing the work and talking, while Asuma would be helping him and give constructive criticism to whatever Kakashi or the others had to say. In this situation, Zabuza and Hidan would probably be the yes-men. They would just go along with whatever the ones with a higher status said. Though, as an outlying role, Zabuza would be the grumbler and seen through his eyes Hidan would be the scapegoat, but seen with the groups eyes overall, Hidan would just be the clown.

As weird as it might sound, I would say Zabuza and Hidan were the best friends within the group. I based that on the fact that they probably would be bored to death if they did not have each other. Also, it was the only two interacting as much with each other as they did. I figured that they had this love and hate relationship, if you understand what I'm getting at?

That leaves Itachi, who is a pretty easy one to place. He is the passive guy. He does not say or do much and does not contribute with as much to the group in proportion to the others. And he did not seem to favor anyone, which made him appear like a loner. If I had to compare myself to anyone of those men, it would have to be Itachi. Especially now that I was "the new guy."

I did not expect my seat at the table to be permanent, but it was okay to hope, right? Of course, if I could choose myself, I would rather be Asuma. I would be close to Kakashi, his adviser – kind of. His most trusted friend and I would not be a zero. I would be someone.

Finally, I looked up from the spot on the table that I had been staring at for at least the last 10 minutes. That was when I discovered that everyone was staring at me. They all started laughing at my puzzled look.

"Damn, you spaced out for good!" Asuma chuckled and pushed my shoulder with his, gently and friendly.

"Yeah, you and Itachi would make a cute couple!" Hidan laughed and everybody looked at Itachi, who did not notice what was going on around him at all, he was just staring up at the ceiling, "See what I mean?"

I could not stop myself from blushing and I looked back down at the table, but only until Kakashi spoke, "There's nothing wrong with spacing out. I like to do that myself sometimes. You should try it, Hidan," he spoke in a mocking tone of voice and smirked at Hidan who pouted and looked at him angrily.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he protested loudly, but then I stopped listening to their conversation.

I giggled nervously to myself and scratched the scar over my nose. I had not done that in a long time. This whole situation; it was so different from what I was used to now. This was nice, but the memories... They all came rushing back to me and it felt like someone was piercing my brain with a wide and sharp needle.

"Yeah, you are such an idiot," Zabuza stated before clouting Hidan on the head. Hidan did not look too pleased after that and hit out at Zabuza who managed to lean back just enough for Hidan not to touch him. Instead, he bumped into Itachi. This did not disturb Zabuza and Hidan's newest fight at all, but Itachi's flow of thoughts seemed to be ruined. At least, that was what I thought until he scooted a bit over towards Asuma, leaned his head back and began staring at the ceiling once again. Zabuza's push would have ruined everything for me if I was in Itachi's place, but Itachi just drifted back into his own world right after it like nothing had ever happened. In a way, he was kind of creepy.

"Bear kills friend - bear gets killed," no one had expected Itachi to say anything. He always chose the weirdest moments to blurt out those Indian sounding sentences. Zabuza and Hidan stopped fighting and most of the group looked at him like he was some kind of freak. Itachi lifted his head from the neck rest and took something out from his left jacket pocket. It was the one facing away from me so I could not see what it was yet.

"What the hell are you talking about?" asked Hidan and sat up straight.

"I think he's telling you to stop fighting, right Itachi?" Kakashi looked over at Itachi who just shrugged and placed a lighter, some white paper and a small box on the table in front of himself.

"Didn't you have enough at Zabuza's? I really think you should quit, you smoke too much nowadays," Asuma advised Itachi who finally revealed what was inside that small metal box. I should have guessed he was a pot-head. The spacing out and the weird things he said, it was so obvious, was it not? Damn, my analyzing skills had failed me. Now I could not place him anywhere in the group since I did not know how he acted when he was not stoned. But judging by Asuma's advise, I would say he did not have a higher rank than I had already shot him to have.

"How much more of that do you have left?" Kakashi asked, but did not seem concerned about Itachi's behavior or actions.

"Enough to make two," he replied and tapped the box with one fingernail. Kakashi stuck his hand into his pocket and threw some money onto the table.

"Can I buy one for the table?" Itachi looked up at him and nodded before collecting the money.

This was so weird. I had not expected any of the things, I had just witnessed, to happen. Especially not the part where Kakashi revealed that Itachi was not the only one at the table who was smoking weed. This group of people sure was a bunch of eccentrics, but I kind of liked them already, was that wrong of me?

I knew the club owner did not mind people smoking any weird stuff or taking any other kind of drugs while being inside his club - as long as they were not a big nuisance to any of the other guests. Poor guy, he would not have any customers if he did not let them in since they were pretty much the only kind of people who went out to party in this village. If you did not like drugs and did not want to get involved in any of the business going on during nighttime, you kept the parties private. It was the only safe way to stay out of it.

Itachi prepared two joints and passed it on to Kakashi who took the first drag. It did not seem like Itachi was going to share that other joint of his. Pretty hardcore.

All of a sudden, Kakashi looked more relaxed than ever and he leaned back in his seat, taking a second drag of it, but only a short one this time. He then passed it to Hidan and it continued like that right until it was passed on to me.

"No thank you," I said, shaking my head and putting my hand up between the joint Asuma held and my face. I was a pushover and I had always been that. I too was pretty quick at getting hooked on things – anything – but this time I would not. I had to set a limit somewhere, "I'm just drinking tonight."

Everybody, except Kakashi, looked at me with widened eyes. Especially Itachi so this was actually the first real reaction he had given me since we met. I guess he did not think it was alright for me to pass up on his goods, "Are you sure?" Asuma tempted, waving the joint back and forth. I just nodded and took one of my shots and held it up in front of him.

"Cheers," I tried to send him a confident smile. I did not know how well it turned out, but it made Hidan hoot and everyone took a shot with me. Hopefully, they had not noticed that I was behind with 3 shots.

Asuma stretched his hand over the table to give Kakashi the joint, but he shook his head, "I think I've had enough. I'll follow Iruka-san's example and drink the rest of the time," Asuma just nodded approvingly and gave it to Hidan who eagerly took a long drag of it.

"Yeah baby, that's what I'm talking about!" he yelled, throwing the lit joint into Zabuza's lap as he jumped away from his seat, not caring that Zabuza got burned and was cursing at him, "Come, Iruka-san. We are going to find some girls to do body shots on!" he took my arm and dragged me to my feet. This was not what I really wanted to do, but I followed him anyway, since I thought this was my shot at getting closer to the group and with that closer to Kakashi. I prayed to Kami, though, that I would not have to do any of the flirting.

Hidan directed us towards two girls who were standing at the bar. I figured he chose them because they showed a lot of skin and he probably thought of them as slutty. They did not fall into my taste at all, but Hidan did not seem to have a problem with it.

"Hey ladies, wanna do my friend and me a favor?" he gave them a charming yet cocky smile that almost made me turn gay – I'm kidding, but this guy really knew what he was doing. The girls blinked a couple of times, but then it looked like he had won their full attention. One of them nodded, which made him go on, "Iruka-san and I are really thirsty and we made a bet against those guys over there that we could drink our next shot off of your smokin' bodies."

I was overwhelmed by his honesty. Or? Actually, he was lying, but if we had made a bet like that, we would never tell them, right? I mean, that would not work? Now I was really curious to see if it would in fact work on them.

"And what do we get out of it?" the tallest girl asked with a raised eyebrow. It did not look like she rejected the idea entirely since she stepped closer and slightly touched Hidan's bare arm.

"How does free drinks for the rest of the night sound?" he grinned and stared into the girl's eyes. It was kind of gross watching them stand there and smile all perversely at each other. But there was not anything wrong with his tactics, apparently. I figured he had purposely chosen those two girls and used that technique to win them over because he knew it was gonna work on girls like them. Damn, this was guy was a chameleon. It was one thing that he was good at flirting, but he had great analytic skills too? I never imagined someone like Hidan to be smart enough to do anything like that. Maybe I had underestimated him and the others too.

It then hit me, had he just promised one of those girls that I would pay for her drinks for the rest of the night? He had not, had he? What could be even worse was if he was going to dump the entire bill on me! I was not in any position to complain, though, so I kept my opinion to myself.

"Sounds fair, where do you want us?" she asked and stepped away from him. The deal had been sealed so quickly that I had not even had the time to get nervous about it. I made a mental note to myself: remember to bring Hidan the next time you are on a girls hunt. Not that it was going to happen, but it would not hurt to remind myself of that.

"Here's fine by me. Hey bartender? Can we borrow your desk for a minute? I'll give you a show worth watching if you let me," Hidan looked towards the bartender who shrugged and made a face that said something like be my guest, "Ready, Iruka-san?"

I stared at him, blankly. How could I be ready? He did not give me a chance to prepare! At least I had gotten something to drink before this. I did not even want to imagine how it would have been like if I had not.

The girls laid down at the bar and Hidan got the preparations ready with the help of the bartender. When the girl in front of me asked me to get started, I looked over my shoulder and saw that the others were watching us while drinking one shot after another. It kind of looked like they were having a race and I noticed that my shots had been emptied as well – at least I had not payed for them myself.

"Hey," she exclaimed and snapped her fingers in front of my face. She did not sit straight, but was supporting her upper body with one of her arms on the bar.

"Uhm, s-sorry," now was not the time to be stammering. I had to do this, there was no way out. I would rather not, but on the other side, was this not going to score me some cheap points with the group and perhaps with Kakashi? It was worth the try and besides, Hidan had gone through the trouble of getting me this girl – not that it was actually any trouble for him – but it would be rude to reject her now.

Nervously, I licked her stomach and spread the salt over the wet spot so that it would stick to her. She put the lime in her mouth herself, probably because she was really tired of waiting. I glanced over at Hidan and it looked like he had finished a long time ago because he was busy making out with the girl now.

Quickly, I found the shot of tequila Hidan had gotten me and I grabbed it. With one fast lick, I took as much salt from her stomach as I could. It tasted bitter and it was not just the salt. That girl had probably washed herself in all kinds of toxic chemicals in order to smell good.

I laid my head back and washed the bad taste away with the shot before leaning over her to take the lime from her mouth, but when I was just about to sink my teeth into it, she spit it out, grabbed me by the back of my neck and forced me into a kiss. I was surprised - to say the least. Completely caught off guard.

Hidan began whooping beside me and yes, it was me he was whooping at, I saw it from the corner of my eye. That idiot, did he have to make it even more embarrassing than it already was? I did not need anymore attention!

I tried not to look too frightened, but I had definitely gotten more than what I had bargained for. With all the power I could generate from my half-drunken body, I pushed myself away from her.

"Hey!" she said in a disappointed way, but I did not care. I turned around on my heels to leave; this was too much for me, I could not do this anymore. Somebody grabbed my arm and stopped me from walking any further. This was not a girl's hand, it was way too big to be that.

I looked over my shoulder and saw the man I had nearly faced off against earlier. It did not seem like he was going to let go and I did not even know why he was holding onto me in the first place, so I turned around and shouted, "What the hell do you think yo..."...

**oOooOooOo**

**So, are you happy now, Mr. Nancy? Kakashi managed not to show his face once again and he was more creative this time, I guess xD**

**Okay, a person reviewed the story anonymously so I could not answer her, but she questioned a lot of the happenings and now I'm afraid that others are left with the same questions as her so I'm just gonna answer them here to clear everything up:**

"_**it doesn't make sense for someone to still be earning minimum wage after 10 years on the job.**_ _**Speaking of which, shouldn't he have been offered a promotion at one point?**_ _**And don't you typically have to be 16 to work (though I'm sure that's not true**_ _**for all)?" - **_**1) There is in fact people that work for minimum wage without ever getting promoted. That's just life. If you don't educate yourself, there's a strong possibility that you might end up working in a place like Iruka for rest of you life. I'm not saying that it happens to everyone, but the possibility certainly is there. If the budget doesn't allow someone to get a raise, you won't. It is as simple as that.  
>2) You can not get promoted when there isn't a higher position to be promoted to. If you read between the lines, it implies that the supermarket is a small one of its kind and that Tenzou is taking care of practically everything himself. That's what all the paperwork is about. Also it suggests that Iruka is already Tenzou's "right hand" and is doing everything that Tenzou does not have the time to do himself.<br>3) I didn't remember if I had actually checked the minimum working age in Japan so I might have gotten lucky 'cause I just checked and the minimum age is 15-years-old. So, thank you for the heads up^^ I would have changed it if I was wrong.**

"_**I also would like to know why Kakashi would automatically assume**_ _**Iruka smokes. You also might want to address how that guy went from being**_ _**straight to suddenly lusting after a guy." - **_**1) Kakashi never assumed Iruka smoked, but merely offered him a cigarette out of sheer politeness. And like most other people would have thought, he assumed Iruka was smart enough to think for himself and pass on his offer if he wasn't a smoker. I don't see anything odd in this situation, it's a pretty common one in Denmark, at least. Here, most offer a cigarette even though they know the other one isn't a smoker. It's just something people do to be polite.  
>2) And about the last thing there. I never said that Iruka was gay? Do you have to be gay just because you admire someone of your own gender or simply because you want their <strong>**acceptance? Even if he is lusting after Kakashi, who ever said he wasn't gay or bi sexual to begin with? You can date girls even though you are gay – for example to cover up the fact that you are in fact gay. It's a small village he's living in and people talk. Other than that, no one said I meant to reveal his reasons yet. With that being said, I'm not going to reveal what Iruka's true feelings towards Kakashi is yet. He could be in love with him, he cold just admire him? You'll have to be patient. And read the hints given. And don't worry, no matter what the case is, I'll make sure to let you all know what his feelings are based on^^** **I don't hope you are offended by the fact that I posted this, who ever wrote this review. I did not do it to name and shame you. I simply did it because I thought this was relevant to everyone and that if someone was left with the same questions as you, I would rather try and explain the situation. If you want me to delete this, I will. Just say so ^^!**

**I'll encourage anyone who might have unanswered questions to just come out and ask me. I will gladly answer. And if my answer doesn't satisfy you or if I can't answer, I'll admit my mistakes and try to make up for them^^ So if you, anonymous reviewer, still don't think this was enough, please, just say so and I'll try to correct the things that are incorrect or incomplete.**

**I'm sorry about this. I just don't like to leave questions unanswered. That's just how I am. (wow, it nearly turned it to a novel, LOL! Sorry...)**

**Well, I hope you liked what I had to offer for you this time and I appreciate hearing whatever you have to say about it, regardless if it's good or bad^^! Hey, you won't get better if you are not aware of the fact that you are doing something wrong, right :)?** **A quick thank you to all my reviews, you are truly the best!** **The next chapter will lie in wait for you tomorrow ^^!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

"Let's head back," a familiar voice said not far from me and I felt someone tugging my arm.

Everything inside my head was spinning. I could not seem to gain a foothold, but I could stand straight – well, kind of. There was a man on each side of me and my arms hung around their necks, which was the only reason why I was not lying on the ground. They were both taller than me so when they stood straight and began to walk, I was practically just dangling in-between them.

"What... what happened?" I managed to ask. My head hurt like hell and it did not get any better when Hidan shouted right into my face.

"We just had the brawl of our lives! Wohoo! Too bad you weren't awake to participate. It was beautiful, man, it was art!" Thank you for that, Hidan.

"They aren't gonna show their faces at RAW ever again, we made sure of that, Iruka-san," the other man holding me said.

"Yep, me and Zabuza here beat the crap out of them. The others didn't even care to join!"

"Oh, shut up, Hidan. We all helped with kicking those bitches' asses," Asuma protested. I looked up from the ground and saw Asuma, Itachi and Kakashi walking in front of Hidan, Zabuza and me. Asuma held up one of his fists, displaying the fresh blood on it. He smirked at me before turning back around.

"It was epic, nonetheless!" Hidan just had to have the last word. I closed my eyes and tried to focus on everything else than my insane head ache.

We did not walk for long until we reached the apartment we had been headed for, apparently. Hidan had said something about wanting to go to Kakashi's place instead of Zabuza's since it was closer by and he knew Kakashi always had a bunch of booze stored there. The party was not over yet and it did not thrill me at all. I would rather just sleep it off.

Hidan would not hear any of that. He placed me beside him on the couch and shoved a beer into my hand, but I did not really drink any of it, only a little to ease the pain.

It did not take long before Hidan was all over the place again. He was probably the drunkest one of us all. Zabuza was not that far behind him, though. The drunker they got, the friendlier they got towards each other. Instead of fighting, they were standing with an arm over the others shoulder, singing all kinds of shitty songs that sounded even worse when it were their voices singing them. No talent, seriously!

I sighed loudly and leaned back in my seat, but nearly jumped off the couch when I discovered that Kakashi was standing right behind the couch, looking down at me.

"Shit, you scared me!" I said and leaned forward again, resting my elbows on my thighs. I really was drunk, I almost did not care that it was Kakashi anymore. No wait, I did care, but I just was not as scared and tense around him now that the booze was screwing with my head. I did not even think that much about anything, actually? It was not like me.

"Sorry about that. How's the eye?" he asked and staggered around the couch to sit down beside me.

"My eye?" I did not know what he was talking about.

"Yeah, he hit you pretty hard after you had made out with his girlfriend. It has started swelling already," so that was what had happened. I remembered now. After that guy had grabbed my arm, he hit me right on the left eye without any warning. And that girl had been his girlfriend? Geez, who would have guessed that. Well, that was just my luck. The funny thing was that I had not even noticed that my eye hurt – at least not until now. My head in general hurt more than my eye, though.

What was even worse was that I had to go to work with a black eye! Great!... But... Hold on for a second. Was I seriously thinking about work when sitting on a couch in Kakashi's apartment with Kakashi by my side. Really? The alcohol had really gotten to me, my thoughts could not even focus on the important things anymore.

"Oh, I almost forgot. Here, I brought you some ice," he threw a closed plastic bag of ice cubes in my lap and sent me a smile, "Good thing Zabuza and Hidan was with us tonight, I think they are the only ones who could have taken on that gorilla and his henchmen. Those two a pretty tough," he chuckled and looked at the singing buddies that were leaning against each other. They did not look that tough to me and I figured if one of them moved away from the other, they would both fall to the ground. That was how drunk they were, at this point. All those shots had finally kicked in for good.

I looked up at Kakashi and I had not noticed until then that he was pretty drunk himself. He could barely keep his eyes open. It looked kind of silly, but I just found it funny to watch him look like he could fall a sleep at any moment. How he managed to get me a bag of ice and even think that I needed one was beyond my comprehension.

Carefully, I pressed the ice bag against my bruised eye, wishing that it would take at least some of the swelling. With my healthy eye, I took a look around the room. Asuma was acting like a choirmaster for Zabuza and Hidan, but it did not work out any better. Itachi, on the other hand, was lying on the floor with his arms and legs spread out to the side. His eyes were closed, but I was not sure of if he was asleep or not. He looked content and a small smile played on his lips. Maybe he was dreaming? Nah, it was probably just all the weed he had been smoking.

"You look tired?" Kakashi said suddenly. I turned my head to face him and nodded slowly.

"Yeah, I am a bit tired," after looking at him for the second time, I was convinced that he had been smoking some of Itachi's you know what. But Itachi had made it sound like, at the table, that he did not have more than what they had smoked. Maybe it was just a wrong observation or else he was still influenced by the drags he had taken from that first one. It could be that he was just extremely drunk, but I doubted that alcohol could make him look that drowsy. They probably smoked another joint while walking home. I had only been able to see their backs so they could easily have smoked one without me noticing.

He got up on his feet, but he had to put an effort into it, "Come, you can sleep in my bedroom. Those guys aren't gonna fall a sleep for the next few hours anyway," his bedroom? Was I going to sleep in his bedroom? I could not believe what was happening. Hatake Kakashi himself had personally invited me to go to a party with him and now I was in his apartment and about to sleep in his bed? This was beyond my wildest imagination!

I followed him into what was supposed to be his bedroom. He did not have a huge apartment, but it was bigger than mine. It appeared, though, like I had more stuff than him. It could be that I had to fit my things into a smaller space, but I did not think so. He only had a bed and a wardrobe in there.

"Mind if I crash beside you? I'm pretty tired myself," I froze in my place. It felt like I went from drunk to sober in the blink of an eye. Were... Were we going to sleep together – in the same bed?

I did not dare to hesitate because that would make the situation kind of awkward, "S-sure. I d-don't m-mind," it was okay to say yes, right? It was his bed and he had asked himself. Nothing weird about that. No, it was perfectly normal. R-right?

"Cool," he closed the door behind us. You could not see a hand before you in the close darkness. The light from the living room was the only thing that had lit up the bedroom, but now that he had cut if off, there was nothing left to be seen.

I heard Kakashi throwing himself onto the bed, grunting something that sounded like, "Goodnight," as I felt my way to the bed, I mumbled a goodnight back to him, but he was probably already half-asleep since he did not say anything or move around.

I sunk a lump that had formed in my throat. How was I suppose to tell which side of the bed he was lying on? It was a double bed so sharing it should not be a problem, but I really did not want to end up groping him just because I could not see anything.

My heart beat a bit faster than it normally did, not much, but it was faster. A few sweat drops appeared on my forehead, but I wiped them away with the back of my hand. What are you scared of, Iruka? There is nothing to freak out about, just lay down beside him that is all there is to it. Do not get yourself worked up over nothing, a voice inside my head scolded at me.

The only way to find out where he was located was to try and feel the bed in front of me. I stooped lightly and ran my fingers over the sheet. He was not there.

I breathed out a sigh of relief and sat down on the edge of the bed. Was I suppose to take my clothes off? Kakashi had not removed any of his and I did not want to open the chance of any embarrassing or weird moments so I figured it was for the best to just keep my clothes on. I took off my jacket and shoes, though. I did not want to get his bed dirty and it would probably get too hot in there if I kept my jacket on.

Then, I laid down and thanked Kami for not having to sleep under a double bed sheet with him. This was already more than enough to get my blood pumping.

I would not normally have troubles with falling a sleep when I was drunk, but I had a feeling that it was going to be a problem that night. My heart was still pumping the blood around my system really fast and I could not stop the sweat from popping up on my forehead. How was I going to get through this night without getting a heart attack or some kind of angsty seizure out of panic?

**oOooOooOo**

**I'm so sorry, I did't mean for this to get so short and inane!  
>Originally, the next chapter were supposed to be attached to this one, but it just got too long, so I had to separate them. Sorry :(.. I promise the next chapter won't be as shitty as this one (well, I can't promise, but you won't think that it is as bad as this one)<br>Also, I wanna apologize for my language. I don't now why it got so sloppy and uninteresting. I'll do my best to make up for this not-even-worth-reading chapter.**

**Gosh.. I'm just so sorry :(!  
>Hopefully, you'll be back for tomorrow's chapter – even though I understand if you're not.. Oh well.. Hope to see you tomorrow.<strong>


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

I was lying on my back with an almost steady breathing when I finally decided to shut my eyes and try to empty my mind so that it would not keep me awake for the rest of the night. That plan failed, though, when suddenly Kakashi turned in his place and an arm hit my chest. Out of sheer panic, I pushed his arm away immediately.

My heart started racing and I felt more sweat forming on my forehead. I could not do this, it was too

nerve-racking.

Kakashi groaned and moved again. Was it just me or was he coming closer?

I moved away from him until I felt the edge of the bed underneath my arm. My head was throbbing again and I was breathing faster than before. Why was this so upsetting?

I felt his hand on my upper arm and I held my breath automatically. Something felt wrong about this, very wrong. I had to get out. I was better off sleeping on the couch with all the others dancing around and screaming. At least I did not have to feel like this. But what was it I felt? Was it... fear?

Quickly, I pushed myself up into a sitting position, but when I was about to stand, a hand wrapped around my wrist and tugged me back onto the bed. I sank the spit that was about to overflow. Now, it was actually a difficulty for me to breathe.

Something was moving closer, but I could not see what was going on. Then, suddenly, I heard someone breathing near my face and I could feel the presence of someone that was sitting right next to me.

I tried to say something, but I could not get the words across my lips. I clapped my teeth together and shut my eyes tightly. It was uncomfortable to have someone that close to me.

Kakashi jerked me even closer to himself and pushed me down so I lay on my back again. Slowly, he laid down beside me with his arm around my waist. It felt like he was trying to prevent me from escaping - just like that time... That time where he tried to... kiss me? Sure, that had just been my imagination, but still, I could not help but compare the two situations to each other. Something about this was just like that.

This made me start panting. My throat had clogged up completely and I grabbed the sheet underneath me tightly with one hand. I had to hold on to something, but why? What was it I was so desperately hanging on to?

His fingertips brushed up against my side, gently, like he was playing harp on my ribs. It tickled, but not nearly as much as when he reached my armpit. I inhaled and held the air inside of me as a reflex caused by a state of shock. This felt wrong, it felt so wrong!

"Iruka... san," he whispered my name in a way I had never heard it been whispered before. It sounded almost passionately? I could not answer and I probably was not supposed to either, but the fact that I could not scared me more than you can even imagine.

My fist tightened around the sheet and I panted heavily. The heat was rushing to my cheeks, the warmth being almost unbearable. It already felt like I was burning up. To top it all, the air went humid and it only made it even more difficult for me to breathe properly.

I let go of the sheet and pushed his hand away from me, but it was hard to control my shivering body. My hands slow movements and their shaking resembled the hands of someone with Parkinson's disease. He did not give up, though and his hand returned fearlessly.

"W-wha-wha..." I stuttered heftily and could not finish the sentence. He did not seem to care that I was trying to tell him something and crawled on top of me, sitting on the lowest part of my stomach. I did not know what he was doing and it was hard to sense the movements I could not see.

But then I felt something warm near my face and he breathed on me again. He had a bad breath; a mix of alcohol, cigarette smoke and a slight hint of the sweet smell of weed. I panicked.

I fought to get him off me, pressing my hands against his chest and twisting my abdomen. Struggling moans escaped my mouth and I panted even more than before. He was so strong, I could not knock him over.

I squalled quietly so the others would not hear me, but that did not make him back off, it only made him even more determined to force me to lie still.

My hand curled around the side of his neck and I tried to push his head to the side – away from me. If I was lucky, it would make the rest of his body unsteady enough for me to kick him off. But that was not what happened. He grabbed my wrist and pinned it to the bed, quickly grabbing my free hand and doing the same to it.

Squeaking, shrieking, screeching, panting and moaning, I kept on struggling. I kicked my legs fiercely and tried to wrench my hands out of his firm grip, but no matter what I did, it did not make any difference.

Then suddenly, without warning, he smashed his lips against mine. My eyes widened and I tried to scream, but I could not because of the heavy pressure and my clogged throat. As a last solution, I tried to bite him, but he moved away before I got the chance to catch him between my teeth and he started kissing my neck instead.

It felt like I was chocking and I coughed a few times while holding back my screams. In a way, it felt like I was about to cry – I did not – but it felt like it.

I kicked my legs effortlessly and did not wrench enough underneath him for it to even feel like I was struggling against him. What was he doing? What was I doing? This was not right, we were not supposed to do things like these! So why was I not trying harder to get away from him?

He kissed me on my jaw and on my chin before finding his way back to my lips. I did not kiss him back, but I had given up trying to fight something I could obviously not overpower.

Carefully, he let go off one of my hands and placed his own hand on my cheek. I did not move, just let him do what he wanted. He then loosened his grip around my other hand, but kept holding on to it. Slowly, he raised it from above the mattress and led it behind his back and under his shirt. He was warm and sweaty, maybe I had put up a fight after all?

He stopped kissing my passive lips and pressed the side of his face against mine, caressing it gently with his nose and tickling my cheek with his eyelashes. It almost felt like a cuddle-some cat was rubbing its face up against mine. Whenever he exhaled through his nose and the air slightly touched my face, my fingers and toes curled up and I blinked uncontrollably.

His lips grazed my jaw line and it felt like someone gave me a shock of electricity through my legs. I could not help myself from sliding my hand further up his back, feeling all the short, soft hairs as my hand made its way towards his shoulder blades. I could now conclude with certainty that he had a strong back. No doubt about it.

He touched my neck with the tip of his fingers. What was this feeling? This fluttery sensation inside my stomach. What we were doing was wrong, I could state that a hundred times, but at this point, I would never believe it myself completely. I breathed in through my nose, picking up on the scent of after shave that covered his skin.

How could something this wrong feel so pleasant?

My heart was still racing faster and faster with every second and I was sweating like never before, but I was not feeling uncomfortable anymore. A bit, but not much.

It was thrilling. We were not allowed to do things like those to each other, but that only made it even more tempting for me to touch him in places I should not.

He tried to kiss me again and he appeared to have a more careful approach now that I did not struggle anymore. I bit the inside of my underlip, could I do this? If I kissed him, there would be no turning back. But... I just had to.

I pressed my lips against his and closed my eyes. He responded immediately and pressed back, smirking into our kiss. I felt like curling my entire body into a ball. This tickling would not come to an end.

Unexpectedly, he placed his hands on each side of my stomach. I moaned accidentally and bit my lower lip. That touch. No matter where he placed his hands that touch of his sent a cold shudder down my spine.

This time, he kissed me with parted lips and his tongue skimmed my upper lip. I could not let him wait any longer and truth to be told, I did not want to wait anymore either. Slowly, I opened my mouth just enough for his tongue to enter. He took the chance I gave him and exploited it to the utmost. He moaned into the fully consummated kiss and the roaring sound in his throat made my inner thighs vibrate like crazy. So this was how it felt like to take a bite of the forbidden fruit? No wonder Eve could not stop herself from doing it, this was heavenly. It might not have tasted like it, but I probably tasted just as badly so I should not complain.

I started caressing his back with the hand that was already there. I directed the other hand to his face. He could not kiss me with those soft lips unless he had taken off his mask. I had to touch, I had to feel. The fact that I could not see his face was eating me up from the inside, but as long as I got to touch, I could live with it for at little while longer.

My palm connected with his cheek and I began stroking my thumb up and down. The skin there was not as soft as the skin on his back. This was kind of rough and nubbly. It was hard to describe it when I could not even imagine what it looked like myself.

He grabbed my hand and led it away from his cheek, gently placing it at the edge of his shirt and closing it around the fabric. Did he want me to pull it off?

Unsure of what to do, I grabbed his shirt with my other hand as well and began removing it from his upper body. He groaned happily and lifted his arms so I could take it off completely. It sounded like he shook his head wildly when the shirt had been thrown onto the floor. I reached out one hand and ran my fingers through his semi-long hair. It was so soft and I could not help but wonder how he got it to bristle like that when it did not feel like he was using any kind of hair wax, hairspray or any other hair product.

He grabbed my shirt and jerked me up into a sitting position, pulling the shirt off my body with one quick heave. As the shirt was pulled off, it felt like a million butterflies fluttered their wings and flew from my stomach and all the way up past my ears. I wrapped one arm around his waist and placed the other one behind his neck, forcing him into another intensified kiss. He interlaced me with his legs and threw his arms around my neck, deepening the already passionate kiss.

My hand ran up his neck and back into his fairy-like hair, quickly grabbing a handful of it and pulling his head back, breaking the kiss. He pressed his naked upper body against mine and whimpered. I was not going to let him take control. Now I was going to show him what I was made of.

I licked him all the way from the beginning of his neck till I reached his earlobe. He did not taste like that bitch I had given a body shot. He did not taste of various chemicals or perfumes. He tasted humanly and salty, but the last thing was because of the sweat his body was soaked in. This felt so good.

Desiring to hear him moan for me, I nibbled at his ear and bore my nails into his back. He gave me what I wanted.

I let go of his hair and his chest slammed into mine. He leaned the side of his head against mine, resting his sharp chin on my shoulder. It hurt, but I did not complain. His heart beat fast against my chest and I could not stop myself from smiling. It felt good to be able to make another human being feel like that.

Kakashi shifted restlessly in my lap and he made an uncomfortable sound. I did not know what was wrong with him, but I could not get myself to ruin the beautiful silence. Instead, I wrapped both my arms around him and gave him a small hug. It did not make any difference, though and suddenly he started gagging.

He pushed himself out of my embrace and away from me, throwing himself towards the other side of the bed. I could hear that he was puking onto the floor.

I felt my way to him and placed myself behind him, gently brushing his hair away from his face. The vomit smelled horrible, but I did not want leave his side. He kept gagging, but only puked 3 out of 15 times.

When he was done, he collapsed into my arms. I turned him around to face him, even though we could not see each other. His breath was ten times worse than before, but I just breathed through my mouth instead of my nose. I could kind of taste it, but the taste was not as strong as the smell.

I cupped his face with my hands and whispered, "Feeling better?" he nodded as an answer. His body felt weaker and I had to hold him with at least one arm or else he would fall either onto the bed or down at the puke covered floor. I stretched out my free arm until I reached one of the pillows, quickly pulling off the cover.

I let Kakashi fall back into my arms again and made him rest the back of his head on my shoulder. I wiped his mouth with the cover, threw it onto the floor and pulled him towards the middle of the bed, carefully laying him down at it. I tugged the pillow that still had a cover on it underneath his head before laying down beside him.

He groaned quietly and nuzzled up against me, placing his head on my shoulder instead of the pillow. I blinked a few times, not believing what he had just done. I was not sure if it was okay with him, but I put my arm around his shoulder so he could lie more comfortably. Discreetly, I pressed him closer to me. He did not protest, only duck his nose deeper into my skin. It felt good to be useful.

I breathed out heavily. Never in my entire life had I done anything like this or even dreamt of doing it. I had had the most incredibly feeling throughout the whole thing – at first, I did not like it, but once I had gotten used to it, it was addicting. I did not really know what we had been doing. It was not sex, far from it. It was something better than that. Something way better. Just lying there with him felt better than any of the sex I had ever had.

That night had been so surrealistic that I did not even know what to do when the morning would finally come. It was probably going to be awkward, but I did not want to care about that. Pretty unlike me not to consider all the possible things that could go wrong, but it just was not worth considering at the time. I would rather enjoy the feeling of holding someone close to me. Holding Kakashi close.

**oOooOooOo**

**Yay, chapter 11 is now published :D – as you can see, lol xD...**

**This was the chapter that was supposed to be one chapter together with chapter 10, but I figured it would get too long and decided to split them (I know, bad idea!)**

**So, are you excited to find out what's going to happen the next day? Well, I have good news! I managed to write yet another chapter here the other day, so chapter 12 will be up tomorrow already^^! So, I'm really looking forward to hear what you think of the story so far and what you think of this chapter. Oh, and should I change it to M rated? I have no idea if the drunkness, high characters and slightly sexual contents is too much for the T rating to bear. So please, tell me if I should change it.**

**That's all for today. Hopefully you enjoyed the action that I promised you a long time ago xD **


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

***Special chapter: Kakashi's point of view***

That morning, after the party, I was aroused by the sound of my hungry stomach. The strong head ache I felt when sitting up in my bed told me that I was going to have a huge hangover for the rest of the day. But when you look at the bright side, it was nothing that a few painkillers would not be able to ease.

I closed my eyes and rubbed my temples while wincing because of the pain. This definitely had to be the biggest downside to drinking. Partying was a big part of my life and I loved it, but sometimes I wondered how I managed to drag my useless body anywhere the day after a night that had been more than just rich on alcohol. If I remembered correctly, I swore to myself never to drink again every time I felt like this, but I could not keep it and ended up going on a booze bender the next weekend anyway.

The smell of vomit finally reached my nostrils. My brain did not catch the sickening smell at first, but then it slowly began to function the least bit normal again. I opened my eyes and looked at the part of the bed that was ahead of me. It did not look like I had puked in the bed, which I was thankful for since it had happened quite a few times before. When I could not see any puke, I figured the smell had to come from inside the living room.

Then I noticed something out of the ordinary. A pair of feet turned upside down was lying next to me. My sight glided from the feet and up the body of the quiet person and I did not recognize him until I reached his head.

Iruka was lying shirtless on his stomach with his head turned away from me and with one arm hanging from the edge of the bed. I could not keep myself from smiling, but held my laughter back, when I saw that he was drooling all over the sheets. It did not really bother me, I was going to change those sheets anyway.

I stretched my arms over my head and kept stretching them until my spine cracked from my neck and all the way down to where it ended. This was followed by a low growl and a wide yawn. In a way, I felt kind of good that morning if you looked past the enormous pressure behind my forehead and temples. Rested; that was probably the best word to describe how I felt. My eyes did not burn the way they usually did when waking up from a night out and it was a relief to find out that I was able to keep my eyes open without having to feel like someone had been poking my naked eyeballs all night.

When I let my arms drop back into my lap, one of my fingers grazed my upper body and I noticed that I was not wearing a shirt, which meant I was not wearing a mask either. How weird, I usually did not take off my mask when there was anybody around. It was nothing to freak out about, though. For now, I could just cover it with my hand and I figured that the guys would have decency enough not to comment on it if any of them were awake yet. They knew I did not like showing my face, not even to myself.

In one quick motion, I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and got up on my feet. As I took a step forward, I figured a few painkillers and some junk food would make this morning perfect, but when my foot landed on the ground again, I stepped in something wet and slippery and went down with a wallop in a split second.

"What the...?" I muttered to myself and looked down to see what it was that I had slipped in. Judging by the intensified smell of the remains of yesterday, I should have guessed that I had discovered the vomits hiding place – but I did not – and when I saw what kind of slimy pool I was sitting in, I sighed loudly and felt a shiver run down my spine. This was so gross. Now I had to take a bath before even thinking of touching anything, which meant no food and no painkillers for me yet.

I craned my neck to look over the edge of the bed. Luckily for me, it looked like Iruka was still sleeping. With a sigh and a bit difficulty, I got up again and stepped over the yellow substance on the floor. How could I not remember that I had puked? You would think that I had put two and two together when I woke up with a bad taste in my mouth and a dry and rough feeling when running my tongue over the surface of my teeth, but no, I never thought of checking the room for any vomit attacks. Kami, I even noticed the smell and I still did not bother to watch the ground before trudging fearlessly across the floor. I must have looked pretty stupid in that situation.

My mind was set on getting that stinky goo off my body before doing anything else so I headed straight for the bathroom. Though, I could not help but notice on my way out there that Itachi was sleeping on the floor. Hidan, Zabuza and Asuma was asleep too. The first mentioned lay on the couch, the second was sitting on the floor up against a wall and and the third sat almost straight on a chair. That last one really knew how to sleep in the weirdest positions.

When I got under the shower head, I turned on the water immediately, without even removing my pants first and started scrubbing the vomit off my body. The cold water was refreshing and it gave me goosebumps. I laid my head back, letting the water hit my exposed neck and pale chest. My eyes widened and I started panting lightly. The water felt even colder against my chest than any other body part.

Quickly, I turned up the heat, my whole body shuddering when the water went from cold to warm in only a few seconds. I always began my showers with cold water, it made me feel more awake.

I ran a hand over my face before grabbing the facecloth, which always hung inside the shower, and tied it around the lower part of my face. That was just something that I always did.

After making sure that the majority of the vomit had come off my pants, I unbuttoned them and was just about to take them off when, suddenly, I heard someone gasping not far from me. I turned my head and saw Iruka standing in the doorway with wide eyes and a dropped jaw that could almost touch the ground. His eyebrows turned upwards and I interpreted it as an apology.

"What's up?" I asked and smiled at him, but he did not smile back, only backed out of the room.

"I'm so sorry!" he apologized and closed the door quickly behind him. I must have looked kind of puzzled after that because I did not understand his reaction at all. I was not modest, but I guess he was? I shrugged to myself and figured it was about time that I got that shower curtain, which Hidan had torn down one weekend in drunkenness, back up again. Oh, and I should probably get used to locking the door whenever someone else besides me was in my apartment. Me and my bad habits.

When I was done showering, I put on some clean clothes that lay inside the bathroom already. I walked by the mirror and stopped to take a quick look at my reflection. It was scary, I could hardly recognize myself without the mask on. I was actually pretty damn tired of always having to wear that thing. It got hot behind the sound-absorbing piece of cloth pretty easily and the way it stuck to my face when I was sweating gave a nasty feeling. I hated it, but showing people my true face was just not an option. I was lucky that I had put on the facecloth before Iruka had walked in. I could not even begin to imagine how he would have looked like if that was not the case.

I sighed loudly. There was a touch of despair in my voice. Should I not have been used to this by now after all those years? Apparently not. Carefully, I ran three fingers over my right cheek, suddenly feeling like grabbing onto my skin and just rip it off. These melancholic emotions sometimes scared me so I pulled up my mask, as I had done it many times before in an attempt to forget about everything regarding my lower face, and walked out of the bathroom, pretending not to care about my flaws. I did not want to think about it any further.

Everyone besides Itachi had woken up. Asuma and Zabuza sat in front of the TV, watching some series. It did not look like they actually cared about it, they were probably just watching it in order to relax.

Iruka sat on the couch next to Hidan and it appeared like they were talking. It made me happy to see that at least one of them had accepted Iruka already. They both looked over their shoulder and over at me and I beamed them a smile. Hidan smiled back, but Iruka chose to look away from me, for some reason? That guy was a real puzzle to me, but my guess was he was still embarrassed after walking in on me while I was showering.

"How are you feeling today?" I asked, the smile never leaving my eyes.

"Great, as always," Hidan smiled with his teeth showing in a triumphing way. That man had never had a hangover in his entire life and I could not figure out how he prevented it from happening. I had heard about some people that did not get hangovers ever no matter what they drank, mixed or how much they drank. But those kind of people were rare and I had a hard time believing that Hidan was one of them. He could just be acting like he was okay, but on the other hand, no one could be that good of an actor.

"I wasn't talking you, I was asking Iruka-san," actually, I was speaking to everyone in general, but since no one else besides Hidan chose to answer, I figured I might as well grab the opportunity to wipe that smirk off his face. Don't get me wrong, though. Hidan was one of my best friends. I just liked to bully him.

Iruka looked up at me and I made sure to keep smiling. It did not seem like he was going to answer, so I asked him again. This time he answered, "I'm fine, I guess," Iruka always sounded so unsure of himself. Sometimes I wondered if he usually just answered what was expected of him or what he thought people wanted to hear instead of just answering what he really wanted. Like with the smoking thing. I was almost certain that he had never smoked before, but he went along anyway whenever I asked him.

That first time he came along, he coughed so much that it was hard to believe he had ever even been close to someone who had been smoking before. He had told me that he smoked too much and that was why he was coughing, but that had to be a lie. Or else it would not make any sense that he did not cough constantly when not smoking too. He only coughed like that when we were smoking together. He was not even done with his cigarettes when throwing them away, which indicated that he did not take very long or many drags, which most real smokers would do. But maybe it was just me who was over thinking it, I mean, why would he go out with me every single time I asked him if he did not smoke?

There was something unique about Iruka. I had never met anyone like him before and that said a lot because I knew a lot of weird people. Just take a look at my circle of friends. None of them acted like the other. There was something special about every single one of them. Some had traits more obvious than others, but they all had them. Hidden or not hidden.

But Iruka, he could not hide his insecurity. He stuttered sometimes and he was always considering what to answer before answering – unlike many other people. Something happened this previous day, though. He had showed another side of himself. He did not really stutter, he had said things he usually would not speak out loud – you could easily tell he was thinking it, though – and he had even taken a body shot off some stranger. I must say, he really surprised me there.

The rest of the night was not really that clear to me. After the fight, the numerous shots we had been taken, while Iruka and Hidan were doing body shots, had taken affect so everything afterward was a big blur to me.

But anyway, Iruka was just such an interesting person, which was why I had invited him to the party in the first place. I wanted to get to know him better. I wanted to know what was going on inside his head. Why did he act like he did? What was his background story? I wanted to know everything... I'm making myself sound like some freak who is collecting people with special personality traits, do I not? Well, maybe I was a freak. So be it.

"Are you hungry?" I asked and kept Iruka's eyes locked to mine. Sometimes, you could read him like and open book, but the really interesting stuff was always kept hidden behind those jerking eyes.

Hidan answered before Iruka could even get the chance to open his mouth, "Don't bother, Itachi got the munchies last night. There's nothing left, I checked already," Kami, this happened every freaking time we ended the party at my house.

I pretended to find it funny and chuckled, "I suppose that there's no need for asking then," I was just about to ask Iruka how his eye was doing, but then someone knocked on the door. I did not know who it was and I was kind of curious to find out so my question had to wait for later.

Everyone's attention turned to the door as I walked over and opened it.

"Hey baby," a purple haired woman said when she saw me and kissed me on my mask-covered mouth. She smiled teasingly when grabbing my arms and stepping back, pulling me towards her so that the others could not see us behind the door. "Did you miss me?" she whispered and I nodded. I covered her eyes with one hand and pulled down my mask with the other. She giggled loudly and waited patiently for me to kiss her. As always, she tasted of strawberry chap-stick. It did not take long for her to throw her arms around my neck and kiss me back. Her taste was so delicious, I could never get enough of it.

There was something about this woman that just made me turn head over heels for her the first time I met her. She was so understanding and open minded. Not once had she asked me to take off my mask or questioned me about its purpose. She just went along and saw it as a fun game instead of a challenge that she had to overcome.

After our make out greeting, she stepped away from me and walked inside the apartment, leaving me with a crave for more. I pulled my mask back up before closing the door behind us.

"Hey guys!" she shouted and waved at everyone who waved back at her with a smile on their faces. As she was walking towards the black armchair next to the couch, she almost stepped on Itachi. After carefully stepping over him instead, she looked up at me and said sarcastically, "How nice of you to wake him. I'm sure he'll appreciate that," I raised one brow and crossed my arms over my chest while leaning against the closed door.

"He ate all my food so he deserves to lie there. I'll wake him once he has served his sentence," what I said made her giggle and roll her eyes at me. She then looked over at the two people that were sitting on the couch. That was when I noticed that Iruka had a strange look in his eyes. I could not figure out what he was thinking, but he looked kind of sad. Maybe even disappointed. But why would he look like that? What was bothering him?

"Wait, I haven't seen you before? Who are you? I'm Anko," she sounded so enthusiastically when introducing herself to Iruka and at that moment, I was proud to be her boyfriend. Anko was not always as polite as she should be, but she tried and that was what counted, at least with me. She tended to get a little too carried away with her excitement over things. And she found most things exciting, so that hyperactivity was a big part of her. That was one of the things I really liked about her since I found it kind of cute.

Another thing I was fond of about her was that she knew how to party and she did not mind hanging out with my friends and me at the same time. And they liked her too, which was pretty important to me. Only Zabuza would sometimes have a hard time with controlling his anger towards her, but that was only because she was Hidan's female form. Imagine those two together, yeah, not a pretty sight, but I could not help myself from laughing at the two of them when they were together. I could tell that Hidan really enjoyed having Anko around.

Iruka looked a tad uncomfortable all of a sudden and he rose from his seat and answered, "My name is Iruka, but I-I was just about to go," he grabbed his jacket that lay on the armrest of the couch and put it on, "Tha-thank you for letting me st-stay here," he stammered, looking at me as he headed for the door, which I moved away from.

"Hey, Iruka-san, I'll see you next time, right?" Hidan yelled without moving out of the spot. Iruka said, sure, and nothing else before practically storming out of the door. What was going on? "What was that all about?"

I looked at Hidan and shrugged my shoulders. I had absolutely no idea of what had gotten into Iruka. If I had to take a wild guess, he probably felt like he was imposing on us. Man, now I felt bad for letting him feel like that. No one seemed to have anything against him so it was just a pleasure hanging out with him.

Damn, Iruka sure was a big mystery to me, but he would not be for long because I intended to uncover that mystery! I wanted him to feel comfortable around us. It really hurt seeing him walk all by himself, which he did most of the time. I knew about loneliness and whenever I saw someone, like Iruka, who did not appear to have many people in their lives, I just felt like I had to try and make them feel like somebody was caring about them. That sad face those people had, I could not take it. Sometimes I felt like it was my duty to make them smile or to cheer them up somehow. I knew it sounded like I was trying to save them or something and in a way, well, I guess that was actually what I was trying to do.

I sighed and everyone looked at me with questioning looks. I was mad, was I not? I guess Iruka just kind of reminded me of myself when I was younger. That insecurity and those lonely looking eyes. All I wanted was to help him.

My mind was now set. My task was to officially make Iruka a part of the group. I knew that they had just met him and I did not know him all that well myself, but I could not just stay on the sideline and do nothing. I wanted to do something. I needed to do something. I had to do something.

**oOooOooOo**

**I noticed that this story has reached over 25 reviews, which I'm very grateful for and therefor thought of something – some other authors have been doing this and I actually think it's a great idea and a good way to thank your reviewers. Wanna know what it is :)? Okay, here it comes: I'll write a one shot for the person that is one of every 50th reviewer. I don't think I'm ever going to get over 50 reviews – actually, I don't even expect to round 50 so there probably won't even be one one shot, lol. But well, I just think it's a great way of thanking your reviewers for taking the time to review so now you know what is at stake ^^!**

**By the way, this chapter is dedicated to Cloud Traveler since it was her that suggested I should make a chapter from Kakashi's point of view. I thought it was a pretty good idea and in my opinion, it was just the right time for a special chapter like that. So if you liked it, you better thank her for it because the idea hadn't crossed my mind xD**

**Oh, and I'm aware of the fact that changing point of view might seem as a bad excuse for revealing something that you didn't know how to reveal from the original characters point of view – I don't like when stories change point of view either – that's why I made sure (or at least tried?) not to reveal anything that haven't been revealed yet, unless it was something that Iruka would have caught onto as well without us having to see it from Kakashi's point of view – like the fact that he has a girlfriend. That should be pretty obvious to Iruka at this point, right? And the fact that Kakashi doesn't like showing his face – that should be obvious to obvious to Iruka by now as well. Those were just examples. So as you can see, I tried not to write anything that Iruka wouldn't have found out himself. This chapter is not an excuse for anything, I only made it because the reviewers requested it and I like pleasing people. Nonetheless, it was fun writing this chapter so I'm happy that I did it^^  
>(I'm sorry, now I'm being all defense again! But as said before, I'm just the kind of person who has to explain everything and won't admit defeat unless the other person has a strong argument... I'm trying my best to to listen to everyone's critique, though *-*.. )<strong>

**Thank you everyone! Hope to see you around for the next update :D (which probably won't be tomorrow 'cause I haven't finished it yet. But I promise it will be posted as soon as possible!)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

****I did not even know why I had left to begin with. The whole situation had been so strange, but it just felt like the right thing to do at the time. This had to be the most awkward and confusing day of my life. So many things had happened and I could not explain any of the actions I had taken within the last ten hours. I blame that on the alcohol, even though I knew that there had to be more than that behind it.

When I woke up, Kakashi had already left the bedroom, which I was kind of thankful for since I was not ready to face him and the awkwardness that would probably be between us after what had happened. So many questions had gone through my mind. What should I say to him? Would he even want to talk to me? Would he be embarrassed? Why had he done what he had done – or maybe a more relevant question; why did I go along? It had to be the booze and maybe even the smog of weed I had sat in that had made me end up liking the feeling of him touching me, even though it frightened me to start with.

I had been confused and I still was. When I thought of Kakashi touching me now, it made my guts twist. I did not really want to think about it and tried to wipe the thought away, but it was not easy when I could still smell his after shave on me.

Suddenly, a young man on a bicycle crossed my way, nearly knocking me over. He did not turn around to apologize, but continued as if nothing had happened. I did not know if I should be mad at him or not because at least he got my mind back to the real world.

I realized that I did not know where I was headed and had not even thought about where to go yet. Standing almost in the center of the village, being in two minds about where to go, I looked around to review my options. At first, I thought about going to the park, but the sky was dark and cloudy that day so it was probably going to rain and I would rather just go home and avoid getting wet.

I rounded a corner and went in the opposite direction of the park, walking into Koizora lane. This was one of the streets I always walked on when going home from work and it was my favorite lane in the village. It had such a beautiful name and I loved the story behind it. I had been told that it had gotten its' name in the 1950s when young couples in love used to walk this way when they were headed for the park. Also, there had been a restaurant where you could only sit outside under the open sky and eat. This had been one of the most coveted restaurants in the village and it was said that it had a packed house every night, which made it practically impossible to get a table. You could not reserve a table, their policy was on a first-come, first-served basis.

Koizora was the street from where the sky was clearest. Because of the short buildings, the stars were always bright there and the moon seemed like it was closer to earth than anywhere else. That was the reason why people enjoyed and preferred taking this lane when going to the park with their loved ones. It had become a tradition in this village that you took your girl- or boyfriend with you down Koizora lane during spring or summertime - I did not really remember the exact date, but they usually put up posters a couple of days before the Koizora festival took place.

My chin dropped to my chest and I walked on with my eyes glued to the ground. I did not really feel like looking at the sky at the moment since it reminded me that I would not be able to participate in the festival yet another year. At least, it would not make any sense if I did since I did not have a special someone to share the night with. The festival celebrated the beauty of love so going by yourself was not an option.

My mind strayed into a subject that I would rather just forget about. I was not going to the festival, but Kakashi probably would and he would bring his girlfriend. Well, I was not sure if they were actually dating, but I figured they were since they made out as soon as she appeared on his doorstep. I had not been able to see it, but you could easily tell that was what they were doing by the smacking sounds. Just the thought of it made me feel uncomfortable and kind of damped. I did not know why, it just did.

I shook my head in disbelief over myself. This feeling I got when thinking of that girl kissing Kakashi, it was a feeling I had had many times before. It was not an unfamiliar feeling, most people had felt it before, I just did not know why I was feeling it and I was not even sure if it was actually what I felt. The green eyed monster lay smoldering in the back of my mind. I was fighting to hold it back. Fighting to keep it inside its dark, hidden cage, but no matter how much I tried not to let it out, in the end, it was an impossible task. It was a natural feeling, just not for me in this kind of situation. Why was it so hard to suppress human emotions?

The thought of Kakashi's smooth, bare upper body pressing against mine struck me again. Fuck. What was wrong with me? I had never thought or done anything like that with a man before. Truth was I had not even considered doing anything with him until he had kissed my neck in that comforting and graceful way. It just felt wrong, but at the same time, it felt kind of nice and maybe that was actually what scared me the most?

I was not gay so why could I not get Kakashi out of my head. Was this really what I had been feeling towards him this whole time? Actually, I never considered why I was – well - I guess you could say that I was kind of stalking him. My mind was, at the very least. But could this be the reason why? Did I desire him? I never really thought about asking myself why I had found him as interesting as I did, but I probably would have guessed that it was curiosity that had driven me to do the things I did at first. But could curiosity get me to the point where I wanted to hook up or at least try and be with another man? I doubted it, but my admiration, or whatever it was I felt or had felt towards him, had seemed so innocent. The only feelings I was left with now were filthy- and perverseness.

Sighing, I looked up at the sky. It seemed like the bad weather was coming closer so I had to pick up my pace.

Things only got worse after I had left that sinful bedroom of his. Before walking into the living room, I had put on my shoes and taken my jacket with me. Everybody was asleep when I got out and I could not see Kakashi anywhere. I had been so nervous and afraid of if he had left the apartment in embarrassment after waking up and realizing what he had done with me. I did not know if I should go or stay and if I should even try to talk to him again. I had never thought of him as gay and actually, it was the last thing he appeared to be. But if he _was_ gay, I could not help but wonder if he had even known it himself until last night. Was I just... an experiment?

But what about that girl? Was she a cover up then or did she in fact bring the kind of package he wanted in his bed beside, under or on him? I was almost certain that I had seen her before, but I could not place her. Who was she?

Well, I guess that was not that important so on with the story. I had thrown my jacket on the couch, which Hidan slept on, and had figured that I should remove the vomit from the bedroom floor. It would be a nice thing to do and there was a small possibility that it could ease up the tension that might had come between Kakashi and me. But when I went out to the bathroom to get some paper to clean the floor with, I had seen something I was not prepared for.

Kakashi stood in the shower and his body was dripping wet, glistering in the bright light of the bathroom lamp. His hair had gone heavy from the water it contained and hung in thick strands, which stuck to his face like it was glued on to it. His pants were open and had slid down his hips just a bit, but enough to expose his prominent and conspicuous haunch bones. I did not even know until then that he had a six-pack. A very fine one, at that. The very sight of him was kind of... Exciting?

When he looked at me, it felt like I had been caught sneak peeking at the girls in their locker room, but he just smiled at me and pretended like there was nothing odd about the situation. I was so embarrassed about myself and shut the door quickly. At that moment, it was doomed to be even more frightful to face him.

I had shut the door so loudly that it had aroused Hidan. He was sitting on the couch, rubbing his sleepy eyes. When he finally noticed my confused figure, he smiled and said, "That was some party, right? So, how's the eye?" I told him I did not even notice it so I would not sound like a whimp, but it was not true. It hurt badly.

Hidan had then started babbling about the happenings of the day before and he actually said that I had been cool to hang out with and he would like to do it again sometime. I was not sure if he meant it, but his loud talking had awoken Zabuza and Asuma. He asked me if I would like to come to his private party the next Friday. I did not dare to say no and figured I could decide whether or not to go later. He probably would not notice if I did not show up anyway. Even though I did not feel like he meant what he said, I still could not help but feel slightly flattered. I could not imagine that I had been so much fun being around, which according to Hidan, I had been.

Without saying anything, Hidan had went out to the kitchen to get us some food, but he came back empty handed. Apparently, Itachi had eaten everything worth eating. In the meanwhile, I had taken a seat at the couch and Hidan came back and sat down beside me. Zabuza and Asuma had turned on the TV because they were not up for Hidan's torrent of speech, at least that was what they had said.

I did not really listen when Hidan started talking about his upcoming party. My mind was reserved for more important things. Kakashi business, to be exact.

I was not prepared for Kakashi's sudden appearance, though, so when he got out of the bathroom and tried to make eye contact with me, I looked away from him. I was dying to know what his thoughts of the night's happenings were, but I could not just walk up to him and ask, especially not when all the other guys were around. And what was I supposed to say? What did I expect him to say when I did not even know what my own feelings towards it were? I had felt so confused.

You could not tell by Kakashi's behavior that something out of the ordinary had went down just a few hours before. He was talking like nothing had ever happened, which left me with a bunch of new questions. Either he pretended like nothing had happened because he was embarrassed and had regretted it or he had forgotten about it. He had been really drunk and probably stoned too, but this was not something you could just forget, which made me come to the conclusion that he was pretending like nothing had ever happened.

I kind of understood why he chose to act as he did, but still, it hurt and I did not want to look at him, but it was hard not to. How could he pretend like he did not know? I felt used, but on the other hand, he could not just confess everything that had happened in front of his friends. Not if they did not know that he swung both ways. Well, that was not actually something that I knew he did with certainty. If I had to be completely honest to myself, he could easily just have done what he did because of what he had consumed. Maybe he did not even notice it was me he was doing it to? No, wait... He said my name. _He_ said _my_ name! This only made everything even more confusing to me. How would I ever be able to solve this puzzle unless he gave me some more puzzle pieces to solve it with?

I had been so upset after seeing how he chose to react that when that girl appeared and started kissing him, it was just the last straw to break the camel's back. My perplexity became too much and I just had to get out. At that very moment so many different feelings were rushing through my body that I did not even know what was an reaction to what and why. That was why I could not explain why I had left. Was it disappointment, sexual confusion, anger towards myself or/and him, frustration, maybe even jealousy? I could not answer. Not now. What I needed was to get back home and figure everything out on my own in quietness.

Finally, I arrived at the street where my apartment was located and rushed inside, locking the door behind me. Today was one of those days where I was just going to pretend that I was not home. Not that I was expecting to get any visitors since it never happened, but I just needed to be by myself and a locked front door made me feel like I was alone and secure. Iruka, what kind of mess have you gotten yourself into this time?

_OoooOooOooOo_

**Lol! I just talked to my English teacher and realized that there is something called logical plurality (or whatever the term for it is in English xD) and I've probably been doing it wrong throughout all the chapters! For example: I touched him with the tip of my fingers – apparently, it should be 'I touched him with the tips of my fingers'.. We use singular in Danish so that's probably why I confused it? It just seems more logical to me in singular since there aren't more than one tip on each finger. 3 fingers have one tip each = tip of my fingers. Damn it -_-' I'll make sure to read all the chapters through again and see if I can find those type of mistakes anywhere and correct them. Sorry!**

**(By the way, I've read the story through once again and corrected all the mistakes I could find. It still won't be flawless, but at least I found some... I'm just annoyed by the fact that I have to do it all over again now -_-' Oh well, I'll re-publish all the chapters before posting this one so any future readers won't have to deal with the same mistakes you had, sorry :S)**

**Enough of that... So, it took me 7 days to update this – I'm so sorry for that! I didn't mean for it to take so long. And you haven't even heard the worst part yet; I haven't even made any of the assignments I was behind with.. God, I hate myself! **

**And now that I finally updated the story, you didn't even get that much out of it, I guess. The chapter was pretty boring, wasn't it? Oh God, I hope the next chapter or something coming soon will make up for that. I'll try to be faster at updating, but my assignments are really taking my mind off everything fanfiction related, sorry. Aaaand I'm having complications with the story -_-' I thought I had the whole plot down, but suddenly I came up with all these new things and now I have to figure out if they even fit the story and where they should be.. Argh! Sometimes I hate getting ideas! They ruin my original storyline -_-'!**

**I hope you enjoyed reading this even though it was delayed and probably a disappointing chapter. Please review, I could really use your blame and/or praise right now since I'm feeling kind of lost.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

It was Monday, three days after the party and I was finally back at the supermarket after a long weekend. Tenzou had not been too thrilled about me showing up at work with one black eye, one slightly yellow eye and 7 stitches in one eyebrow. He had made it clear to me that I was not allowed behind the desk until I did not look like a rowdy anymore. Luckily, I was going to the doctor later that day to get the stitches out and my right eye was almost healed so it would not look so violent. With only one black eye left, Tenzou would probably let me sit behind the desk again.

I was pleased to discover that Kakashi did not have a long shift that Monday and that his shift did not start until later so I would have some time to work without having to think of ways to avoid him. Yes, that was what I was going to do. Avoid him. I could not face him since I was not content with the thought of what we had done yet. I was still confused and I did not need him to appear and start messing with my head.

Most of my Saturday had gone by with reflecting over everything that had happened before and after the party. I did not really get anything out of it and ended up sleeping the day away. It was not until Sunday that I finally pulled myself together and got out of bed. All that thinking and sleeping had made me dizzy and I knew I would not begin to feel better until I got up and started using my body for something.

By the time, I figured it was for the best that Kakashi chose not to stand by what had happened or had forgotten about it – or whatever the reason was for his apparent ignorance. Because of that, I would not be held responsible for my lust driven actions, though, I would not be able to find peace with it until I knew what was behind them. Actually, it was my duty to myself. What was it that had made me go along? Was it because I desired men in a way I had not known until now? Was it just Kakashi and in that case, was it his personality or his looks that made me want him? Was it the alcohol's fault? Had his dominant behavior made me obey and maybe think, in the end, that I actually liked it? Was I gay?

Gay; that word had haunted me the entire weekend. I was not gay, I could not be. Women had always been the target of my fantasies whenever I... you know what. I would not be able to do anything like that with a man on my mind, would I? I had not dared to try, but I had been so curious that when I finally got out of bed that Sunday, I had opened my computer and searched for foreign men's porn – a drastic decision and it was not a pretty sight, to say the least.

I had flushed with embarrassment and the sight of what I had never imagined to be searching for almost paralyzed my body. What I had seen was unnatural to me. The erections, the positions, the... I could not even get myself to describe it. It was horrible. How could anyone enjoy that? When you put it that way, I suddenly understood why there were so many women that refused to take it from behind. After seeing what my computer so carelessly displayed on its screen, my thoughts of anal sex had taken a whole new turn. It was like I could feel the pain when just looking at it.

Quickly, I had grabbed the screen of my laptop and smashed it close. Never again, I thought to myself, as I sat regretful on the chair by the computer that had then gone on standby. I knew that once I decided to open the computer again, I would be met by the same sight that had made me close it in the first place so I had not opened it yet, which meant it had been on for at least the last 24 hours. It was not going to cost me anything because I had pulled the plug out since it would not use much power when being on standby and therefore not go out by itself. At least I expected that I would be able to pull myself together to open it and shut it down properly before it would get the chance to use the last of the then fully charged battery. What a pussy I was.

I did not think that it was good for the computer, though, to be on standby for that long and I was not fond of doing anything that could ruin it since I could not afford to buy another one. I had begun saving up for a computer when I turned 21 because everyone else had one and I had heard that it was a practical "tool" to have at hand, but when I finally got it nearly 2 years later, I was kind of disappointed to find out that this machine was not a necessity to me since I had lived without it for 23 years already. It was not a total waste of money, though, it came in handy sometimes and I did my accounts and things like that on it. I never bothered to buy access to the internet, though. At that point, I was a thief – my neighbor had not added a password to his wireless internet and I figured it would not hurt anybody if I borrowed it once in a while even though I felt bad for doing so.

"Hey Iruka-san," I turned around in surprise and saw someone who's voice I knew too well. I had been lost in my own thoughts for so long that I did not even notice what time it was.

"Hey," was my simple reply and I turned around to get back to my sorting task. I did not want to look at him and frankly I did not want to speak to him. It was not just one thing that made me not want to be near him. Different emotions collided with each other inside my body and it made my stomach hurt.

"So, how are you? You went off pretty suddenly Saturday so I did not get the chance to ask," I could not figure which way was the best way to get rid of him, but I did not want to appear rude, though, was it not always hard not to appear like that when rejecting someone?

"I'm fine, thank you and I'm sorry about that, I just remembered that I had something important to take care of, which reminds me that Tenzou asked me to do something for him. If you are not busy, could you finish these boxes for me? I gotta get started on that other thing," it sounded like a lame ass excuse and it was, but hopefully Kakashi would not catch on to it, at least not when I was still around since I would not be able to explain my way out of this one.

I turned around and sent him a small smile. It was not easy for me to do so, I just figured that it would make my excuse more believable, "Uhm, sure, but-"

"Okay, thank you," I walked past him before he got the chance to finish his sentence. I had not prepared myself for this moment properly. It was so much more complicated to just stand and talk to him than I had originally thought it would be. And all the feelings I had had that morning where he kissed that purple haired girl swept over me like a tsunami all over again.

He was staring a hole in my back when I walked away, I could feel it. I knew that I had made the right decision when the tension in my body already started to loosen the second I got away from the conversation. How could one man get me so worked up? This riddling position he had gotten me into, how would I ever be able to get out of it again?

I purposely avoided Kakashi for the rest of my shift. It was not an easy task, though, but I managed it well. It was not until I got off that I could no longer keep a great distance to him.

My shift ended at the same time as his because of his short shift that day. When I had grabbed my stuff and was about to take off via the back door that hyper, wide smiling girl came in the way of my escape route. She had been close to slamming the door right into my face.

"Oh hey, Iruka-san, was it not? I'm looking for Kaka-chan, have you seen him?" she asked, blocking the doorway so that I could not just answer quickly and make my escape.

"No, he's off now so I'm sure he'll be here soon," I said, taking a step forward to make it clear for her that I was on my way out, but she did not move out of the way.

"That's great. So, how did you get that eye? I hear the party you went to last Friday was pretty wild. I'm bumped over the fact that I did not have time to join you guys," that girl was pretty straight forward, was she not?

"Uhm, well, I got into a fight," I answered, trying to sound like I did not care and yet again made it obvious that I wanted to get out of there, but she just moved closer, touching with one finger my latest bruised eye, "Ouch," I stepped back and held one hand over the eye. It was still sore.

"Shit, I'm sorry! I did not mean to hurt you. It's still a little swollen, have you forgotten to cool it down with some ice frequently?" I stared at her while shrugging. What the hell was wrong with this girl?

"No, I-I did not really use any ice on it," her volatility made me nervous. I was not good with people you never really knew where you had.

"The swelling should not be that bad anymore, you should go see a doctor. You know, if the swelling doesn't go down soon, whoever punched you might have inflicted more damage than just a simple black eye. You could go blind!"

"What?" I burst out the same second she finished her sentence. Kami, was this girl confusing? Her flow of talked completely knocked me off course and all that information, which I did not even know why she provided me with, made my head start spinning.

"It's true, a black eye should be taken seriously and-" when still having these mixed feelings towards Kakashi, I had not expected to actually be relieved to see him, but his timing could not be better.

"Hey guys," he said after walking inside the room, greeting us with a small wave.

"Kaka-chan!" she said happily and jumped light-footed over to him. He bowed lightly and she tiptoed so that she could place a small kiss on his forehead. After sending each other a smile, they both looked over at my misplaced body.

"Iruka-san, this is Anko - my girlfriend. Anko, this is Iruka-san - a friend of mine," I looked at them and did not really know what to say.

"I know that, silly, we already met twice. Well, this will be the third time, actually. Right, Iruka-san?" She sent me a close-eyed smile, I was happy that she could not see the puzzled look on my face.

Twice? We met twice already? I knew I had seen her somewhere before, but I could only remember meeting her at Kakashi's place after the party. And it could not have been at the actual party since she had already told me that she had not been able to participate. But then where did I meet her?

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot," Kakashi chuckled and crossed his arms over his chest, smiling, "You were there when I first met Anko," I fought back the urge to ask when that was since it would be rude now that they both remembered the situation and I was the only one who did not, "I never imagined that helping out with a bag of pet's food would be enough to get me a girlfriend. Maybe I should start hanging around that department some more?" he smiled teasingly at Anko who just nudged his shoulder with her own, giggling softly.

Pet's food? Did she meet him at the supermarket? And I had been present? I could not recall any girl looking like tha...

My mind paused as I gazed at Anko. Purple hair, it was not something that you saw everyday. Well, actually it was black with a purple cast, but that was not the point. I knew I had seen her before and finally I remembered where and when. She was the girl who had asked us for help on Kakashi's first day at work. Had he called her after that? I mean, you did not usually pick up girls in places like the supermarket. So this meant they had been dating for – what – a little over a week? Damn, I never thought he would actually do it. It just seemed strange to me.

"So... Iruka-san. We'll see you at Hidan's party on Friday, right?" I had never really gotten how the procedure of becoming friends was supposed to develop, but it felt like it all came very sudden. On the other hand, it developed quite slowly to begin with, but when we first started talking for real, it all came at once and suddenly we were friends? At least that was how he had introduced me as to Anko - which kind of freaked me out, but I had so many other things on my mind that I had not even had the time to freak out about it properly.

"Maybe, I don't know yet, but I have a doctor's appointment so I have to hurry. Bye," I ran out of the door, not even looking back at them to see their expression or stopping to wait for an answer. I was not lying, I did have a doctor's appointment, I just bended the truth a little since I was not in a rush. I could easily have stayed there a few minutes longer, but my mind could not take it. Not under those conditions - not when _she_ stood by _his_ side.

…...

When I had gotten to the health center and finally gotten called in for the appointment, after sitting in the waiting room for almost 15 minutes, the doctor had given me a surprised look as he laid eyes on my beat up face.

This man, Yakushi Kabuto – or just Yakushi-Hakase – had been my doctor since I was little. In a small town like this one, you did not really have anything called a pediatrician. That term belonged to the bigger hospitals and in this village, you did not go there unless something serious had happened to you since the hospital was located almost an hour's drive away. Here, you would just be assigned to a doctor when going to the health center for the first time and then he or she would be your doctor for as long as you went to _that_ health center. Sure, you could get assigned to another doctor if you wished, but I had never had a problem with my doctor so I just stuck to him. He was in his late fifties, though, so he was probably going to retire within the next few years.

"So, Iruka-san, I see you are starting to go back into your old habits," Kabuto stated as he examined my face, carefully pressing his thumbs against the bruised skin by my left eye.

"I'm trying my best not to, Hakase," I tried not to make any grimaces, but it was not easy since it hurt. At least he did not poke as hard as that Anko girl had done it.

"Good... Good," he mumbled to himself as he removed his hands, "Do you have any problems with your vision?" he looked at me over the edge of his round glasses.

I shook my head, "No, my sight is perfectly fine."

"Have you been feeling particularly dizzy or sick lately?"

"Hmm, not that I remember?"

"Okay," he nodded and started smiling, "I think you are fine then. It's just a regular black eye."

"That's great to hear," I said and began mentally preparing myself for him to take my stitches out.

"This might sting a bit, but it'll be over in no time. I'm gonna clean it once the stitches are out," he found his tools; let the workmanship begin, "So, what are you doing these days?"

I shrugged my shoulders, but was careful not to disturb his work, "Not much, what about you and your family?" this was just one of our usual conversations. Kabuto loved talking about his family, which was fine by me because then I did not have say anything for the rest of the session. When he first started babbling about his daughters and their achievements, it was almost impossible to get a word in edgeways.

"I'm not doing anything out of the ordinary, just sitting here, doing my job. My daughters, on the other hand, are doing great. The oldest of them is pregnant and the youngest just graduated from teacher's college and she is currently applying to become a teacher at the local school. I'm so proud of my little girls," he was indeed. His _little girls_ were all he ever talked about.

**oOooOooOo**

**Did you guys notice something? Did you? Yep, it did not take me a week to update this, it only took me like two days? Yay :D.. *Pats my own shoulder...***

**So, we are moving on – slowly, I know.. Please don't kill me for that! I'm not exactly sure of what is going to happen in the next chapter yet, but if I go along with what I decided on doing at first, I promise that there's going to be some more action in the next chapter – finally..**

**Oh, and for the ones who don't know: Hakase is a honorific used specifically for doctors or professors (people who are highly educated, but mostly only used with the above mentioned..)**

**And Anko called Kakashi 'Kaka-chan' because some girls/boys use chan with their lovers and Japanese people sometimes shortens people names by taking away endings like 'shi' or 'maru' when giving someone a pet name...  
>- Please, don't kill me if I got some of this wrong, I really tried my best at understanding when doing my research about this... (don't hesitate to correct me, though!)<strong>

**So, a new character has been added and he gave you a hint to what Iruka's past looks like. Also, you got to meet Anko again and now you know who she is and hopefully you have gotten a better idea of how her character acts and how Kakashi and her interacts with each other. Other than that, you only got what you could expect – Iruka's flow of thoughts – and I sure hope that you got something out of reading them 'cause if you did not this story would be kind of pointless, I guess, since that's a big part of the story and usually that's were it develops xD...**

**Well, I expect to update soon since I have so many ideas for this story right now that it shouldn't be so hard for me with getting started on the next chapter.**

**(By the way, sorry for some of the looong paragraphs, I tried to keep it down :s!)**

**I think that was all, have a great day/night everyone! I'm probably going to bed now^^ **

**Hope to see you all again later :D!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Time went by faster than expected that week. I suspected that it had felt like that because I had not done much else than work late every single day, which meant all I had been really doing for the last couple of days were sleep, eat and work so when Friday was suddenly the next day appearing on my calender, I was both surprised and relived at the same time. It would be good to finally get some time off. I still had to work the next Sunday, though, but I would have the entire Saturday to do whatever I wanted to do so at least that was better than nothing, right?

After work, I shopped some groceries before going home to my empty apartment. It was nothing like the busy supermarket. There was people everywhere every second of the day. If Kakashi had not been so easy to spot, because of his mask, I would not have been so lucky with avoiding him in a place like that. I had noticed that Anko had picked him up after work more than just once that week, which made me wonder if they were actually serious about dating each other. It seemed like it, but I could not imagine Kakashi being in a steady relationship. Holy crap, I just caught myself wondering what it would be like to be in a relationship with him, why did thoughts like that keep popping up in my head?

I shook my head ferociously so the thought would have lost its grip on me if it had actually been a thing that clung to the outside of my head. Stop thinking about those things, Iruka! Let's have a quiet, Kakashi-less weekend, okay? I sighed because I knew a day like that would not be possible. Well, the least I could do was try.

The groceries I had bought had been placed on the shelves inside the kitchen cupboards and in the fridge in no time. I did not really have anything else to do that day, besides from cleaning since the house was eagerly awaiting for me to remove the dust it contained, but I was not really up for that. With a bump, I sat down on a chair in the kitchen, leaning over the kitchen table and placing my head on it. Who were I kidding? This was not going to be a nice a quiet weekend. My mind would not be able to stop racing over the same questions I had had since that last Friday. Instead, this was going to be a boring, lonely weekend where I would not do anything else than sleep and think, which would only make me even more scared to face Kakashi. I knew that the longer I stayed away from him, the harder it would become for me to overcome my fear of completely admitting, to myself, everything that had happened.

I looked up from my arms that had wrapped around my head, resting my chin on the table. My laptop stood only a few centimeters away from me. I never managed to pull myself together and switch it back on from standby mode and I figured it had gone out by itself by now. At least I would not have to deal with that website. It was not that that I was not still curious about some of the subject that the site took up, I just was not ready for the visual images. I did not know if I would ever be ready for them, though, since I did not know how far I was willing to go with a man and if I would ever be with one again. I just needed to get to know myself a little better and I guess the only way to do that is to try some stuff out.

Something vibrated inside my pocket so I stuck my hand inside it quickly and slid my mobile phone out of it before it stopped vibrating. It was just a message, but from an unknown number?

_12 Riberaru. The party starts at 23:00 o'clock.  
>Hidan<em>

I had happily forgotten that this was the night where Hidan's party took place. I had kind of promised him that I would be there, but I still was not sure whether or not to go. There were so many downsides to both staying at home and going to the party. Well, I guess there was some upsides too. Maybe I should make a list and then decide?

Quickly, I found a piece of paper and a pen, sitting back down at the dinner table. Okay, so a list is going to decide if I should go or not. This could become interesting. I usually just kept those thoughts inside my mind, but solving the problem this way would be a nice change. Maybe it would even be a better way of doing it since I constantly took the wrong choices when figuring out what to do in my mind. Like if I had not went to the party Kakashi had asked me to come to, I would never have gotten myself into this confusing mess. I chose to snuggle with that girl instead of just following my common sense, which had gotten me a black eye. Last, but not least, I would not have started to question my own sexuality if I had just went home or slept on the couch after reaching Kakashi's apartment. Getting it all down on a piece of paper seemed like a good idea, it might help me get a better view of my options and so I began writing.

_Downsides and upside to staying home:_

_+ I won't get myself into further trouble_

_+ I get to relax and reflect on everything so that I won't take any drastic decisions later on_

_+ I won't have a hangover on my day off_

_+ I can sleep_

I sighed loudly. That last argument was pretty lame, but I was running out of upsides. This list was going to be shorter than I had thought it would be, but maybe that was just how it was when you argued with yourself on paper - you got lazy.

For a few minutes, I just sat with my cheek resting in one palm, scribbling near the edges of the paper. I could not come up with any more upsides no matter how long I kept scribbling. But when one of my abstract drawings started looking like Kakashi, only Kami knows why, I finally moved on and wrote down the downsides to staying home.

_- I'm going to be bored_

_- I won't get to socialize or experience anything out of the ordinary_

_- I will appear like a lonely loser_

_- I will break my promise to Hidan_

_- I won't get the chance to come closer to Kakashi's friends_

_- I won't get to spend time with Kakashi_

_- If I don't show up, they are probably never going to invite me again_

_- I will probably never figure out what this mysterious feeling I have is until I come out of my shell and start exploring things, which means I'll have to get over myself and my paranoia and just walk up to Kakashi and talk to him. If he can act like nothing ever happened, so can I_

I leaned back against the back rest of the chair and stared at what I had written. There was definitely more downsides than upsides to staying home. And the last written arguments seemed stronger than than the ones above.

I scratched the side of my head and tried to figure out what to do next. I was in doubt of some of the arguments. Like the one saying that I would not get to spend time with Kakashi. It was written as an upside to going to the party, but did I really think of it as an upside, or did I? The whole reason why I had avoided him for almost a week was because I did not want to talk to him - you know the reasons - but I still wanted to spend time with him? I had not been thinking when making the list, I just wrote the first things coming to my mind so was this how I really felt? I still wanted to pursue him? This made things even harder to figure out.

I wanted to go, but I wanted to stay home. I wanted to talk to Kakashi, but neither did I want to talk to him. I wanted to find out what my true feelings were towards him, but on the other hand, I would rather not. This was an impossible decision for me to make. Sometimes I wished that I had some kind of magic ball that could make my decisions for me. There were even upsides and downsides to my arguments, Kami! Though, those down- and upsides were mostly a question of putting myself out there in a position where I could get hurt or not putting myself out there so that I would be secure. It was a question of taking a chance.

This could only be solved in one way; I had to give my arguments points. The higher a score, the better an argument. So it should go from one to ten where ten was only given to the best arguments. Right, that should do it.

It did not take me long to give all the arguments on the paper points, though I had been unsure of what to give some of them. The results were as followed:

_(Staying home)_

_Upsides: 26 points_

_Downsides: 41 points_

I had given the individual downsides relatively low scores, but because there were so many of them, they still won. Only one upside and one downside had been given 10 points; the second upside and the last downside. My arguments had not been that strong after all then. It was hard to give point when I was not sure of how much I agreed with every single one of them. Well, at least I had not given all of them five points or something like that so I had to give myself some credit. I reached a conclusion and that was the important thing since that was what I was aiming for, right? Oh Kami, did I really have to go to that party?

No, Iruka! You can not start questioning the results. The pen has spoken!

I had to stop myself from going into another quarrel before it was too late. A decision had been made and now I had to do it. I was not going to tug my tail between my legs this time. I had to go through with it for my own sake.

"Oh man," I muttered under my breath, getting up on my feet and mooching into the bathroom to get myself ready. This had to be the first time ever where I had been this impulsive.

**oOo**

I did not exactly know where this Riberaru lane was located, but I was pretty sure it was somewhere outside the village. It was not a big deal, though, since I did not have any car or bicycle, I would just take the bus and I could ask the bus driver to drop me off once we were there.

The drive was short, as expected, but I was stunned to see the kind of house Hidan was supposed to live in. It was huge, which was actually and understatement. It was a big three floored, solid brick house that took up a lot of space, but the plot itself was even bigger. I had seen this house a few times before when traveling from the village to one of the bigger cities, but I had always thought that it was a government institution of some kind. It did not look like a Japanese house, though, it had this American style over it.

I had never imagined that it was private ground and I sure did not expect someone like Hidan to be living in it. Was he rich? By the look of his mansion, he had to be, but then why was he such a big sponger? This made absolutely no sense to me.

When I stepped out of the bus, the music coming from the house became louder. I was around 45 minutes late so the party was probably already in full swing. At least that was what it sounded like. I walked through the already open black gate, which was even taller than me, with astonishment and followed the gray, stone path, walking past the large amount of cars that was parked outside the white mansion.

"Holy crap," I whispered to myself as I got up close to the house and realized just how big it was.

"Pretty impressive, huh?" someone who walked up beside me said in a confident tone. I turned my head and my eyes fell on a platinum blond man in his twenties who was flashing his teeth in a wide smile.

"I had no idea that you lived in a house like this one. It's so... big?" how I put it was kind of rude and I did not know if Hidan took it as an insult or not, but I was just so overwhelmed that I had to speak my mind.

"Nah, it's my parent's house and I guess they went a little overboard when building it."

"A little?" I said, my voice going into a higher pitch than I had meant for it to do, knocking on one of the walls to feel how strong the foundation was, "This must have cost a fortune," I looked back at Hidan who just shrugged his shoulders.

"I guess so, but they aren't looking to sell so it's really not that important."

"It's really, really impressive. Were your parents inspired by America when building it?" I glanced up at the building in front of me, admiring the yellowish decorations that swirled in a beautiful pattern all around the façade of the house.

"I guess you can say that. My mother is Japanese and my father is pure American. As you can see, I get my good Japanese looks from my mother and my staggering American charm from my father," he winked at me before pushing me forward towards the door, "Enough about me, let's get inside!"

Many things went through my mind as he motioned for me to open the door. I had never noticed that Hidan did not look all that Japanese. He was a little taller than the average Japanese man and his hair was too fair. Other than that, all his greasy hair had been combed back both times I had seen him, which was not a common hair style for a Japanese guy at his age. I wondered if he was actually half albino or something since his irises were slightly reddish.

Besides from wondering about Hidan's appearance, I was desperately trying not to show my embarrassment over myself – it was not until now that I had noticed how old I had sounded when talking about his house. Seriously, I had sounded like an old man in comparison to Hidan and I did not even get that I was in the middle of making a fool out of myself when he had been all indifferent about my irrelevant questions. Suddenly, for some unknown reason, it mattered to me that Hidan did not think of me as some nerd now that I knew he was wealthy.

**oOooOooOo**

**Lol, I was not sure if I had checked which unit of measurement they used in Japan, but luckily for me, they use the metric system, which is the system we use in Denmark and the system I have used in this story. What a great coincidence! (- unless I had checked it already? Well, no matter what, this makes it a hell of a lot easier for me :D...) **

**Okay, so our little Iruka is at a party yet again, but under new conditions.. How will this work out for him and will he get anything out of going, or will it be a disaster yet again?**

**Questions, questions... At least I updated faster this time than some of the other times :D I think I'll have some time to write again tomorrow^^ So the next chapter should be up soon.. And I'm happy to be able to say that I have finally gotten the entire storyline down so that it should not get in my way of finishing this story! - which won't happen any time soon..**

**That's all for now.. I appreciate comments very much and I would love to see what you think of the story.. Also, we are getting close to the 50th review = one shot for the lucky girl/guy writing that fiftieth review..**

**So, I'll see you all later (soon, hopefully!) Thank you for reading, you people are awesome :D! **


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

The house was crowded, which amazed me since the house was so big that I could not imagine that one person knew enough people to fill out so much space. Hidan did apparently, but on the other hand, he had invited me and we did not really know each other that well so he was probably just the kind of person who invited just about anyone. Not to speak bad about him, though, Hidan seemed like a genuinely nice person, he just was not my cup of tea.

Hidan left me the second we got inside. He wanted to get me something to drink since he did not want any sober people at his party as he had so gracefully put it – not. So I was currently standing alone in a house I had never been inside before with people pushing their way through the crowd to come from one point to another. I looked around to try and find the best place to stand while waiting for Hidan. I had to get up on my toes in order to get a better view and I discovered a spot by a small, classy table with a bouquet of flowering rush on top of it that was not as overcrowded as the place I stood in at the moment.

I made my way over there with trouble, no matter how fast I tried to push my body in between everyone, the people around me constantly forced me to slow down. When I finally got there, I backed up against the wall and placed one hand on the upper part of my opposite arm, trying to make myself as small as possible. Parties like these were never comfortable until you had gotten drunk so that you did not notice the awkwardness anymore.

I looked to the left, realizing that I was standing very close to a huge black painting. Pushing myself a bit away from the wall, I was able to see what was on the painting. It was pretty simple, only a purple circle with an inverted triangle had been painted on the black background. It looked homemade since the paintwork was not even nor smooth. Some of the purple paint had run outside the otherwise plain line work. A 6-year-old could easily have done it and it seemed so misplaced among the other fancy looking things. I did not understand why I had not seen the enormous painting earlier on since it hung on the wall right in front of the entrance door. I just figured it was because of the confusing crowd of jumping party-loving people.

As I stood there, looking at the painting, I realized that I had seen that symbol somewhere before. I did not remember exactly where, but I was familiar with it somehow. I narrowed my eyes and cocked my head a bit to get a better view of it, but no associations came to my mind. I would have to remember asking Hidan about it later. That painting just did not fit into the bigger picture of the house or that glamorous lifestyle of Hidan's.

I turned around to look at the right. The great double door stood wide open, letting me look inside what appeared to be some kind of high-class living room. You probably did not even call it a living room in these affluent circles, but I had never been in a place like this so I had no idea of what else to call it.

A group of people moved away from the direction I was looking in, exposing what they had hidden behind them. It was an elegant couch filled with people. But it was not just anybody who were sitting on that neat, red couch. I recognized at least three of them; Asuma, Anko and Kakashi.

At first, I thought about joining them since getting to talk to Kakashi was the whole point of me going to the party, but when I saw that they were in the middle of some teenage game, I decided it was better if I just stayed out of it. They appeared to be playing 'suck and blow,' a well known party game that I had even played myself when I was younger. When I was _younger_. Why those grown up men and women were playing it remained a mystery to me since I the only reason I knew about for wanting to play this game was to have an excuse for kissing girls, something adults usually did without having to play a game first.

I watched as a new round began. It was Kakashi's turn to put the credit card in front of his mouth and suck in some air so that the valuable plastic card stayed in place. He then turned his head to the side, leaning closer towards the girl, who I did not know, on his left side. She met him halfway and put her lips on the other side of the credit card. Kakashi began to blow, but the girl did not start breathing in before it was too late and the card fell down on the couch between their legs.

This made me freeze in my place. There was only one rule in this game. If you dropped the credit card while passing it to someone, the people passing it to each other would have to kiss. My eyes widened a bit as I looked at the girl on Kakashi's other side. It was Anko. Would she allow him to kiss another girl when she was sitting right beside him?

Kakashi sent the blonde girl a sexually depraved, wry smile and looked into her impatient eyes intensely. She wanted him to kiss her, you could easily tell that. Anko did barely look their way, she was busy conversing with the big guy with scars all over his face who sat beside her. My eyes glided back to Kakashi and to my surprise, he was well under his way of exploring the inside of the blonde's face. My jaw dropped, I could not believe my own eyes.

"There you are," I turned around to look at the man behind me, my jaw still being dropped, "You look like you've seen a ghost or something, what happened?" Hidan looked at me questioningly as he gave me the large can of beer he had just gotten for me.

I blinked a few times before realizing that I probably looked like an idiot and finally closed my mouth again so I would look more decent, "Nothing, I just can't believe that Kakashi-san is making out with another girl while Anko-san is right by his side," I admitted, taking a sip of the cold beer. Both Hidan and I looked over at Kakashi who was still making out with that blonde. He probably would not have if he had not been wearing that double mask again – the one with the hole in it – at least I figured he would not have kissed her if he had to take his mask off completely.

"Oh, that's just Kakashi. He get's kinda slutty when being drunk. Anko doesn't mind, it's just a kiss after all," I did not know if it was okay for me to ask the next question I had in mind, but I could not hold it back.

"Is Kakashi-san the cheating type?" Hidan looked at me with a raised brow and smiled suspiciously like he was on to something. He could not have figured it out, could he? Had he heard us that night?

"Not really. He's pretty loyal, he would never do anything that Anko wouldn't do herself or that she wouldn't approve of. Why do you ask?"

"No reason, I was just curious," I tried to look away from Hidan, but I could see that he was leaning closer from the corner of my eye. He was smirking in a way that made me nervous.

"Did he try anything with you? I mean, it wouldn't surprise me if he had," I froze once again, staring directly into Hidan's hungry face. When I had finally come over the shock of his straightforwardness, I answered, trying to sound as honest as possible.

"No, why would you think that?" my voice was firm and controlled, Hidan would not get me to admit anything.

"No reason, I was just curious," he was purposely quoting me just to be annoying. We looked back at Kakashi who had finally backed off from that purple dressed girl. He took a shot after picking up the credit card and passing it to the girl, by hand, so that the game could continue. It did not appear like he was interested in taking part in it anymore. I glanced at Hidan who was still looking at Kakashi when suddenly saying, "He's a good kisser, though," I nearly choked on some of the beer I had just poured into my mouth and had to cough a couple of times before I was able to answer.

"Wh-What?" you did not just say stuff like that out of the blue. Was he trying to kill me or something?

He looked at me as I coughed again and my eyes went glossy, "What do you mean by what? You mean you don't know?"

"Know what?" I sent him a puzzled look as I got up into a straight position, struggling not to start coughing again.

"That I kiss both men and women," my eyes widened yet another time. These guys kept surprising me.

"So... You're like bisexual or what?" Hidan looked at me like I was some kind of idiot and shook his head.

"I wouldn't call myself that. Women are both for the serious and the fun stuff while men are all about the fun. I'm just open-minded."

"Did you ever... you know... with a man before?" Hidan started laughing and I could not quite read the situation. This was just too weird for me, but I was kind of curious to see what turn this conversation would take. Also, now that we had opened up to this subject and Hidan was an experienced guy, I would be able to pump him for certain informations.

"Kami, no. I never take it further than till around first base with guys. As said, they are just for fun. I like exploring, but I have limits."

"Oh, so when did that thing with Kakashi-san happen?" we were on our way out to some interesting ground. Come on, Hidan, I hope that I can count on you now!

"That? Well, that was a long time ago and we were drunk. He actually also tried to kiss Asuma once, but that didn't end very well for him. We ended up having to take him to the dentist the next day because Asuma had punched one of his teeth out. Poor bastard," Hidan threw his head back and gulped down several mouthfuls of beer before lowering the can and looking back at me. Did I dare asking him the golden question?

"So... Uhm... What does that make Kakashi-san?" he shot me a confused look.

"What does that make him? Oh, you mean sexually. He's straight. Straight, straight, straight. I guess he just jumps on everything with a pulse once he has had enough alcohol," yeah, tell me about it. Apparently I had been yet another one of his sex victims. It had just felt so real, like he really meant it, but on the other hand, maybe that was why he had been so forceful to begin with. No matter what, this still did not answer the question whether if I myself was gay or not. After all, I had went along with the kissing that night.

Suddenly, I noticed that Hidan was staring at me with a weird smirk on his face and it made me a tad uncomfortable in the kind of locked position I was standing in.

"What?" I asked, taking a small step away from him and hoped that he would not notice.

"You wanna try?" I knew what he was referring to, it was so obvious.

"No, thank you," the way I answered was a little too polite given the situation, but he had caught me completely off guard. I would have never imagined that the ladies man, Hidan, would be into exploring things with men.

Hidan shrugged and smiled at me with his eyes closed, "Your loss, but the offer still stands if you change your mind," he winked at me and snapped his fingers with one hand, ending the snap with pointing at me. I tried my best to give him a smile back, but my body had tensed up doing that last part of our conversation. I could not accept an offer like that from Hidan, it just was not going to happen, "Well, see you. I have to get another one of these," he held up his empty beer can and shook it back and forth quickly a few times before making his way through the crowd, leaving me to myself yet again.

I sighed loudly and tried to process all the information Hidan had just given me, but it was impossible to think clearly in all that noise. I had to get out for a minute or else I would not stand being there the whole night through.

People had gotten pretty drunk at this point so it was not so hard to get to the other end of the room where there was a sliding door of glass that let to the backyard of Hidan's parent's house. If I just pushed them a bit, they started waddling around or just fell, making it a lot easier for me to get through. I knew that I was not nice to push people like that, but I was just letting them taste some of their own medicine. At that moment, I did not care about all those unknown people's feelings.

When I finally got outside and shut the door close behind me, I felt relived and stood in my place for a couple of seconds before taking a look around at the surroundings. There was a stone path like the one in the front that let you around the beautiful garden. They had all sorts of flowers, trees and bushes, but my favorite thing about that backyard was that they had a pool. A clean, illuminated, chlorine smelling pool. It did not take me long to get over there and feel the water with one hand. It was hot – very hot. April was not a particularly cold month, but the temperature of the reflecting water indicated that the pool ran on self-generating heat.

Within a few seconds, I had gotten my shoes and socks off, turned up my trouser legs so that they would not get wet and stuck my feet into the relaxing water.

Man, this was heaven. It was the first time I had ever tried even being near a private pool like this one and the joy and excitement I felt when first laying eyes on it resembled a child's expectant behavior. I usually got like that when seeing or trying something that I had not had the pleasure of trying when I was still a child.

"Ahhh," I exhaled heavily and grunted happily when carefully kicking my feet under the surface of the water so that I would not splash any water on myself or anywhere else.

"It's nice, isn't it?" my body jumped and my head shot up from its lazy position, making eye contact with the person standing at the other end of the pool.

I cleared my throat and felt the heat rush all the way from my feet and up to my cheeks. How long had he been watching me? "Yeah, i-it is," I stammered lightly as I tried to make my heart go into a normal rhythm again. Kakashi had scared the crap out of me.

"Feel like taking a swim?" he asked as he tugged off his shirt. When the shirt was still covering his face, I was eager to see if both his masks would come off once the shirt had been removed completely. I was not that lucky, though. Apparently, the second mask was not attached to the shirt like the other one was. What a drag. But at least I got to take a peak at his lean upper body again.

"No, I think I'm good here," I looked down at my feet as I alternately lifted one foot over the surface of the water and then back down into it, lifting the foot as the other went in again. Carefully, I listened to the sounds the water made when my feet moved around in it since I was not really comfortable with the sound of Kakashi's belt dropping to the ground.

"Well, I'm not going to hold back," he chuckled and I heard how the water splashed when his body hit the water and I felt a few drops landing on me. I tried to stay focused on my foot work since I did not dare to look up at him. Supposedly, he was only wearing his underwear, which was not really that hygienic when being in a pool like this one, but that was not the main problem. The main problem was that I was only a glance away of seeing Kakashi almost completely naked. More than what I had already seen when walking in on him in the shower.

Yet again he was close to giving me a heart attack when suddenly appearing from under the water just near my feet. Quickly, I pressed the back of my leg against the wall of the pool so that my feet would not be floating around by his face once he would realize where he was. He smiled up at me and I smiled back the best I could as he swam closer, placing his arms on the ground at the edge of the pool, but still staying in the water.

He looked up at me. No, he was staring up at me.

"Is something wrong, Iruka-san, you seem a little out to night?" I shook my head slowly and looked down at the water – looking away from him.

"No, I'm fine, don't worry," I could hear when Kakashi moved around in the water, but I could not figure out what he was doing.

"Hey, Iruka!" he shouted loudly and so suddenly that I could not stop myself from quickly turning my attention to him, "Heads up!" he laughed, grabbing me by my arm and forcing me down into the water. At that very moment, I was terrified.

When my body hit the surface of the water, it splashed out to every possible direction. I closed my eyes and held my breath, this was probably not going to have a happy ending.

**oOooOooOo**

**So, this was the first part of the party. Second part will be up tomorrow since I'm done with it already^^**

**I'm seriously on a roll here, I update often at the moment, don't I? Yay, I guess o.O?**

**Well, I don't have much to say this time (which you are probably just happy about since these A/Ns always turn into a novel or something when I write them – sorry xD)**

**I promise some action and some background story on two of the characters in this story in the next chapter – which, as said, will be posted tomorrow..  
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**Until tomorrow, thank you everyone, especially those who review. You people are amazing :D!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

My body was shivering partly because I felt cold and partly because I was in shock. A trace of water was left behind me from my dripping clothes and hair as I practically glided over the slippery cherry wooden floor towards the next door in the corridor with my shoes and socks in my hands. I had gotten out of the water as fast as I could and if I had not been close to the edge of the pool, it would probably have become a pretty embarrassing situation for me.

Why had Kakashi done it? I had already told him that I did not feel like swimming and yet he still chose to tug me down into the pool. If he had seen what a bad swimmer I was, I would rather die than having to face him ever again. The shame would be too great.

I know what you must be thinking, how are you not able to swim properly when you are a freaking Japanese dude and you live in a country surrounded by water? For those of you who are wondering, no, I did not have a pool like that when I was younger and no, I had never been in one of the other rich kids' pools since I did not really get along with them. Neither did I have parents, supervisors nor guardians, or whatever you want to call them, who had ever taken me to the beach or any other places like that where normal kids went when I was still young and docile. It was not that I was a complete moron when it came to swimming, I had tried it a few times before and I had brains enough to figure out how to paddle like a dog if nothing else worked, but Kakashi's action had just flabbergasted me and I was not ready to make a fool out of myself in front of him once again. So when I had gotten out of that pool, I had left without a word because frankly, I did not know what to say.

I could not imagine what Kakashi must have thought of me at this point. I had not exactly given him much to work with lately. I had just left like some diva whenever I felt uncomfortable. What a total loser I was, but can you blame me? I mean, it felt like everything was constantly working against me, like Kami wanted me to fail in everything I did.

I knew that I had to start talking to Kakashi again in time since it would make working together a hell of a lot easier and it was better for my psyche as well, he just caught me at all the wrong moments.

Slowly, I took a look inside one of the rooms on the second floor of the house. I had been looking for the bathroom for nearly 10 minutes without any luck and yet again this was just another bedroom. Sighing, I walked on to the next room, feeling quite uncomfortable in my dripping wet clothes. I had opened the door to both empty rooms, but also rooms where people were busy with getting it on. The next room was one of those. Well, not exactly - there was someone in there, but he was alone. Even though he did not appear to be satisfying himself like many others were doing at this party, I still felt that it was better if I just swooped out without letting him know of my presence, but before I got to close the door, the man turned around and looked directly at me. It was Hidan. I had not even noticed because the lights in there were subdued.

"Iruka-san, you are soaked," thank you for the information, Hidan, I really had not noticed that myself.

"Yeah, I fell into the pool, I'm sorry about that. I-I was just looking for the bathroom," Hidan put something on the bed which he had been holding when I first walked in. I was not sure of what it was, but it looked like a frame of some kind.

"Well, come in then. I'll lend you some dry clothes," I did not really feel like going in there since the atmosphere appeared a bit strange to me. Hidan almost seemed... sad?

He went over to a bureau and started placing some clothes on top of it. I looked behind me to see if anybody was around, watching me, but when it did not look like it, I stepped inside the room and closed the door behind me.

"I think this will fit you," he said when closing the drawer he had searched for clothes, laying his hand on the clothes on top of the bureau to indicate which clothes he meant.

"Thank you, that's very kind of you," this was not the time to be polite and tell him that I did not need those clothes because truth to be told, I was freezing, though, I was not sure if it was out of fear or because I was actually cold. No matter what, it would feel nice with some dry fabric against my skin and hopefully it would make my goosebumps go away.

"Wait here, I'll just get you a towel so you can dry yourself up before putting those clean clothes on, alright?" I nodded and he left the room to get the towel.

At first, I just stood there doing nothing, but when I saw a shiny, silvery jewelry on his nightstand, I could not help myself from walking over there and look at it. That symbol. It was that circle with the triangle in it again. He had a huge painting and a piece of jewelry with the same symbol? This symbol had to mean something to him and I was mentally slapping myself for not remembering where I had seen it before. It was so annoying when I could not place things I already knew about.

I reached down and touched the small necklace. It was so smooth and I wondered if it was made out of white gold. At least it looked expensive, even though it was a pretty simple piece of jewelry.

After looking at it for a while, I moved on to the thing on the bed, which reminded me of how snoopy I could be sometimes. I had been right, it was a picture he had been holding. Quickly, I snatched the frame containing a photo from the bed and started examining it. There was a man, a woman and a young boy on the picture. It looked like it was a family, mother, father and child. The man had short blond hair that was combed back so it stuck to the top of his head in a classic hairstyle. He stood beside the woman with one arm wrapped around her waist. She was beautiful and unlike the man, she looked Japanese. Her long black hair reached down longer than her breasts and her big brown eyes smiled at the camera, just like the child in the picture was doing with his reddish eyes. He had hair even shorter than who I assumed to be his father and it was almost white in comparison to his parents hair color and it pointed out in all kinds of different directions from his head. That had to be Hidan. It looked like him.

Suddenly, Hidan came back into the room and I dropped the picture back on the bed, but he had already caught me looking at it.

"Here you go," he said, throwing me the towel, "You can change behind the shoji screen if you want to," I was pretty thankful to him for suggesting it himself so I would not have to ask for permission. We did not talk at all while I was changing and when I appeared again from behind the screen, Hidan was sitting on the bed, looking at the picture.

"I don't mean to be snoopy or anything, but is that you and your parents?" I straightened the black button down shirt he had lend me as I waited for his answer.

"Yeah, it is. I'm a pretty handsome kid, aren't I?" he tried to sound as cocky and self absorbed as always, but he could not hide the sad tone in his voice.

"If you don't mind me asking, where exactly are they now? I just can't imagine that they would approve of a party like this. I know I wouldn't if this was my house," Hidan kept staring at the picture then spoke flatly.

"Dead," I could not believe my own ears.

"Dead? But I thought-" I stopped myself from finishing a sentence I would probably regret later. Were they really dead? He had made it sound like they were still alive when talking about them. Was he just denying the truth or was he lying? Then I decided to rephrase since Hidan had begun to look pretty blue, "Are you alright?" I sat down beside him and tried to make eye contact, but he did not look at me. This was how you were supposed to do when comforting someone, right? I was not really sure of how to deal with the situation, but I had to try.

"Yeah, I'm okay. I just get a bit emotional when drinking sometimes. I guess I just miss them," I nodded understandingly.

"What happened? I mean, you don't have to answer if you don't want to," I had never really had anyone to talk to about my problems, only one person, but that was a long time ago so I was not sure if it was okay for me to ask. But as far as I knew, people were supposed to feel better after talking about the things that made them sad.

"It's okay, I don't mind telling you," he kept staring at the picture as he continued, "It was back in 2004, the year where I finally turned 18. We had just spent Christmas together with my aunt and her son when my mother and father went on a winter vacation, which my father had given my mother as a Christmas present the day before they took off. We always traveled a lot so I did not mind them taking a trip together without me and I decided to stay with my aunt and cousin till they were supposed to get back a week later," he took a second to take a deep breath, this was clearly hard for him to talk about.

"You don't have to continue," I said soothingly, but he just shook his head lightly.

"No, I have to learn how to deal with this so if you don't mind, I would like to continue," the recognizing sound I made in my throat let him know that he could continue if that was what he really wanted. He then exhaled heavily, "Okay. At the 28th of December, I got a call from Thailand. It was from a friend of my father's who worked for the United States' government. At first, I thought it was something about work, but when I heard the tone in his voice, I knew something bad had happened. He told me that a tsunami had swept over the city, which my parents were staying in, just two days before and they had gone missing. Can you imagine what that was like for an 18-year-old kid to process?"

I knew about the pain he felt or at least I could relate to it. I was not sure of how it felt to lose your parents since I had never had any to begin with, but I had lost the most precious person in my life and I would never forget what that had driven me to do, "No, I can't imagine that," I replied, trying to sound understanding. This was not about me, it was about him, so I would not try to steal the spotlight from him.

He placed the picture on the bed and looked at me for the first time during our conversation. He was not crying, but you could tell that this was a touchy subject by the intensified look he gave me.

"He didn't call me again until three day later on New Year's Eve. My parents had been found dead on the side of a road in a ditch. I had no idea what to do after that 'cause it all happened so suddenly. My father's family all lived in the United States so it would be difficult for me to stay with any of them. My mother and father had only moved to Japan 'cause he was an important businessman and the USA's direct connection to Japan so I didn't really know his side of the family that well, even though we had gone to visit them quite a few times before. My aunt thought that it was better for me to stay with her and my cousin at least until the funerals were over since she didn't want me to go back to this big empty house alone. And so I stayed and didn't go back here until a few months later or so. I couldn't stand being here, though, and ended up moving to the US after graduating. I lived with my grandparents for almost a year, but then I started missing Japan since that was where I had spent most of my childhood and finally I decided to return here. I've lived in this house ever since because I just can't find it in me to sell it."

"You miss them a lot, don't you?" his chin dropped to his chest and he looked down at the floor.

"I miss them so much, though, I never really cried about it or anything. But I would without a doubt give up everything they have left me, the big fortune, the house, everything just to get them back. I just tend to get a bit lonely when living in this big house all by myself."

"That's understandable. You lost them without even getting to say goodbye," almost the same way I had lost my best and only friend – without getting to say goodbye properly .

The next few minutes were dead silent. I could tell that Hidan had gotten a huge burden off his shoulders by telling me everthing that had happened, but now he needed something or someone to cheer him up. After hearing Hidan tell the story of his life, I had gained a whole new respect for him. He was like me. He was not alone and I was not either. We kind of had each other, he just did not know that yet.

Slowly, I scooted closer to him, placing a small kiss on his cheek. His head shot up from his chest immediately and he looked at me with surprised, widened eyes. I was not even sure what I was doing myself, but if I had to try and explore this gay thing, I figured Hidan was not the worst person in the world to try it out with after all.

"What was that for?" he asked, a small, unsure smile appearing on his lips. I shrugged my shoulders and smiled back.

"I guess I'm just taking you up on your offer," he raised one brow as I spoke, tilting his head a little to the side like he was thinking something like: damn, I did not expect that.

"Are you sure? You shouldn't do it out of pity, you know," I nodded my head and tried to appear sure of what I was doing.

"I'm not doing it out of pity. I'm doing it because you offered and because you got me curious," he straightened his back a little and put on a wider and more expectant smile.

"Really? Out of all the people here, I never expected you to be gay," it cut me to the quick when hearing him call me that. I still did not know if I was gay or not, which was why I was going to do what I was about to do. I needed to find out if I was or not, but as long as I was not sure, it did not feel right when he called me that. I let it slide, though, and leaned closer to him instead.

He looked down at my mouth then back up at my eyes as I approached and he smiled perversely. That guy could go from sad and emotional to horny in the blink of an eye. Or maybe he was just happy that someone came to take his mind off things? After all, it was a lot more fun being happy than being sad, right? Not to forget that he was pretty drunk, which was probably why he had told me all that in the first place.

I captured his lips with mine, slowly crawling up on his lap and sitting on it with bended knees and legs placed on each side of his legs on the bed. He responded immediately by grabbing my ass and pulling me closer to himself so that our chests met. Maybe I had moved on a little too quickly? But on the other hand, I did not want it to be all awkward like if he would have to show me what to do and when to do what. Besides, this was the position Kakashi and I had sat in, only then the roles had been reversed and I wanted to try what it felt like to be where he had been all while I did not mind that the situations were alike so that I could compare them afterward.

"You sure don't waste time," Hidan said after breaking the kiss, but moved in for another one instantly without allowing me to answer. I did not know what to answer anyway so it did not really matter. Instead, I moved in to caress his left ear and I noticed that he had a remarkable split on the side of his ear in the outermost cartilage. Weird.

After only a few minutes of kissing, I could conclude that this was not really something for me, at least not with him. I constantly felt like someone was staring at us and I thought that I heard something sounding like a creaking door, but when I glanced over at the door, there was not anyone to be seen and the door was closed. But the this feeling of being watched mixed with Hidan's teeth banging against mine were enough for me to stop what I was doing on the spot.

I leaned back, away from him, and sent him an apologetic look, "I'm sorry, but I can't do this after all," Hidan did not look too disappointed and did not move out of the position he sat in – both arms behind his back with his hands on the bed for support to his upper body.

"I figured as much. It didn't really feel like you were enjoying it anyway. Oh, and please don't apologize, I'm totally okay with it," he beamed me his signature teeth-smile as I got off his lap.

"I think I'm gonna go home and get some sleep now," I felt bad for seducing him just to dump him a few seconds after, but this did not feel right for me and I did not want to force myself into another situation like that.

"You shouldn't walk all the way home, just grab your stuff and I'll drive you. I'm feeling kinda sober after all of this," he got up on his feet, but I motioned for him to sit back down.

"It's okay, I don't mind walking. It's not that far away and I could use some fresh air."

"Oh... Do you want me to walk you home then?" Hidan was a whole other person once you got past the wild first impression most people probably got when meeting him. The real Hidan was caring and thoughtful and seemed like a very loyal friend. He did not even appear all that stupid anymore, but I guess the way he usually acted was the only reason why I had figured that he was not all that clever, but that night had turned my picture of him upside down.

"Nah, I'm okay with walking alone. I don't think I'm gonna get jumped or something like that, but if you had a plastic bag or something that I could borrow for my wet clothes that would be nice," Hidan nodded and found a bag for me. We did not speak again until I was on my way out of the door.

"By the way, Iruka-san," he started and did not finish until I looked over at him, "Thank you," I sent him a small smile. I knew what he was thanking me for, but I really did not think that there was any need for that since I had not done much else than just listen, but on the other hand, if nobody ever listened to him, because of the mask he was wearing when being around other people, I figured this must have meant a great deal to him. Imagine if I had not found a drunk, emotional Hidan that night. I could not even picture how the night would have been like without it and I was actually pretty happy with the outcome of the party. I might not have achieved everything that I came for, but I did talk to Kakashi and I did get closer to one of his friends, at least I think this whole experience had gotten us just a little closer, and I had gotten to explore the idea of being with another man for the first time after that night with Kakashi. I mean, that was something, right?

"You're welcome, Hidan-san."

**oOooOooOo**

**Not much to say about this chapter other than I'm not very proud of my languages in this one -_-' It sucked so badly.. This always happen when I write on a story for too long! Hopefully it won't be like this throughout the rest of the story 'cause that would be a pain.. Man, I just wanna write the perfect chapter, you know? But that's never gonna happen so you'll have to settle with chapters like these.. At least I hope that's enough for you ^^...**

**So, I would love to hear what you think of it :)**

**Don't know when the next chapter will be up since I haven't started on it yet, but it won't take too long 'cause I'm catching up with my homework and hopefully there won't be too much school pressure after Friday. Si I might get to write something in the weekend..**

**That's all for now.. See ya' :D**


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

Kakashi had not showed up for work the last couple of days and I was getting kind of worried. I knew I should not be, but I had not been able to help myself from checking his schedule, which hung in the back of the store right next to mine, when he had not appeared. I was right. He was supposed to work most of the days where he had not showed up. Tenzou had not talked about Kakashi's absence at all so I had no clue if he just did not show up or if he had a reason. Like if he was ill or something.

I wet the mop before running it over the tile floor once again. Some child had knocked over a bottle of red wine and I was struggling to get rid of the red stain it had left. Sometimes I wondered why mothers bothered to bring their children with them when they were going shopping. They were nothing but a big nuisance to them. Either they badgered their mothers for candy, toys and stuff like that or else they were making their mothers embarrassed by screaming, running around and knocking things over so that the mothers had to pay for even more things that they could have avoided to pay for if they had just left their children at home. Plus it would make my work a hell of a lot easier. Kami, I really hated children.

Children. I had not really wondered if I wanted children myself. I mean, I really did hate those creatures, but maybe it was just a phase? Was that not something everyone said right until they got their own children? It amazed me that a question as big as that had never really crossed my mind. I considered myself bright and enlightened, sometimes even philosophic, but apparently even I forgot to consider important things now and then.

25 years old, should I not be looking for a girl to start a family with by now? Maybe not, I had not even decided yet if I was into men or not. If I was, then I probably would not have to worry about having children since we would have to resort to adoption and those kinds of things.

After kissing Hidan, all I really knew was that I did not enjoy kissing just any man, which made me think that maybe I was not gay, but just bisexual or pansexual. I had become more and more content with the thought of kissing Kakashi and that I actually liked it. It could simply be that he was the only man that I was ever going to enjoy kissing, but I would not stop myself from exploring the gay thing further. I did not feel the need for it at the moment, though. I just wanted to find out what made kissing Kakashi different from kissing Hidan.

All of sudden my co-worker Shikamaru walked by and I asked, "Shikamaru-san, could you please get me some of that stain remover you always use?" but he walked past me like he had not even seen me. I could not figure out what was up with him. He had acted a bit strange recently. We never really talked, but lately it had felt like I was in a whole other dimension than him whenever we were around each other and I could not help but wonder if he was okay?

"Iruka-san," I looked up from the spot that I had rubbed roughly over and over again for the past few minutes without getting any real results out of it and saw Tenzou standing in front of me with that usual serious look on his face.

"What?"

"There's a woman waiting for you in the back. I said you would be there in five minutes when you get off," I raised a brow at him. A woman was here to see me? I did not really talk to anybody of the opposite sex so I honestly had no idea of who it could be.

"Who is it?" he shook his head as he turned around to leave.

"Not sure, just finish wiping and you're off," he walked away, leaving me wondering who it could be, though I did not intend on wondering for much longer and as soon as I had gotten the stain off – at least what was possible for me to remove of it – I hurried to the back where I immediately discovered who it was that was looking to talk to me.

"Anko-san, what are you doing here?" I asked surprisedly when I realized who it was. What could Anko possibly want to talk to me about? We had not exactly spoken before. The only connection I had to her was Kakashi.

Wait... could it be him that she wanted to talk to me about? Was it his absence? Had something happened to him?

"Hey, Iruka-san," she sounded a bit down, but I was not sure of how to interpret the tone in her voice or that sad face she wore. I did not say anything just waited for her to continue, "I don't know if you have noticed that Kakashi hasn't showed up at work for a while," I had noticed, obviously. What was it she wanted to tell me?

"I guess I have, why?" she glanced at the watch that hung on the wall beside us, shuffling on her feet.

"Well, I was wondering if you would do me a favor," a favor? What did that have to do with what she had said before? Without saying anything, I nodded with a raised eyebrow, making sure to signal that I was confused. She sent a small smile and seemed somewhat relieved. That was when I regretted agreeing to a deal that I did not even know yet, "Whew, thank you so much! You have no idea of how big of a burden you just took of my shoulders," it looked like she was preparing herself to leave, but before she could turn to face the door, I spoke.

"Uhm... What is it you want me to do?"

"Huh?" she sent me a puzzled look, "Didn't I tell you already?" I shook my head and she seemed surprised, "I didn't? Kami, I'm so sorry! I'm in a bit of a hurry, I have to catch a train that's leaving in a few minutes. I'll text you, okay?" she turned around on her heels, but I grabbed her wrist quickly.

She was not going to get away before she had told me what she wanted me to do. Because of the way she began the conversation, I figured the favor had to do with something about Kakashi and his absence and the way she acted only made me think that something serious had really happened to him. I could not wait for her to text me, not when she was here already. I needed an answer.

When she looked back at me, she appeared overwhelmed. Well, I could not blame her since I normally did not approach people this way. I was not so direct and did not normally take actions like this one. Hopefully I was not being too obvious.

"What is it you want me to do? You can't just come here and expect me to do something for you when we don't even know each other that well. The least you can do is tell me what it is," I stared into her widened gaze that slowly went back into a normal look.

"I don't have much time to explain so I'll make it short, okay?" I nodded impatiently before she finally gave me an answer.

**oOo**

When I stood in front of the door that would eventually lead me inside Kakashi's apartment, I took a deep breath and tried to think rationally so I would not do something stupid.

I attempted not to over think the situation since that could end up making matters worse or just make me even more nervous. It was the day after Anko had asked me to do her the favor and ever since I had wrenched the truth out of her, I had had a weird feeling in my stomach.

Carefully I knocked a few times on the door, patiently waiting for an answer. Only a few seconds went by before I heard someone that started rumbling around inside the apartment.

"_You have to be careful, it is really contagious and I don't want you to get it as well! It's a pain. Just wait till you see Kakashi, then you'll understand what I mean," _that was one of the things she had told me before leaving to catch her train. She would be away for three days including the day before, I didn't know where or why she was going, but apparently it was something that she had to do and so she needed someone to take care of Kakashi while she was gone. And that someone had to be me apparently.

I looked up and saw a feeble figure the same moment as the door was opened. A wave of shock swept over me. Anko had told me that his situation was bad, but I had never imagined to see Kakashi like this. He had huge, noticeable dark circles under his eyes, his hair did not point out in all directions as it always did, but hung lazily around his face. The look in his gray eyes fitted the rest of the description perfectly: dry and tired. On top of that, his skin was lighter than usual and you could just sense at the edge of the surgical mask he was wearing that his cheeks were flushed.

"Ka... kashi... san?" I whispered under my breath - on the verge of suppressing the sight of his ill figure just because it was messing with the perfect picture I had mentally painted of him.

"Iruka-san?" when he spoke it sounded like he was holding his nose and his voice was really hoarse like it would have been after a wild rock concert.

"I'm just here to check on you. Are you okay?" I knew it was a pretty lame question and hopefully he would not notice it or just pretend like I had not asked.

He did not step away from the doorway so I could get inside, which I found kind of odd.

"What," he coughed, closing his eyes tightly and quickly turning away from me, finishing his coughing fit before turning towards me again, now with water in his eyes, "What... are you doing here?" Why was he asking this? Anko had told him that I was coming, had she not?

"Anko-san asked me to check on you, I thought she told you?" He shook his head and coughed a few times. Anko had not overstated his case at all, he really was extremely ill, "Have you had anything to eat yet?" He shook his head again probably because his throat was too soar for him to speak, "I brought you some yogurt. Anko told me that you could not eat solid food at the moment," this time he nodded and he stepped away from the doorway so I could finally enter.

His eyes were following me like a hawk when I went inside and headed straight for the table by the couch. I placed the picnic basket, I had brought with me, on the table and started digging out a disposable dinner set. I had looked up 'kissing disease' the day before where Anko had asked me to visit Kakashi while she was gone and I had read that the virus spread via saliva so it was best if you did not eat from you everyday service. I had also gotten a lot of other information from what I had read so that I would know how to help Kakashi and what to expect of his disease. This time I had to pat myself on the shoulder for being so well prepared.

Kakashi walked over beside me and stretched his hands out towards the basket to help me with unpacking it, but I shook my head and held up one hand, "Sit, please," I asked him and he looked at me suprisedly, but did as I asked nonetheless, "I brought a few other things with me," I placed a bag of cough lozenges, some ice cream and a small plastic bag of red pills on the table, Kakashi watching everything with an intense look in his eyes.

"You didn't... have to do this," he sniffled and I could hear that he was straining himself just to get the words out.

"I'm doing Anko-san a favor and... you are... my friend," the last words were spoken with extreme care. He had referred to me as his friend before, but I still was not sure if it was okay for me to call him that. I glanced over at him from the corner of my eye. What I said did not appear to have a negative affect on him so I figured that it was safe to continue, "So... I'm just trying to be helpful."

I looked over at Kakashi who sent me a small, strenuous eye-smile, "Thanks... That is very kind of you," the illness did not stop him from being his polite usual self, which was comforting in a strange way.

"Oh, no need to thank me. This is what friends do for each other, right?" Kakashi did not answer, just kept smiling so I hurried on, "The lozenges and ice cream are for the inflammation in your throat and the pills are ibuprofen." Kakashi sent me a confused look and I realized it was the pills that made him confused, "Uhm, ibuprofen is an analgesic," he now looked even more perplexed than before, "painkillers?"

"Oh... for what?" he asked with that obviously ill voice.

"Didn't your doctor tell you anything about kissing disease?"

"Well... some. But I don't really remember much of what he said," I breathed out heavily, thinking that he should know how to treat his own illness. Not that you could really treat this, but you could ease some of the symptoms that came along with it. His lack of knowledge around this disease was probably the reason why he had gotten himself a cold on top of it all. His immune system was weak, he could catch about anything as long as he was in this state.

"I'm not an expert or anything, but you should take ibuprofen if you get a fever. It won't make it go away, but it'll soothe it," Kakashi chuckled, for some unknown reason, but his throat could not take it and he started coughing, "What's so funny?" He did not answer until he was done coughing.

"I just think it's funny that you work in a supermarket, but you sound even brighter than my doctor," I did not know if I should take it as a compliment or not so I just gave him a small smile as I poured up some yogurt for him.

"I'm gonna take off now. I'll be back tomorrow morning before work and if Anko-san hasn't come home yet, I'll come after work as well, okay?"

"Iruka-san, you really don't have to do," he coughed, "... do this for me. Anko is so overprotective, I can take care of myself," I was just about to answer him when suddenly his cell phone rang. He gave me a look that told me to stay where I was before he picked it up, "Kakashi," he said and coughed yet again, "Hey honey... You did? Oh, that's great!... Mmm... sure... Yes, he's actually still here. By the way, why did you ask him to come, I can take care of myself and I could infect him...but... okay. Iruka-san, she wants to talk to you," I send him a weird look as he passed me the phone. What did Anko want to talk to me about?

"Hello," I said unsure of myself when I had lifted the cell phone to my ear.

"_Hey Iruka-san! I'm so, so, so sorry, but I have to ask you for another favor. Well, actually it's the same favor, it's just an extension of it,"_ what was it? What was Anko up to?

"Uhm, sure. What is it you want me to do?"

"_I got the part, but they demand that I stay here for the next week or else the part will be given to the next best. I'm really sorry, but could you please check on Kakashi the next week forward? The only way I can concentrate properly is if I know that Kakashi is in safe hands,"_ a part? Concentrate properly? Where the hell was she and what was it that was holding her back? I wanted to ask her, but the time did not seem right. Besides, if I was going to check on Kakashi for the next week forward, there would be plenty of time for me to ask him what she was doing. She already sounded busy, I did not want to stress her any further.

"Well... Okay, no problem. But I don't know if it's okay with him?"

"_Don't mind him, he just doesn't want to trouble you,"_ unlike you, I thought to myself, but tried not to make it to obvious to Kakashi, even though he could not possibly know what our conversation was about, _"But really, you would do me a huge favor if you would just check on him once or twice everyday so I don't have to worry that he is starving himself or something."_

"I'll do it, don't worry."

"_Thank you, Iruka-san, you are a real lifesaver! I knew I was right to ask you... What?"_ she yelled suddenly, _"Oh, okay, I'll be there in a second!"_ my guess was that she was not talking to me since she kept on yelling, _"Sorry, Iruka-san, I have to go now, but I'll be back as soon as possible. Thank you for everything! Give Kakashi a kiss from me, bye!"_ and then she hung up.

I glanced over at Kakashi who was eagerly awaiting for me to tell him what she had told me. Give him a kiss? She did not really mean that, did she? I was surprised that I would even think of doing it just because she asked me. Sometimes I did not think for myself. Kami, I was such a pushover. She even managed to make me promise that I would come back here for another week. Not that I had any business of my own to take care of or any friendships or any other relationships to work on. I guess looking after Kakashi was not the worst task she could have given me after all. I just had one other question: why had she asked _me_ and not one of his other friends?

"So... what did she say?" Kakashi asked, scratching the lower part of one of his arms.

"She asked me to come and visit you everyday while she's gone," he made and unsatisfied sound in his throat and shook his head.

"You don't have to do that," he stated, but it sounded far from coldly.

"I said I would, so I'm gonna."

"Oh well," Kakashi got a weird and despondent look on his face, "You might as well just move in here for the next couple of days then," he coughed and looked at the yogurt in front of him.

"What, why?" Move in with him? Why should I do that? A lump began to form in my throat. How could he say something like that like it was not a big deal?

He glanced up at me and smiled, "If you insist on doing this, I insist that you stay here with me. It would be rude of me to let you go back an forth between my apartment and yours just because I'm ill. I'm not gonna let myself be that much trouble to you. If you stay here, you won't have to go back and forth and it is closer to work. The chances of you catching this illness might be a little higher if you stay here, but I don't think that it's gonna change much if you come here everyday anyway," it took him a long time to say everything that he wanted to say because he constantly had to stop to catch his breath or cough.

I looked down at the floor and scratched the bridge of my nose, "I don't know. You need lots of rest and... You know," I did not really know how to put it. I just did not want to be a burden to him.

"You and Anko planned this behind my back. I think I have something to say here too. Either you stay here or else I don't want you to check on me at all," I was not sure if I understood why Kakashi was offering me to stay, but I guessed that he meant to be polite and modest. Like me, he did not want to be a burden.

"How are you gonna stop me from going now and coming back tomorrow?" I would not give up that easily.

"I'll lock the door."

"Oh..." I still could not make myself look at him, especially not when he was sitting down and when he was ill. The idea of him having to look up at me just did not fit my picture of our relationship. I was not supposed to look down at him. It had to be the other way around.

"Besides, this is the only way I can pay you back for looking after me. I would rather see that you did not come here just to check on me, but if you are going to do Anko this favor regardless of what I say, won't you please just do this one thing for me? I'm sure it'll make things a little easier on you and don't worry, I'm not planning to have you look after me all day. As said, I can take care of myself," he sounded tired and almost resigned.

I took a deep breath and exhaled before answering. It would be easier for both of us if I just gave up now since Kakashi was determined and I had a feeling that the 'locking the door' part was not just a threat, "Okay," I wanted to say something like 'but I'll leave as soon as Anko-san comes back' or 'but I'll leave if I become a burden to you,' but I figured dropping the discussion was for the better sake. Besides, I did not want to sound ungrateful, whiny or too insecure of myself, I already sounded like that in most other situations. No need to underline it.

**oOooOooOo**

**Noooo! I totally forgot to make Tenzou use a honorific with Iruka, I'm so sorry! Okay, I've edited all the chapters where Tenzou was addressing Iruka, hopefully I got them all.. And actually, I wasn't sure what honorific was the right one for Tenzou to use with Iruka. I read that some of the higher ranked in a firm called the lower ranked people kun and the lower ranked called the higher ranked dono, but the supermarket is very small and so is the village and given Iruka and Tenzou's relationship, I figured they would just use san with each other – even though Iruka only addresses Tenzou as boss. Hope it's not to wrong of me to use it like that – please, correct me if I'm totally wrong about this :S (Oh, and I haven't replaced the chapters yet where he addresses him without a honorific, but I promise to do it soon^^)**

**Jesus, it took me like forever to make write this chapter! I'm REALLY sorry about this delay :(! I promise, it won't happen again! I have easter break now so I'll not have anything to do for the next week (as far as I know?) so I have a lot of time to write on this story :D!**

**I'm not sure what to think of this chapter, but I didn't want it to follow the same pattern as always (action, no action, action, no action) so now you got "action" two times in a row without there being too much action in this chapter. I think the story have develop enough at this point for me to do something like this. Hopefully you agree^^ I bet you were (if you weren't already) tired of all the chapters that only contained Iruka's thoughts. Time for a change :D I'm not dismissing those chapters, though. Can't promise that there won't be any like that in the future. But let's just say that the story is finally picking up speed like a normal story should at some point :D.. **

**Please review, I LOVE to hear what you think of the story and don't hold yourself back if you have any questions. I would love to answer them regardless of what question it is.. **

**By the way, I tried make this chapter a little longer than my average chapters to make up for my delay. Hope it's okay with you^^**

**Until next time, see ya' :D!**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Lol! I just checked the last chapter for mistakes and I was more than just surprised by some of the mistakes I had made xD – embarrassing. For example: I had wrote 'compliment' with and 'e' and wrote 'every' in a sentence where it should have said 'ever'.. Blaah! Though my biggest mistake must have been that I had wrote Iruka could see that Kakashi's nose was galled (he is wearing a God damn mask, LoveToTheCucumber, what the hell were you thinking xD?) But don't worry, I changed that part to something else instead (can't believe that nobody pointed that out?)... I just added a few things here and there, nothing big so it's not like the changes will actually make any impact on the story. So don't worry :)! **

**Chapter 19**

"Hey Kakashi-san?"After that talk Kakashi and I had had earlier, I had moved some of my things over to his place so I would not have to go back to my own apartment every time I needed clean clothes and stuff like that. He had eaten some of the yoghurt I had given him while I was gone. Not everything, but at least some of it. When I was finally done unpacking, it was way past dinnertime and Kakashi and I had chosen to spend the evening in front of the television. There was not really anything worth watching and after sitting in an awkward silence beside Kakashi for nearly an hour, I just could not take it anymore.

Kakashi turned his attention away from the TV and looked directly at me, "Mmm?" he hummed.

"I was wondering about something, but I haven't asked yet since I figured that it wasn't really any of my business. But... Uhm... What is it Anko-san is doing right now?" I was actually being pretty rude. It was one thing to stick one's nose into others' business, but practically forcing someone to talk when they had trouble speaking seemed like an even worse crime. It was not just rude, it was inconsiderate of me, to put it bluntly.

"She had an audition and she got the part," he said and tried to make it sound like it was not a battle for him to answer.

"Anko-san is an actress? Wow, I had no idea. So where was the audition held and was she auditioning for a part in a movie or something for the theater?" It did not take more than that to get me curious enough to forget all about the obstacles Kakashi had to overcome just to answer.

"Yokohama... By train that's five hours away from here so that's why she couldn't shuttle to and from there... And it's for the theater." Now I finally understood why she needed someone to take care of Kakashi for her.

"Really? That's pretty cool. What's the play called and what role did she get?"

"See, that's where I'm a bad boyfriend. I don't remember the name of the play, but I remember her saying that it was predicted to become huge... She got the leading part, though. I guess it just doesn't really matter to me whether the play is famous or not, the fact that she got the part that she wanted is what makes me proud." I knew he had all the right to be proud of her, considering that it was his girlfriend and that she had achieved something big, but I just could not help myself from feeling a little down when he said that last part. If he was proud of her, that meant he actually cared about her, which made me kind of jealous of her.

"I can see why you're proud of her. That's really something," I sent him a small smile when he smiled at me proudly. Kakashi would not have to get some big role in a play to make me proud of him.

I quickly turned my head to look at the TV. How did I manage to get embarrassed about my own damn thoughts?

Kakashi leaned forward, grabbed a cough lozenge and began taking off the wrapping. The volume of the TV was not turned up high so the rustling sound of him unwrapping the lozenge drowned out every other sound that was present in the apartment. That made me feel guilty because I knew he only took one of those when his throat hurt really badly and I knew that this time it was all my fault. I should not have asked him all those questions.

For a while I tried to follow the almost depressing show we were watching, but it was just too boring for me and I started feeling tired. I was going to sleep on the couch, but I could not get myself to say that I wanted to sleep because it would practically be the same as kicking Kakashi out of his own living room. So I figured I would just rest my eyes for a bit until Kakashi would decide for himself that it was time to go to bed.

It did not take long for me to doze off and I did not become conscience of what happened around me again until Kakashi suddenly chuckled. Slowly, I opened my eyes. I was so tired that even a simple task like that was nearly impossible for me to accomplish, but when they were finally opened enough for me to start orientating myself of my surroundings, I realized that my head was resting on something that moved along with the chuckling. It was hard, which made me conclude that it was definitely not the armrest that I had tilted down onto. It was Kakashi's shoulder.

Quickly I sat up straight and looked at him with widened eyes. I wanted to say something, but I could not. I just watched him as he stopped chuckling to cough instead. He then looked at me.

"I'm sorry for keeping you up," he said and I could tell from the way that his eyes curved that he was smiling widely.

"I-I didn't m-mean to do that," an apology would not change anything, but I could not focus.

"It's okay. It's late, we should probably go to bed now anyway," he got up on his feet with a bit of difficulty and he looked down at me. "Are you sure that you are okay with sleeping on the couch? You know you can sleep in my bed. I'm fine with sleeping here."

"No, no, you need lots of rest and you need to sleep in a proper bed. I'm okay with sleeping here, but... please don't go to bed just because I fell asleep."

"I'm tired too so don't worry," he gave me a small nod before walking towards his bedroom door, "Goodnight then."

"Good night," I replied quietly, watching him as he disappeared into his bedroom. Staring into space, I wondered what he must have thought about me when I had laid my head on his shoulder. I had to admit that I did not really feel like waking up completely after I had tried lying there. I had been kind of comfortable in that position even though his shoulder was hard to lie on because, in his case, his shoulder was one big muscle.

Sighing, I laid down on the couch, pulling the sheet, which Kakashi had so kindly provided me with earlier that evening, over myself and closed my eyes. That man was so hospitably inclined that I did not even know where to put myself when being in his company. I was always afraid that I would demand more of him than what he wanted to compromise with and that he would simply be too polite to just say no. Sometimes I wondered if he even knew himself where his limits were when it came to generosity.

The need for sleep was overwhelming and I could not keep myself from drifting off every five seconds so at last I gave into my tiredness.

"_What are you gonna do about it, tell your parents? Oh right, I almost forgot - you don't have any parents," a boy said derisively, the other children behind him laughing in that very same tone._

_I opened my eyes, seeing a group of children standing in front of a open closet. Only one child stood with his back turned against the closet, the rest stood facing him. Even though the boy with the high ponytail tried to look brave and fearless, it was still obvious to everyone surrounding him that he was frightened by the situation._

_The boy with the hair so fair that it appeared to be almost white spoke again, "You're a loser. You don't belong here," the orphaned boy grit his teeth and held back the tears that were threatening to appear._

"_Take that back," he whispered angrily, his reaction only causing the group of children to laugh at him. _

"_Loser!" they shouted almost in chorus as the platinum blonde with the plain blue bandana on his head pushed the brunette into the closet, slammed the door close and locked it with the small padlock that already hung on the outside of the door. _

"_Let me out!" the scared boy screamed while trying to kick and punch the door open again. The other children's laughter got louder and the leader of the group stepped forward together with a few others. They stared into the brunette's eyes through all the openings in the grilled door. Everyone gathered and started spitting on the boy who could barely move around inside the traumatic closet._

_I could not bare to watch on, especially not when I began to feel their spit on me, so I turned around and looked to the right. Two boys coming into sight; the struggling boy and his attacker, but this time it was without the attacker's backup. The boy with the bandana was holding a pocket knife, which he pointed towards the other boy. _

"_No, not again," I whispered, closing my eyes and turning 90 degrees to the right. _

_When I opened my eyes, I saw a grown man with yellowish hair who was squatting down beside the same brunette as I had already seen twice before, the only difference being that the boy now had a scare across his nose. _

_They were both smiling and laughing, but it did not last long because suddenly the man rose and walked away from the boy who started crying. The boy tried to run after the yellow haired man, but a huge group of children as well as adults behind him grabbed his thin arms and pulled him back. Soon he was drowning in the crowd and his cries could no longer be heard._

_My eyes wandered over the crowd. My heart was pumping faster by the minute. I could not catch sight of the boy. _

"_Please, stop it," I turned to the right one last time, wishing that I would finally find peace, but I was not that lucky._

_There were a small group of youngsters sitting together in a circle. For some reason they all seemed a little distant. _

_My heart skipped a beat and a lump formed in my throat when a brown haired boy, which I recognized from the other incidents, got up on his feet and walked over to me. He stared up at me for several seconds without saying anything. He looked to be around 13 years old._

_Suddenly, out of the blue, he took my hand, the palm of it facing upwards, and he placed something on it, closing my hand around it. I kept looking at him and his eyes never left mine, not even for a split second._

"_This will take away your sorrow. It'll help you forget," the boy said with a goofy smile on his face, his eyes telling a different story._

_I looked down at my hand and opened it. What I saw made my eyes widen and my head shot right back up, but the boy had already gone back to his friends._

"_Iruka," someone whispered and I turned around on my heels, facing everyone that had taken part in the different incidents, "Iruka," they whispered again as they stretched out their arms towards me. Their walk was zombie like and the expression on their faces were dead and haunting._

_I backed away from them, but then I head someone behind me calling out my name as well. Quickly, I looked over my shoulder. It was the boy and his friends that beckoned me to come up to them._

"_Iruka!" my name was shouted from all sides of me and it felt like my head was going to explode._

"_Leave me alone!" I cried out, but they kept on going._

"_Iruka, Iruka, Iruka, Iruka!"_

"Iruka-san?" I woke up with a jerk and sat up the same moment as my eyes shot open. My breathing was heavy and fast, my heart was pounding wildly in my chest and I was bathed in sweat, "Iruka-san?" the person standing a few meters away from me repeated. I finally recognized the voice.

"What is it, Kakashi-san?" I stood up and tried to shake the bad dream off me before looking around to find Kakashi.

The moon was shining through the windows of the apartment, allowing me to see almost everything clearly when my eyes had gotten used to the darkness, which did not take long. I discovered that Kakashi was standing in the doorway of his bedroom, clinging to the frame of the door. It looked like he was having a hard time breathing.

"I don't... feel so well," he panted as I walked over to him, "I think... I think I'm going to be sick," he placed a hand in front of his mask and gagged.

"Hold in there for a second, I'll find you a bucket," I said quickly and was just about to turn away from him to get one, but unfortunately it was already too late.

I looked away as he emptied his stomach onto the floor, he was probably going to be embarrassed about it later on and I did not think me watching him would make him feel any better.

"I'm... I'm sorry," he managed to say when his stomach stopped forcing his dinner back up again. His right hand was covering his face and I noticed that the surgical mask he had been wearing was lying on the floor all covered in puke.

"You don't have to worry about that, I'll clean it up once we have gotten you back to bed," I grabbed his arm, getting overwhelmed by shock when I felt how hot his skin was, "Kakashi-san are you okay?" I placed one hand on his forehead without asking for permission and discovered that his forehead was burning, just as I had already assumed, "You're feverish," I stated in astonishment, catching him as his legs appeared to be collapsing underneath him.

"I-I'm d-d-dizzy," he stammered and placed his left hand on my shoulder, but he could not stand straight so I had to keep holding onto him. This fever had come very suddenly and I began to fear that he was suffering from something very seriously.

"There something I need to know. Please, try to stand straight," he could not so I figured that I had to press his back against the door frame so that he had something to support him from behind, "Hold onto my shoulders," I demanded. His left hand was already resting on one of my shoulders, but he refused to remove the right hand from his face, "Both hand," his tired eyes sent me a grudgingly look and I breathed out heavily, "I won't look," I stared into his almost frightened eyes and tried to reassure him that I was not lying. When I closed my eyes, almost a minute went by before I felt his other hand on my shoulder.

All I had to do was open my eyes and I would finally see what it was that Kakashi was constantly hiding for everyone, but I could not make myself break the promise that I had made him and besides, I had more important things to do. There was not any time for me thinking what was behind that mask of his.

"Try tilting your head to the sides a couple of times and then look left and right. Tell me if it hurts," a few seconds went by before he answered.

"It does," I was not a doctor, not even close to, so I was in no position to diagnose him, but I knew what these things could be a symptom of and I was not sure if I was ready to risk his life and just let him go back to bed.

"Kakashi-san, I think you need to see a doctor right away. I just need to make sure of something first," I wrapped one arm around his waist, pulled him close and took small step back so now it was me that was pressed against the door frame instead. Kakashi's body felt a little uneasy and the sound he made was literally a sound of surprise, "Tip your head back and forth," he would not have been able to do that properly as long as he had been pressed against the door frame like that, "Does it hurt too?"

"Ye-yeah... a bit," he whispered and I had to stop myself from caressing his back to comfort him. We were just standing so close that it was almost unbearable. Geez, focus Iruka, damn it!

"Okay, I'll take you to the doctor now. I just have to figure out how," Kakashi pushed himself a little away from me, but kept hanging onto my shoulders so he would not fall. I got the hint and removed my hand from his back, crossing my fingers in hope of that he would not drop to the floor as long as he had at least some kind of support.

"What do you think... is wrong with me?" he coughed and panted heavily.

"I'm sure it's nothing, you just need to see one to be on the safe side," many of the symptoms were there, but how the hell could he have caught himself yet another disease? If I was right, which I hopefully was not, he had to be the most unlucky person in the world.

"But... how do we get there?" it was a good question. Neither me nor Kakashi owned a car and even if we did it would not help much since I did not have a drivers license and he was in no condition to drive. But he was not in any condition to walk either even though the doctor from the emergency service's clinic was not far from where Kakashi lived. I had no other choice.

"I guess there's no way around it. I'll have to carry you."

**oOo**

"Hmm... It's not meningitis," Kabuto stated when he was done checking Kakashi.

"Thank God," I breathed out a sigh of relief and sent a smile to Kakashi who tried to smile back with his eyes, but was in too much pain to fulfill it.

"I'm glad that you chose to come here anyway. It's better to be on the safe side," Kabuto poured Kakashi a glass of water and placed a red pill on the table beside him before looking over at me.

"Yeah, that's what I said," I nodded and locked eyes with Kabuto.

"The symptoms are common for his illness and since there's nothing alerting about his temperature, I don't think there's anything to worry about. The pain in his neck is most likely caused due to all those hours he has spent in his bed lately."

"I hadn't even thought about that. I'm really sorry for wasting you time."

"It's okay. He should just take some ibuprofen if the fever gets like this again and he should be perfectly fine," we both looked at Kakashi who was staring at the pill, "If your throat is too sore, I can give you the medicine as a suppository instead," I had to start biting my thumbnail to keep myself from laughing as Kakashi's eyes widened and he shook his head ferociously.

I had gotten Kakashi a new mask before we had left his house and I had not even taken one peek while he had not been wearing it, which made me kind of proud of myself. I figured Kakashi was not going to take the pill as long as we were looking so I made up a way to distract Kabuto long enough for Kakashi to take the pill.

"So, how are your girls doing?" Kabuto's smile grew so wide that it made it look like his mustache was even longer than it actually was. And then he started talking. And talking... And talking... And talking... When he was finally done telling me about his daughters' latest achievements, I helped Kakashi up on his feet and paid Kabuto for his services.

"We were lucky that it was you who was on duty tonight," Kabuto knew that what I meant was that I trusted him a great deal and that I had faith in his judgmental skills.

"It's was nice seeing you too, Iruka-san. Now you better get him back to bed so you can go home and get some rest yourself."

"Oh, it's no problem, I'm living with him," Kabuto raised a brow and me and sent me a weird kind of unsatisfied look, "... at the moment," I added when I realized how wrong it must have sounded to him. He did not seem convinced though.

**oOo**

"Thank you for taking me to the doctor, I feel much better already," Kakashi coughed his way through the sentence as I sat him on the ground after carrying him back home.

"Maybe, but you are far from being well so I think you should sleep on the couch from now on," the couch in the living room was closer to the bathroom, the kitchen and me so even though it was not as comfortable to sleep on a couch as in a real bed, I still thought he was better off sleeping there.

"Where will you sleep then?" he asked and sent me a questioning look.

"I'll just sleep beside the couch so you can easily wake me up if you need anything," a small smile appeared in his eyes and he shook his head lightly.

"You don't have to sleep on the floor, I have a spare mattress," he chuckled, but as always his throat could not take it and he had to stop to cough. I just sent him a smile back and nodded before we made ourselves ready to go back to bed in our new sleeping positions, "By the way, what were you doing when I came in here earlier?" he asked when we had both gotten ourselves comfortable where we had to sleep.

That was where it hit me. Kakashi had touched me and seen me and heard me right after I had woken up from that nightmare. My sweaty body, the panting, my racing heart against his chest, the jerk I had given when he called my name... He must have thought I was pleasuring myself or something!

"I had a bad dream," I said quickly, not making my case any better.

"Oh," that was his only answer, which made me sure that he thought that that was what I had been doing and that he probably did not believe my excuse... Great.

**oOooOooOo**

**Sorry guys, I didn't mean for it to take this long for me to update. But hey, at least it didn't take me as long as last time, right :D?**

**Aah, so how do you like seeing Iruka's picture perfect image of Kakashi crumbling right in front of him xD? And about the last part of this chapter, you know Iruka is an unlucky person and I couldn't let Iruka get all the laughs. Kakashi strikes back, lol!**

**Guess that's all for now? As always, I would love to hear what you think of this chapter^^**

**See ya' next time :D!**


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

When we got to the hospital the day after, Hidan and I were kindly asked to stay in the waiting room as the nurse escorted Kakashi to his examination. Hidan and I sat down beside each other, only a small white table with a bunch of magazines on it separated us.

I had been in a bit of a hurry that day when Hidan had suddenly showed up and told me that he had promised to take Kakashi to the hospital in one of the bigger cities for a check up because Kakashi had not exactly been amiable enough to provide me with that information the day before. So I had to hurry up and help Kakashi with getting dressed and find some breakfast for him and so on before we had to drive to reach the hospital in time for his appointment. Therefore I had not gotten to eat anything myself and neither did I get to brush my teeth, wash up nor brush my hair.

That was the reason why I was wearing my hair in a bun instead of a ponytail that day and it was also the reason why I was sitting with my arms pressed uncomfortably close to my body. Hidan had already let me know that I stunk when we had been sitting in the car although he had not noticed that I was the one who had made the entire car stink. _"Wow, what is that smell? Is it coming from outside? Yuk!" _And that exact remark was the reason why I had been sitting like this ever since we arrived.

Hidan yawned loudly and if it was not because I did not know him all that well, I would have asked him to moderate his behavior when we were together in public. "Man, I'm tired. Why do they even make appointments with patients this early?" he asked and I did not even bother to look at him.

"That's because most people don't consider 11:30 to be early in the morning." I picked up a magazine from the table in between us and pretended like I was reading. It did not appear to be stopping Hidan from bothering me, though. I had to admit that it was not his fault that I was grumpy and that I did not want to speak with him; I did not speak much when I had only just woken up. Especially if I had not slept all that well.

My back was killing me. Why would Kakashi even offer me to sleep on a mattress that was harder than rock when I had already said that I was fine with sleeping on the floor? At least my back would have been spared just a bit more if I had not slept on that tool of torture.

I felt that Hidan was staring at me and it slowly began to tick me off for good. My jaw moved from one side to another in a mildly irritated movement. What was it he wanted?

Finally, I stared back at him without moving my face into the direction of his gaze. When the staring contest had gone on for what felt like more than a minute, I gave up. "What?" I asked in an annoyed tone, the message obviously not getting through to Hidan as he started smiling. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

Hidan crossed his arms over his chest and answered, "I was just wondering why you're always wearing you hair up?"

"And why are you wondering about that all of a sudden?" His question seemed irrelevant and stupid to me, at least while I was still in this mood.

"It wasn't tugged into a ponytail, as it usually is, when I first came this morning."

"Well, I had just gotten out of bed when you came. What did you expect? That I sleep with my hair in a ponytail? Do you have any idea of how uncomfortable that is!" Hidan raised his hands up in front of his face and shook his head slowly with an insecure smile crossing his lips.

"Calm down, I just asked why you prefer having it in a ponytail. That's all, geez!" I let my chin drop to my chest and looked down at the magazine again with a loud sigh escaping my lips.

"I'm sorry, Hidan-san, I didn't mean to snap at you. I just got out of bed on the wrong side this morning."

"Don't worry, I didn't take it personally. But why is it you always wear your hair in a ponytail?" I flipped through the magazine while trying to think of an answer for his question. Why did I wear it like that? I did not think that there was actually a reason for it, I just did.

"Old habit. I'm not very good with changes," I replied flatly. Hidan just made a small 'hm' sound in the back of his throat and leaned back in his seat.

Kakashi did not return until almost an hour later and Hidan and I had sat in complete silence ever since the conversation about my hair. I had not even noticed what he had been doing, I just sat with the same magazine in my hands while sitting in my own thoughts.

I was wondering what the next couple of days would be like and if Kakashi and I would even have anything to talk about. We had not really talked before. Sure, we had started off talking when being on breaks, smoking cigarettes together, but it was not anything out of the ordinary that we spoke about. Even though I hated to admit it, I did not really know anything about him. I did not know which town he had lived in before moving to my village or what he used to work with and stuff like that. The question that bothered me the most, though, was why he was wearing that damn mask.

The doctor and Kakashi walked up to us, interrupting my perfect flow of thoughts.

"So far it looks like your spleen and liver are doing fine. We'll call you with the final results later on," said the tanned doctor, who's hair was hidden beneath a tight fitting, light blue surgeon cap, and sent Kakashi a wide smile.

"Okay, that sounds great." Kakashi's voice had gotten worse and it was almost impossible to make out what it was that he was saying.

"Oh, and you should gargle salt water once in a while. It's good for your throat as long as it's sore." Kakashi nodded and smiled back at the doctor with his eyes. There was something strange about this doctor. Something about the way he talked and moved, but I could not really put a finger on what exactly it was he was doing.

"Thanks for everything, doc." They shook hands and they both looked over at us. The doctor seemed to be focusing on Hidan, for some unknown reason.

"I'm sorry, b-but are you interested in becoming a blood donor?" I looked over at Hidan whose head finally bounced up from its lazy position. The doctor obviously had not noticed that he had been asleep, "Oh, I-I'm sorry, I didn't know you were sleeping," he apologized when Hidan looked around confusedly and he did not answer until he had used a couple of seconds to orientate himself about the situation.

"I'm sorry, what?" The doctor scratched the back of his neck carefully and pointed at the blood donor brochure Hidan was holding, "This?" he said and waved the brochure around lightly, "I was just reading. I don't really know anything about it."

The doctor glanced up at a clock that hung inside the waiting room before looking back down at Hidan. "If you're interested, I-I could tell you a little about it now?" he stammered. The doctor reminded me of someone and so did his nervous behavior, but who? And why was he even stammering? He was not just a second before when talking to Kakashi.

"Uhm, sure... Do you mind waiting a little longer?" both he and the doctor looked shiftily at Kakashi and me and we shrugged and nodded in sync. They then went out of the waiting room together, leaving us looking in the direction they walked off to.

When Kakashi turned back towards me, he sat down on the chair, which Hidan had been sitting on and craned his neck to look at the magazine I was holding. "What are you reading?" he asked with that hoarse voice he could not get rid of.

I did not know what it was I had pretended to be reading and I just threw the open magazine onto the table so he could take a look at it himself. He took it and leaned forward in his seat, placing both his elbows on his thighs. He put a finger in between the pages I had sat with for the past hour and he turned the magazine to look at the cover.

"_Greek – Your guide to healthy and safe sex,_" Kakashi read out loud, a small giggle rattling from his throat. "That should be interesting."

I wanted to literally facepalm myself for choosing to grab that magazine out of all the magazines that had been available to me. I could not stop my cheeks from turning a slight red even though Kakashi did not seem to be mocking me because of my choice.

He flipped open the magazine again at the same page where he had put his finger as a book mark and started reading. I looked up at the clock with a loud sigh, my legs jumping up and down in an impatient pace. I sure did not hope that this was going to take much longer.

Suddenly, I froze. Kakashi was staring at me out of the corner of his eyes and he had a weird look on his face. I too was looking at him from the corner of my eyes, but he did not seem to notice. What was wrong, why was he staring at me? Was it something that I had done?

Quickly, I led my hands behind my head and checked if my bun of hair was still in place. Nothing strange appeared to be happening up there. Then I looked down at myself. I had all my clothes on and there were not any stains or buttons that were buttoned wrong so I just could not figure out why he kept on staring like that.

Was it because I was smelling? I pulled my arms closer to my body, hoping that it was not my body odour that made him send me those looks.

Luckily, the doctor and Hidan chose to appear when the situation could not get anymore tense.

"Thank you, Kakuzu-Hakase. I'll definitely consider this blood donor thing." Kakashi got up from his seat as Hidan spoke and he dropped the magazine onto the table. I noticed that the magazine was open and that it was still on the page which Kakashi had read after me. I tilted my body a little to the side and cocked my head so that I could read the article.

"I'm glad to hear that. Make sure to ask for me if you decide to do it." As the three of them were saying their polite and formal goodbyes, I sat in terror, not being able to read on after just the first few sentences. The article was about how to safely pleasure someone when having anal intercourse... This was a men's magazine... a magazine for _gay _men! Kami, why me? What did I do to deserve this? Please, just kill me already!

**oOo**

After we got home, it was time for me to go to work. The hours there did not feel as long as they usually did, but I still felt tired when I finally got back to Kakashi's place.

Kakashi was lying on the couch when I walked in, doing nothing out of the ordinary. It appeared like he was watching some movie, but it did not really look like it was his cup of tea. The hand closest to the couch was placed in his greasy hair to support his heavy head. He had not taken a shower for as long as I had been there and my guess was that he had not even taken one the days before I came either.

I locked the front door and walked over by him with a plastic bag of groceries in each hand to see what it was he was watching. I did not recognize the movie and decided that it was not anything for me.

Looking down at him, I was confronted with his greasy hair once again. I gulped and I could not hold myself back any longer, I was not able to prevent the words from escaping my mouth. "Don't you think it's time for a shower?" Kami, how could I be so rude? And it was not just anybody that I was in the middle of offending. It was Kakashi. Hatake freaking Kakashi! My impoliteness made me wonder if it was bad karma that lately had kept stabbing me in the back whenever I was not prepared for it.

"Huh, why? Do I smell?" he asked, lifting one arm to take a sniff, the other hand never leaving its spot in that silvery, messy nest he had on top of his head.

"No. No, it's not that. I just thought maybe a shower would be stimulating?" I was not sure if that would make me sound less rude.

"Nah, I don't really feel like it right now. Besides, I'm too tired. I would probably be out of breath before I even got to the shampoo part." Yeah, we cannot have that, now can we? What the hell does a man have to do to get another man to take a bath? "Unless of course you would volunteer to help me?" he said and looked up at me for the first time.

I was in shock. No, that was actually an understatement. Was he joking or did he really mean that? It was not always easy to tell when he did not mean what he said because he did not add that sarcastic tone like normal people did when joking. It was freaking annoying. How was I supposed to react to something like that? Was he testing me?

"Uhm..." I started carefully, "I'm not sure that I would be comfortable with doing that," I tried to sound confident as I walked to the kitchen to store the groceries I had bought. I figured leaving the conversation at that was for the better sake. I did not need to get myself into another embarrassing and easily misinterpret-able situation. It did not looked like I was going to have any luck with getting Kakashi to shower anyway. Maybe I would have to be even ruder than I had been just to get him to consider it.

As I placed some of the groceries on the top shelf of the food cupboard, I was reminded of my sore back and I doubled up with pain, the can I had placed on the shelf balancing on the edge of it.

"Damn," I whispered, placing one hand on my back as I stood up straight again. The pain could not just be from sleeping on that mattress. Carrying Kakashi to and back from the emergency doctor had been harder on me than I had first thought. He was a heavy man - not that he was fat - it was his big muscles and height, which made him difficult to carry for someone like me who was not nearly as strong as him.

When I was done unpacking the groceries, I made us both some green tea and did not go back to the living room until I had two cups of fuming tea in my hands, Kakashi's cup was of course made out of disposable plastic.

Kakashi watched as I carefully walked over to the coffee table by the couch, slowly so I would not spill any of the tea..

"Here you go," I said as I placed the tea in front of him.

"Thank you." His sore throat made it sound like he was hissing at me, but I could tell that he was not from the thankful look on his face.

"I thought this would be good for your throat. By the way, I noticed that you haven't touched the ice cream I've brought you yet, how come? Don't you like vanilla?"

"No, it's not that. It's just that ice cream isn't exactly healthy for you."

"Maybe not, but it'll make your throat hurt less."

"I'll just settle with the tea."

"Since when did you become all crazy about being healthy? Don't you drink alcohol like every weekend or something?"

He chuckled without sound, "I've always liked a good party. Alcohol is my weak spot when it comes to being healthy. But when I don't drink, I try to stay healthy and I can't drink anything anyway for the next couple of months so I might as well stay completely healthy." It should have been obvious to me that he ate healthy food since he was pretty fit, but it just did not seem logical to me to try and be healthy when you drank as much as he did. Well, at least he was not allowed to drink for a while and in a way it did not really surprise me that that was about the only fact that he could remember about his illness.

"I still don't think it would hurt to just eat a little once in a while."

"It wouldn't if I was allowed to exercise, but the doctor said that if I strained my body by lifting weights and such, I would risk bursting my spleen or something like that."

"I can see why you don't find that thought very flattering." I had never really seen Kakashi as someone who was obsessed with his body. I had actually not even considered that he had to work out and eat right to get the kind of body he had. Apparently, I just assumed he was born with it.

An angel passed the living room, at least that was what you would think when we suddenly went dead silent. I could not stop thinking about the fact that I did not really know Kakashi all that well, especially not when he was the only one I was close to considering my friend. Now the thought of it began to prey on my mind. I wanted to get to know him better, but how would I do that? Should I ask him something? In that case, where did the limit go to what was appropriate for me to ask?

I ended up just blurting out the first thing that came to my mind, the question being related to pretty much the only thing we had in common. Work. "What were you doing before the supermarket?"

Kakashi raised a brow at me. "What, you mean like work?" I nodded and he continued, "I was a fitness trainer."

"Really?" I sounded a little too surprised and it looked like Kakashi took it as an insult. "I mean, it's not like it isn't obvious when I look at you. You're very fit and manly and masculine and handsome... Wait... No, that didn't come out right!" his expression then turned into an awkward smile. Half of him seemed praised while the other half appeared rather disgusted. I flushed; when did I learn not to speak my mind?

"Thanks, I guess," he laughed carefully, "Well, I was a dietician as well, tough. Not very _manly_ or _masculine_. It's actually kind of embarrassing, but I needed the money." Kakashi looked away from me and started coughing behind the white mask, which was probably already filled with all sorts of germs by now. I could not tell if he was trying to mock me.

None of us said anything for a minute or two, we only sat beside each other, taking a sip of our tea occasionally. So far, there had been a lot of silence between me and whoever I had been with throughout the whole day. But then Kakashi spoke.

"I think it's your turn to tell me something about yourself, like, how did you get that scar?" He pointed at the scar I had across my nose. Either he was reading my mind or else we were just thinking alike. Did he really want to get to know me too? The question did not thrill me, though. The answer to it was kind of embarrassing and I did not like to look back at my childhood memories.

"This?" I too pointed at my scar. "I was in a fight," I replied simply. Kakashi did not look satisfied with my short answer.

"Must have been a tough fight when that was the outcome. What happened?" I resisted the urge of biting my lower lip to keep myself from speaking. He probably would not stop asking further into it until I had given him a more detailed answer. I could tell him the truth, right? It was not like he was going to tell anyone else or laugh. It was not my entire childhood he was asking me about. I could just give him a quick summary.

"I didn't exactly hit it off with this one boy from school. So... one day he really pissed me off and when I took a shot at him, he accidentally cut me with his pocket knife in self-defense." I bended the truth a little at the last minute. I just wanted Kakashi to get off my back with this. The subject made me feel uncomfortable.

"Wow... Wasn't it a little drastic to draw a knife at you?" I shrugged my shoulders and thought that there was not any need for a verbal answer to that.

In an attempt to leave the conversation behind, I drank the last of my tea and said, "I'm hungry, I'm gonna make us dinner now," Kakashi just watched me as I got up and took both of our empty cups and brought them out to the kitchen.

I had a strange feeling in my stomach. Something was slowly changing in our relationship. We did not act towards each other as we usually did. We were more open and straightforward. I was not as stammering and unsure of myself around him any more and Kakashi seemed to be removing a part of that polite mask he constantly wore. But was this change in our relationship a good thing?

We ate dinner late that evening and when I was finally done with washing the dishes, Kakashi relapsed. I gave him some ibuprofen for the fever and wished that it was not going to repeat itself every night until he had recovered completely. I felt sorry for him and I had to strain myself so I would not start acting like some mother hen towards him.

When I had practically "put him to bed," I got myself ready for bed as well. Kakashi refused to sleep in anything else than his loose, gray jogging pants even though I told him that he would get rid of his cold sooner if he made sure to keep himself warm at night, but the fever made it almost impossible for him to wear any clothes at all.

I, on the other hand, could not get myself to sleep shirtless so I put on a white t-shirt and my pajamas pants before brushing my teeth, walking back into the living room where I got under my duvet quickly.

The coffee table was between me and Kakashi, but because I lay so low compared to him, I was able to look up at him without the table being in my field of vision. He was wearing his mask even when sleeping. I could not take this for much longer, I needed to know what was under that mask.

"Why are you wearing that mask?" Kakashi was lying on his back, but turned his head to the side to look at me when I spoke. Was it Kakashi that gave me these rude tendencies even though he was not very rude himself? Or was this just my actual self? I would not be able to tell since before Kakashi I had not interacted with anyone since I was a child.

"Because I don't wanna infect you," he said, sending me his signature eye smile. So he was going to play it like that. Fine by me.

"I don't care. Wouldn't it be nicer without it?" I bet it got all hot and sweaty behind it.

"Maybe, but I don't mind." We lay in silence for a few minutes. He was making up excuses so he would not have to answer my actual question. The only way around it was to ask him directly so he could not avoid answering.

"Kakashi-san?"

"Mmm?"

"I..." I was hesitating all of a sudden. Would it really be a good idea for me to ask? Carefully, I continued, "If you don't mind me asking, why are you always covering your face?"

"Huh?" Now he was playing dump, but I guess I kind of understood why since it appeared like he had a big problem with it. I just wanted to know why.

At the end of the day, I could not go through with the rude straightforwardness. I was purposely putting him in an awkward position. It was not my style so even though I knew that saying anything further would only give him an excuse not to answer, I chose to add, "I mean, you don't have to answer if you don't want to." He of course took me up on that.

"It's a long story, I'll tell you some other day." He turned so he faced the backrest of the couch instead of me. I was kind of disappointed even though I had not really believed that it would be that easy for me to find out what he was keeping from everyone.

"Oh, okay." I guess I just had to bear with him. Whatever his problem was, it had to be something that was really bothering him. I had never seen anyone who did so many things just to keep people from seeing something you found embarrassing. I figured it was better to drop it, but if he was going to keep it from me for much longer, I could not promise that I would not rip the mask off in his sleep.

**oOooOooOo**

**I admit it! This is far from being one of the best chapters I've made so far. You might even say that it's one of the worst -_-' But I tried doing the best I could at the moment. I don't know if I'm in lack of inspiration or if my language just keeps getting worse and worse. Blah... at least it's done now and hopefully you can see that the story making progress even though it might not appear like that to everyone. **

**By the way, what just happened? We are already at chapter 20! My, my... how time flies when you are in good company^^...**

**And I just want to note that the story is not far now from hitting 100 reviews. Which means the lucky reviewer will get a one shot :D!  
>(Still owe Mr. Nancy one, but she won't give me the specifics... Damn you, girl xD! May you be forever alone! - in-house joke, sorry ^^'!)<strong>

**Oh well, hit me with a review and tell me what you think. At least I'll know what to do better next time!**

**So long ^^!**


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

I felt kind of strange when being at work that day. It all started with Tenzou asking me if I knew anything about Kakashi and his condition. To that I had answered that I was taking care of him at the moment and that he was slowly starting to get better, but that he should not expect him to come back to work anytime soon. Tenzou knew that I was his only possible connection to Kakashi of all the employees since he had seen us speaking together before when being on breaks. I found it weird that he had asked me about Kakashi, but it was not really that that bothered me, though, it was how everyone else acted throughout the rest of the day.

My co-workers had been giving me these weird looks all morning, but neither of them seemed to want to approach me so I had no idea what all those long stares were for. Even some of the customers had been queer around me when I had sat behind the desk and no one really contacted me if they needed help. They all went to Shikamaru instead or someone else if he was not available.

When I got off at 12:00 o'clock, the things that had happened – or should I say the things that had not happened – at work kept on bothering me. Even when I returned to Kakashi's place, I couldn't seem to shake the thought of it away. What was they were staring at? Was it all just my imagination? At least it would make more sense if it was so. It usually only took one look from one human being to make me feel like I was the center of Earth since I was not used to getting much attention from any of the customers or my co-workers for that matter.

It was probably just me after all. I had dealt with paranoia all of my life and I was getting pretty used to it. I knew just how to get my mind off things... If your answer is clean, then yes, you are correct. I was going to clean Kakashi's entire apartment. He would not be able to make much of a distraction for me anyway since he was taking a nap on the couch.

I began my cleaning with opening all the windows in his apartment so we could get some fresh air in there. It was not cold outside, but it was a little windy so after just a short while, Kakashi started shivering in his sleep. The poor idiot had not covered himself with his duvet and he was just lying there shirtless as he had done most of the time during my "visit." It seemed like he was freezing so I took his duvet, which hung over the backrest of the couch, and placed it over him. At least now I would not feel bad for getting rid of the stuffiness that had taken over his entire apartment lately.

I quickly figured that it was probably smartest to save the vacuum cleaning for last since I did not want to arouse Kakashi. So first I tidied up the living room and kitchen. When there was finally orderly enough for me to actually clean the objects in the rooms, I found a cloth and started dusting off everything. First the living room, then the kitchen. It did not take me long to remove the dust from those two rooms, but when I was done, I found myself standing in front of Kakashi's bedroom door.

_Iruka, you cannot go in there. A bedroom is one of the most private rooms of a house!_ I told myself, but of course I would not listen to the more sensible side of my brain. A part of me wanted to get in there and clean because cleaning was just a fetish of mine and I could not stop myself when I had first started. Everything needed to be clean or else I would not be able to sleep properly at night. But a part of me, the snoopy part, also wanted to check out if he had any exciting stuff in there.

I had only been in his bedroom once and it had been dark most of the time so I had not been able to take a good look around yet. But now was my chance. Kakashi was asleep and his bedroom stood unguarded, almost begging for me to enter. When I could not hold myself back anymore, I tiptoed inside, crossing a boarder I was not really allowed to cross without permission if I had to be ethically correct. I had an excuse for being there, at least, even if it was not a good one.

Once I had gotten inside, I went on with the cleaning, carefully examining everything that I dusted off. There did not appear to be anything of my interest in there, not until I outdid myself, getting down on all four and looking under his bed.

It was very dusty under there, you could easily tell that Kakashi did not make a _forever alone _party out of cleaning like I did. But what I found under the bed got me too curious for me to keep my hands for myself. I pulled out an open, medium sized cardboard box and took a look inside without thinking any further about what I was about to do. This was Kakashi's private life that I was carelessly stomping across because of my own selfish and prying reasons.

The box was filled with books. At first, that kind of surprised me. Kakashi did not seem like the reading type, but once I discovered that they were all rated mature, I put two and two together. I just did not understand one thing; why was not the cover looking like something that was supposed to catch the attention of horny men? Books like these usually had a cover like that, did they not? These were orange, green and blue and decent dressed men and women embellished the front of the books.

Maybe the content was not as smutty as I had first thought?

With a positive attitude towards the books, I picked one up and flipped it open. Okay, now I had to admit that I had been completely wrong when actually thinking that Kakashi could be a person who read decorous porn. This was not nice at all. It was dirty, no, just plain smutty and perverse. And the pictures. What the hell was that couple even doing in that position?

I flipped the book around to try and find out how the portrayed intercourse was supposed to function, but I could not figure it out. How was he supposed to reach hers... with his... when he stood like that? I knew Kama Sutra was supposed to be complicated, but could this even be considered Kama Sutra or was it a whole new style that only contortionists and ballet practitioners where able to perform?

I wondered if Kakashi had ever tried any of that himself before?

"Iruka-san, why didn't you wake m..." I looked over my shoulder quickly, seeing Kakashi standing right behind me. I could tell that his mouth was wide open behind the surgical mask. He had an almost terrified look in his eyes. "W-what are you doing?" he screamed, to the best of his ability, in horror, his whole face turning completely red.

I had definitely been caught with my hand in the cookie jar. What should I do? No matter what I said or did, he would know that I had been snooping around in his room. Would it be best to come up with an excuse or pretend like I had not done anything wrong?

"Is this stuff even legal in Japan?" I laughed, trying to act cool while beaming him a wide smile. My hands slowly began to become sweaty. I had no idea of how he was going to react.

"W-Well..." he stammered, but shook his head, presumably changing his mind on what to answer. "What were you even doing under my bed?"

I came up with an answer quickly, but before saying anything, I turned around, pretending to read his filthy porn while waving the wet cloth around above my head. "What does it look like I'm doing? Your house must be paradise for dust mites."

"Hey, don't read it!" he said, walking up close behind me and snatching the book from my hand. "It's private!" I turned around and raised one brow at him. I could not really tell if his face was red due to embarrassment or if he was furious. I wanted to gulp, but I was afraid that he would notice. I could not shift into another character now, it was too late.

"Geez, sorry. Didn't mean to embarrass you." Kakashi seemed surprised to the fact that I had just said that aloud.

"I'm not embarrassed," he muttered under his breath and looked away from my gaze, making it obvious to me that his flushed cheeks, at least the part of them that I could see, surely were caused by embarrassment.

He walked past me, his eyes fixed on the cupboard box. Squatting, he dropped the book back into the box and pushed it under his bed again.

"Thank you for cleaning," he said and trudged out of the room without another word. I was not sure of what kind of impact this incident would have on our relationship. It bugged me a little that he had caught me looking through his stuff when I had just started to get the feeling that we were both more comfortable around each other than before. All the jokes and rude comments created a kind of friendly atmosphere.

I figured Kakashi would want to be alone for a while so I finished dusting off everything in his room before walking back into the living room just to discover that Kakashi had jumped back under his duvet. Did it really bother him that much that I had found out about that little "hobby" of his? I could not help myself from thinking that it could be fun to make a joke out of it, but I was not entirely sure yet if that would be such a bright idea.

It took me a few hours to clean the whole apartment, including the bathroom. Gosh, Kakashi's bathroom had nearly been worse looking and smelling than a boy's comfort station. But now that it had been under my care, it was not all that bad looking or smelling anymore, if I had to say so myself.

Kakashi did not do much that day besides from sulking in front of the television, although he pretended like the earlier happening did not bother him. His poker face was not good enough to hide that, though.

When he finally went to the bathroom to get himself ready for bed, I stood in the middle of the living room, being in two minds about whether or not to pull a prank on him. I looked at the door leading to his bedroom, smirking at the thought of my own viciousness.

10 minutes after, Kakashi came back into the living room, finding me lying on the mattress on my belly with a book on my pillow.

"What are you reading?" he asked as he walked over by me and stooped to read along. I glanced up at him over the edge of my reading glasses, he was turning red again. "I-Iruka-san! I told you not to-" He was just about to rip the book out of my hands when he started coughing uncontrollably.

He kept on coughing for a long time and he ended up having to place his hands on his thighs so he would stand more steady.

I chuckled and tried to come with a smart remark. "If you keep on coughing like that, you'll end up-" Kakashi beat me to it when he suddenly started gagging, though this time I was prepared for it. Quickly, I got up from my bed, grabbed the bucket I had placed beside the couch already the first night and handed it to Kakashi, who pulled down his mask immediately and threw up into the bucket. I looked the other way as soon as he had led his hand towards his mask. I desperately wanted to see what was under it, but something still kept me from taking advantage of the ill man.

When I figured he was done puking, I turned my attention towards him again. He stood with his back turned against me. He did not trust me as much as I thought he did after all. It hurt a little, but I guess I could understand that he was just being careful not to reveal his secret.

"Let me take that," I said and took the bucket from him. He covered his face with one hand.

"Thanks," he muttered into his hand, which muffled his voice. I went to the bathroom where I flushed the vomit down the toilet and cleaned the bucket before walking out again so that Kakashi could go inside and brush his teeth without having to worry if I was looking at him or not.

I placed the bucket beside the couch again and took my cell phone that lay on the coffee table to check the clock. It was around the time where Kakashi's condition usually got worse. I sighed and put down my phone on the table._ I might as well get ready for it,_ I thought to myself as I went into the kitchen to get Kakashi some Ibuprofen and a glass of water, but as I stood there, I suddenly got the urge for hot chocolate.

Kakashi had already returned from the bathroom when I came back with both my hands full. I gave him one of the cups of hot chocolate. "Here's something for your throat," I said and placed the medicine, the glass of water and my own cup of chocolate on the table. "But remember to drink the water too. It might counteract your night sweats." Kakashi nodded and lowered the cup to his lap. It was probably still too hot for him to drink and it could just end up doing more damage than good to his sensitive throat.

I took the book that still lay on my pillow before sitting beside Kakashi on the couch. He glared at me, but I pretended not to notice. Luckily, he seemed to have calmed down.

"Why are you even reading it?" he asked irritably and I answered without looking at him.

"It's actually pretty interesting... And I like the pictures," I teased and to my amusement, it was just the right button to push.

Kakashi snorted, "Did you ever consider what I do when reading those?" I knew he was just trying to gross me out so I would not want to steal his books again, but since I saw right through him, I just played along.

"I have a pretty good idea. But, hey, aren't we both men?" I flashed him a smile resembling one of Hidan's confident and infamous teeth-smiles. My attitude and answering back did not seem to thrill him at all. He was getting desperate.

"Just be happy that I'm too ill to even think of doing it while you're here."

"You don't suppose that I'm gonna do it for you, are you?" Kakashi's eyes widened and he leaned a bit away from me.

"What?... No!" he exclaimed, sounding almost fearful.

"Good 'cause I'm not. Who knows, maybe I'll end up borrowing one of your books and take it with me the next time I go to the bathroom." At that moment, I knew I had won. Who is looking all grossed out now, huh, Kakashi?

But all of a sudden, Kakashi said something I had not seen coming. "Why would you do that? You're not into that kind of stuff anyway." I stared at him for a short moment. Was he on to me? What exactly was it that he was referring to?

"What do you mean?" I asked carefully, not to give myself away.

"I think you know what I mean," he could not look me in the eyes.

"No, I don't." I was not even sure if I actually wanted to hear what it was he was thinking about me.

"You know... My books involve men and women... together."

"Yeah, so what?" My body was beginning to tense up. I had a feeling that I knew where the conversation was headed, but I could not let my guard down or start acting differently. I tried to laugh it off.

"It's straight porn," his fingers started playing with the cup in his hands nervously.

"Just what are you implying?"

"Nothing," he said quickly. "Just forget it."

"No, tell me!" Now I was the one getting frustrated.

"I'm sorry!" he shouted as loudly as his lungs and throat allowed him. "I just thought you were gay after seeing you with Hidan!"

"Why would you think that I'm... Wait, what?" What was he talking about? Had he seen me with Hidan? But we had been in his room and the door was closed and...

"That night at Hidan's party, me and some other guy went to find Hidan after you had left me hanging at the pool, but when we finally found him you were there too and you two were all over each other..." Kakashi paused. That feeling of being watched had not been for nothing that night after all. So Kakashi and some guy had been watching us apparently. Well... This was awkward. Neither of us dared to look at each other. I was too stunned to speak. I just could not believe that he had seen us. "Besides, you've sent me all these mixed signals the last couple of days. What was I supposed to think?"

I closed the book and placed it in my lap with my hands on top of it. Those things he talked about was all accidents, I would be able to explain my way out of them. But Hidan. How was I supposed to explain my way out of that one?

An awkward silence fell upon us once again. None of us said anything for a long while. We both seemed to have switched into some kind of standby mode.

Kakashi slid off one of the strings that was holding his mask up and held it out to the side facing towards me, like he had done it whenever we drank tea together, so I was not able to see his face while he sipped of his cocoa. The slurping sound he made only made the situation even more awkward.

He put his mask back on. I fidgeted with my fingers, avoiding Kakashi's eyes that tried to make contact with mine when I stated, "I'm not _gay_," stressing the last word.

"I just thought-"

I cut him off quickly. "I'm not." I did not feel any need to clarify the statement. I could understand why he assumed that I was playing for the wrong team, but it was not true and therefore I could not have him think that. At least I did not think it was true... Okay, maybe a little... No. No I was not gay... Not yet. Damn, I was confusing myself! Why did Kakashi have to sit there and look so innocent and guilty at the same time? He was messing with my head!

I took the book from my lap and finally let my eyes meet with Kakashi's.

"So, how did you get your hands on books like this one?" My question made an unnatural turn in the conversation, but I figured we would not be able to move on until one of us manned himself up and changed the subject.

"Huh? Uhm... I-I know this guy who imports them to Japan from other countries that are allowed to publish this stuff... I could get one for you if you like?" I found the question rather odd. Especially since he had just accused me of being gay. Well, he had sounded rather unsure of himself when asking. Though his explanation did indeed answer a lot of questions that I had raised because of the books. The word _import_ explained why it was all written in English and I had a feeling that I now knew what he had been doing outside the laundromat that day when he had received a suspicious package. Judging by the size and shape of the package, it could easily have been a book that he had gotten from the mysterious man.

"No, thank you, I think I'm good here," I said and opened the book again. "So, what's your favorite scene in this one?" It felt very weird to ask such a question and Kakashi seemed to think so too, but he leaned closer and began to turn pages nevertheless.

**oOo**

I woke up to the sound of chirping birds and Kakashi snoring. I had a slight headache and I had a feeling of not knowing where I was. Slowly, I tried to sit up, but something prevented me from it. When looking down at myself, I discovered that I was not lying on my mattress, but on the couch. My legs were pulled up close to my chest and Kakashi lay behind me with his head on my hip, one hand resting on my leg and his legs dangling from the edge of the couch that obviously was not big or long enough for two men to lie on it at the same time.

When had I fallen asleep? The last thing I remembered was Kakashi and me sitting together, reading that disgusting book of his. I had noticed that Kakashi's other hand, which lay in between my legs, was still holding onto the book even though it was hovering above the couch, but I still did not remember falling asleep.

Kakashi grunted, dropped the book on the floor and pressed my leg against his chest when I tried to move away from him. He probably thought that I was Anko.

I paused and took some time to study his sleeping form. It was a cliché way of thinking, but Kakashi did look peaceful when lying there like that. There were only a few signs of slight movement under his eyelids and it looked like his lower face was twitching behind the mask. He was probably dreaming.

Suddenly, it started raining, the force of the rain drops hitting the windows of the house gradually increasing. I did not move out of the spot for a minute or two, only sat there in that uncomfortable position, watching the calming yet exhilarating shower.

I looked down at Kakashi again, he was still clinging to my now numb leg, the heat generating from his chest warmed my calf. It was a little cold that morning so I was happy that Kakashi had somehow managed to get himself tangled up in his duvet.

When craning my neck, I was able to look at the almost transparent plastic cup Kakashi had drunken cocoa of the day before. He had not drunken much of it and I figured it had something to do with his obsession of being healthy. He had probably only consumed some of it to be polite. Coming to think about it, I had not even asked or considered if he wanted some. I just made another cup, automatically assuming that he would want some as well.

His condition must have been improving since the cup of cocoa was not the only thing still left standing on the table. The pill and water were there too.

I figured it was time for me to get up because I would not want Kakashi to wake up in this position. He would probably misinterpret it. So I grabbed the hand that was lying on my leg in order to remove it, but as soon as I attempted to swing my legs over the edge of the couch, Kakashi started moving around, opening his eyes soon after. The first thought that ran through my mind when Kakashi's eyes locked with mine was, _gosh, he looks cute when waking up_, but reality soon struck me and I realized that I was staring at him, which seemed to make him freak out on the inside.

His eyes glided down my arm and did not stop until he reached the end of it. We were practically holding hands.

Quickly, I pulled my hand away from his and we both sat up with a jerk, our cheeks blushing within a few seconds. I imagined our reactions looking anime-like, which was a funny thought, just not when being in the actual situation yourself.

We sat silent for a long time, the only thing slightly breaking the silence being the heavy rain that was pouring down outside the apartment.

**oOooOooOo**

**New chapter! Yay or nay :o?**

**I'm so happy that it didn't take me forever to update this again, hopefully you're happy about it too^^ **

**I don't really have anything to say this time so I guess all there's really left to say is: I hope you enjoyed it! It'll be awesome if you would tell me what you think of it :D!**

**See ya' next time!**


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

"_Come on, take it." My hand was stretched out towards Anko and Kakashi that stood in the doorway._

"_No, I won't take your money," Kakashi stated and chuckled lightly. _

"_I've stayed here for a week, I'm not gonna leave without paying at least something for rent." Kakashi shook his head. I was being persistent. The argument had been going on for almost 5 minutes and we had not gotten anywhere with it yet._

"_Iruka-san, he's not gonna take your money and you know it. You've done more than enough for both of us already." Anko smiled, laid her hand on top of mine and pushed it down. "Thank you for everything. I appreciate your help very much." _

"_But-"_

"_No buts. You'll be late for work if you don't leave now. From now on, I'll take care of Kakashi."_

The conversation from earlier that day played through my mind over and over again.

"_I'll see you later, Iruka."_

That was how the conversation between the three of us had ended. To some it might seem like an ordinary goodbye, but I had noticed something unusual – at least unusual to my culture.

"_... Iruka." _The last part rushed through my mind once again.

_Iruka, _that was the final word Kakashi had spoken when a week of care taking was over. Anko had returned as planned and to begin with I had actually thought that a week would be a long time to spent with the same person, but it was not. If Anko had asked me to take care of him for yet another week, it would not really have been a problem with me. I did not remember the last time where I had had as much fun as I had had the past week nor did I remember feeling as appreciated.

"_See ya'," _I could not get myself to add his name. He had used my name without a honorific. That was something he only did with his closest friends and his girlfriend. But... What did that mean? Was it a mistake or was it his way of showing me that I was finally within his trusted circle? Could I truly call myself his _friend _now?

I had used most of the morning wondering about that. It was such a small thing. How could the lack of a small monosyllabic word like _-san _change the entire meaning of a sentence? I had never really cared about the importance of honorifics, it was just something that I used without thinking. But after meeting Kakashi, the meaning of them had changed a great deal to me.

"_I'll see you later, Iruka."_ It was a sentence of acceptance, was it not? At least the symbolic meaning behind it.

While my relationship with Kakashi seemed to be progressing, the relationship between my co-workers and customers appeared to be aggravating. No one even deigned to look at me anymore.

I sighed loudly. My mind was a mess and I could not think straight. I needed something to distract me for a moment, just something that would make me forget everything for at least a few minutes. I gazed in the direction of one of the cash registers, seeing the diversity of tobacco behind the desk. My break was close and I figured Tenzou would not mind if I anticipated it a little.

**oOo**

I stood with my back pressed against the brick wall, right beside the backdoor, with a lit cigarette in my hand. The burning sensation in my throat when I inhaled told me that it had been a long time since I had had one of those. I was not really used to it anymore.

The view of the park was pretty good from where I was standing. It was a very quiet day and there were only a few people visiting the park this midday. The most noticeable of them were a family on picnic. The woman and man sat together with a young girl on a red and white check patterned blanket while two boys, who seemed younger than the girl, were playing a game of tag. I had never played that myself, only watched my classmates do it, but I thought - even as a grown up – that the game looked like a lot of fun.

I took in a long drag of the smoke and exhaled after letting it spread inside of my lungs for a short while. This really did help calming my mind and nerves. It did not taste particularly good, but you got used to the taste eventually. Pretty stupid to get yourself addicted to something that you did not even find all that enjoyable to start with. For me, at the moment, it only helped me relax, which was rather odd actually. How can something that makes your heart race like crazy make you feel calm at the same time?

"Are you serious?" someone approaching the open backdoor said.

"Indeed. The last thing I heard was that he moved in with that guy," the man was whispering and I figured whatever they were talking about was something that I was not supposed to hear so I took a few steps away from the door along the wall so they would not be able to see me as long as they stayed inside. Still, I could not help myself from listening in on their conversation.

"You're kidding me, right? How do you even know that the rumors are true?" The first one speaking sounded like Uzuki Yugao while the other who was providing Yugao with some kind of information was most likely to be Gekko Hayate. Whatever they were talking about, it appeared to be private. I was not always one to pry in people's personal life, but those two love birds were the king and queen of gossiping and I figured they might have some interesting things to say. Not that what they said should be taken seriously since they tended to exaggerate everything. But hey, I am only human, gossip is a part of our nature.

"Apparently Shikamaru caught him and another guy kissing at his cousins party and he found out from Tenzou that he moved in with that masked freak." What? This story sounded strangely familiar to me. And who other than Kakashi wore a mask? But could it be...? "I still can't believe that you haven't heard of it until now. Most of us have known for some time," Hayate said and stopped in his place, Yugao doing the same thing. They stood right in front of the backdoor.

"It doesn't surprise me that Hidan would do something like that since he created that bad reputation himself a long time ago, but to think that someone like Iruka was barking up the wrong tree... It's just... Wow... It's beyond my imagination," Yugoa sounded almost disappointed. I froze.

"And now he's on to the next guy. He sure doesn't waste any time. After hearing how he was as a child, I would have never guessed that he was the promiscuous type." Yugoa could not help herself from laughing at Hayate's comment.

"You can't always judge the book by it's cover, you know?" It sounded like Yugoa agreed with him despite of what she said. They started walking again, their voices getting lower as they got further and further away.

"Probably not, but I've had this weird feeling around him ever since I was told this. I feel like he's staring at me and I'm not the only one who thinks that. I bet he's looking for his next victim," Hayate said with dislike in his voice.

"Well, I'm a girl so I should be safe, right?"

When I could not hear them anymore, I was left stunned and speechless. _They know, but how? _I thought to myself trying to pick out the puzzle pieces they had given me during their conversation.

Had Shikamaru really been at Hidan's party? And what did Hayate mean by _his cousins party._ Were Hidan and Shikamaru cousins? But even worse was that now... now everyone thought that I was gay? And they thought that I was dating Kakashi? So this was why they had all been staring at me like that. Of course, how stupid could I be; Kakashi had already told me that he had been with another guy when he had found Hidan and I. If one saw something like that, they were practically bound to pass that information on and everyone in the entire village would know within a few days. It was just an unwritten rule and I was sure that most small villages worked like that.

My heart started pounding faster and I felt something that I had not felt in a long time. This burning feeling that took over my entire body and nearly forced me to my knees. I could not remember having felt like that in years, at least not as strongly. I dropped the cigarette and my fists tightened. I was staring into space.

Was Shikamaru trying to ruin everything for me?

**oOo**

I looked around me as I stomped through the supermarket. My hands were sweaty and I barely managed to swallow all the spit I was producing. If I was not careful, I was going to do something stupid once I found Shikamaru and confronted him about this thing. I was almost sure that I had seen him at work that day.

It turned out I was right because suddenly I found Shikamaru chatting with one of the male customers. Luckily, he did not see me and I was close enough to make out what they were saying.

"But how come he's not sick himself then?" the customer asked and raised an eyebrow at Shikamaru.

"I've heard that you can bear the disease without being affected by it, but you can still transfer it to someone else. I'm pretty sure it's the case here. I mean, Iruka obviously feels guilty for infecting his boyfriend so now he has moved in with him so he can make up for his mistake," Shikamaru said with an almost evil grin on his face. The guy beside him looked at him in astonishment and put on a dissatisfied look.

He was spreading more lies about me. That snake was ruining both mine and Kakashi's reputation!

The burning feeling in my body intensified. My eyes were watering, but not because I was about to cry, merely because it felt like they were in flames from staring so intensely at Shikamaru that lying rat. I would not be able to stop myself. I was already too close to him.

Suddenly, in what felt like the blink of an eye, Shikamaru was lying on the floor with me on top of him, blood running from his now crooked nose.

I was not able to open my mouth and say anything. It felt like my lips had been sown together and all I was able to do was clench my teeth and keep on punching. Shikamaru was helplessly trying to protect his face with his hands, but my fists broke through his barrier every time. I felt the anger as a lump in my throat. It was almost like time stood still.

No matter how many punches I lay on him, it did not seem to make a difference. I did not feel any better, but I could not stop myself from continuing.

There was blood on my hands, blood on my clothes and his, but most of all there was blood on his face. My body tensed up every time my knuckles connected with a part of the younger mans face. I did not know what I was doing. I was just doing it. Like I had always done it when I was younger.

I partly returned to reality when a pair of arms wrapped under my armpits and folded behind my neck. I could barely move in this position and was dragged away from Shikamaru within a few seconds.

"Stop it!" the man holding me shouted right into my ear and held me tighter as I closed my eyes and tried to wrench out of his grip and get back to Shikamaru.

"Let go of me! I'm going to kill him! Let go!" I screamed desperately and got him to loosen his grip just enough for me to slip one arm out, draw it forward and then throw it back till my elbow hit his face. I immediately went for Shikamaru again who was still lying on the floor, but just before I could grab onto his shirt, someone tripped me and I fell to the ground on my stomach. Two seconds after my face and body was held down with such force that I could not possibly move out of the spot.

I shouted death threats, wrenched the best I could and screamed in rage.

It took four men to get me under control.

When I was too exhausted to keep on fighting or screaming, I lay panting on the ground with several kilos on top of me. I was finally coming back to consciousness. I had not really been unconscious, it was more like a black out. Nevertheless, my eyes opened slowly and I looked over at the body that lay not far from me. He was not moving.

The police came about ten minutes after and I was handcuffed and led away. For a long time, nearly half an hour, I only remembered what had happened vaguely, but it all came back to me gradually. It had all happened so fast. I was over him before you could even get to snap your fingers. Why had this happened to me? I was not like this... At least not anymore. I had learned to control it. I knew all the warning signals; the sweaty palms, the burning feeling in my body, the feeling of losing control., but I had not been able to stop it. Not this time.

**oOo**

When I woke up the next day, I was cold and felt dirty. I did not recognize the smell of the place at first, but it did not take long until I realized when I had last been there.

"I said get up! Someone is waiting for you." I opened my eyes and looked at the police officer who was standing on the other side of the bars. My eyes were stinging and my whole body was sore after sleeping in such a poor bed.

Silently, I got up on my feet and went over to the door, which he opened.

"You're free to go since you're not getting charged with anything." The policeman followed me to the desk where another policeman provided me with some standard information – nothing that I had not heard before. I was then free to go and I went outside where I found a car and a brown haired man waiting for me.

It was Tenzou.

Without saying much to each other, we agreed that he would drive me home from the lockup. It was not until we got home to my place that he spoke. He had never really been fond of speaking in public.

"You're lucky that I was able to get you out of this mess... again," Tenzou said disappointingly as I sat down on a chair, elbows boring into my thighs and dropping my head into my hands.

"I know," I did not really feel like speaking, but Tenzou knew me all too well and did not plan on letting me get away with it that easily.

"His face is all swollen and you broke his nose. In fact, you almost broke mine too." I did not answer him, just kept my face hidden.

Silence fell upon us and I heard Tenzou walking around in the kitchen for a while before settling down on a chair opposite me. When the water in the electric kettle slowly began to boil, I figured he was making tea or something.

"I thought you had learned to control your anger? It's been so many years since you last blacked out like that." My eyes were closed behind my hands and I pretended like I was not listening. I wanted to be alone. "Iruka-san, the least you can do is answer me after I made sure you did not have to go to prison!" he sounded angry now and in a way I could understand why I was getting on his nerves. But could he not just leave me alone?

"I don't know what happened, okay! I don't know what else to tell you?" I looked up at him despairingly and dropped my hands to my lap. "I'm sorry. I can't explain what or why it happened, it just did."

"Is it because of the rumors?"

I shot him a deadly glare and answered, "It's not true." he just shook his head and looked at me seriously.

"I don't care if it is or not, I only want to know if that was what upset you?" I started avoiding his gaze again.

"Maybe... When did you even hear about them?"

"I asked Hayate-san yesterday if he knew what reason you could have to want to attack Shikamaru-san like that." Hayate that creep. But he was not even as big a creep as Shikamaru. "So... Aren't there any truth to the rumors at all?" he sounded confident when speaking. It was not a nervous pause he had taken in that sentence, more like a rhetorical pause.

"I told you alrea-"

"I know, but I don't believe you," he cut me off and crossed his arms over his chest. "Why else would you get so mad at him all of a sudden. You haven't raged like that since..." he did not say it when he saw the look on my face that was pathetically begging him not to mention anything about my childhood out loud. He sighed heavily and nodded slightly. "I think you should seek help, Iruka-san. Your issues with your past will not disappear just because you choose not to think about it anymore."

"Forget it, I'm not going to a psychologist again." I did not know what he was thinking. He was perfectly aware that the last one I had went to was not able to help me. It might have been many years ago, but I did not trust those people, they could not help me.

Tenzou was staring at me for a couple of seconds before he rose to his feet and went to stand in front of me, placing a hand on my shoulder. I looked up at him and listened carefully as he spoke, "Iruka..." I knew he meant serious business whenever he said my name without the honorific behind it. "I know you will never burden me with your problems even though I'm willing to listen. But you cannot live like this forever. You need to talk to somebody about this whether if it's me or not. Just get it done so you can move on." It felt kind of nice and reassuring when Tenzou touched my shoulder like that. It showed me that he was not disgusted by the rumors like the others were even if I had not completely rejected them.

He was right. He had always been there for me and he had always helped me out ever since he took me under his wing when I was just 15 years old, but I had never really appreciated his help or taken his hand whenever he stretched it out to me. I had simply ignored his kindness.

"Thank you for everything. But... I wanna be alone for awhile," I said, yet again not showing the appreciation or respect that Tenzou actually deserved.

"I understand. If you ever need me, you know my number." I nodded and expected him to turn and walk away, but instead he continued, "You do know, Iruka-san, this is nothing personal, but you can no longer work at the supermarket." I kind of figured that out already, but it still came as a shock to me.

"What? But... what am I supposed to do? I can't just go out and find another job. How the hell am I supposed to pay for rent?"

"I can't help it. Shikamaru-san demanded that you were fired if he was to let go of the charges. My hands are tied here. It's not like any of the others dare to work along side with you anymore anyway and the customers who saw you are terrified of you now," he apologized, but his voice was still firm.

"Wait a minute, so Shikamaru gets to keep his job, but I don't? He is the reason for all of this!" I rose so I stood toe to toe with Tenzou, staring him into his eyes with eyes filled with anger. I never meant to become so infuriated, but I could not help it. It felt like all my resentment had been locked away inside of me and finally been released the day before by Shikamaru and now I was not able to close the door again. Even if I did manage to close the it just a little, the rage was most likely to leak out from under the door. I did not know how I was going to stop it.

Tenzou just stared right back at me, fearlessly. "You shouldn't be so ungrateful! This is your only way out of prison!"

"I don't care, prison is better than getting kicked out on the street! You are the worst-" I was stopped in the middle of my sentence when Tenzou slapped me across my face. Probably because he wanted to knock some sense into me before I said something that I would later regret.

I placed one hand on the cheek where he had left a burning red mark and looked at him surprisedly. I was literally tongue tied.

"I'm sorry about all of this, Iruka-san, but there's nothing we can do to change what you did. I suggest you pack your stuff and leave this village. You used to talk about going to Tokyo, right? Well, I think it's time for you to go now. The memories you have from this village are holding you back so you can't develop properly, but it's not like there's anything that's stopping you from leaving anymore. Firing you is probably for the best. It's time for you to move on." He turned on his heels and walked to the door. I was used to that firm tone that he used with me, but this was different. He sounded more like a caring teacher or something than an employer. He looked back at me after opening the door, I had not moved out of my place. "I wish you luck, Iruka-san."

I sat in the very same position long after he was gone. Was he right? Would it be better for me to leave the village? It was not like I would have anywhere to stay, soon, when I could not afford living in my apartment anymore. I understood what he meant and agreed with him on almost everything. But... I could not help myself from thinking of a certain person when the words, _"... it's not like there's anything stopping you from leaving,"_ echoed in my mind.

If he had said those things to me just about a month ago, I would probably have left and never even thought of looking back. But that was past time. Back then, there was not anything keeping me from leaving the village besides from my apartment and my job. But now. Now I had nothing. Nothing besides from a newly gained friendship. Not to mention the first real friendship I had ever been involved in. At least the only appropriate one.

But could I get myself to leave now that I had Kakashi?

**oOooOooOo**

**More hints to what Iruka's childhood has been like and now he has to face a difficult choice that he is forced to take... LOL xD! I think there was more action in this one than the previous ones since the two last chapters were more like fillers that showed you how Kakashi and Iruka's friendship develop, why this shows how the story itself is developing. **

**I don't know if it turned out well though *sweat drop*... **

**I should probably get more practice.**

**Thank you for reading :)**


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

After being without work for nearly a week, I had decided to take a walk in the park and get some fresh air so I could clear my mind and figure out where my life was currently headed. That did not turn out to be such a good idea, though. I had met a bunch of prejudiced people off all ages and they all had their own way of dealing with me. The oldest of them were trash talking me in groups, but they were not whispering, they made sure to talk loud enough for me to hear what they were saying. Youngsters and people around my age snickered and giggled loudly whenever I passed their way, while the youngest group, who had not learned how to discretely tear people down mentally, were yelling stuff like, "butt pirate" and "sausage jockey" at me. Everyone was very mature about it, as you can see.

I tried my best not to get myself worked up over the majorities bias, but it was hard when I did not have anybody to support me. If I occasionally passed by someone who did not give me_ the_ _look_ or whispered something to their friend or yelled something at me, it did not make much of a difference anyway because I knew what they were thinking: they would rather pretend like I did not exist.

It did not get any better when I finally came back home. Someone had painted _"FAG"_ with big red letters across my door. The funny thing about it was that I did not actually get mad over the word they had written, but in fact I got angry at whoever did it because now I would have to pay for the damages they had done, with money I did not have, before I had to move out of my rented apartment.

And just when I thought that things could not get any worse, I discovered that my coffee machine had broken down. I gritted my teeth and closed my eyes tightly. "Calm down... Calm down, Iruka." I kept telling myself that for a minute or two before I was calm enough to look at the broken coffee machine again without feeling like throwing it out the window. It was not like I was going to have any use of it anyway once I was forced to move out of the apartment. A cup of coffee was a benefit of luxury, which I soon would not be able to afford anymore.

I did not plan on going through a sucky day like this one without even getting one cup of coffee so I put on my shoes again so I could go buy some Nescafe even if it did not taste as good as real coffee.

But when I flung the door open irritably, I almost walked right into Hidan.

"Hidan-san, what are you doing here?" I asked with a raised eyebrow, not stepping away from the doorway nor letting go of the door handle.

"I-I just came to see how you were doing. That's all," he said carefully and scratched the back of his neck. Hidan seemed a little tense, but I could not figure out what was wrong with him.

"I'm fine, why?" I asked confusedly. He looked at the entry door that opened inward before looking back at me and I slowly began to understand what he was getting at.

Hidan looked down at the floor and muttered, "Actually... I'm here to apologize."

"Huh, apologize for what?" He lost me there. I thought he came to ask me if the rumors were true or something like that. But apologize? What the hell did he have to apologize for?

"I'm sorry that I got you into this mess, Iruka-san. I confronted Shikamaru about it as soon as I found out, but he would not change his mind. I'm so sorry. It's all my fault. You losing your job and the rumors. If I had not kissed you that night, none of this would have happened! Please, forgive me." He bowed deeply and did not look up at me.

At first, I did not know what to say. He had completely caught me off guard with his apology and quite frankly I had no idea of what to answer.

"Uhm..." I started. "This isn't you fault, Hidan-san. I... Uhm." I was not comfortable with saying it aloud and especially not when Hidan was right in front of me. "I was the one who kissed you. Remember? This is my own fault."

His head shot up and he looked directly at me. "Don't say that! I was the one who got all flirty with you and it's my brainless cousin who got you fired!" It looked like he wanted to grab me and shake me till I agreed with him. But he remained relatively calm for now.

I sighed loudly and shook my head. There was no sense in what he was saying. "You can't be serious? Just because you encouraged me doesn't mean that I suddenly lose my free will. It was my own decision and I have to take the consequences that come along with that decision. And that _brainless_ cousin of yours can think for himself too, you know? You can't take responsibility for what he did."

"I know, but I still feel like it's my fault! Isn't there anything I can do to make up for it?"

I laughed at his comment. "No, unless you can conjure a rent-free place to live up or make it start raining with money, I don't think there's anything you can do." Hidan suddenly got a weird, concerned look on his face.

"Are... are you getting kicked out?" Guiltiness was written all over his face. I tried not to appear too annoyed.

"Isn't that obvious? I won't be able to pay rent without a job." What I said made me wonder for how long I would actually be able to stay in the apartment without paying. Since it was almost the 1st of the month, I would probably get kicked out before my birthday. Not that it actually mattered. I did not do anything important on my birthday anyway.

All of a sudden it looked like a bright shinning light bulb appeared over Hidan's head and a wide smile spread across his face. "Why don't you just move in with me? I have plenty of room!" I knew he was just trying to be helpful, but I could not help myself from glaring at him. Considering what he added afterward, I figured my message came across. "It's nothing permanent of course. Only till you find a new job." He took a second to think everything through before continuing, "But don't expect that you can live with me for free. If you clean the entire house once every week and whenever it's dirty, I can pay you for that. And you can live with me as my maid," he said, trying to sound firm, but the smile ruined his not so serious attitude. His offer did not sound particularly flattering. Especially not the "my maid" part.

I knew he was only trying to make it sound like I was not a charity project, but when it was as obvious as it was that that was what he was doing, I had a hard time imagining that I could ever accept his offer. I liked being able to take care of myself and I did not feel the need to burden others with my problems.

"So, what do you say? It could be kind of fun to have a roommate," he said, looking like an expectant child. That was when I realized that this was not just all about charity.

"_I just tend to get a bit lonely when living in this big house all by myself." _I remembered what he had told me that night at his party. This was not just about charity. Hidan was lonely and this was his chance at changing his situation into the better. I felt kind of sorry for him, but I still did not feel like just accepting his offer just like that.

"I don't know about this. Is it okay if I give you my answer later?" Hidan did not seem too thrilled about my current answer. In fact, he actually seemed rather disappointed. I did not like to be the one to put out those bright Christmas lights in his eyes, but I just did not like the idea of accepting his rather generous offer.

"Oh, sure. But don't decline just to be polite. I really wanna make up for all of this." I did not want to get into an argument with him so I pushed past him and locked the door after me.

"I would have invited you in, but I was on my way out. I'll see you later and thanks." I left the apartment complex before Hidan and walked with long, rapid steps so he would not catch up to me immediately in case he was going to follow me. He did not, though, and I went to buy instant coffee without any further trouble.

My earlier working place had the cheapest instant coffee in town and at the moment I should not be spending more money than necessary, but I figured I would not be welcomed very well if I went there so I went to a small, private kiosk instead.

The man who owned the shop charged way too much for the coffee, but at least he did not give me as dirty looks as I imagined I would have gotten at the supermarket.

On my way back home, I decided to take another way than I normally did just to avoid human contact. I had so many things that I needed to think over and I was afraid that all the stress would drive me insane. I just needed some closure. I needed to know what was going to happen.

For so many years everyday had looked alike. There was rarely anything out of the ordinary that happened. But lately my life had changed. First, it changed to the better, but then all of a sudden I stood in a worse situation than I did before. No job, soon no apartment either, a bad reputation and on top of all of that, I was beginning to feel that I was not in control of my own feelings anymore. I had thoughts about Kakashi in a way that I should not and other than that I got angry when someone confronted me about it. I was becoming my old self. How could I feel attracted to him when I did not want to think of him in that way? And was it that obvious to everyone? But why did it bother me that people knew about my presumably true feelings? How could I let myself get so much out of control?

I had walked in my own thoughts for several minutes and did not notice anything weird until our steps were no longer in unison. Someone was following me. Carefully, I looked over my shoulder, seeing three men in big winter jackets with their hoods on.

That's strange. Why would they walk around in such warm jackets during springtime?

I listened carefully as one of them whispered something to the others, but I could not make out what they were saying. After that, they gradually increased their pace and out of sheer instinct, I started walking faster too so they would not come up beside me.

Was it me they were after? No, that would not make any sense. Why would they be after someone like me? I did not look like someone with lots of money, I would not be worth robbing. I also did not carry anything of importance or anything expensive, only a glass jar of instant coffee – that alone said a lot about my money situation. No, it was not me they were after. I was just working myself up over nothing again. Even though, I still could not help but wonder if it was a wrong observation or not that they constantly increased their pace whenever I did it too.

My body began to feel warmer, but not because of excitement, it was more likely the adrenaline that rushed through my body that was heating it.

A small lump formed in my throat. Do not run, do _not_ run, I kept telling myself and closed my eyes for a few seconds to collect my thoughts. Okay, Iruka, this is stupid. Why would anyone want to attack you? You don't not have any actual enemies. Do you? If I was to be attacked, was it just a coincidence that I had recently been labeled _gay_? What was it they wanted from me? Teach me a lesson... or maybe... kill me? It was not like it was unheard of that gay people got killed merely because of their sexual preference. But was I to become one of them?

I kept coming up with all sorts of reasons for their presence without even knowing if they actually wanted anything from me. It just seemed to fit. I was walking alone, we were walking in an almost deserted area and I had a rumor of being something that many people did not approve of. It was a never ending discussion between my logical sense and my paranoia. I could easily argument for and against the chance of them jumping me, but of course I would never reach a conclusion by just thinking. They needed to take action... No, I needed to take action. I was not scared of them.

In a split second, I stopped walking. I did not turn around, I did not say anything. I just stood there.

My concerns were then confirmed. They had stopped walking too.

"You've got to be kidding me," I whispered under my breath and started sprinting without a warning. They copied my movements just as I expected.

I began to sweat and pant pretty quickly, but not because I was running as fast as I could, but because I was terrified. I wanted to look over my shoulder and see how close they were, but it was not necessary because I could hear their steps behind me. They were close and I did not need to risk anything by distracting myself by looking back. It was what all the main characters in movies did and they always end up tripping themselves or something like that. But this was not a movie. This was real life and unfortunately for me, I had to realize the ugly truth – I could not out run them. I was too slow.

Suddenly a hand slammed down on my shoulder and I was pulled back with a jerk and pushed into an alleyway where I was pressed up against a dirty wooden wall, one man on both my sides were pinning both my arms to it, the third man standing in front of me. When my left hand hit the wall, I accidentally let go of the jar of instant coffee and it fell to the asphalt and shattered.

I wrenched the best I could and tried to kick them, but they just dodged it and kicked me back in return for my resistance and lay more pressure on my arms; they were probably going to bruise, but that was of my least concern at the moment. What they were about to do to me was going to be far worse than just small bruises on my arms.

"I don't have any money on me so piss off!" I shouted in the leading man's face. He just raised an eyebrow at me and laughed slightly.

"So... You think it's money we're after, huh?" Actually, I did not think it was money, but I just did not know what else to say and maybe if I could get them to talk I could get some kind of an idea of why I was here with them. "We're not after your money. In fact we are getting paid for just being here with you."

"Yeah, we have a message from our friend whose nose you broke," the man on the left hissed near my ear and pressed my arm harder against the wall so I could not help myself from closing one eye in pain.

Their friend whose nose I broke... Shikamaru? Did he pay them to... attack me?

"Don't think we're going to go easy on you just because you're a queen," said the man on the right. Great, I could not even get around that rumor when being jumped.

I looked at the man who spoke last with narrowed eyes and bit the inside of my cheeks in anger. "What are you waiting for then?" All three seemed rather surprised that I was not going to put up much more of a struggle. "Just get it over with so I can go home, please," I snarled and looked the one in front of me in the eyes. I was being dead serious. If I could not get around this, they might as well get it done quickly so I could move on with my life.

The grip around my arms loosened a little and all three men looked at each other in astonishment. "Well, haven't heard that one before. You're a brave one, aren't you?" he snickered, only making me even more angry. That degrading laugh, it made me want to kill him right there and then.

"I never expected something like that from a fag," the one on the left grinned and chuckled viciously. At that point, I did not care who was attacking who anymore. I could not hold myself back.

I jerked my right hand away and it slipped away from the right man's hold easily. While they were busy making fun of me, they were not actually paying any attention to me. This was my chance. I just needed one shot. Just one to try and get this feeling out of my system once and for all.

"I said, what are you waiting for?" I shouted and punched the man on my left right on the jaw so hard that I could feel how it almost dangled out of place. Of course neither of them were really happy about my action and they stopped laughing at me immediately, jumping me instead.

I was overpowered from the very beginning and lay on the ground within a few seconds. They let several punches rain on me and they kicked, cursed and spat on me. They sure were not holding anything back any longer. The only thing I could do was try and protect my face with my sore almost numb arms.

"Hold him," one of them said and the other two did as they were told. I peeked out from under my eyelids to see what the man was planning on doing. He was walking over to the place where we had stood before and he stooped to pick something up. I did not realize what it was until he stood over me with one leg on each side of me, squatting down till he almost sat on my stomach. My eyes slightly widened.

He looked at the piece of glass he was holding between his fingers, examining every possible side of it.

"You should not forget who you are," he smirked and grabbed the bottom of my shirt, pulled up and wrapped it behind my head so I could not see what he was doing. I had a feeling, though, that this was not going to feel pleasant.

When the glass touched my chest, my whole body shivered and I started wrenching desperately to get out of their grip, but I could not get away and I was not able to stop myself from screaming in agony when he pressed it down my chest, spelling the horrible three lettered word out loud as he cut it deep into my skin. It was stinging like a paper cut and burning like a flatiron at the same time.

**oOo**

About two and a half hours later, I was walking down a stone path I barely knew. My white t-shirt was soaked in blood on the front and there was still clotted blood under my nose and the small amount that were smeared around my face.

I was not about to die or anything, but I was beat and my mind was tired. When I had gotten back to my apartment after taking a good beating from those "mercenaries," the landlord had been standing outside my door and was about to throw a letter through my letter box.

"_Oh, you are here." the landlord looked at me from top to toe and wrinkled up his nose in disgust. I was pretty sure that it was clear to him what had happened, but he did not give a damn, just continued, crumbling up the letter "You don't need to read this then, I can just tell it straight to you. I want your out and that's pronto." My day could not get any better than this. How did he even know that I had money problems?_

"_But I have enough money to pay for rent for at least another month and I paid for this month already so you can't kick me out until the end of the month," I said logically and glared at him._

_The shorter man just shrugged his shoulders. "I don't care. You can have some of your money back for this month. I already have another tenant so you can't stay here anymore."_

"_What? You can't do that!"_

"_Well, I am." I looked at him despairingly, he was avoiding eye contact. I finally understood what was going on. This was not about money. This was about my newly gained gay reputation._

_I sighed loudly and shook my head lightly, "How many days do I have?" I asked carefully._

"_Zero."_

"_Wh... Bu... Where the hell am I supposed to go? What about my stuff, I can't take it all with me now?"_

_The landlord waved his hand indifferently while turning away from me. "Not my problem. You're allowed to go in and take all the stuff you can carry with you now. The rest will be stored on the attic and you can come and get it later." He was already on his way down the stairs when he looked back at me over his shoulder and said, "Return the key to me before you leave." He did not give me any choice. I had been kicked out of my own apartment for being gay. What was wrong with people now a days?_

And suddenly I was standing in front of a huge house, knocking on the door, but not getting an answer. I sniffled and looked up at the tall door, adjusting the shoulder-strap of my bag with one hand so it would not slide off my shoulder.

Maybe this was a sign that it was wrong of me to show up on his doorstep and beg for a place to stay. Sure, he himself had offered that I could stay with him, but it still did not feel right to be there. But then where should I go?

I stood gazing down at the ground for another few minutes, but when no one came to answer the door, I figured it really was a mistake to come there and decided to go somewhere else. Where to go, I had no idea, but here was not the place for me.

Then, all of a sudden, I heard a loud splash from the backyard of the house and it sounded like someone was laughing as well. That laugh could not be mistaken – it belonged to Hidan without a doubt.

I shuffled on my feet for a moment, thinking whether or not to go back there. I thought through all of my options. There was not really any. I could not go to Kakashi's place. Not matter what that just was not an option. I did not have any other friends or family to turn to and Hidan was the only other person I was on good terms with who I also kind of considered my friend. I could either choose to be sleeping outside or ask Hidan if I could stay at his place for a while until I found something else. I did not really have anything to lose besides from my pride, but at least I would have a place to stay.

I walked via the stone path to the backyard of the house, finding Hidan standing in a pair of black and dark blue swim shorts by the pool. He was looking down at someone who I did not recognize at first, but when he got out of the pool and walked up close to Hidan, I recognized him as the doctor from the hospital. The one who had treated Kakashi. Kakuzu, right? What was he doing here with Hidan? I was not sure of how they would react to my presence so I decided to play a waiting game before making my next move.

It was hard to make out what they were saying and I could only hear a few words once in a while, but nothing that made any sense when heard out of context. Hidan stood with his hands on his hips and Kakuzu with his arms crossed over his chest. At first, it seemed like they were talking about something serious, but then a small smile started playing on Hidan's lips and he stepped closer to Kakuzu who immediately looked down at the ground, the tanned man blushing slightly.

Hidan then turned his back towards the other man who grabbed a bottle of sunscreen and soon after started spreading the creme over his back. When he was done, Hidan turned to face him again, placing his mouth right beside Kakuzu's ear and whispered something to him

The situation seemed rather odd to me, though, I guessed helping out with protecting someone else from the dangerous UV rays of the sun was not that weird, but I had not seen nothing yet because suddenly Hidan's arms slid under Kakuzu's and behind his wet back, gliding down until it reached the edge of his red swim shorts. Kakuzu jumped when Hidan's hands dug under the fabric and grabbed a handful of his ass without any warning. Hell, I even jumped in surprise when I saw that. What was he doing?

Kakuzu blushed madly and looked away from Hidan, but that did not seem to change Hidan's plans. He pressed his bare chest up against Kakuzu's wet and naked upper body and Hidan lowered his head towards Kakuzu's shoulder, gently placing a few fleeting kisses on it.

I had to place one hand in front of my mouth to stop myself from saying something out loud. Why was Hidan coming on to Kakuzu so strongly? Was there something between the two of them? At least that would explain what the doctor was doing at Hidan's place in the first place. But Hidan only did guys for fun, right? He had said so himself. Then why did this seem more serious than just a simple flirt? They were seeing each other in private for crying out loud!

Kakuzu squealed when Hidan's hands slid away from his ass – one hand stopped when reaching the deepest part of Kakuzu's back while the other continued up until reaching his short, soaked hair – Hidan looking him right into his eyes, their faces only being inches away from each other.

I could not stop my cheeks from flushing. I felt like such a creeper when standing there watching them like they were performing some sort of live porn.

Hidan did not seem to have a problem with his own actions. Kakuzu, on the other hand, seemed a little nervous, but it did not look like he was not enjoying Hidan's sensual touch.

They smiled at each other. Hidan smiled his usual confident smile while Kakuzu's was more careful and innocent, almost child like. They leaned closer to each other and slowly pressed their lips together. When tongues started getting involved, it all became too much for me and I backed quickly. I was not supposed to see this. That much I understood.

I was just about to make my escape when I took a step back, hitting something behind me, which caused me to lose balance and fall right into a huge pile of cardboard and Styrofoam boxes. They could not possibly have avoided hearing the loud sounds from my clash with the boxes. I had given myself away and now I would not only be known as a super homo, but also a creepy peeping Tom.

I was struggling to get back up on my feet when Hidan shouted, "Who's there?" Soon both he and Kakuzu stood right in front of me, looking down at my beat up figure.

"H-Hey, guys," I said, trying to act cool and like nothing had happened. This was really embarrassing, just like that time at the laundromat with Kakashi. Why was I so clumsy?

Hidan looked at me with widened eyes. He had frozen unlike Kakuzu who immediately rushed to my side and carefully helped me back up onto my feet.

"Are you okay, what happened?" he asked hurriedly. I rubbed my back with one hand and glanced shiftily at the concerned tanned man to the stunned pale dude.

"Argh, nothing, I'm just clumsy," I replied, trying to get out of having to answer what he was actually asking.

"I-Iruka..." Hidan could not finish whatever it was he was trying to say. He was just staring at me intensely for some weird reason. I could not figure why he had frozen up like that all of a sudden.

"Iruka-san, you are seriously injured. This isn't just from falling into a few boxes. Were you in a fight or something?" Kakuzu started checking me like it was perfectly normal to examine a stranger you had only met once. But I guess that was just a doctor thing.

"No, I'm fine. Don't worry." I tried taking a step away from Kakuzu, but he just matched my move and suddenly grabbed the edge of my shirt and nearly pulled it over my head when he removed it from my stomach and chest to see what had caused the dark red spots on the front of my shirt.

I could only just look over the edge of the shirt, which Kakuzu was holding in front of my face. He immediately looked up at Hidan who looked from my chest to Kakuzu. Their expressions were a mix of fear and pity.

**oOo**

I sat in the kitchen on a chair by the dinner table with one arm resting on the table and the other hanging loosely down my side. Hidan was still looking at me in that weird, scared way and it was impossible for me to figure out what was going through his mind. I never thought that it would be possible for a human to see this, but it actually looked like he was having some kind of flashbacks. He was so distant.

Kakuzu left the kitchen to go to the bathroom to get some peroxide and cloths to wash me up. I stayed back with Hidan who was focusing on the wounds on my chest.

"Pretty impressive, huh?" I said sarcastically and managed to make a small chuckle in my throat. He finally made eye contact with me.

"Who did this to you?" he asked with difficulty. My guess was that he had a lump in his throat – why? - I did not know.

"I told you already, it doesn't matter," I said flatly and wished that he would just let it go already.

"Don't say tha-"

"Doesn't matter," I repeated and shot him a short and warning glare. I did not feel like talking about it. Hidan finally seemed to understand that I was not going to say anything as long as he tried to push me into doing it.

We sat in silence for a moment, but I just could not take it and felt like I had to say something and so I looked at him teasingly and asked, "So, what's with you and that Kakuzu guy. You seemed to be getting along pretty well." Hidan looked at me in astonishment and I was surprised to see his cheeks turn pink.

"Y-You saw that... didn't you? Well..." he stammered and looked away from my gaze, a small, shy smile appearing on his lips. "Well... It's nothing. We were just playing around." They were _"playing around,"_ but not in the way Hidan was implying that they were.

"I thought guys were only for the fun stuff. It didn't seem like that was all you were doing with that guy," I raised a brow and sent him a wide smile. He just kept looking away from me. That was answer enough for me. "So... What made you change your mind all of a sudden?"

He bit his lower lip and it looked like he was trying to think carefully about his reply before answering. "Well... You know we exchanged numbers, right? That day at the hospital." I nodded when he glanced at me. "Uhm... Well... Not long after that, he asked me out on a date... And... I... I accepted."

"Why?" My questions seemed to make him a little uncomfortable. Not in a bad way, he just became a little shy and unsure of himself.

"Because I have never been asked out on a date by a guy before so it was just different. I normally don't go on dates with men, but.. Well... Kakuzu just seemed different from both the guys and girls that I'm used to being around so I just went along because I thought it could end up becoming a fun experience."

"And then you fell in love with a dude just like that?" He looked at me like I was some kind of idiot and if it was not because I was hurt to begin with, I'm sure he would have hit me hard on the shoulder.

He tsk'ed and sent me a smile, "I never said that I was in love? We're just... Well... dating? Kinda."

"Kinda? Where do you think it's leading to or rather, which turn do you wish it to take yourself?"

"I don't know? I'm just gonna wait and see what happens. I think I like him more than most girls I've ever been with, but I'm not sure if I would be willing to go into a real relationship with a guy. I'm just afraid to hurt Kakuzu since I think that he is putting a lot into this. It was him who contacted me first, after all."

"Well, I don't know him that well, but he seems like a great guy. I'm sure whatever you choose it'll be for the best." We smiled at each other and he nodded agreeably.

"Hopefully... But... Iruka-san. Could you please not tell anyone about us?" he asked, fiddling with his fingers in his lap.

"I guess, how come?" In a way, that was a stupid question. He had seen what kind of problems being gay, or at least having people think that you were gay, had caused me and he probably just did not want the same to happen to him or Kakuzu. Though, Kakuzu seemed to be the only one here who was content about who he was. Maybe that was why he had appeared strange to me the first time I met him. He had these weird, feminine, smooth movements. Unlike Hidan and myself, Kakuzu knew what he were and who he was. As Hidan had said it, it was Kakuzu who asked Hidan out, after all. Did he have one of those so called gaydars all gay men claimed to have? I laughed mentally at the thought – maybe then he could tell me if I was gay or not.

"I don't really care what people think of me, but... I don't want Zabuza to know. Not until I know if this is serious or not. If it is, I want to tell him myself." I had heard something about Zabuza being picky about his friends and he was kind of unpredictable and had strong beliefs about certain things, including gay people. If the two of them really were best friends, then it was not hard to understand that Hidan would rather bring him the news himself.

"Don't worry, I'm not gonna tell anyone." He sent me a short, insecure smile and then looked away from me. We both went silent.

When Kakuzu returned, he removed all the blood from my body, disinfected the wounds and checked my nose, jaw, ribs and chest. He told me that I should be okay. My nose was not broken nor did my jaw and ribs seem to have taken damage and the wound did not need stitching or anything like that. He did point out, though, that the wounds were so deep that they were definitely going to scar.

I stood in front of the mirror in one of the bathrooms of Hidan's house, looking at my upper body. Forever scarred, I thought to myself, tracing one finger over the stinging skin on my chest.

_Fag._

**oOooOooOo**

**Phew, this chapter got long xD But I guess I owe you that for making you wait so long for it. Excuse of the day: I got so far behind with my homework that I was on the verge of getting kicked out for good – two years of (semi-) hard work would be wasted! I had to pull myself together and get everything done (actually, I was forced to do so since I wasn't able to avoid writing prison for the first time in two years -_-') But now I only have one essay left to make this year and I'm not behind with it... - yet xD... So I'll finally have time to write again!**

**Not proud of this chapter in anyway. Don't know if it's the stress that have caused me to become this bad at writing, but something must have happened 'cause I'm never satisfied with anything I do anymore. I said it before, though, and I'll gladly say it again: I did my best. If my best wasn't good enough, then I just have to work even harder.**

**Nonetheless, I hope you enjoyed the chapter. I promise Kakashi action in the next chapter + Iruka's lifestory within the two-three next chapters. Now you have something to look forward too, hopefully xD. The next chapter will be up as soon as possible! I won't make you wait this long again and that's a promise *thumbs up, Gai smile***


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

I sat in the passenger seat of Hidan's five door Hummer on the 26th of May. Time had gone by slowly for once, but I was still surprised to realize that I had lived with the albino looking man for nearly four weeks already. Living with him was not as bad as I had imagined it could be. He was a fine host and he was good at making me feel like I was not just poncing at him.

The deal we had made regarding me cleaning the house was carried out two days a week – maybe three if needed. Mostly, I only had to clean the rooms of the house that were actually in use, but once every second week, I made sure to thoroughly take care of the entire house so you would not end up drowning in dust when entering one of the more passive rooms.

Hidan changed the radio station with one hand, but kept his eyes on the road.

"Hey, what's wrong with that song?" I asked irritably as he changed away from one of my favorite songs, _Silverflame_ with_ Dizzy Mizzy Lizzy_.

"I'm tired of that melancholic rock. Especially _that_ song. Kakuzu listens to it all the time!" he answered, still fumbling with the radio.

"Of course he does, it's a great song. Do you even know which band it is?" Hidan glared at me for a brief second, but at the same time, a small smile showed on his lips.

"No, I don't. I'm just sick and tired of it because it played on every single station in Japan when I was younger." True, you could easily ruin a song by listening to it too often, but I had not had a radio as a child so I had only listened to music whenever I was outside the orphanage.

I pushed his hand away from the radio and began searching for a channel in his place so he could keep both hands on the steering wheel. It only took me a short moment to find another channel. This one played only classical music. Hidan sent me an unsatisfied look, but I just shot him a wide, provoking smile as he chose to give up the fight this time. We always fought over which radio station we should listen to when he took me somewhere in his car.

Silence fell upon us and I settled down to just listening to the calming music. A soothing piano never failed to make me relax or help me gather my thoughts.

Kakuzu and Hidan had seemed to become really close throughout the past month. Kakuzu practically never left Hidan's house, only when he had to go to work. I could not help but feel kind of jealous of their relationship when watching them. Hidan always appeared to be a little happier when Kakuzu was around and I was beginning to think that they were really going to end up becoming boyfriends, even if they did not want to put a label on it yet.

Hidan was the first person I had ever personally known who was involved with someone of their own gender. I had a lot of questions that I wanted to ask him and I had actually tried to bring their relationship up at various occasions, but the conversations always seemed to go off track before I could even get to snap my fingers. I wished it would not since I was hoping that he could clarify a thing two for me about my own sexual confusion. It just never seemed like the right time and place to bring up the subject. Maybe I should not put so much thought into it before asking him about it. It was a definite possibility that it was my obvious inquisitiveness and awkwardness that scared him away every time. But what if I just brought it up casually?

I cleared my throat quietly as the latest playing song faded out. "So... how are things going with you and Kakuzu?"

Hidan immediately glanced over at me. "Huh? Oh, I think it's going great." A smile slowly started to take over his features. My plan was working... so far. Now I just had to play my card right.

"What's with the smile? Planning on popping the question already?" I asked sarcastically and sent him a knowing smile, immediately regretting my stupid comment and I was surprised to receive a playful hit on the shoulder.

"Shut up, you moron," he chuckled and shook his head lightly at my ridiculous question. "I like Kakuzu a lot so I think I'll stay with him for a while."

"Really? So you're planning on making it official then?" Hidan shook his head and his smile turned into one I could not really interpret.

"Kakuzu wants me to meet his friends and parents and such, but I'm not really ready for that yet. He doesn't care if the whole world knows about us, but I still wanna wait and see what happens. He just doesn't understand that because he's used to dating guys."

"Sounds like you've gotten yourself a gold-digger?" I laughed and Hidan luckily got that I was just joking.

"No, he's not like that at all. He's seeking someone to spend his life with - unlike me. I've been with a lot more women and men than he has, but he has had steady relationships since he was, what, thirteen? And they were all with men, so I don't wanna rush things if I just end up disappointing him anyway."

"I guess that's kinda nice of you." I looked at Hidan from the corner of my eye and observed him like that for a minute or two, none of us saying anything in the mean time.

He really did not mind talking about him and Kakuzu, did he? So maybe he was the right guy for me to pump for information after all. I had asked him about those things once before, but now that he was actually seeing someone and I would be asking more specifically what he had done with that man, would it then still be okay for me to ask? Or would I be getting too close? Too personal? Since I did not really know how good friends Hidan and I actually were, there was nothing else to do than just jump into the situation and see how he would react. Test the limits.

I gulped, trying not to make it loud enough for him to hear and then I slowly began to break the silence. "How far have you gone with this one?" I asked carefully, Hidan reacting to my question within the same second as it was asked.

"You sure like to ask a lot of questions, don't you?" he stated with a big grin on his face. I blushed slightly and looked away from him.

"Never mind."

"No, it's okay. I don't mind answering," he chuckled, "I'm just surprised that you ask." I felt how he was glancing at me with those suspicious eyes of his. If I was not careful, he would definitely guess what was on my mind. I mean, I had already kind of revealed to him that I was interested in men. If it was not at least axiomatic to him that I was the slightest bit curious by then, you would think he had been walking around wearing blinders for the past months. But I still had to be careful with what I spilled since I did not want him to know just who it was I was chasing. "We haven't done anything yet," he declared flatly. When I looked at him, his eyes were kept immovably on the road.

"Seriously? How come?" Hidan shrugged, but did not even glance at me.

"I don't know, I guess we just haven't had the chance yet." Liar. You have had all the chances you need.

"But he stays over at night. I figured you two got serious when "going to bed?""

"We do... Though not in the way you think. We just talk. That's it."

"Are you pulling my leg now, Hidan?" I asked in a serious tone, not believing that he never did anything to Kakuzu when he had him all to himself. Hidan sure was a complex guy. He seemed to be of easy virtue and was all about being with most girls - or men – at all possible in one night. But he was also this calm guy who sat down and talked about serious stuff. I had seen both sides of him myself. How did he make it work? Would most not have to have a split personality in order for two personality traits in total contrast to each other to function together? Apparently Hidan did not. The two sides of him worked perfectly together in spite of their differences.

"No, we haven't gone that far, honestly."

"But it sounds like you wanna?"

"Sure, do you have a problem with that?" he sounded more serious than before.

"No... No, not at all." I knew he was only kidding, but the atmosphere still went a little uncomfortable.

We sat in silence and I began to wonder if I had been too nosy again. I could not seem to find that fine line between snooping around in others' private life and being just genuinely curious.

After getting over the embarrassment, I finally asked why it was he had brought me along with him on this trip. Turns out he wanted me to help him buy a present for Kakuzu. I was to give him my opinion on whatever he found so he would not buy something that Kakuzu would not like. According to Hidan, Kakuzu and I had the same taste in a lot of things, not just music.

The present was bought and we went back to his house again, the clock being around 3 pm. While we were out shopping, I took time to buy some groceries as well. Hidan was not exactly a food expert and if it was up to him, we would eat take out every single day. I was just lucky that he had found himself a man who knew how to cook so I was not the only one left in the kitchen to make dinner every night. Not that I had much culinary experience, but I was used to living alone and figured out a long time ago that you needed at least some solid food every week in order to stay just the slightest bit healthy. I could not afford becoming sick - he could – which was probably the reason why he did not care what he stuffed his pale face with.

I grabbed all the bags of groceries while Hidan only got his present. That man could be a gentleman, but also the biggest and most ignorant asshole ever. The least he could have done was take one of the bags. But no, no, no. Those types of socially accepted helpful deeds did not apply to Hidan. He was mostly kind at the strangest moments. Neither did he care to unlock nor open the door for me now that I did not have any free hands. Luckily I managed to position myself so I could hold some of the bags with my thigh while unlocking the door and pushing it open with my shoulder, but there was no time for a victory dance because the same minute as I stepped inside my current residence, I was almost knocked off my feet when something unexpected happened.

"Surprise!" a group of people all shouted in chorus, me having to take control over the labile bags before I could place them on the floor so I could take a look around at the gathering.

Zabuza, Asuma, Itachi, Anko and none other than Kakashi all stood with wide smiles plastered to their faces. All of their smiles directed towards me. I was perplexed to say the least.

"What's the occasion?" I asked and looked around in confusion.

Hidan walked up behind me and put a hand on my shoulder. "Have you forgotten your own birthday?" I turned my neck to raise my brow at him.

"My birthday?" All that trouble I had went through lately with that assault, the judging people of the village and moving into a new house had completely thrown me off track. It was the 26th of May so it was a proven fact that this was the day I turned 26. "How did you know?" I glanced around at everyone, still not believing that they had all showed up just because it was my birthday. 26 was nothing big. Nothing worth mentioning or celebrating. It was just another day to get over with like it had been all the previous years.

The most unbelievable thing, though, had to be the actual group of people that had showed up. I did not even consider most of them to be actual friends so why where they here? Sure, I had seen a lot more of Zabuza after moving in with Hidan and Itachi digged hanging around too, but I did not really speak with any of them all that much. And Asuma was just Kakashi's friend, at least to me, and Anko was Kakashi's girlfriend, nothing more. Kakashi though... He was my friend... I guess? But I had not even seen him once after that week where I had taken care of him. So could I still consider us friends?

"Connections, Iruka, connections," Kakashi sent me his signature smile and chuckled quietly at his own statement. He had not gone back to using honorifics with me, which probably meant that that first time he had not done it was not an accident and I was still allowed to see him as my friend, right? I had to fight off a goofy grin that threatened to take over my entire face when having reflected over my situation. I had not felt this happy in a long time. How was Kakashi able to make me feel this way? I felt so warm and there was no reason for it. It was not because something warm had psychically been wrapped around me. It was like a mental blanket sewn from the finest accepting words that caused this sensation. A soft, safe embrace.

Hidan took care of the groceries from there and the other attendees guided me into the living room on the left where a table of gifts were waiting for me. When my eyes fell on that table, I paused. I was not able to move for several seconds. I felt how all the others' eyes fell on me, but the stares I received still did not provoke and reaction out of me.

"_It's okay. Take it," the tall blond said encouragingly with a wide smile. I was staring at the four-cornered box in his hand that was wrapped in black paper with Japanese flags._

_I had never gotten a present before. The infant home did not give any of the children presents for their birthdays, probably because it would end up costing them too much in the long run. _

_The man with the yellowish hair chuckled lightly and reached out for my hand, placing the box in my palm. My eyes followed his movements and paused again to look at the nicely wrapped present. _

"_Don't you wanna find out what's inside it?" he asked quietly and my gaze glided to his friendly expression. _

"_... Y-Yes," I whispered, but I still did not make as if to unwrap it. I was being impolite, but my mind would not accept the fact that the present was actually for me._

_He could easily tell that I was scared because of his unfamiliar gesture and somehow he always seemed to know what to do when I froze up like that. _

_A reassuring hand was placed on my shoulder and he nodded slowly. I stared at him for a second before finally beginning to remove the birthday wrapping with a slightly trembling hand._

"_Open it," he said, perfectly managing not to sound demanding. Mistrust was the expression that spread over my face as I opened the cardboard box, revealing the contents inside._

_I took the keychain and held it up in front of myself. The metal ring bore three different pendants; a blue dolphin teddy, a black strap with yellow flashes of lighting on it and an acrylic frame containing a picture of the current giver and receiver standing beside each other, both wearing wide smiles._

"_Do you like it?" I nodded in response and glanced at the pocket of his overalls. I knew that was where he kept his keychain. "Well, to be honest that's not the actual gift," he added and stuck his hand down his pocket and fished out his own keychain, maneuvering a key out of the silver ring._

_He then reached out his fist towards me, slowly opening his hand when I lay eyes on it. _

"_A key?" I asked in bewilderment as he gently took the keychain from me to attach the key to it._

"_It's the spare key to my house." My heart skipped a beat as he finished his sentence. A key to his house? _

_My lips parted, but I was not about to speak. Tears found their way to my already glossy eyes and I held my breath. I desperately tried to sink a sob that threatened to escape my shivering body, but it just ended up feeling like I was choking myself, making me give into my feelings in the end as tears started streaming down my face. I tried to hide them by placing one arm over my eyes, but the sounds still gave me away._

"_Don't cry, Iruka-chan," he whispered assuasively and squatted down in front of my short form to level with me._

_I wanted to step closer. All this time I had felt so alone, but now I was not anymore, the yellow haired man had just made me sure of it. Slowly, without looking up from my hiding place, I reached out one hand till it connected with older man's shoulder. He quickly comprehended my intention and decided to help me the rest of the way, pulling me closer to him and wrapping his arms around me. _

"_Thank you, Minato-sensei!" I cried, wetting the fabric covering his shoulder as my hand, which was holding onto one of the straps of his overalls, turned into a shaky fist. _

_I knew he did not like it when I called him sensei, but it was impossible for me to call him anything else. He was my sensei even if that was not how he viewed our relationship. He was too modest to think of himself otherwise. As he used to say, he was just a mere janitor. Nothing else, nothing more._

_I did not care what he was. Even if that was all he was in others' eyes, I would never be able to settle with calling him 'san' just because society did not think he had earned the title 'sensei.' But I knew he was right to call himself that. He had done the impossible. He had saved me from the black hole I had lived in for as long as I remembered. He had dragged me to my feet and given me back my pride and even a little self confidence. He was not just a janitor. He was my sensei. My friend._

"Thanks for all the presents. You really didn't have to do this," I said overwhelmed by the sight in front of me. Apart from the yearly gift card from Tenzou, which he gave all of his employees, I had only been given one gift in my entire life. But now I found myself looking at a table filled with unwrapped presents and all of them were mine. Even if Hidan had taken the line of least resistance by tricking me into picking my own gift, I still felt very appreciated. And I was impressed by the act he had put on. He had really made me believe that we were in fact shopping for a gift for Kakuzu and not me.

"Stop talking like that, it makes you sound like a woman." Everyone around me started chuckling at Zabuza's remark. I smiled discreetly. This was nice. If this was how birthdays were usually like, I could definitely understand why some people had troubles with sleeping, out of sheer excitement, the day they before they could officially round up their age.

We all went to the backyard where Kakuzu was preparing grilled treats in white swimming shorts and a plain black t-shirt.

"I hope you brought your swimsuits," Kakuzu sent us all a smile as we sat down at the backless bench table set and he began serving the food.

As far as I could see, everyone was having a pleasant time with eating and talking. Some took a swim in the pool, but most of us just sat and watched while chilling with a cold beer – including Kakashi, which got me a little worried, but I did not dare to tell him that he should not drink, at least not while Anko was around. She would probably be pretty offended if I assumed that she did not have the situation under control.

Hidan let me know that he had invited a couple of his other friends to join us later in the evening and by 'a couple,' I knew what he really meant to say was that he had invited enough people to fill his entire house. It was pretty cozy hanging around all the guys, who I by the way began to feel a part of since none of them ever used any honorific with me. I had no idea why they did not, but I got the feeling that once you were accepted by one of them, you were accepted by all of them.

The other guests arrived a few hours later and soon the house and backyard were so crowded that you had to struggle to get from one point to another.

I had gotten a little drunk, but tried not to over do it since that typically got me in a situation and I really did not feel like dealing with anything troublesome that night.

Itachi had brought a lot of what-he-never-went-to-a party-without and so many people were smoking it in the packed room we were standing in so I suspected that the smoke from it was starting to effect me, but not nearly enough to make me feel high.

The black haired dealer held out one of his self made joints in front of me, locking eyes with me in that intense way only he could do. I just shook my head and he decided not to push it, luckily, because I was not always making wise decisions when being intoxicated even if it was just lightly.

Itachi had had a pretty much clear head when he first came that day and I had gotten to talk to him a little. He was a pretty cool guy. At least when he was not stoned as he was well on his way to become at this point. I had also talked some more with Asuma and Zabuza than I normally did and they seemed to be fine with me hanging around with the group, which was a relief since to me they appeared to be the hardest ones to get an approval from. Especially Zabuza and it worried me a bit because Kakuzu had tried to make friends with him, but Zabuza did not really respond much to any of the things the tanned man said to him. Did he know about Kakuzu and Hidan and despised them for being together? Or was Kakuzu just not his type of person? I sure hoped that they would work it out because if they could not, it would definitely affect Hidan, even if he would not fully admit it.

When the drunken people and constant smoke screen became a little too much for me, I decided to take a break from the party and go upstairs to rest my eyes for a bit. They were actually on the verge of tearing because of all the smoke they had been exposed to for so long. I was purposely avoiding all the mirrors in the house because I did not want to see my presumably bloodshot eyes.

I established myself in one of the upstairs bedrooms, still holding onto a half emptied beer. A small sigh of relief escaped my lips as I sat down on the edge of the bed, arms resting on my thighs. For a short moment, I closed my eyes and enjoyed the subdued noises coming from downstairs. My sight had not been the only sense I had been worried about losing if I had stayed down there for much longer. I was just as concerned about my hearing.

My life really had been on a roller-coaster for quite some time, but things finally seemed to be getting back into place. I had gotten a bunch of friends, more than I had ever had or dreamt of getting, I was slowly getting content with the fact that I could not afford to live on my own at that time and I was almost ready to begin looking for a new job. It was nice at Hidan's place, but it would be even nicer to get out and live on my own again. I just was not all that thrilled about having to go beg for a job somewhere in the village since everyone would probably know the story of my life by now. Who would want someone like me to work for them? Exactly – none. Tenzou had been the only one who was willing to help me. Not that I did not understand where the others were coming from since I would not hire me if I were them, but that new rumor only made things worse. Damn that Shikamaru.

My free hand curled up into a fist and I gritted my teeth in anger. This scar he was responsible for would be with me forever. Even if I moved away, I would never be able to forget what had happened in the village. I would be reminded of my earlier life every time I looked in the mirror. If I ever saw him again, I swore, I would...

Someone suddenly barged into the room and my sight bounced up to look at the one who had ruined my perfect moment of hate. The interruption was perhaps even more enraging than the thought of Shikamaru alone.

"I thought it was you I saw walking in here!" the man shouted cheerfully and lurched over towards me. I immediately rose to my feet and made myself ready to support the drunken idiot if he needed me to do so.

"Kakashi," I sighed, "you're not supposed to be drinking. You should be more careful."

He looked at me with an arched brow, clearly not sober enough to control his own facial expressions properly. "You sound like Kakuzu," he laughed and crossed his arms, standing with slightly spread legs. He was trying to steady his body, but he kept tipping a little too much to one side, then a little too much to the other. The biggest indicator that he really was inebriated was that he did not even seem to notice his own imbalance that much. "My spleen was fine throughout my entire sickness. As long as I don't drink too often, I shouldn't have to worry. Thanks for worrying, though," he put on a teasing smile, which made me a tad bemused.

"I was not worrying," I answered and looked at anything but him. He was right; I was worried about him, but that was not something a man should admit to another man. It would just make me appear weak as always.

Kakashi stepped closer and a hand reached behind me, slightly stupefying me when I felt my ponytail being tugged out of place. My scalp hurt when my hair was dropping back into its natural position after having been gathered in a ponytail for the entire day.

My eyes met Kakashi's and I stared at him for a moment before speaking. "What are you doing?" I asked guardedly and noted that he too was staring at me.

"It looks festive this way," he chortled as his fingers combed through my hair until he reached my neck where he let his hand rest for a bit.

At that moment, I got the same feeling I had had that night where Kakashi and I had done some questionable stuff. My heart ran wild, I was afraid if I did not hold my breath that I would hyperventilate and my palms became sweaty.

We stared at each others' eyes for a few seconds before Kakashi finally started moving again. He brought his hand away from my neck and led it down into his own pocket instead, quickly pulling out a small envelope.

"I forgot to give you this earlier," he said quietly and handed it to me. I looked down at it confusedly.

"What is it?" He did not answer me and I took my time opening it.

A gift card - to the supermarket where I used to work. Kakashi dozily spoke and my gaze jumped back to him instantaneously.

"It's from Tenzou." My stare wandered down to the gift card again.

So he remembered. Tenzou remembered and he even went through the trouble of getting me a present. Not that it was anything special, but it is the thought that counts and he had no reason to give me anything anymore. I was nigh speechless and I could only be happy that I did not have to face Tenzou right away after receiving his generous gift. Frankly, I would not know what to say. How could I ever repay him for the things he had done for me throughout the years? In a way, I guess he had kind of been like a father to me, or at least I imagined that that was how it would feel like to have a father, and when he fired me, I was furious at him. But it was not his fault and now it was too late to show him how much I appreciated all of his actions. And now this. Did this present mean he was not too disappointed in me for what I had done to Shikamaru? Maybe he did not hate me as much as I thought.

I could not keep myself from smiling. So this was how they had found out about my birthday. It was Tenzou who had told Kakashi.

I looked up in surprise, though the smile was still remained plastered to my face, when Kakashi chuckled. He was staring at me, indicating that his eyes had probably never left my face in the first place and he had seen me put on that goofy smile. I wondered what kind of thoughts my expression gave him. I did not have to wonder for long, though, because suddenly he stepped into my personal space and I felt his alcoholic breath on my face. All those nervous feelings came rushing back and my smile faded.

"Ka-Kakashi?" I stepped backward, my back connecting with the wall behind me. Kakashi followed. "Hey, w-what are y..." He sealed my lips with his and let his hand travel back to its place behind my neck. I instinctively put my hands on his chest and tried to push him away, but I could not get myself to push very hard. Not when he touched me like that.

My head automatically tipped to the side to expose my neck when he began kissing it. I moaned soundlessly, my hands not moving away from his covered chest. So, he was wearing that double mask again. Was that something he always did at parties?

"Ka... ka... shi," I whispered, taking short breaths between every syllable. My imagination was already running loose and images of Kakashi and me together rushed through my head. I had wanted to try and be with him again for awhile and he had taken me by surprise since I had never thought it would actually be repeated. But there we were. "Kakashi, Anko is here too." I laid more pressure on his chest, but he did not step back.

"It's okay." The listless tone in his voice made me think that it was not only alcohol he had made use of that night.

His hands found their way to the edge of my pants and he started fiddling with the button and zipper. His activities caught me off guard. I had not expected him to be so direct neither so fast. He did not leave me any choice at all this time.

"No," I whispered and put my hands on top of his to shove them away, but it ended up being my hands that were removed from his hellbent target. He opened my pants and they slid down to around my knees. Not wanting to waste any time, he immediately went for what my underwear was hiding. I sucked in a quick breath and held it, my hands grabbing his wrists and trying to remove his hands again. "Kakashi, no, I don't want to!" I was getting a little frustrated. I wanted Kakashi, but I knew I could not have him. At least it would not be right. First of all, he had a girlfriend and second of all, I did not want the villagers to be right about me, even though I was aware of the practically criminal thoughts I had about Kakashi and me once in a while. I was stubborn. I did not want the rumors to be confirmed completely.

"I wanna touch you, Iruka." Kakashi was being persistent and I could not get him to back off. Okay, maybe I was not really putting that much effort into my escape, but still. He kissed me before I could protest any further and I let him. My body tensed up, indirectly telling me that I was making a mistake.

I got lost in the moment and before I could count to ten, I was sitting on the bed, legs slightly spread, head thrown back and my hands pressed down the mattress behind my back to support my upper body. Kakashi was leaning over me, one leg lying bended on the bed and the other hanging from the edge of it, the tip of his shoe almost touching the ground. He did not support himself with his arms the way I did, his muscles were what kept him in position, which made me wonder just how strong his torso was for him to be able to sit like that. It was an enigma to me how he could still be so strong after having been sick and not able to train or lift weights for over a month.

Kakashi kissed my Adam's apple as his free hand wandered under my shirt to trace different patterns over my stomach.

"Kami," I whispered and raised my hips into his touch, moaning when Kakashi sped up the pace. What was I thinking? Hidan had already told me this was what happened when Kakashi was drunk. How could I let myself go along with it? I was supposed to keep him from doing something he would regret, even if he did not remember it the next day anyway. But there I was. Selfishly taking whatever he was willing to give me. And I enjoyed it. Very much. "Slow down... P-Please," I wheezed and accidentally gasped when he did the opposite of my request.

I placed one hand on the back of his neck and pressed him down towards me until our foreheads met. My eyes squeezed shut and my teeth clapped together tightly. I was not disciplined enough to ask him to stop anymore. Not when we had already gone this far.

A few single hairs of his silvery nest fell down on my face, tickling my skin. I did not even consider for a second to brush them away. Somehow, they only made the experience even more teasing.

"Are you there yet?" he whispered into my ear and his soft mask brushed against my cheek. I took a few seconds to pull myself together to answer.

"Al... A-Almost. D-Don't s-stop," I stuttered in ecstasy, releasing his neck from my firm grip, leaning a bit forward and moving both my hands to his closed pants. Now I also had to use all of my abdominal muscles to keep myself from collapsing back onto the bed, which was not easy to do when I was not particularly strong and even harder to focus on doing so when he was all over me like that.

I unbuttoned his pants and tried to slide them off his hips, but it was not easy when I did not have much working space.

My hands froze when all of a sudden the door flung open. We both looked at the bosomy figure in the doorway, my eyes almost widening to the point where my they would pop out of my head.

"A-Anko?" I gasped, sounding awfully guilty as a child who had been caught red handed with his hand in the cookie jar.

She looked at us in surprise, her jaw gradually dropping further and further towards the floor.

What am I going to do? I thought and bit my lip, desperately searching my mind for something to say. I could not use the old _'it's not what you think it is'_ phrase since it should be more than obvious to everyone that you did not just end up in the position we were in by accident.

A small drop of sweat, which had been forming on my forehead for quite a while then, trickled down my temple, making me feel even more nervous.

I looked at Kakashi from the corners of my eyes, he seemed atrociously calm considering his girlfriend had just caught us in bed together doing stuff he should not do no matter how you chose to look at the situation.

My eyes glided back to Anko who looked like she was just about to pass out. We were silent for so long that my heart almost jumped out of my chest because of the tension surrounding us.

Finally, Anko gave her reaction, but it was not even near the one I had expected. "Wow!" she started and put her hand in front of her mouth. Was she blushing? "Iruka, you're... huge!" she shouted, closing the door behind her and walked towards us. You could tell she was drunk by the way she was staggering.

I was not only surprised that she did not comment on what we were doing, but the observation she chose to throw at me were rather upsetting as well. Immediately, I pushed Kakashi off me and covered myself with one of the sheets, unfortunately not being able to hide the mad blush that appeared on my face. Why did Anko have to be so unpredictable? I almost wished that she had just slapped us or screamed at us or something. Not point out my size!... Even though it was a quite flattering compliment. I shook my head mentally. No! It was still wrong.

"Who would have thought cute little Iruka was such a big boy?" she giggled and pinched my cheek playfully, but I slapped her hand away before she could get a proper grip. My feelings at that point were rather mixed. I found myself getting a little mad at Anko for interrupting Kakashi and me and especially for saying such inappropriate things to me, but on the other hand, I was aslo scared because actually I was the bad guy here. I felt stressed, confused, aroused and yet not up for sex at all anymore. I felt so many things that I did not even know what to act on.

"Anko, you're ruining Iruka's innocence," Kakashi laughed and turned my attention to him. He really was calm. It was not just something he pretended to be. Did he know she would react like this? What kind of relationship was that?

"And you're one to talk?" she huffed and raised an eyebrow at him, smiling down at us perversely. "So, does this dynamic duo work well for you or do you mind me joining in on the fun?"

I froze again, which seemed to be happening a lot to me whenever I was around them. Could you ever tell anything they were going to do? I do not think so. I for sure had never imagined that she would ask _that_ question. Not even when knowing her erratic persona.

"Sure, we're not shy," Kakashi was answering on behalf of himself _and_ me. Who the hell told him I him I agreed to this? I did not even want to be with him to begin with!... Well, a little, but I did not sign up for both him and his girlfriend. Me in a threesome, Kami, what else could these people drag me into? This had to be the weirdest birthday ever.

"Alright!" Anko squealed excitedly and took off her jacket and shoes before jumping onto the bed. I moved away from them, but I did not get off the bed. I did not dare to, for some reason. It was like there was an invincible cage around the bed and I had accepted that I would not be able to get away. So I just sat there, watching the two of them make out with each other.

What a creeper.

When I could not stand looking at them anymore, I laid down with my back turned against them. They asked me if something was wrong, but I just told them that I was tired and they let me be, fortuitously.

As I lay there on my side with my head on top of my hand, the other one clinging to the cold sheet around me, I began to wonder what it was they were doing behind me. They were not as noisy as they had been to begin with, but the bed was quietly creaking and I could still hear those smacking sounds. If they were doing what I thought they were, I was seriously about to throw up. Were they really having sex when I lay right beside them?

Oh yes, they were; Anko was moaning in a way that could not be misinterpreted. Great, now I did not dare to move at all. I had no other choice but to wait it out.

After they had settled down beside each other, I was still awake. No one would have been able to sleep with those two rabbits going at it with each other. There only passed by a few minutes before I thought I heard one of them snoring and figured it was safe to finish off myself. Please, don not judge me. Try and imagine how painful for me it was to lie there and listen to them when I had just been on the verge of release myself. I was sure that if I did not do anything about it my testicles would most likely burst over night.

Slowly, I led the hand I was not lying on underneath the sheet and down to my crotch. As long as I did not make any noticeable sounds, it would be alright, I figured.

Just before I grabbed myself, the thought of regretting this when I was completely sober again crossed my mind, but I shook the concern away since all I could really focus on was my aching groin.

My eyes shut and my lips parted, a small amount of air being forced out by the pleasure. I kept reminding myself to keep quiet, but it was hard when I knew Kakashi was right behind me and all I could picture while touching myself was him touching me. Those images made me consider sitting on my hand for a while before continuing. I had heard that by doing so, your hand would fall asleep and then when you did... you know... it would feel like it was someone else who was doing it to you. Maybe that would make the image in my head even stronger.

No... No, that would be too weird even for me. A quick release so this feeling of not getting to sneeze when I had to would disappear and I could relax again. That was all I needed for now.

My body slowly began to loosen up when my hand was not as chilled as it had been when I had first brought it under the sheet after it having lain outside my fabric cave for quite a while.

I tried to force the feeling of Kakashi touching me back into my body, but it was hard to create that feeling myself. Only his touch made me feel special in that certain way.

Suddenly, someone started moving around behind me and my fist stopped pumping straightaway. Had they heard me?

I just lay there and listened for a while, trying to decide whether or not they were awake. I felt the back of a hand bump into my back, slowly making its way from one side to the other of my upper body. I turned my head a little to see who it was and stopped moving all together when I looked into Kakashi's eyes.

I blinked a few times, not sure of what to do or how to react when his hand slid down to mine, gently pushing it off my member. When he took control, I squeezed my eyes together again and took in the feeling of his touch.

"We didn't get to finish what we started," he purred into my ear and laid his head on top of mine, pressing his naked body against my back. I could feel his pride poking my spine and my body tensed up once again.

He moved his hand up and down faster and faster and my hand grabbed onto his muscular arm, my legs shifting restlessly around the bed. Was he really doing this to me? I kind of expected that he had already forgotten about me, but apparently he had not. At least not unless I was dreaming, which I was beginning to think I was because I got that insane tickling feeling in my stomach you sometimes get when it feels like you are falling down the stairs just before you fall asleep.

Short moans found their way over my lips even though I was doing my best to hold them back. Kakashi's free hand slid under my neck, his fingers closing around my mouth so my moans would be muffled down by his palm. I grabbed him by the wrist and tightened the grip when suddenly he he placed a kiss under my ear. All I wanted to do was to cry out in pleasure for him, but the pressure over my mouth just increased whenever I slipped a sound.

Kakashi chortled softly, shook my hand off his wrist and took it, leading it to his own mouth, which he opened just enough for him to insert one of my fingers. He sucked, licked and bit it, though he was careful not to hurt me. I breathed out heavily and twisted my neck in delight. At this point, I did not even care if we awoke Anko.

Only a few more strokes were required before my fingers and toes curled together and a pained moan rung throughout the entire room. I had reached my limit.

The man behind me let go of my wet finger and my arm immediately fell down hard at the mattress. I was exhausted and I had not even done anything for Kakashi. Gingerly I turned around to face him. He was smiling at me. Kami, he looked stupid with that holed mask, but that smile really was something.

My eyes curved upwards and an only just visible smile climbed my face as well. I was happy with what had happened, but what now? Would we just turn around and go back to sleep? What about tomorrow? Well, to be honest tomorrow did not worry me that much when looking at Kakashi's drowsy face. He was not going to remember a thing and maybe that was for the best. At least I had gotten to be with him. Just a little.

We did not move out of the spot. I do not think any of us knew what to do, but did not want to be rejecting by turning away from the other. Kakashi was fast asleep. I was not tired so I settled with watching him.

When it hit me that I was not the only one who was naked, I could not stop myself from lifting the sheet a tiny bit so I could look under it. Why Anko had been so impressed with me was now an unsolved mystery to me; it was not like Kakashi was badly armed himself.

My eyes returned to Kakashi's face when I was done peeping at him, just to discover that he was looking at me with an amused look crossing his face. I made my usual poker face – did everything in my power not to give any kind of reaction. He had caught me sneaking a peek. That. Was. Freaking. Mortifying. But Kakashi played it cool and did not say anything. He just went back to sleep.

The next day I woke up feeling more relieved from any pressure than I had been in a long time. My eyes fluttered open and I realized that someone's arms were wrapped around me. I looked down, immediately recognizing the veiny hand that hung loosely in front of my stomach, slightly grazing it whenever I took in a breath of air.

He was so warm. It felt nice being in his strong arms. How was he always able to make me feel so appreciated? So useful, even when he had been the only one doing something to me and not the other way around.

I exhaled restfully, closed my eyes again and pressed myself further into his mild embrace. I did not want to get out of bed yet. I just wanted to lie there with him, although it was going to be awkward once the others awakened. It was fine as long as he stayed by my side just a little longer. Just long enough for me to memorize the feeling of spooning with him.

**My goal for this chapter was to write around 10.000 words and I must say that I was close to doing so! I could have done it, but it just did not seem right to add anymore to the chapter. I would either just end up repeating myself or write something irrelevant to the story. So I chose not to continue because the chapter was done around the 9000 words, which is a length I'll be able to live with giving you after this huge delay. Hopefully you'll accept it as my apology to you *-*!**

**I know I promised that it wouldn't take me too long to update again, but I've had a writer's block – I was uninspired. Apart from that, my exams are in full swing now and have been it for a while. So... yeah... that's my pathetic excuse. I'll try not to make you wait too long for the next chapter and I hope you'll hang in there even if I screw up again ^^!**

**Oh, and this chapter got pretty shitty. When I was first done with it, I was like: I can't present this to anyone? No one deserves to read something this crappy. And then I tried correcting/changing it and I've done that for hours so I'm crossing my fingers now, hoping that it's finally readable :s...**

**By the way, the first one to review this will be my one hundredth reviewer. Do you know what that means? - iiiiit's one shot time! Whoever gets to be the one hundredth reviewer will get a one shot of their own choosing. Just wanted to remind you of that if anyone should have forgotten by now :)**

**Have a nice day! Or night? Anyway, I'll be going to bed now. I have an exam on Monday, which I haven't prepared for yet. Ooops - (I did it again!) xD**

**PS. Huge thanks to all of my readers/reviewers! You make my day every time :D  
>*Special thanks to Chronicxxinsanity for correcting my sometimes intolerable language! Always a pleasure to discuss the English language with you :D!*<strong>


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: I'm terribly sorry for the amount of time you had to wait for this chapter! **

**I owe a HUGE thanks to Adamantyne for helping me out with this chapter. My guess is this would have never been published if she had not taken matters into her own hands xD**

***If you haven't done it yet, don't forget to vote on the Anything Else? poll on my profile page***

**The one shot Top Magician won has been published! If you wanna read it, it's called "Complications" ^^! **

**Chapter 25**

My legs were stretched out and crossed under the table, one arm lying flatly on top of it while the other was supporting my lazy head as I read through the newspaper. Only one headliner had caught my attention that day, but I had never been one to skip articles just to come to the part that I really wanted to read. I had always had this habit of skimming everything through so I was sure I did not miss anything even if the rest of the stuff displayed on the front page had seemed rather boring or less harrowing.

I yawned before taking a sip of my morning coffee. The dark liquid was not going to help me feel more awake since Kakuzu had practically brainwashed Hidan into thinking that normal coffee was not good enough for him. He had said something like, _"It can screw up your digestion and the constant adrenaline rush is not good for your body either,"_ which explained why I was currently drinking that mood killing rubbish – or as you might know it; decaffeinated coffee.

A sigh escaped my lips as I turned another page. Kakuzu wanted us to start drinking green tea instead, but I was never going to let go of my loyal companion. Especially not after I had found someone to share my passion with. Hidan was about the only other person I knew who would rather enjoy a cup of nice, hot coffee than that poor, watery replacement. It was now a matter of principles. Kakuzu-_sensei_ might have taken away my precious wonder drug, but I would never substituteit completely, even if it had lost its special ability. The power it had to keep me awake for an unnatural amount of time.

The longcase clock clanged, implying that Hidan had been away for over an hour already. He had gone to pick up Kakuzu from work and would probably be back within the next 30 minutes or so. Man, life sure could be boring even when living with someone else than yourself, but the focus of Hidan's attention might have been the reason why I felt that way. Two roommates had not been a part of the deal when I first moved in with him, but I should have known the two of them would grow together eventually. It did not seem like anyone beside me had noticed that they were inseparable or at least it did not look like it made a bell ring in any of our friends' heads. Kakashi had not even evinced that he had gleaned the obvious signals the rich kid and doctor sent. Could it really be that I was still the only one who knew?

I shrugged at my own thoughts, took a another sip, then placed the cup back on the table. The article I wanted to read had finally been reached. Hopefully it would be able to keep my mind busy now that I did not have anything or anyone else to entertain me.

"_A young man was brutally attacked Thursday night in an alleyway just outside his own house. According to the police report, the 20-year-old man had been beaten badly from the stomach and up. He had also taken several cuts from an unidentified object. The police claims to know who the man's attackers were due to the noticeable symbol that had been cut into his arm._

"_We suspect that a group who calls itself _the Akatsuki_ is behind this. The symbol carved into the victim was seen on several other people that have been under the same treatment as this latest victim," said the police officer who is currently on the case. _

_The assaulted is the police's only witness to this newest incident. The man told that there were four men present during the assault, but one man alone took part in the actual attack. The latter is described as to be around 190-200 cm. tall with sharp teeth, dull blue hair and a rather muscular appearance. The second man should reportedly have short orange hair with numerous facial piercings. The attacked did not have a detailed description of the last two and could only tell that one of them were a man while the last was a woman. Accordingly to the victim, all of the assailants were wearing long, dark cloaks._

_The head of the investigation warned, "_The Akatuski_ is a dangerous group of presumably mentally ill young men and women. If you see any of their members, stay calm and walk away at normal speed. Making yourself noticeable by running will only encourage them to go after you (...) They are known to wear long, black cloaks with red clouds on them. Also, they are usually seen with some kind of jewelry, which is shaped as an inverted triangle with a circle around it."_

The Akatsuki _is so far accused of several unprovoked assaults and two murders seemingly without any motive. The police believe that it is a cult that gets its thrills by torturing people. They work in groups and mostly appear during the dark hours. Therefore the police advise against anyone walking home alone at night._

_The victim is currently hospitalized with a broken rib and hand. He will be receiving psychological help to help him cope with his trauma before his release that is set to happen in a few days."_

What kind of sick bastards would do something like that? The poor guy would probably not be able to walk the streets in a long time without being scared of meeting someone like them again. The article kind of reminded me of the similar incident I myself had taken part in as the victim. I never reported anything since I did not see any reason for it.Even with his motive, Shikamaru was most likely to be cleared of all charges. Besides, I guess it was just karma. I had been the one to assault him first, after all. And I was not afraid that those men would return. They only attacked me because they were paid to do it, so actually in a way, the situations were very akin. At least not when you looked at it in that way. He would have both mental and physical impairments while I was just barely injured.

Did that mean luck had finally struck me? Should I be happy that the roles had not been reversed? I mean, I was going to survive what I had been through. Even all the mental pressure the villagers had put me under. If things got worse, I could always move. Well, I probably would not, but I still could. The victim in the article would never be able to escape from the angst. He would probably always fear that no matter where he went, something kindred would happen again.

I shook my head lightly and rose from the chair, the paper still suffering under my tight grip. Sometimes I seriously considered to start looking at things on the bright side, but somehow I always managed to turn the situation into something bad no matter how much I wished to be more positive. Well, that was probably just how you got when having been through the things I had. I would end up as a grumpy old fart. That was for sure.

The house was calm and quiet as I walked through the hall to get to my room. It came to me as a revelation when I caught something out of the corner of my eye.

A painting.

A black and purple painting.

Slowly, I turned to face the enormous painting that decorated the first wall you saw when walking into Hidan's house, using the front door.

My eyes tardily dropped to the paper I was still holding onto. With slightly shaky hands, I opened it on the page where I had read about that assault.

"_Also, they are usually seen with some kind of jewelry, which is shaped as an inverted triangle with a circle around it."_

My slinky sight went to the bottom of the article. There was a picture. A picture of the symbol that had been cut into the victim's arm.

"It's the same," I mumbled to myself as I looked back up at the painting. My eyes jumped back and forth from the paper to the painting a couple of times to make sure that it was not just my mind that was playing tricks on me. I soon came to the conclusion that it was in fact not just my fantasy, but those two symbols were exactly like.

Why would Hidan have a symbol like that hanging on his wall if it was used by a group of psychopaths? Did the symbol have some sort of meaning for itself or could you call it _their_ symbol and not just _any_ symbol? Was Hidan secretly a part of this group?

No, what was I thinking? I could not compare Hidan to those people.

Still, regardless of how long I tried to convince myself that he was innocent, I found myself standing in his room in front of his wardrobe, wondering how long I had till he got back.

My hand reached out for the door handle on its own, but I managed to pull it back before I could rip the closet open. _Iruka, stop this, what the hell are you thinking? Even if he is an Akatsuki, are you sure you really want to know? You would not be able to look at him in the same way again. I doubt you would even be able to be in the same room as him. Oh Kami, what the hell do I do?!_

And with that, my body decided on its own. The door was open and there was no way back.

_Do not try to fool yourself. You would not even be able to do any of those things as long as you suspect he is guilty. Just look through his stuff and then you can relax when you do not find anything._

I stood for a moment without moving out of the spot. My eyes not even daring to look at the coat rack. Before I had gotten to take even the slightest peek, I remembered something from the night where Hidan had told me about his parents.

Quickly, I looked over at the nightstand. The piece of jewelry I had seen was not lying there anymore, but that did not change the fact that it had.

The article said _the Akatsuki_ wore jewelry with that symbol and Hidan had one of those. I was sure of it.

My eyes were the first ones to turn their attention towards the closet again, soon followed by my head. The rest of my body remained in place, facing away from the wardrobe.

"Fuck," I whispered, not being able to collect my thoughts.

There it was. The black coat with red clouds.

I had no idea for how long I stood gawking at it, but it must have been for while and apparently I had been so lost in my thoughts that I did not hear Hidan's car parking in front of the house nor hear the front door open or the sounds of someone walking up the stairs. Before I registered that I should get the hell out of his room, he and Kakuzu walked right in on me going through his stuff.

They both put on a muddled look as they watched me try to comprehend the situation I had gotten myself into. I felt how my palms slowly became sweaty, my heart pumping faster against my chest.

Neither of us knew what to say and I understood that under the circumstances it was probably me who should explain myself, but what should I say? I could not tell him that I thought he was a member of some group of freaks who tortured people. Should I play it cool? Run? What about Kakuzu, did he know he was dating a psychopath?

I stepped away from the closet and tried to look at Hidan like I was not about to piss my pants.

"I... I was just lo-looking for my jacket." It was a true fact that I had not seen my jacket in a while and that I had no idea of where it was, but what a pitiful excuse it was for poking about in his wardrobe. He would have to be an idiot to believe that lie.

Hidan raised an eyebrow as he walked up beside me to store his and Kakuzu's jackets. I was following his every move, making myself ready to flee if necessary.

"You forgot it in the car. I thought you knew?" I think Hidan noticed that my eyes were constantly jumping from him to the black coat in the closet because suddenly he looked at it before looking back at me. I swore I saw his eyes narrow in a knowing manner.

My eyes immediately looked at anything but him and the coat. They were restlessly looking for a spot to focus on, but it was hard when Hidan was staring at me like that.

"Hey, Kakuzu?" Hidan caught the tanned man's attention and he hummed in his throat to show that he was listening.

"Do you know how to get rid of blood stains?" My body froze instantaneously. Did he just ask that?

"What? Uh, sure I do. Why?" Kakuzu replied, obviously confused by the pale man's question.

"No reason. By the way, I have a small errand to run later tonight. I was wondering if you would join me, Iruka?"

I looked at Hidan. He was sending me some sort of smile if you could even call that sick lip twist a smile. I gulped carefully, but could not gain the courage to answer. My eyes were slowly widening.

"It's just a small trip to the village. You don't mind, do you?" He turned to face me properly and crossed his arms over his chest impatiently. A trip to the city at night. Alone with him. He knew I had been snooping around. I was positive that I was about to faint. At least I would if it had not been for Kakuzu.

The tanned doctor slapped Hidan in the back of his head, hard. Glaring at him with eyes that could kill. "Hidan, you asshole!" I had never heard Kakuzu use such a firm voice. Definitely not when his words were directed towards Hidan. He was usually so mild with him.

"Ouch, what the hell was that for?!"

"You know very well what that was for! How can you be so atrocious?!"

They screamed at each other for a minute or two before finally turning towards a very confused me.

Kakuzu was still staring daggers at Hidan while the silvery haired man was looking at me apologetically. I did not understand. I probably looked like one big question mark.

"I'm sorry, Iruka," Hidan muttered, bowing before me.

I blinked a couple of times. My eyes really needed that after having been widening for so long. "What are you apologizing for?"

"I'm sorry that I tried to scare you on purpose."

"Scare me? What are you talking about." I felt a blush rushing to my cheeks, but I did my best to keep it from surfacing. I was not scared.

"I saw the newspaper in the hall, I guess you dropped it or something? And when I found you rummaging through my stuff and you seemed to be particularly keen on my coat there, I kinda figured what you were thinking." … I was speechless. Had he purposely tried to scare the crap out of me by pretending to want to kill me? I agreed with Kakuzu then. How big of an asshole could you be?!

"So what is it you think that I'm thinking?" I asked carefully. Hidan raised a brow at me again.

"You thought I was some psycho killer, did not you? Well, I'm not a part of the Akatsuki so you should be safe," he laughed, but stopped instantly when seeing the displeased look on Kakuzu's face.

"Oh, so you're not a member of the Akatsuki, huh? Then what is that awful painting still doing downstairs?" Kakuzu asked accusingly, Hidan bringing his hand to the back of his head to scratch it insecurely.

"Sorry about that, Kuzu, I promise to take it down soon, okay?"

"Do whatever you want, but you know how stupid I think it is, right?"

"Right," Hidan tried to send the other a smile, but Kakuzu only went for the door dismissively.

"I'll go prepare the food. Zabuza should be here soon so why don't you tell Iruka all about it in the meanwhile?" The brunet did not wait for an answer and was out the door before Hidan even got the chance to reply.

I gazed at the platinum blond perplexedly. What were they talking about? I understood absolutely nothing.

"Geez, Iruka, I'm sorry about Kakuzu. He gets a little moody whenever Zabuza is visiting. But don't mind him, he's just nervous." Right now Kakuzu was of my least concern. I was actually more interested in what Kakuzu wanted Hidan to tell me.

We stared at each other for a moment. I had nothing to say and simply kept quiet, hoping that he would somehow get that I really wanted him to clear up things for me. When he did not speak, my eyes wandered back to the cloak behind him. If he was not an Akatsuki, then why did he have those things? The necklace, the cloak, the painting.

Hidan followed my gaze and looked behind himself, ostensibly getting back on track.

"Oh, right, I should tell you what this is all about. Mind if I do it quick, I need to talk to Kakuzu before Zabuza arrives." I shook me head. "Cool," he continued. "Well, truth is that I was once a member of the Akatsuki – not that I'm proud of it, but that's ancillary – and that's why I have the cloak and the painting, which I have to remember to take down because Kakuzu hates me for still having it up when I'm not even a member anymore. I just can't seem to pull myself together to take it down and it means a lot to me since it was a big part of me once and I can't help but be proud that I actually created my own cult, you know? So-"

"Wait. Can you go a little slower? I don't follow you. You mean you founded _the Akatsuki_?" He was ranting like crazy. There was no way that anything was going to be less confusing if he kept up that pace.

"Sorry," he said quickly, just to continue again at the same speed. "Yes, I founded it. I was young and stupid back then. I went kinda crazy after losing my parents and the friends I got myself afterward was not exactly the kind you proudly present to anyone. So I came up with this God called Jashin that was all about pain, basically. But then things got out of hand and some of the members started hurting other people than themselves and the other members and I just sort of dropped out after that since they were taking it too far for my liking. I did not create Jashin to hurt innocent people. I created him to deal with my own problems, well, I guess it was quite the alternative way of dealing with the pain I felt by the loss of my parents. No, wait, there are some people who hurt themselves physically to cope with emotions, right? What is it they are called? Uuh, I can't remember, but that's doesn't matter anyway. I'm not a part of the group anymore and I have absolutely nothing to do with them at all. Period."

Yet again I had to blink a couple of times to try and realize what he had just said. His story was beyond my wildest imagination.

"You... created a religion?"

Hidan nodded, still trying to catch his breath from his latest harangue.

"And you formed a cult that worshiped that fictitious God?"

I received another nod.

"But your fellow members took the self harm too far and then you quit?"

"No, not exactly. They probably took the self harm a little too far as well, but that's only because in order to hurt others, you must also be able to hurt yourself at equal strength. But we were only meant to hurt ourselves and each other and that's when Pain and me did not agree."

"Pain? Is that his real name?" It was a stupid question when you thought of all the other things Hidan had told me, but the strange name was about the only thing I could comprehend. Everything else was just too... weird?

"No, that psycho even changed his name. Pretty sick, huh? He was my best friend and he was even the one to officially welcome me into the Akatsuki."

"But... I thought you founded it?"

"Sure, I did, but everyone had to go through a ritual to become a full member. Even I had to. See this?" He turned his head and pointed at his left ear. That rip in his ear had bothered me ever since I had first noticed it. Was I finally going to get an explanation for it? "I had an earring there, but I made him rip it out."

I wrinkled up my nose in disgust. How could he let someone do that to himself? It must have hurt like crazy. "Why?"

"I had to come up with a concept for the welcoming ritual and I just said the first thing that came into my mind, which meant everyone had to do something similar that would scar them forever in order to become a member. I know, it's stupid, but as said, I was young and dopey."

"You're right. That _is_ pretty stupid." It slowly felt like I could start to relax again. Hidan had been fucked up, but got over it as he grew older. That kind of story was very familiar to me.

"Yeah, but it's all past now. We were just a bunch of kids, trying to cope with our pain. I'm just glad I got out of there before it was too late."

"How did Kakuzu find out?"

He chuckled, "He had treated some of _the Akatsuki_'s victims so he knew the symbol and when he saw it he started questioning me pretty heavily since he did not wanna be involved with an Akatsuki member, which I guess is pretty understandable. Especially when he's all about helping people."

"But aren't you blaming yourself for those people who died or was attacked by _the Akatsuki_?"

"Me? No, I did not kill anybody, they did. It's not my fault that they are stupid enough to believe in a God that an 18-year-old kid made up. In fact, I'm kinda proud that something I made became this big and that someone is actually worshiping Jashin. My ideals were nothing like the ones _the Akatsuki_ live by now. If I had not made that cult, they would probably just have become a part of some street gang and end up beating up people anyway."

I could see the point Hidan was trying to make, but still, if I had been him, I do not think I could have pretended to have a clear conscience. I would always feel like I was partly to blame. But maybe it was necessary for him to think like he did in order to be able to live with himself. I felt kind of sorry for the guy. He had been through a lot and never had there been anyone to help him. At least it did not sound like that aunt of his had been very helpful to him. She had probably just let him stay with her to keep a clear conscience herself.

"Did you hear that?" Hidan's outburst dragged me back to reality from my flow of thoughts. "I think I just heard a car. It's probably Zabuza. Damn, now I don't have time to talk with Kakuzu! Hey, could you maybe stall him for me? It will only take a minute."

I nodded and sent him a small smile, wondering if our little conversation had not touched him one bit or if he was just pretending that it did not.

"Sweet. Hey, are you gonna watch American football with us tonight?"

"I might join," I answered as we made our way out of his room.

I could not exactly claim that I was thrilled by the thought of having to stall Zabuza nor spend the evening with him. The thought of being alone with that guy was actually more frightening than what Hidan had just told me. Somehow his Akatsuki background seemed like nothing compared to Zabuza. I just never knew what to say when he was around. And he did not talk much to me either – unless of course he was in a complaining mood. Oh well, what you are not willing to do for friends.

The evening went better than expected. Zabuza settled with screaming at the television instead of the rest of us, which was pretty uncommon and very fortunate since Hidan was about the only one who would not be on the verge of mental break down once Zabuza finished his daily rebukes.

During half-time, Hidan brought in another round of beers to celebrate that the team they were voting for had taken the lead. I still did not get which team were which and frankly I did not care all that much. American football and actually any sport in general had never really caught my interest. I was not sure what Zabuza's reasons for watching it were. I figured that Hidan liked it because he was half-American and had lived there for some time. But Zabuza? As far as I knew, there were not any Japanese or even Asian football teams. At least not any that had made it to the big league. He seemed to enjoy the violence, though, so that was probably why he chose to watch something like that over any normal Japanese sport. Maybe I was just being a tad too patriotic, but was not it better to support our own sports than America's? They had enough ass-kissers already.

Kakuzu agreed with me. Not for the same reasons, but it still counted. He just did not like the brutality of the game. It was pointless, he had said.

"Cheers!" Hidan exclaimed and touched bottles with Zabuza before sitting back down beside him on the couch. Kakuzu sat smiling in the arm chair opposite mine, taking a sip of his organic beer. Zabuza had already pointed out how gay he thought the kind of beer Kakuzu drank was, but the tanned man had only looked at Hidan who chuckled along with his friend. Both Kakuzu and me knew Hidan meant nothing bad with his actions, it was simply his way of interacting with Zabuza.

Nobody said anything for a moment so Kakuzu decided to try and make a conversation with Zabuza again. I was thankful to him. It was not like any of us enjoyed sitting in silence, watching the commercials. "So, has anything happened lately?" he asked and glanced at everyone though mainly the tall, pale man next to Hidan.

Hidan knew the question was not directed towards him so he remained silent while I just shook my head. Those two knew right about anything that happened in my life while I too knew what happened in theirs. Would be pretty empty talk if any of us answered. Only Zabuza would be able to gain something from the conversation then.

The tall man luckily did not fail to answer. Not that any of us had been worried that he would not have something to complain about.

"Two of my windows were smashed last night so I had to sleep with only a pair of thin chip boards covering them," he kvetched and crossed his arms, his stout remaining in one hand.

"Do you know who did it?" Hidan leaned back in his seat and looked at Zabuza with a raised brow.

"Probably some of those brats from the orphanage." He did not look very pleased when speaking that last word.

I could not help myself. "Why do you think that?" Everyone's attention turned to me. They probably never imagined that I would have joined the conversation. At least not at this early point. But I had never told any of them about my life story. If I had, they would know that I had a lot to say in this matter.

"That's the stupidest question I've heard in a long time. It's always them. They don't have any parents so there's no one to bring them up properly. No one to teach them right from wrong."

"Well, that's some assumption. Don't you think you are coarsening it just a tiny bit?" My voice was gelid and quizzical. I did not intend it to come out the way it did, but it was simply just too hard for me to hide my true emotions when it came to that particular subject.

"Pfft, don't you think you are just a tiny bit ignorant?" Zabuza mocked. "Everyone knows it's a fact that those kids can't control themselves. They are begging for attention and using all the wrong methods to get it. See, if it was up to me, those parasites would all be gathered on an island and then they could carry out their criminal deeds without us normal people having to suffer from it." The tall man laughed uproariously, making me want to slap him right on the nose.

"Hey, those children are no different from any other children!" I raised my voice greatly and pointed admonitory at Zabuza who just frowned and leaned forward in his seat to meet my warning glare. I noticed that Kakuzu was suddenly finding a great interest in fiddling with the sleeve of his shirt while Hidan was just gawking at us curiously.

"You sure are naïve, Iruka," he growled in a dangerously low tone.

"And you're a supercilious idiot." My choice of words seemed to take everyone by surprise and to be honest, I was a bit astounded myself.

"Oookay, I think you've both proved your points. Should we get back to the game?" Hidan asked and looked at both of us shiftily, but we did not even pretend to be listening to him.

My palms went moist and sweat threatened to appear on my forehead. Those were the first monitory signals, telling me that I should back down immediately if I did not want the quarrel to turn into something I would regret later. But I could not. Zabuza had no right to say such things. At least if he had, then I had the right to express myself freely too.

"Orphaned children has the right to be here just as much as anyone else if not more. Do you have any idea of what those kids are going through every single day of their life, huh? Oh shit, I forgot, you don't care about anyone else than yourself!" Zabuza lowered his head and looked at me furiously. If getting personal was the only thing that seemed to make my words come through to him, I was ready to label him anything regardless of how savage I had to become.

"I'm just looking out for myself. Besides, why should I be saddled with those children when the only reason why they don't have any parents to begin with are because no one wants them?" He was being harsher than usual. Or maybe not. It could just be that it felt worse when his judging words were literally directed towards me. It did not matter. I would not let Zabuza win this time.

I snorted at his anserine remark. "How stupid can a person be?"

"What the hell is your problem, Iruka? All I'm saying is that they do _not_ belong here!" My eyes widened and I felt a pain in my mouth when I realized I was grinding my teeth. Blood was pumping through my vein faster than before. This was not good.

"What?!" I snarled, taking a step back when Zabuza rose to his feet to level with me. I had not even noticed that I had positioned myself in front of him. Kami, this definitely was not good.

"I said, they. do. not. belong. here." He was speaking slowly and clearly as if I was imbecile, needing everything to be cut out in cardboard.

"_You don't belong here!"_

"Guys, sit down, please," a small, annoying voice interrupted from the sideline. It was Hidan again.

A tremendous expand of my lungs occurred as I in- and exhaled menacingly. My mouth was watering. He had crossed the line. "Care to repeat that one more time?" I hissed through my teeth, staring at him provokingly.

"Is it even necessary?" he spat, glowering right back at me with those dark, blazing eyes.

I was seeing red and I could not stop my fist from hitting out at Zabuza. The smacking sound of flesh clashing with flesh rung throughout the living room and soon my body was forcing Zabuza's back till we both tumbled over behind the couch. The three-piece suite was then no longer an obstacle and we had the entire living room as our own personal wrestling ring.

"Say it again!" We got back up on our feet and Zabuza directed a punch towards my face while I was still trying to get a foothold, but he must still have been a little disorientated after that first blow because I only needed to jerk my head a bit to the side for him to miss.

I repaid the compliment by sucker punching his gut.

"Iruka, calm do-" I punched him once.

"_You don't belong here!"_

I punched him twice.

"_Oh right, I almost forgot – you don't have any parents."_

Trice.

"_Loser!"_

And another.

"Iruka, stop!" Hidan dragged me away from Zabuza.

"I dare you to say it again!" I screamed with closed eyes, fighting the best I could to get out of Hidan's firm grip. I was not very much aware of my surroundings.

"Calm down, damn it!"

"Zabuza, are you alright?!"

"Get him out of here, Kakuzu!"

I panted and taunted at Zabuza, not really noticing that he was not even in the room anymore.

"Iruka, stop it, calm down!" Hidan tightened his grip, but I finally managed to break free, stomping with rapid steps towards my room, still not actually registering what was going on around me.

**oOo**

There were a few knocks on the door before the person behind it cracked it open carefully.

I was standing with my back against the individual entering. Judging by the way the throat was cleared, I figured it was a man.

A moment went by without anything happening, but then someone lay their hand on my shoulder and I snapped, turning around on my heels and pushing the person away from me with such force that he stumbled backwards, falling to his bottom.

When I looked up at the man I had practically attacked, I finally returned to reality.

"Kakashi?" I whispered, staring at him without moving out of the spot. He got back up on his feet and did not complain one bit about my assault.

"Are you alright?" he asked when he walked up beside me.

I took a look around the room, having a bad feeling about the situation already after gazing at the first thing in my field of vision. A broken chair.

Kakashi immediately spotted the puzzled look I was wearing and again placed a hand on my trembling shoulder.

"Sit." My eyes glided back to the silver haired man in front of me. He was motioning for me to take a seat in probably the only thing that was not completely destroyed in the room.

I hesitated, but eventually did as told and I was soon joined by him.

A painstaking smile appeared on his face as he spoke, "Feel like telling me what this is all about?" His voice was so calm and caring. I could not help but stare at him, which I ended up doing for quite a while before finally giving him a small nod.

**oOoOoOoOo**

**And then I returned from a less productive summer vacation!**

**I'm really, really sorry for keeping you waiting. I know, I'm a terrible author :(...  
>I'm no longer gonna promise you fast updates just because it's a promise that can easily be broken. But I'll definitely gonna try!<strong>

**I'm finally feeling confident about Anything Else? again. Ever since Adamantyne and I read the entire story through, I started feeling less discouraged about the stories progress and my written language. Now, I'm not trying to pat myself on the shoulder, but last chapter's language was a huge betterment compared to all the other chapters. So now that I can see that I'm actually getting something out of writing this, my head is back in the game. Also, I've finally come to the chapters that I've been dying to write ever since the beginning of the story xD! **

**Be prepared - Iruka is about to reveal the story of his life!**

**Oh, and again, please vote on the Anything Else? Poll on my profile :D **

**Planning on writing an exclusive extra chapter with the winning characters once the story is done. So better vote if you have an opinion ;D**

**By the way, I think we should all show Adamantyne some appreciation by reading her story "No" - and "Problematisk" if you're Danish or don't mind reading through google translate (- we tried; it's actually a pretty good translation it came up with xD!)  
>I'm pushing her to finish one of the stories she's still writing so hopefully there will be more from her soon. I love her written language and she has a special talent for psychoanalyzing characters so you can always expect top stories from her. Unfortunately she's new to the Naruto fanfiction world and so she only has two stories (plus she deleted her wrestling stories -_-' so, yeah, her story list doesn't look like much, but it will sooner or later! Believe me, she really is an amazing writer!)<strong>

**Hope this chapter was enjoyable enough. I'll return again ASAP!**


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

_**Part 1**_

The closet was claustrophobic. Sometimes it felt like I could not even breathe in there despite that it was a lattice door. There was no way of telling how long I had been detained since I had lost track of time a while ago. The kicking, punching and screaming never bore fruit. No one had come to my rescue. I just sat there, desolated.

By the time someone finally came to remove the padlock, I was so distressed that I had not even noticed my freedom had been returned.

"Are you alright?" The soft voice came through to me with ease and I looked up with teary eyes at the yellow haired janitor who stood right before me.

I was not sure if I could trust that man. I had seen him around school a million times, but that did not mean he was different from the others. And why should he be? Even the janitor was more acknowledged than I was.

But the prudent smile he flashed eventually persuaded a diminutive nod out of me.

I sniffed before taking the hand he graciously offered and he dragged me to my feet in one effortless motion.

"What happened?" he asked, squatting down in front of me. For some reason, I did not feel as distrustful towards him as I did towards most others, though I still could not make myself say the words.

Suddenly, a hand lay on the top of my head, caressing my hair in a reassuring manner I had never experienced before. His eyes were examining me and I was sure he took note of the exsuccous spit on my faded clothes.

The janitor's lips parted purportedly to utter something, but my stomach manifested its malcontent impatience before the yellow haired man could even make a sound. He looked at me in amusement as he stood up straight again.

"Sounds like your belly could use some ice cream, don't you think?" A shameful blush dusted my cheeks a bright red when he confirmed that he had noticed my stomach's complaint.

Why was this man inviting me out for ice cream? People usually just laughed at me whenever my tummy growled. It was not even aberrant for them to ask – with a mocking tone dominating their vocalism – if the guardians at the orphanage did not feed me properly. In fact, they took every possible chance they got to remind me that I did not have any parents, unlike them.

"I just have to fix the lights in here, then I'm done, okay?" I nodded, not knowing what else to do.

He asked me to turn off the lights for him. After that, he explained to me how everything worked. What every wire meant and led back to. What made the light bulb give out light. Why there were different types of light bulbs and all sorts of things no one had ever cared to teach me about. I had not even asked, he told me everything out of his own free will.

Whenever he looked down at me, he chuckled before turning his attention back to the ceiling. In the beginning, I did not understand what was so funny, but later I understood that the fascinated, almost enchanted look on my face must have looked pretty funny given the situation. I was probably the first one ever to pay attention to his work. But why would not I? He was the first one to pay attention to me too.

He finished off the last light and went down from his ladder, putting on a satisfied smile when I turned on the lights again to check if his work had been successful.

"Thanks for the help. You and I make a great team, don't you think so?" That was probably the biggest compliment anyone had ever given me.

But why was he the one thanking me? I should be the one thanking him because to tell the truth, he had taught me more in those few minutes we had spent together than any of my teachers ever had. Even if I would never understand all the things he told me, he still took the time to explain things a second if he could see that I was lost. No one ever explained things twice to me.

"Ready to go for that ice cream?" He folded up the ladder and took it under one arm, glancing at me while doing so. I did not answer, only stood gawking at him stupidly.

He, of course, could not help but laugh, but not in that vicious or derisive way everyone else did it. He sounded... halcyon?

With a friendly push to the back, he directed me towards the door.

**oOoOoOoOoOoOo**

"Hey, Iruka-chan!" I was running down the school hall when someone familiar shouted my name. Quickly, I turned on my heels and I immediately locked eyes with the yellow haired janitor, Minato, who stood waving a few meters away from me. "Wanna go to the park with me after school today?"

"O-Okay," I stammered and glanced up at the hall watch. "I'm sorry, but I have to go. I'm late already." I bowed before running off towards my classroom. Minato shouted something like 'see ya' later!', but there was no time for me to turn around and reply to him.

Once I entered the classroom, I had worked up a good sweat from spurting all the way from the orphanage to the school. My ponytail was a mess, there were sweat spots on my shirt and my face was completely red.

"Late... again."

I bowed to my teacher and apologized while still trying to catch my breath. "I'm s-sorry, Sasori-sensei. I-I promise it wo-won't happen again." All of my classmates started snickering when I stuttered, but that was nothing new so I simply tried not to let it bother me even though it did and they were fully aware of it. Hiding my feelings had always been a big challenge to me.

"You say that every time, but when's it gonna happen? Have you no respect for your fellow students?" My red haired teacher glared at me furiously and I did not know what to respond.

If there was one thing he could not stand, it was to be kept waiting. He always told me that it was disrespectful to show up in the middle of class and interrupt my classmates concentration just because I did not know the clock. I knew the clock and I was not trying to be disrespectful, but that was what Sasori told me and since I was only a kid and I did not have any parents, there was no way I could ever confront him with those things. I just had to stand and take whatever he threw at me.

"What, you can't even answer when being asked something?" He shook his head in disbelief and motioned for me to go to my seat. He was not going to let me disrupt class more than I already had.

With my chin pressed against my chest in defeat, I made my way through the classroom, but when I got to a certain bandana wearing boy's seat, a foot tripped me and I fell to floor, dropping all of my stuff.

Everyone started laughing and Sasori turned around to look at my pathetic body that lay spread across the floor. "What now?!" he yelled angrily.

"Iruka tripped himself, sensei," Mizuki said with a wide smile crossing his face as our eyes met. I hated that guy. He was the popular one who rarely got into any trouble because his head was too far up most our teachers' asses for them to notice that he was actually the one always causing a fuss. But if a teacher like Sasori, who did not take sides with any of the students, tried to complain about Mizuki, his rich father always managed to "talk some sense into the principle," as Mizuki would proudly state whenever it had happened over the years.

"He seems to be doing that a lot around your table lately." The suppressed tone Sasori spoke in was easily understood by all the students. He always tried to hold himself back since his fits of anger had nearly cost him his job several times already. "Why don't you come and sit by my desk for the rest of the lesson? Maybe then Umino-chan will finally stop interrupting my class."

Mizuki looked like he was being treated unfairly and Sasori probably already knew that he was going to have one of those long talks with the fair haired boy's father again. How Sasori managed to still be employed was a mystery to everyone. He had to have an even stronger personality than we all thought.

I gathered my things and sat down at my seat, receiving deadly glares from Mizuki who had switched places with Kotetsu who usually sat next to the teacher's desk so they could keep an eye on him. He had played one too many pranks on Sasori and afterward the red haired teacher had went to the principle and convinced her the seat he had given Kotetsu should be permanent and apply to all classes – even the ones he did not teach. Sasori could be strict and that usually was not a benefit for me, but in cases like Kotetsu's, it was. At least after being given that seat, he was not able to play pranks on me anymore. I seemed to be his favorite target and with Mizuki being seated next to him, the platinum blond only got Kotetsu even more riled up on the idea of tormenting me.

After class, I went to meet up with Minato, but he was not ready to go yet and told me I should just wait for him outside on the playground.

When I had sat alone on the swing for around five minutes, a girl from class walked up to me. I stared at her, waiting for her to say something, but she only stared right back. I could not figure what it was she wanted since we had nothing in common and that was actually our first encounter. Well, not exactly. But it was our first encounter without any of her friends being around.

She looked a little pale, though I did not think she was sick. Rather frightened or something?

"Are... Are you o-okay, Ha-Hana-chan?" I asked, getting off the swing. That was when I noticed she was slightly taller than me. Actually, that was not such a big surprise since most girls were taller than all the boys in my class. One of our teachers had told us that it was because girls went into puberty faster than boys, but we never knew if he was telling us the truth or not since he immediately changed the subject when Izumo asked what puberty was.

"I'm okay," she answered and bit her lip. Why was she being so strange? Hana Inuzuka was not one to talk loudly, but she had never been the shy type either. "Iruka-chan..." She paused and looked down at her feet. When she looked up again, her cheeks had gone pink. "Can I talk with you alone for a second?"

I took a look around us. There only were a couple of children from the daycare center present and they were all the way over at the sandbox. Why did not she consider this private enough?

"Uhm... O-Okay." She sent me that pretty smile that was usually only reserved for Izumo. I went weak at the knees within a few seconds. Why was she smiling at me like that? She had never done it before so why now? And she was so pretty. None of the pretty girls ever deigned me a single look.

"Cool." She took my hand and pulled me towards the janitor's workshop. Did she also know that Minato was not there at the moment? I only wondered about that for a moment because suddenly I found it hard to concentrate. Her hand was so warm and soft. I could not keep myself from giving it a small squeeze. Luckily, she did not seem to notice.

She finally glanced back at me after having been dragged along her for almost a full minute. Our hands were perspiring by the time she let go of it. I was a little disappointed, to say the least. In that short period of time we had walked together, my hand had already started feeling comfortable in hers. I did not want to let go, but it was too late to cling to it.

For a moment we stood without saying anything. I was primarily sending the floor awkward gazes until she finally spoke and I looked back up at her. She looked so mild. Those big, almost black eyes shyly glancing at me from time to time.

"I want to tell you something, Iruka-chan." She smiled bashfully and looked down at the floor like I had done. "I like you. And... I want to be your girlfriend." At that moment, it felt like I had gotten struck by lightning. My heart started beating faster, my palms went even sweatier and it felt like I was on the verge of passing out. Was she saying what I thought she was? She could not.

I swallowed hard, staring at her like it would mean the end of the world if I looked away. There was only one but. "Yo-You like Izumo," I stated, feeling stupid for saying it out loud. Why was that the only thing I could come up with when a girl had just declared her love to me? Was it because she was the first one my age to ever show any genuine interest in me? It was just so overwhelming and she was so pretty. I could never even hope to hold a candle to her.

She seemed rather offended by my sudden statement and put on a pout, pretending like she was not blushing madly. "I don't like Izumo!" How had she gone from gentle and loving to that angry in so little time? Why was she even getting mad over it if she did not like him?

"Oh... I-I'm sorry. I mu-must have misunderstood."

"Yeah and I already told you it's you I like. So do you wanna be my boyfriend or not?" She was getting impatient and since this was my first chance ever at making friends with one from my class, I should not waste it on stuttering incoherent things. She was right after all. If she liked me, she could not like Izumo too, right?

"O-okay." My cheeks felt hotter than ever and I was afraid that I would stop being able to breathe at any minute. I had a girlfriend; I could not wait to tell Minato about it!

She finally put on a smile again and my knees went right back into that wobbly state. "Good. Do you know how to kiss?"

I looked at her with amazement. Kiss? I had never given kissing any thought since I had never been close to getting a girlfriend. I knew some practiced in front of the mirror and things like that, but I had not practiced. Now what?! Would she be disappointed? She had probably kissed lots of boys before. I was so inexperienced. I had not prepared for something like kissing. How embarrassing!

The confusion must have been written all over my face because suddenly she said, "You do know couples kiss, right?"

"Of co-course," I answered quickly. If I ended up scaring her away, I would hate myself forever.

"Alright. So, do you know how to kiss? If you don't that's totally okay." With a head shake, I ignominiously admitted that I had never been kissed or kissed anyone in my entire life.

I was happy to discover that she did not seem less impressed even if I had not.

"Fine, I'll show you then. First you have to close your eyes." I did as told immediately, my body nearly trembling with excitement. "Cover your eyes with your hands." That second thing sounded a little odd. I had seen people kiss before and I did not remember ever seeing someone with their hands covering their eyes. But maybe Hana was just shy and wanted to make sure that I did not look when we kissed. Nevertheless, I did as she said.

Seconds felt like minutes and I was slowly getting restive. I wanted to tell her to hurry, but I knew you were not supposed to say something like that to a lady so I kept my mouth shut and instead wished that she would not keep me in such suspense.

"Now, pucker up," she demanded lightly, letting her hand brush down my arm for a fleeting moment. Her touch was enough to send chills down my spine and give me goosebumps all over my body.

How did she even manage the waiting time herself? I was so nervous I could burst. In a way, I was not even sure what excited me the most; the fact that I was about to get my first kiss or that I could tell Minato about it afterward?

Finally, I felt something wet and smooth against my lips. Perhaps too wet and smooth? I had felt my own lips before with my fingers and that was definitely not what it felt like. Without thinking further about it, I opened my eyes and parted my fingers so I could peek out from behind my hands. It was a nauseating sight that met me.

With a shriek, I jumped backwards and looked around myself in surprise. They were all there. Everyone from my class... and they were laughing.

"Man, I really thought that would've worked!" Mizuki complained, taking a step towards me while practically showing my kissing buddy back into my face. "I guess you're not even good enough to be a real _princess_," he stressed the last word in the most mocking tone he had ever spoken to me.

I felt tears making their way to my eyes as I tried to get the sticky goo off my lips with the sleeve of my shirt. Mizuki dropped the frog on the ground and it jumped away as fast as it could.

"So, how was it, Iruka? I hope it was good because we're all pretty disappointed that you weren't able to turn that frog into a prince. We figured there was something someone like you would be good at, but no, you couldn't even pull this off." I turned my back to him and tried to keep my tears from falling all while choking on the sobs that were gathering as a lump in my throat. It hurt, but I did not want to cry.

"Leave me alone," I bleated, being taken by surprise when Mizuki shoved me so hard that I fell to the ground, scraping my knee against the asphalt in the process.

"What did you say? You shouldn't talk to me like that. Especially not when I just helped you get your first kiss! You would never have gotten one if I had not been here!"

"I bet the frog is throwing up right now!" Kotetsu joked, the entire class burst out laughing.

"Please, just go away!" Mizuki was not happy about my protest and decided to pick up a rock and throw it at me.

"Stop being ungrateful, Iruka!" he shouted and threw another. I held my arms protectively up in front my face and shrank together as everyone else followed his example.

"You don't belong here!"

"Nobody would ever want to kiss you!"

"Poor frog, I feel sorry for it!"

"Stop it, please!" I cried, cringing whenever a rock hit me.

"Hey, he's coming!" Izumo yelled suddenly and everyone fled from the scene.

I could no longer keep my emotions contained. Tears flowed down my face, sobs escaped loudly. Why me? I never did anything to make them mad and yet I was the only one they desired to anguish. Was it because I was an easy victim?

Snot irked me when trickling down my philtrum so I wiped it away and sniffled hard to prevent it from happening again.

"Iruka-chan?" I did not want him to see me in that state again. His words were always comforting, but he the look he gave me were so filled with pity and it only made me want to cry even harder.

When he tried to get eye contact with me, I promptly hid behind my arms.

Before I could react, he picked me up from the ground and went inside his workshop. He placed me on a chair and he immediately began to cleanse the newly acquired wound on my knee. For a long time, the only thing breaking the silence were my occasional sobs, which slowly began to fade while he treated my broken skin. Everything felt less hurtful when he was around.

"You shouldn't let them do this to you," he said calmly, making me look down at him. He was not looking at me, only focusing on my knee. "They won't stop until you draw the line. Start fighting back a little."

I sniffled and shifted around a little on the chair until he placed a hand on my thigh, indirectly asking me to sit still. "What do you me-mean?"

"If they say something hurtful, do the same to them. If they hit you, return the favor. I don't see anything wrong with that. After all they have done to you, a dab would only be in its right place."

"So... You want me to hi-hit Mizuki?" The wound stung when Minato applied a Band-Aid to it. The yellow haired man the got up from his kneeling position and looked down at me.

"You shouldn't injure him or anything. Just don't submit to their teasing so easily. They will never show you respect if you don't give them a reason to do so."

I nodded understandingly and he gave my hair an affectionate ruffle.

A few month later, I had been in a physical fight with Kotetsu, verbal quarrel with Izumo and answered back at Mizuki. I was sent home after both the first and second incident. The latter did not end that way. It had a similar ending to the times before Minato taught me how to fight and answer back, but I did not take it too hard because Minato had also taught me not to listen to their hurting words. It did not always work to ignore them, though. Sometimes they were still able to reach me – Mizuki in particular – but I did not cry as much anymore and so I felt proud of myself. Hana even came to apologize to me, but I knew she could not be trusted so I told her I did not care. She was not going to play anymore tricks on me. I was strong now. I was more confident than ever.

**oOoOoOoOoOo**

**Whoop, whoop! Guess who's getting faster at updating! Yes, I am xD!**

**Normally, I don't use the (oOoOoOoOo) unless we have reached the end (A/N). I only use (oOo) when the time skips. But since these time skips and the ones there will be in the next chapter are WAY bigger skips than the usual (oOo) implies, I'll be using the (oOoOoOoOo)  
>- if you get what I mean xD?<strong>

**You wanna hear something annoying? I just went through ALL the chapters of Anything Else? with Adamantyne to correct them for mistakes and such. Now guess what. The corrections we made were NOT saved... I was on the verge of exploding when discovering that so I have to go through everything again – which means all the mistakes won't be corrected anytime soon. They will sometime, though, so sorry for any new readers who had to go through that load of shit; better known as all the previous chapters of this fic. I'm very sorry!**

**I also have good news, though, at least for the ones who follow this fic and wants to get on with it *sweatdrop* hehe xD  
>Wait for it... Wait for it...<br>Yes! I'm gonna update either later today (since it's past 12 o'clock at my place and therefore already Sunday xD) or I'm gonna update first thing Monday.  
>Next up: Chapter 27: Iruka's past – part 2. (Final part, by the way xD)<strong>

**Issuing a challenge to my readers:  
>The more reviews (and votes on my Anything Else? poll) I get, the faster the update is gonna come.<br>Challenge accepted?  
>- I'm just curious to just how many are actually reading this fic. Especially because the hits count can be very misleading. And I'm always VERY curious to know what you think of the story and if there's anything I could do better and so on *-*<br>****  
>Aaaand because I was just a pleading whiner, I'm gonna make up for it by writing on the 28th chapter right away. Does that help? Does that make me less of a loserannoying whiner?  
>- probably not -_-' But anyway, the next chapter is written and will be published VERY soon and<strong>** t****he 28th chapter is already in progress. I hope now that you can forgive me for totally slacking this fic for the past months. Gomen!**

**Just two more things, then I'm done, promise!**

****First of all, I was searching around DeviantArt here the other day and found something very interesting... Someone made a freaking piece of fanart for Anything Else?!  
>Here's the link (without the dashes, obviously) h-t-t-p-:--/-fav-.-me-/-d56j4j0  
>I'm so honored that you can't even put it into words just how honored I am! I just wish she would have told me since I would never want to miss out on something like this! (- not because she needs my permission or anything! Feel free to draw Iruka from Anything Else? It's Kishimoto and not me who owns him so it's not like I have any power in that matter anyway xD!) Thanks for making this incredible piece of art, Zanezell155. You're amazing :D!**<strong>

**Oh, I also made my own fanart for Anything Else? a long time ago so if you wanna have a look, here's the link: h-t-t-p-:-/-/-fav-.-me-/-d508wt2**

**Second, Adamantyne finally published another one shot in English called "Luxuria" with Shikamaru and Hinata as the head characters. You should check it out. I can't even begin to tell you how much I look up to her as an author *-* Her English is way better than mine, unfortunately for some*cough* me *cough* and he stories are always so interesting to read. Our new English teacher are probably gonna hate us once school starts again. I'm more combative than ever so look out, Adamantyne! English class will now be our battlefield xD**


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

_**Part 2**_

The blonde girl ran her thin finger over my chapped lips while whispering promises in my ear. She was older than me. Actually a lot older since only a year's difference could easily seem like three when you were still under 20. At first, I did not know what she wanted with me, but I figured it out pretty quickly when reminding myself of exactly where I was.

"Find someone else. I'm not sharing," I stated blankly and shoved her away so I could return to my spoon, but apparently, she had already made up her mind and she was not going to give up without a fight.

Her hand slipped in between two buttons of my shirt and she caressed the bare skin underneath the fabric. "Don't hold yourself back, I know you want to," she purred and grazed my chest with her long, black nails.

"I'm not interested."

People were constantly walking in and out of the room. Only a few settled down and stayed for more than just five minutes. I looked up and noted that a black haired guy was sitting with his back against the wall, looking more relaxed than anyone I had ever seen in my entire life. I did not know him personally, like all the other people there I had never bothered to get involved with, but I had seen him around the youth center quite often lately.

The youth center was not to be mistaken with one of those professional ones with at least some sort of supervision, administration and structure. No, this was just an abandoned house that a bunch of kids, including myself, had taken over and made into our base. The local authority let us be from the very beginning since they knew us youngsters were most likely to riot if we were to be thrown out and since we did not cause any innocent people harm, they did not see any reason to get us worked up. At least that was what I had overheard some of the older kids in the house talking about.

I was not much into politics and that sort of stuff so I had no idea if we were actually allowed to stay at the house or not. I just came there because I would not be able to do my thing at the orphanage without getting caught and punished. So in a way, the youth center was my home during that period of my life. I only went back to the orphanage to sleep and eat. Nothing less, nothing more.

"We can do it your way, I promise, Iruka-kun." How she had obtained my name was a question I could not answer, but she was starting to get on my nerves. She constantly bumped into me, making my hands unsteady. It was just her luck that I had not gotten very far in the process, but once the powder turned into liquid, it would be very unfortunate if she kept jerking me around like that. At the very least, it would end up costing me a lot of money that I would not get anything out of.

"Stop it," I commanded, but she kept on going.

"Please, I need this more than you."

That was the last straw. I grabbed her by the shoulders and pinned her to the floor, glaring at her so even someone like her could not help but stare wide eyed in astonishment.

She took a moment to comprehend the situation and slowly guided her hands to my upper body, unbuttoning my shirt with those delicate yet dirty fingers of hers. "I thought you would change your mind," she whispered and craned her neck so her lips were able to reach mine.

If it had not been for her wrecked out appearance and shaggy hair, I would have admitted that she was indeed an attractive girl. She let my hand rest on her breast, only grunting a bit when I squeezed to find out if she was wearing a bra. Nothing.

"What are you waiting for?" she panted and looked at me impatiently. I was still in two minds about whether or not to do it, though at the time, I could not come up with any logical arguments to which choice was the better. Her or that?

She took matters into her own hands and changed our position so she was the one on top. I stared at her for some time, not wanting to be the one to make the final decision. I was fully aware that she would not back down then, but I could not get myself to take her when the thing at stake was something I desired just a tiny bit more than her pitiful excuse for a body.

The taste of her was repelling and she reeked badly, but that was only what you could expect. I probably was not any better myself. Still, I could not help but wonder if it was her or just the alcohol I had drunken that made me want to puke.

"Ngh... Ahh... Ahh," I moaned, grabbing onto her moving hips.

I had never thought I was going to be one of those who did it with someone like her in a place like that. It was degrading. When had I stooped so low? Well, that probably would not be as hard to answer as you might have thought. It all pointed back to just about two years ago. Back to elementary school. Back to a certain janitor.

_Mizuki had been bragging to everyone all day about this new gift his dad had bought for him from America. He was getting on my last nerves, but there was nothing I could do to shut him up. Minato always told me to try and avoid getting into a fight. Especially if no one was provoking me directly in the first place. But Kami, how I wanted to knock that smirk of Mizuki's face. I just hoped the teachers would notice exactly what it was he had taken with him to school so they could kick him out for possessing such an object. _

_There was only one good thing about that "toy" of Mizuki's. Because it was so special, everyone was focusing on that for a change and I could keep to myself without someone trying to pick up a fight with me._

_At least I thought I would not run into any trouble that day, but when my last class ended and I was on my way home to the orphanage, I was forced to stop when someone suddenly blocked my way._

"_Hey, Iruka. Why are you in such a hurry? Don't you wanna see this cool thing my dad gave me?" Mizuki waved the shiny, unfolded pocket knife in front of me. I frowned and pushed his hand away._

"_Don't point that at me," I answered sharply and sent him a glare. He only raised an eyebrow and huffed. _

"_I can point this at you all I want. What are you afraid will happen? It's not like I'm gonna cut you or anything. On second thought, I can't promise anything." Mizuki made a lazy attempt to cut me, but I dodged it easily._

"_Hey, stop that!" I knew he was just playing with me, but he was taking the joke too far. That knife seemed really sharp and accidents happened so even if he did not intend to cut me – although you never knew with Mizuki – I still did not feel comfortable with him waving that thing near me._

"_Relax, loser." The platinum blond placed his fists on his hips and put on an amused look. I tried to push past him, but he got in my way again. "Who said you could go? I'm not done with you."_

"_I don't care. Move."_

_Mizuki shook his head with fake relinquishment. "Iruka, Iruka, Iruka. I try to teach you how to behave, but you never listen. You know, it's hard playing your parent when you're not very cooperative."_

"_Shut up, Mizuki!"_

"_It's always the same with you, Iruka. You have no manners and you're tactless, but I guess that's only what you can expect from someone like you. If your parents hadn't abandoned you, then maybe you would actually be able to mix with the rest of us."_

"_My parents didn't abandon me, they died!"_

"_See, I hear what you saying, but I'm not sure if you're just making that up to make us feel sorry for you? That's pretty low, even for you, Iruka."_

_My blood began to boil and I glowered at him without actually being aware of it. My mind was somewhere else. I was choking Mizuki, making him pay for everything he had ever done and said to me._

"_Why don't you just withdraw from school? Nobody likes you so it's not like anyone would miss you. Besides, you already know you don't belong here, so what's the point in staying?"_

"_I told you to shut up!" I burst out, taking a swing at him. Unfortunately, the blond's reflexes were faster at reacting than his common sense and so he gesticulated in order to protect himself from me._

_When hiss eyes fell back on me after realizing that I was not going to try and hit him again, he discovered the consequences of his action._

_I was staring at him blankly. He looked rather frightened, but as me, he had frozen up and we just stood there and did nothing. Said nothing. The line of pain across my nose was scaring me. What exactly had happened? Something was running down my cheeks and nose. Blood. I smelled blood._

"_Iruka!" someone shouted and I heard steps running closer towards us, but I could not force my body to turn around and look at the approaching person._

_A yellow haired man stepped in between Mizuki and me. The stunned look on his face only added fuel to my fear. _

"_Iruka, are you alright?" My widened eyes were in a desperate need of moist, but they would not close. I just stared at him, nodding one time without actually knowing what I was answering._

_Minato turned around to look at Mizuki who still stood as if petrified. We were equally overwhelmed. Flabbergasted._

_To both our surprises, Minato raised his hand and struck Mizuki hard before taking away his knife. The janitor started yelling something, but I could not follow. I was not aware of very much at the time. _

_When he turned back around to face me, he squatted and cupped my face. "Iruka, I'm taking you to the hospital. Are you sure you're gonna be okay?" I did not answer him, only stared._

_That day, Minato took me to hospital. There was not much they could do about it and they told us face cuts always seemed more serious than they actually were because of all the blood. They treated my wound, but I had no idea of how they closed it because frankly, I was only physically present the rest of that day and the next two days forward. That was why I did not show up at school, but when I came back an even worse surprise lay in wait for me._

"_Where's Minato?" I asked one of the cleaning ladies who was in the middle of scrubbing floors. _

"_Who's that?" She did not even look up when talking to me._

"_The janitor."_

"_Oh, he was fired." At that very moment, my world collapsed._

"_Fired?" I repeated accidentally in doubt._

"_Yeah. He hit some kid and confiscated his knife without permission. I think that kid's father even managed to charge him for neglecting his work as well. People should know better than to mess with anyone from the Touji family." She kept on talking, but I was not listening anymore. In fact, I was already on my way out of the front gate._

_She was not telling the truth. Minato had not been fired, I thought to myself, mentally rejecting the possibility of him being gone._

_I ran as fast as my legs could carry me, stumbling over various objects, even my own feet. No. Minato was not gone. He was just sick or something. He was at home, nursing himself. There was no doubt that I was going to see him again next Monday. Maybe Tuesday, but that was it. He had always been speedy at recovering._

_A drop of rain fell onto the tip of my nose. Rain. It was not a sign. Or was it perhaps a good sign? Rain did mean a new beginning after all. But wait, a new beginning was not what I wanted. Then was it a bad sign? No, Minato was okay. He would return to work soon, there was no doubt about it. Still, I did not turn around and go back to school. I could not block out what she had told me. I had to check on him._

_But why would they fire him? Did Mizuki's father really have that much power over everyone? Minato was only protecting me. It was not him who had brought a knife to school and cut one of his classmates. Why. Why had they fired Minato?! Stop, I should not think like that, he was not fired!_

_By the time I reached his house, I was gasping for air and literally struggling to stand. I was not used to run for that long. But I was finally there and that was all that mattered. In a few seconds, Minato would be standing in the doorway, telling me that he was okay and that he would return on Monday. He was not fired._

_I knocked on the door, but no one answered. After knocking two times more without getting a respond, I pressed down the door handle and entered the unlocked house myself._

_Something was different. I had been to his house before and something was most definitely different._

_I walked into the living room, finally pin pointing what was wrong. "It's all gone," I whispered, turning around on my heels when someone entered the room from behind me._

"_Iruka-kun?" The yellow haired man seemed surprised to see me there, but his lips did not curl upward like they usually did when he greeted me. Everything was so different._

_We stood in silence and looked at each other. Probably both trying to figure out what to say next._

_Minato was the first one to make a move. He went over to the wall opposite me to take down a small painting. His back was turned towards me when he spoke, "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in school now?"_

_I could not hold back any longer. I needed to know. I needed to hear the words coming from him; the only man I could trust._

"_Did they fire you?" His entire body paused for a second before he went over by a cardboard box and packed the painting away._

"_They didn't have a choice," he answered almost coldly. What was going on? Why was he pushing me away?_

_My eyes dropped to the floor and I scratched the scar across my nose._

"_Don't do that," he said suddenly and our eyes finally locked. I knew I was not supposed to scratch it so what would happen if he was no longer around to remind me of those kinds of things?_

_My hand withdraw to the sleeve of my shirt and grabbed a good handful of it. If I did not hold onto something, I was afraid I would faint. My heart pumped hard against the arm that was pressed against my chest and I suspected that my breathing would not go steady not even once the exhaustion from running would wear off._

_Minato closed the lonely box and picked it up, heading for the front door._

"_Where are you going?" I asked frantically and followed him._

"_Iruka-kun, you already know that there's no jobs left for me in this village. I have to leave." So he was leaving. He really was leaving._

_I held my breath and looked at him when he started packing his car. He ignored my gaze. "No, you can't go. You can start working at the orphanage, don't you think that's a good idea?"_

"_I'm not qualified for that sort of job," he replied flatly and without feeling. His behavior only made me start to panic. Why was not he doing anything? Why was not he trying to find a way to stay?!_

_I tried again. "I'm sure you could learn. Come, we can go ask them right now." I took his wrist and tried to drag him with me, but he only wrenched out of my grip._

"_Stop it, Iruka-kun." A lump formed in my throat as I grabbed onto his arm like my life depended on it._

"_Sensei, don't go, I want you to stay here with me. Please, I beg you, don't go!"_

"_I told you to stop!" He shouted, ripping his arm away from me and put on the most furious look I had ever seen him wear. I barely noticed the curious bystanders. _

"_Sensei?" I whispered surprisedly and took a step away from him. Why was he mad? I had not done anything, had I? No, I did not want him to be mad at me - that would only make him want to leave even more._

"_I'm done. You should go home." I was not sure what he meant when using that tone. And why was his voice so shaky? Was he not angry with me anymore?_

_I would not give up. "No, I'm staying with you!" I stated stubbornly and tried to grab his arm again, but he raised it out of my range. _

"_Iruka-" I unintentionally gave him a thump in the stomach when I forcefully threw myself at him._

_I could not restrain my tears any longer. "Don't leave me, sensei. Please, take me with you! Adopt me and take me with you. I don't want you to go without me. I don't care if we have to live in another village and I have to go to another school, just don't leave me here!" I cried loudly and clung to his wrenching body._

"_I could never provide you with the things the orphanage can, you know that. Now let go, I'm running late."_

"_No!" My nails bore into his back through his clothes and I shook my head frenziedly against his stomach. "Don't leave me behind! I don't belong here, I belong with you! You're my home, sensei!"_

_Minato grabbed my arms so firmly that it hurt and forced me to let go of him. He tried to shove me away, but he never had time enough to get inside the car before I clung to him again like a koala cub cleaving to its mother's back._

"_Don't go!" I screamed, but this time he shoved me so hard that I fell to the ground on my bum. _

_He got inside the car, but I could not admit defeat. I could not go to school everyday without knowing he would be there to comfort me if something happened. Could I even live when knowing I would never see him again?_

_I got up as fast as possible and tried to open the door, but it was locked._

"_No, stay! Stay!" I pleaded and tried to make eye contact. He was avoiding me again, only looking straight forward. He looked so angry so I did not understand why his eyes were glossy._

_The engine was turned on and the car began moving. _

"_No, no, no, no!" I begged him in every possible way I could think of, but the car only moved faster. I ran next to it, but my legs could not keep up with it for long."Sensei, stay!" I cried out as he drove around the corner and I fell to my hands and knees. _

_There was no air left in my lungs. No strength left in my body. _

_He was gone and I was alone. Again._

_The tears streamed down my face, dripping down onto the asphalt. Occasionally one landed on my hand, only making me clench my fist even harder._

_The supervisors from the orphanage did not find me until late that night. They had been looking for me all over the village and found me the last place they would have expected me to be. The old janitor's house._

_I was in bed with a fever for a week after that._

_At my first day back at school, I broke Kotetsu's nose._

I lay on the floor with my head resting in one hand as I watched her fiddle with the syringe. My shirt still hang loosely down my sides, exposing a chest that was paler than usual.

She sat in front of me without moving for quite a while before she finally rose to her unstable feet. For a split second, she looked at me over her shoulder. I could not remember ever seeing anyone with pupils as tiny as hers. With a snort, she turned back around and walked out of the room, the back of her repulsive dress still being tugged inside her panties.

I sighed and rolled to my back, staring up at the ceiling. She had used up the last of my supplies. It would require at least a few stolen items and maybe playing errand boy for one of those low lives again in order for me to acquire enough to make another fix. Man... I truly regretted my choice.

But even if she was not worth it, she was still my first.

Though I could easily have been without the gonorrhea.

**oOoOoOoOoOo**

A ticking clock awoke me. I did not know where I was, what time of the day it was and even what day. My eyes fluttered insanely as I tried to open them. The light in there was so bright, it would take some time getting used to.

"Ah, you're awake." I carefully turned my head to the side, seeing a woman in a white coat.

"Where am I?" I asked and flinched when she unexpectedly started flashing me in the eyes with her medical penlight.

"You're at the hospital. We were called out to get you after you had taken an overdose of cocaine. Try to lie still." I blinked a couple of times before straining myself enough not to move so she could do her job.

I breathed out heavily and looked the other way when she was done.

An overdose? The last thing I remembered was fighting with someone and then taking a celebration line afterward. Had that been enough to nearly kill me? After all this time, had not I become more tolerant? Well, I knew you could not always count on how diluted it was so maybe I should have been more careful after buying my last bag from a new dealer. It was too late to start worrying then, obviously.

"The doctor will be here in a minute." We got eye contact and she smiled at me. "You were lucky. Not everyone is able to survive something like that." She went out of the room and I started staring up at the ceiling. I did that a lot.

"Lucky, huh?" I snorted as I studied the pattern above me. Lucky was not exactly what I considered myself.I never considered taking my own life, but maybe I really was better off dead. Nevertheless, I was too scared to do so. Instead I tortured myself. Not only physically with all the drugs I had been taking lately, but mentally as well. I felt like I had to be punished. I was not sure for what reason and since I had stopped wondering about it a long time ago, it was probably a mystery that was to be left unsolved.

I rolled onto my side and slid one hand underneath my head, staring out into space.

I was alive. Should not I be happy? Maybe it depended on how you looked at it or rather who looked at it. All I could think of was that I probably had to get myself a job to be able to pay off the medical bill I had burdened myself with. The orphanage would surely take care of it in the beginning, but there was no doubt that I had to make up for my bad doings.

A sigh escaped my lips. The doctor had just entered. Was I going to listen once he began his speech? Probably not. It was not like he actually cared for someone like me anyway.

And I was right to assume that the people working at the orphanage was tired of me. They practically forced me to get a real job when I could not explain where all the money I collected came from. They could never really get me out of the shit I had surrounded myself with, they could only push me in the right direction.

That was when I met Tenzou. A strict, though caring, shop owner. He took me under his wing and swore that he would help me get better. I did not realize that I actually wanted any help until I saw how most people lived. For my entire life, I had not seen much else than the inside of the orphanage, my school and places like the park where Minato had brought me from time to time. But I had never noticed anyone but myself. I was so enshrouded by self pity that eternal sadness and loneliness was all I thought life had to offer me. Tenzou showed me otherwise and I began to feel ashamed of myself. He was right when saying,"Once you're old enough to leave the orphanage, it's up to you alone to decide what you want to do with your life. No one ever has to know what you came from. You can form your own future."

Tenzou gave me a dream. A dream of moving to Tokyo and becoming a wealthy and acknowledged accountant. In Tokyo, there would be so many different people, maybe even someone who had had a life similar to mine. I could create a new life in a place where no one knew me. I could start from scratch. That was what I wanted.

I started getting professional help after Tenzou had recommended it to me. It did not turn out so well and I figured if you needed something done properly, you had to do it yourself.

And so I began taking some responsibility and went cold turkey. It was a drastic and very sudden decision, but once it was made, there was no turning back. The time it took me to rehabilitate was longer and more painful than I had expected, though it was all worth it. Just seeing the proud look on Tenzou's face when I returned clean and healthy was enough to satisfy me for a long time. He did not even scold me for not showing up at work for over two weeks. I guess I should have called him.

My success was due to my own determination. I learned only to trust myself.

But eventually, it was also I who shot myself in the foot and began coming up with excuses to why I should not leave the village. I had lived there my whole life so there was a certain security in it. I knew what to expect of it. I could see myself grow old there. I could not see myself do that in a city like Tokyo. It was just so distant and things could go even worse there.

I was evidently the biggest obstacle in my path to happiness and in the end, a stable, known future won over the insecure and unpredictable one that waited for me in Tokyo. I stayed and chose to forget about my dream. Instead, I began living inside my own head. I created the perfect world where those pricks from the outside could not disturb me. I hated everyone. Everything was their fault. They were the reason why I was not happy. The only problem was I did not want to face the awful truth. The hate I felt towards them was only self-hatred directed outward. And with the hateful signals I sent everyone, I, of course, only received such signals back, causing me to think that it was in fact the world and not me that needed an attitude adjustment.

What happened next? Then came a man I had never seen before, which was strange because I knew about everyone in the village or at the very least, I knew their faces. But his I did not know.

He was so different. So kind. So polite. So unprejudiced. Who was it he reminded me of?

For a long time I was not sure. Not until that fateful day where he sat me down and asked about my past. A past I had not been confronted with in a long time.

All the anger I had earlier turned into fist fights had been contained for a long time, but after I met him, they surfaced again. The cocky noesis, the self-criticism, the identity crises. Everything. I was turning into a monster again and it was all because of him.

**oOo**

Kakashi looked at me with slightly widened eyes. When he asked for the reason why I was so angry, he probably had not expected to get an answer like that. It was so complex, I was not even sure if I understood it myself.

But there was one thing I had finally agnized. The last puzzle piece had fallen into place.

"You remind me of Minato," I said quietly with a voice that had gone hoarse from all the talking.

He stared at me without saying anything while a smile tugged at the side of my lip.

Yes, he reminded me of Minato. My first and only friend had finally returned to me.

**oOoOoOoOoOo**

***Victory dance*  
>The 27th chapter is up!<strong>

**Man, almost 30 chapters long. I've out done myself :O!**

**By the way, some say Mizuki's last name is Touji, some say he doesn't have one. Well, I named him Touji since he needed a last name xD Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.**

**And hopefully we will soon have another one shot winner :D The 150th review is not far away so keep it going - I could really use a one shot challenge ^^!**

**I don't know when the next chapter will be published, but I'm gonna work on it today so if you cross your fingers, it might not take so long :)**

**Until next time. See ya'!**


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

Kakashi was struck dumb. He stared into space like he was trying to comprehend my speech. I could never blame him for keeping quiet even though the silence was making me uncomfortable. After all, I would probably have reacted the same way as he did if I had been in his shoes.

"There's just one thing I don't understand," he said suddenly and looked at me. "Why didn't you just tell Zabuza this? I'm sure he would have understood."

My eyes glided away from his shaken figure. "You're the only one I've ever told this. Not even Tenzou knows all the details." I did not doubt that he could then figure out himself why I had not told Zabuza and instead acted violently.

"Re-really? So... Why did you tell _me_?" I glanced at him for a short moment before biting my lip in frustration. Was it not obvious by now why I had told him and no one else? Had not he listened to any of the things I had told him?

"Because I trust you and you're-" I paused, giving my response another thought. "You're my best friend." Kakashi should be well aware that I had not had any real friends and comparing Minato and him was my way of declaring that he was indeed my best friend. But since nothing seemed to come through to him – which was probably just due to shock – I tried to be as plain as possible.

"I-I am?" Kakashi stuttering was something you did not hear very often and so I treasured the memory of being able to make him talk so insecurely.

"Yeah."

"Well, that's nice to know. Especially since I consider you my best friend too."

I snorted in amusement. "You know, you're not obligated to say that back."

"I know," he answered simply and smiled. I, of course, could not help but smile back at him. Somehow, the situation just felt very nice. That was my first time telling that story. My story. And never in my entire life had I imagined to get such a calm conversation after blabbering on about how my life had been before I met Kakashi. But that man could ease my mind even when I thought it was not possible. He was something - that was for sure.

I looked straight ahead with a quiet chuckle, the smile still playing on my lips "I always thought Asuma and you were the closest."

"Nah, he might be my oldest friend, but we're not that close. He's a cool guy, but like the others, he doesn't always get me."

"What do you mean?" I put on a puzzled look when eyeing him. His smile grew wider.

"I just think you and I are more alike so we get each other better. Maybe that's why I've always found you easy to talk to and be around in general."

My jaw nearly dropped when he claimed that the two of us were "alike." We were nowhere near alike. Kakashi was this awesome person who was considerate, unprejudiced, kind, funny and an overall easy going guy. I, on the other hand, I was not easy to talk to, I always had my defenses up, I was a narrow-minded, half-wit, stubborn donkey that cared about no one but myself. How could he ever compare us? In which way could he possibly think that we were alike?

I chortled and shook my head lightly, "I don't think we are very similar."

For some reason, he grinned back at me. "More than you think," he said in that overly happy tone only he could use without sounding sarcastic.

He only confounded my confusion. What did he mean by that?

It seemed like Kakashi picked up on my bewilderment and I figured he was about to expound just what he meant. But the next statement did not clear out anything.

"Why do you think I wear this mask?" he asked and pointed an ultramarine blue fabric. That stunned me a bit. He had never brought up his mask himself.

"I don't know. Never given it much thought," I lied, shrugging. He raised a suspicious eyebrow at me. He probably had not forgotten that night where I had persistently asked him about his mask. Besides, anyone would at least give it some thought once in a while since it was not a very common sight. I exhaled heavily and smiled restfully. "Fine, of course I wondered. But I've no idea what it is you're hiding."

"It's funny how you assume I'm hiding something."

"Then am I wrong to assume that?"

"Do you wanna see for yourself?" I stared at him rollickingly, not having expected him to say something like that. Could he really mean it?

I nodded slowly, trying not to look as giddy as I felt.

He carefully hooked one finger under his mask. Hesitatingly, he glanced away from me and a loud sigh escaped him. It was probably not meant for me to hear so I did not react on it, even though his dubiety made me want to tell him to stop.

And suddenly, the mask did no longer cover his face, finally revealing to me what he actually looked like. It all happened so fast. How did I go from flipping out to calmly telling Kakashi my life story and then him taking off his mask? It was unreal. Why was he even showing me?

When my mind stopped wandering, I focused on studying his face. He was nothing like I had imagined. I had tried not to set my hopes up too high and just imagined him as an ordinarily looking guy. Well, it was not like there was anything unusual about him either, but somehow he managed to look... almost perfect. No, he was perfect.

My eyes took a walking tour down his clean-shaven face. His face was shaped almost as an inverted triangle. The jawline and chin were narrow and the forehead was slightly wider with a low hairline, though that was hard to see when the fringe was styled the way it was. The thick spikes kind of hid away his forehead.

I looked closer, wanting to take in every single feature he possessed. The only thing I had ever been allowed to see was his eyes and thank Kami he did not cover them with eye patches or something. His always half-closed, slightly slanted eyes were my favorite part. One glance of his enchanting gray irises and those small black dots that passed for pupils were enough to stop any man or woman in their tracks. At least if he wanted to do it, he could.

The new attributes were his small, pointy nose and thin lips that were twisted into an insecure smile. It surprised me a little to realize this because all I had ever seen was the confidence that had always radiated from his eyes. But without his mask, all there was left was an uncomfortable expression. In a way, he looked rather shy. Or maybe that was just the not-so-noticeable dimples that made him look like that. They were small and not very deep, but they were there, giving him a cute, sort of young appearance.

I think my staring made him even more pale and careworn. The discontent face did not make him less beautiful. It just made him look like more of a living art piece.

"My childhood can't be compared to yours, but for me, being the only kid with acne wasn't easy."

Acne? I took another intense look at his face and was surprised to discover that I had not even noticed the quite rough skin texture. The pimple scars were evident, I just had not given them much thought since they had not bothered me. You could call it a flaw, but it did not make him less perfect. Not to me.

"_No one is flawless. It's up to the individual to judge whether or not something is perfect. When you find someone perfect, it's only because you're able to look past their flaws. So stop running yourself down. I think you're perfect just the way you are."_

I smiled inwardly. Sensei always knew all the right things to say. Some problems might seem shallow to some while the same problems might be life defining for others. I should not think badly about Kakashi for hiding his face even if I found his reason fatuous. It was obviously a huge problem for him. At least it had to be for him to constantly hide behind a mask because of it.

"It's water next to what you've been through, but I've never been as mentally strong as you. That's why I look up to you so much," he continued, stunning me in the process.

"You... Wha-What?"

He... looked up to me?

"I don't know, it might be a weird thing to say, but I'm not afraid to admit it. You're a very admirable person."

An admirable person. Me? I could not agree. Had he not listened to a single thing of what I had just told him? I was the kind of person parents would not let their children near by because I was the ultimate bad influence. There was not one admirable thing about me.

"I wish I was," I replied flatly and looked away from him.

Kakashi laughed, "Self-critical as always. Oh well, I guess it's better than being a coward." He made as if to put on the mask again and at that moment, I did not think. Suddenly, I was holding onto his wrist, preventing him from covering his face. He looked baffled.

"Leave it," I said quietly, my tongue moving on its own. It was as if I had no control of my own body anymore.

I stared at him. It was strange how much he reminded me of Minato. The way he spoke, the words he chose, his pearls of wisdom, his laid back attitude, everything. I missed him so much, but whenever Kakashi was with me, the nostalgia was not as intolerable.

My eyes could not be torn away from his slightly opened mouth. He had a fine set of teeth. A bit discolored, but not more than you could expect from someone who drank as much tea as him.

"Iruka, what are you doing?" He sounded confused, maybe even scared, but his voice was still gentle.

A hand ran over his cheek, a breath hit his face.

Kakashi looked up to me.

"I-Iruka, wha..." he paused when the hand on his chest forced him to lie down on the bed he already sat on.

I felt drunk, but I had not had nearly enough alcohol for that to be the sinner. Regardless of how sickeningly sentimental it might sound, I was drunk on him. His presence alone was enough to get me tipsy.

He looked at me with widened eyes. I was not about to do something to him that we had not done before, but I suppose it was different when we were not actually drunk. I just could not wait anymore. For once I was following my instincts.

I lowered my head, his fast breathing becoming louder the closer I got.

The feeling of victory slowly spread throughout my body. My eyes were already closed.

I opened them again when my lips connected with his skin. If only it had been the thin, fragile skin on his lips that had met with mine. All hope vanished when I sat up straight, looking at Kakashi who had turned his head and placed the back of his hand on his cheek to prevent me from kissing him.

He had a mixed look on his face and I could not figure out how to interpret it. Was he disgusted, sorry or perhaps just overwhelmed?

I turned my head away from him and brought my hand up to my face to cover my embarrassment. It seemed he was just as confused as me.

The mattress was relieved from some pressure when Kakashi got up on his feet.

"I-Iruka, I'm... I'm sorry. I-I didn't kno-know you-" I held a hand up to stop him from talking. I did not want to hear it when I already knew what he was going to say. There was no need to apologize - it was me who had been the misjudging idiot.

He did not move around for a moment, but at last the door closed and I was left alone.

A tear let go of my chin and dropped down onto my pants. I could not remember crying since that day... That day Minato abandoned me.

**oOo**

I found myself walking down the street, hands in my pockets and the cool evening breeze blowing through my loose hair. The last thing I remembered was leaving the house after walking in on Hidan and Kakuzu while they were in the middle of another quarrel. It had happened a lot lately and it was always about the same thing. Zabuza. If Kakuzu was to give up soon, it probably would not come as a surprise to anyone. Hidan needed to seriously pull himself together if he wanted that relationship to work.

How pathetic. Was I earnestly wondering about their relationship? Maybe I did so just to get my mind off my own problems. It was never easy to get rejected, especially not in my case. If Kakashi really was not gay in any way - which I doubted because who the hell would do the things he did to me if he was not the slightest bit gay? - then was that the end of our relationship? Obviously, it was going to be awkward between us after my straightforward confession, but was that enough to make him never want to see me again?

The thought of it made me feel a pang in my heart. We could not end it like that. I needed him.

I started rubbing my temples. Why did I do it? Why could not I just keep my disgusting lusts locked away. If I had not done that, Kakashi would still be by my side on the bed.

Twice had I ruined the bond between me and the person that meant the most to me. What was wrong with me? Was I purposely destroying and chasing away everything that meant anything to me?

All the questions accumulated, which resulted in a strong headache.

"I'm such an idiot. Sadomasochist. A fucking retard," I mumbled under my breath and was thankful that no one was around once I realized I was actually speaking out loud. I must have looked like a real freak. Well, it was not like it would make much of a difference to the villagers. They probably did not expect less of someone like me. And they were right. The moment I tried to kiss Kakashi, I only confirmed their suspicions. I was a loathsome fag.

My head bounced up from its position on my chest when suddenly I heard someone cry out. What the hell? I thought I was alone.

I followed the screams that took me to an alley nearby. It was dark and the street lights did not reach all the way inside the alley.

"Hello?" I asked carefully as I took a few steps forward. "Is anyone here?"

No one answered, but I could still detect some muffled sounds of resistance. I could not be sure what awaited me inside that alley so I took my cellphone and turned on the flashlight to try and cast some light over the situation. That was when the cone of light fell on two people. A frightened woman whose mouth was covered by a hand belonging to cloaked man who was looking right at me. I registered the red clouds immediately.

The man got up and walked towards me with rapid steps.

"Piss off," he snarled with his small, intense eyes fixed on me. A pocket knife was raised and it glinted when reflecting the light from my cell.

Why did I always have to get myself into a situation?

He took a swing at me out of nowhere with the hand in which he did not hold the knife and he hit me on the jaw, causing me to take a few wobbling steps backward.

When I looked up at him again, he was standing with his arms akimbo, exposing those sharply pointed teeth in a wide grin like he had already won the battle.

"Better get out of here fast or else I won't be able to assure your safety." I massaged the spot where he had hit me while trying to figure out what to do.

That man was damn scary with that blue Shrovetide make up all over his face. He had even painted three gill like lines underneath both his eyes. Maybe I was not such a freak after all?

"What's wrong? Too scared to move?" he laughed as he got closer to me.

My heart started pounding faster and faster. There was no doubt that he was being serious. I had to do something if I did not want to wind up either completely battered or possibly dead.

"You sure are cocky," I replied and got a proper footing, getting ready to fight.

He started laughing loudly. "Did you hear that, princess? Your knight in shinning armor has come to rescue you. How sweet." While he spoke, I hurried to put away my cellphone. _That's my chance! _I thought when he looked over his shoulder towards the girl behind him.

I leaned forward, just enough for me to properly reach the knife he held at head height, and I hit him with both my hands simultaneously as fast and hard as I could by the wrist and the back of his hand. I had never used that method before in practice, but it was my only shot at disarming him.

The tricky part was to hit him just right and with enough power for him to let go of the knife. When you strike someone on the back of their hand, they may let go of whatever they are holding, but with a big guy like him, I figured there would not be enough force in a slap like that. His arm was most likely just to move to the side and so he could easily cut me once he gained control of his arm again. That was why I hit him on the wrist on the same time. When hitting his wrist, I would prevent his arm from moving so the entire rap would be taken by his hand alone. Also, when hitting him on the wrist, his hand would curl inward, forcing his fingers to loosen their grip around the knife a little.

To my surprise, it actually worked. Never in my wildest dreams had I imagined it to be possible for someone like me to make that trick work, but it did. I thought only people like Chuck Norris, ninja and martial arts performers would be able to pull a stunt like that.

I was stunned for a moment, but luckily, I got back to reality pretty fast again. The astonishment was written all over his face as he looked the way the knife had flown. I could not afford to let him gain his composure so I acted quickly, striking him on the chin from the bottom and up with the lowest part of my palm. He stumbled backwards and I swept closer, kicking the back of his knee so he lost his foothold completely and fell to the ground on his back.

I looked up at the girl quickly to see if she was okay. My eyes had already gotten used to the dark. It appeared that she had not been cut or beaten too badly and she was calm given the situation. I was lucky that she was not the type to get involved and just end up getting in the way.

"Argh," the man exclaimed in pain as he sat up. He was more than amazed to discover that I was already behind him, pressing the blade of the knife against his neck. It was amazing how fast and strong you got when facing a threat. Adrenaline had to be the most dangerous hormone ever.

It was at times like those I was happy that I was not an inexperienced fighter.

"Don't move," I said, making sure he was aware of the knife's whereabouts.

"You're not gonna get away with this. I'm not finished with you yet!" he shouted angrily and tried to get up, but sat back down instantly when feeling the cold metal pressed harder against his skin.

"I told you not to move, didn't I?!" He flinched and cursed. "Hey you," I yelled without letting my eyes off the blue guy. "Get out of here, now!"

The girl began to move around and soon she ran past me.

"So what do you do now, huh, big guy? Are you gonna kill me? Call the cops? Try and see if you can restrain me for that long. I'm getting impatient here." I looked at the knife for a second before replying him.

"I'm doing neither of those things." I raised the knife and used all of my strength to stab him as hard as I could in the leg before taking off in the direction I had seen the girl running off to. The guy I left behind shrieked in pain and shouted death threats, asking me if I had no idea of who he was. I was perfectly aware of it. He was one of the Akatsuki, but in the situation, there no time to think future consequences through. I had no other choice but to do whatever I had to in order to survive.

When I caught up with the girl, she looked at me with fearsome eyes, not slowing down.

"You better run as fast as you can 'cause I can't assure you that he's not gonna come after us." She nodded and I realized how much she was actually panting. She probably would not be able to go on for much longer. Who knew how long she had been struggling against that guy before I came by.

I guided her through the city and did not stop until I found a spot, which I thought looked safe.

She fought for breath as she bent over and placed one hand on the side of her stomach, presumably because she had a stitch in her side.

"Are you okay?" I asked, she not being the only one gasping for breath.

"I... I thi-think so," she stuttered and looked up at me as she stood up straight again. "Tha-thank you for sa-saving me."

She was not a very tall girl and she looked to be around a few years younger than me. Her long black hair had a purple cast when the moon light hit it as it danced along the wind. I sank loudly when she stared at me with those pale blue eyes. How intriguing they were.

"I should walk you home. Where do you live?" I asked and she wiped away some of the mascara that were off track. It seemed like my question frightened her a bit.

"Uhm... I... I live ju-just over there." She pointed straightforward and I nodded. For all she knew, I could be another assailant that were taking it a step further by trying to enter her home. I did not blame her for being scared, but I could not just leave her there and there was no way she was going to believe anything I had to say. Only my actions could speak for me.

"If you're ready, let's go then. I don't think there's any chance of that bastard following us anymore so we can take it easy from now on." She did not protest when I started walking in the direction she had given so I continued. She was right behind me.

It took about ten minutes to reach her apartment. A lot longer than I had expected. Part of me was not even sure if she was just misleading me so I would not know where she actually lived in case I was a freak like that blue guy. But once she found her key and unlocked the door, all of my suspicions disappeared.

We had not talked at all on our short walk to her apartment, but I did not need her to speak to figure out that her trembling body was due to my presence. But once she had one foot inside the apartment and I stood a good few meters away, she finally found the courage to talk.

"Tha-ank you," she stuttered quietly. I sent her a calming smile.

"No need to thank me, but I think you should notify the police about this."

She nodded lightly a few times. "I-I will." She took a hold on the door like she wanted to get inside and close it really badly. Her hint was loud an clear.

"I should head home. Take care and don't walk around alone in the middle of the night again, okay?" I did not wait for her to answer, just turned around to walk home. But she stopped me in my tracks when practically yelling.

"Wa-wait!" I sent her a questioning look from over my shoulder. She was blushing. "I... I was wo-wondering if I could ha-have your name?"

"Sure. Umino Iruka." For the first time, she smiled.

"I'm Hyuuga Hinata. Thanks a-again, Umino-san."

"No problem." I waved at her and she returned it before I resumed my walk home.

What a crazy night it had been, but I was proud of myself. Definitely. Even after getting rejected by Kakashi, I still had some confidence left in me to step up and fight that guy and after leaving that girl's doorstep, I had an amazing feeling inside my body. I suppose I should have been scared after an incident like that, but I just was not. Maybe my encounter with that man and woman had only been good for me. At least my mind had gotten a break from circling around Kakashi. Even if it was only for a short while. Hopefully, that break was enough for me to then look at the situation in a different perspective. Yeah, that was it. I should not just give up on Kakashi after one rejection. I had caught him off guard, of course he did not come out and return my feelings all of a sudden. I would just have to fight harder. There was no way the things we had done together meant nothing to him.

Kakashi would eventually be mine forever.

**oOoOoOoOoOo**

**Maaaaan, I don't think I've ever struggled as much with anything before as I have with this chapter. Once again, I wrote and entire chapter, then read through it with my friend and realized just how much I hated it. Well, in this case I was actually pretty sure that I despised it from the very beginning. And so I had to delete the entire chapter and rewrite it all over again -_-' FML...**

**Sorry for the waiting time. I have a surprise, though, for all the people who would like to know more about Itachi in this story. I've planned out too exclusive one shots that has to do with him. Looking forward to writing them :D!**

**- Hey, and don't forget the Anything Else? poll on my profile page. Still planning to do something with the winning characters.**

**Zanezell155 has again drawn an illustration for Anything Else? This time, it illustrated the last scene in chapter 27. Here's a link (without dashes): h-t-t-p-:-/-/-fav-.-me-/-d5dqu2h**

**thank you, girl, you're amazing and it's always a joy to see what you come up with :D!**

**And remember, the 150th reviewer gets a one shot so hopefully I'll be able to give away the next one shot after this or the upcoming chapter^^!**

**That's all for now. See ya' again soon, hopefully :D (School is really catching up to me so sorry if I can't promise any quick updates. I'll do my best, though^^)**


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

**A/N: Hello everyone. No, I haven't given up on this story and I never will. School is taking up a lot of my time, but Anything Else? will NOT be left unfinished! I will not rest till this story has come to an end. Okay, so we're clear? Good xD. Just wanted to let you know that this isn't one of those stories that will be left "in progress" for all eternity. Hope that makes at least a few people out there happy to know :)  
><strong>

The clock was around 15:00 when I stepped out of the bus and walked down the then very familiar stone path with one bag of groceries in each hand. It was incredibly warm and humid outside, you could easily tell that we had just stepped into the summer season of Japan. Unfortunately, early June also happened to be the rainy season in these parts of the country. A hail was probably hiding inside one of those darker clouds in the horizon, slowly making its force of raindrops greater till it would finally burst and wash away the remains of everything that was not waterproof.

My eyes fell on the two cars standing in front of the house as I walked by them. Kakuzu had bought himself a car just a few days ago. He did not think it was fair to Hidan if he had to keep on being the only one driving between his and Kakuzu's place. With a car, he would also be able to drive to work without having to wake Hidan in the morning – which, apparently, was a huge problem.

His car was not anything fancy, though. The rims were nothing to write home about, the paintwork was irregular so even the blindest man would be able to tell that the flame red car used to be painted a deep blue. And like that was not enough, the hood was bumpy and the inside upholstery fabrics were a terrible vomit green and torn in various places. Those were only a few flaws out of many, to tell the truth.

Imagine how Hidan and I reacted when seeing that wreck. Especially after Kakuzu had proudly showed us his expensive car radio complete with two enormous speakers in the back of the trunk. Yeah, weird combination. Seemingly, Kakuzu wanted to "cruise with style," though I did not know how much style there was about that. He truly was someone who cared about the environment and the quality of the things he bought, but the speakers were about the only thing that lived up to those standards. You could practically see the world dying behind you when driving past in that gas guzzler, which did not exactly make the kangaroo ride more enjoyable to attend since Kakuzu had no idea of how to drive a stick. Well, in some cases he probably did, but not when it came to cars, if you know what I mean. At least the sound level of Hidan moaning at night would not make any sense then.

But lately, they had been strangely quiet after they went to bed and at this point, you should not be surprised to hear that they fought a lot. Much more than they used to, which was sad, but there was nothing I could do no matter how much I wished to help them solve things out.

When I opened the door and walked inside the the house, I was pleased to hear that the spacious rooms were not filled with loud screaming and door slamming. It was quiet and the atmosphere seemed nice and peaceful. I crossed my fingers, hoping it would stay that way at least throughout the day.

I headed towards the kitchen, but a calm conversation between the two lovers made me stop in my tracks, not letting them know of my presence.

"Hey, Kakuzu, can I ask you a private question?"

Once, I always tricked myself into thinking that eavesdropping on private conversations was normal, but with every time I did it, I figured I was just looking for an excuse to eavesdrop some more. No wonder Kami castigated me every now and then.

"Don't think there's any left to answer, but sure, ask anything you want, inquisitive Tom."

"Ha, ha ,ha. Not funny. It's not that kind of private question, I just don't want you to tell anyone about this conversation, okay?"

"Get to the point, Hidan."

They were quiet for a minute.

"I was just wondering about something. You're good at that gay thing, right?"

"What gay thing?"

"You know, that thing you do when you look at people and then determine if they're gay or not."

I was pretty sure I could hear Kakuzu literally face palming himself, and honestly, I was close to doing so myself. Hidan could be a complete idiot sometimes. He was so bad at expressing himself.

"If it was a gay thing, you would have that "power" too and we wouldn't be having this conversation."

"Whatever. Just forget it."

"No, come one, Hidan, now you've made me curious." Kakuzu did not sound very curious, but when Hidan got like that, it was better just to listen or else he would be all pouty for the rest of the day. Maybe even longer. Poor Kakuzu.

"Well... Have you noticed anything about Iruka?"

… Mentioning my name in that kind of context did not exactly thrill me. Had he actually figured it out? Or was it perhaps Kakashi who had said something? My eyes widened at the thought and I immediately felt the nervousness in my stomach. Why did I always have to dig in business that was not mine!

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"Which team do you think he plays for? You've known him for long enough to judge that by now, right?"

"He's straight. Why do you ask?" It was funny how confident Kakuzu sounded when saying that, but at least he did not suspect anything. Maybe he would be able to get Hidan off my back? At least it sounded like the silver haired albino trusted him.

"How can you be so sure?" Hidan asked, not sounding very convinced, unfortunately.

"There's nothing gay about him. He doesn't act gay, he doesn't sound gay, he doesn't look gay. Not to mention the way he always has to adjust his genitals whenever that commercial is on."

What commercial?

"What commercial?"

"You know, the one with the red haired girl and glasses. It's a perfume commercial. I think her name is Karin or something?"

I don't remember such a commercial?

"Haven't seen it." It sometimes scared me how muck alike Hidan and my thinking patterns were. I suppose I should be embarrassed.

"You have. It's on the TV all the time. She's dressed as a mermaid and she pours water all over herself so she won't dry out while being onshore."

Oh, that one. Wait, I do _not_ touch myself! Sometimes I do, obviously. I'm only a guy, but not when I watch that commercial. Do I?

"Oooh! Couldn't you just have said that to begin with? Like I would remember some model's name."

"You were a model yourself. Kinda figured you would know some of your rivals' and colleagues' names."

"No need to. My agent whispered them to me before I had to talk with any of them. It worked out perfectly. Well, most of the time. But that's not what we were talking about. I've never seen Iruka do that when that commercial is on."

"How could you when your eyes are as plastered to the screen as his?"

My cheeks and ears were burning hot. Did I really do that? Why had I never noticed? Could it really be for the same reason as Hidan?

Hidan huffed, "That doesn't make him straight."

"You're saying you can prove me wrong?"

Then came that quietness again. Out of all the times Hidan could choose to keep his mouth shut, why choose then? I wanted to know. But on the other hand, I was not sure if I wanted Kakuzu to know.

"I didn't think so," Kakuzu snorted and the silence continued. I was both thankful and disappointed at the same time when Hidan did not say anything. It was probably for the best.

But just when I was about to walk inside, Hidan confessed. "He asks questions about us two all the time. And I've kinda made out with him before." Something was slammed down on the table just before a chair screeched against the floor. Someone walked further away from the door and soon the faucet started running.

I did not appreciate Hidan telling Kakuzu that at all.

"Hey, calm down, Kakuzu. It was before I met you."

"I'm not mad. And so what, that still doesn't make him gay."

"Come on, don't be like that."

"He could have lots of reasons to ask. He could just be curious. Same goes for the kissing."

"Kakuzu."

"Tell me about the situation. What happened?"

"I know you don't wanna hear it."

"This isn't about me. I'm proving a point!" Ouch. I did not like that tone Kakuzu was using. The fact that he sounded so angry and that they were fighting again almost made me forget what the conversation was actually about.

"Well..." Hidan began carefully. "I had a party and I asked him if he wanted to kiss because he started asking these weird questions. I was just joking, of course. But then later that evening, he took me up on it. I hadn't seen it coming and we were both drunk so I just went along. He bailed out pretty quickly, though."

"That doesn't prove a thing. He was drunk, he's the curious type and it doesn't sound like he has ever really been exposed to this gay 'phenomenon.' It's nothing. Don't put anything into it. He regretted kissing you, right? Shouldn't that be proof enough? Besides, why the hell would you ever ask him if he wanted to make out with you? You know how he is."

Hey, how am I? Please continue that sentence, Kakuzu!

"I didn't know him very well back then, but I guess it was pretty stupid of me. He always over thinks everything and yet he always manages to overlook the consequences his actions will have." They both laughed quietly.

So they are loosening the tension between them on my expense? Happy I could help. Not.

"But seriously. I don't think he's gay. Even if he is trying out things, I bet he's just confused. He's probably in some kind of weird, inverted denial face. I'm sure he doesn't even know what he's doing. Just let it be. He'll figure it out himself eventually. Don't get involved. I bet you'll just end up confusing him even more."

What the hell were they talking about? They spoke of me like I was some child that was incapable of taking care of itself and stupid and... I did not want to hear anymore. What did they know about me anyway? It was not like Hidan was any better himself. He claimed that he only fooled around with men for fun, but all of a sudden he started dating a guy and their relationship might come to an end because he does not dare to tell anyone about it. If anyone is confused and stupid, it's him. Not me.

I walked back to the front door, opened it and then shut it close as loudly as I could before walking inside the kitchen.

Hidan was the first one I saw. He was sitting at the table with a cup of caffeine free coffee in one hand. Kakuzu stood by the sink, his hip leaning against the counter with a wet washing-up brush in his hand. Their attention turned to me.

"Hey, Iruka. We were just talking about you." Kakuzu caught me off guard when saying that and I was afraid the surprised look on my face would give me away. There was no way I could have expected such honesty.

"Is that so?" I tried my best to play it cool even though that had never been my strongest card. "You're aware that defaming isn't nice, right?" Hidan did not even twitch one muscle. He was stone cold.

So was Kakuzu. He put on a very convincing smile and tipped his head to the side. "Tell me, Iruka, have you been eavesdropping on us?" It was obvious that he was being sarcastic, but he hit spot on and that frightened me a bit.

"Perhaps," I replied and started unpacking the plastic bags with the help of Kakuzu.

As the tan man walked past me, he let his fingers play with my hair for a split second. "I was just telling Hidan how cute you look with that ponytail. That's all." Someone had to give Kakuzu some credit for his assuring ability. That man was good. If I had not personally listened in on their conversation, I would never have guessed. And that was in spite of his rather lame excuse. Like my ponytail would ever randomly come up in people's conversations when I was not even around.

"Thanks, I guess."

Kakuzu was acting so normal, like he had not just insulted me behind my back only a minute earlier. Hidan, on the other hand, he was observing me. My every move. I could not even count the times he gave me the elevator look. It was like he was searching for something. Searching for proof.

"Thank you for going shopping, Iruka. I would've taken you if I'd been home before you left. I'll take the rest." Kakuzu patted my shoulder and smiled. That damn fake smile.

"No problem. It's not like I would wanna ride with you in that piece of garbage anyway." My words were a little harder than I had intended and Kakuzu seemed a little hurt. Not much, but the emotion was there. Whatever, Hidan and I joked about his car all the time. He should be used to it by then. And he should not stand there looking all hurt when he had just said those things about me. Just because he did not know I knew it, he still knew it himself. He should feel at least some shame.

I walked out of the kitchen, not being able to hide the annoyed look on my face anymore. Hidan noticed.

Almost a minute went by after I had left before they spoke again.

"Did I say something?" Kakuzu asked.

"I don't think so."

Silence.

"But you have to admit that ponytail is kinda gay," Hidan said suddenly and I could not help but bring a hand up to my hair.

"Really? No, I think he looks cute with it." Cute? Gay?

In the bathroom, I looked at myself in the mirror. First with the high ponytail. Then with loose hair. Then with a regular ponytail. Then loose again. As I put my hair into a ponytail once again, I wondered why I had never given my hair much thought. Did a ponytail really make me look cute and gay at that? Maybe, I could not really tell. I had always worn my hair that way and there was a time where me being cute or gay just was not something I would ever see myself as.

The high ponytail got messed up and I had to pull out the hair elastic and try again. And again. And again. And again. Then the hair elastic broke.

"Damn it!" I hissed through my teeth, looking down at the snapped fabric covered rubber. I would have to go and buy some more. How troublesome. Almost too troublesome.

**oOo**

I sat in the living room when Hidan went to answer the door. I had not even bothered to be polite and go open the door for him. He could do that himself. It was his house, after all. You could easily hear Hidan's and the other's conversation from where I sat.

"Hey, didn't expect to see you here today. What's up?" Hidan greeted and what a greeting it was. If I had been the visitor, I would not feel very welcome after that.

"I'm here to see Iruka. He isn't picking up his phone. Is something wrong with him?" I jumped up from the chair when recognizing the voice answering Hidan. Why had he come to talk to me? And I had not received any messages or calls.

Quickly, I tapped my pants' pockets. Maybe I had not received any calls nor messages because my cell had been lying in my bed room the entire day. Well done, Iruka, very well done.

"Sure, come in, Kakashi." I was panicking. What should I do? Hidan that idiot had invited him in without asking me first. What if I did not want to talk to him? I guess I did, but I did not know what to say. I had not prepared a speech. I had not thought of anything to say. Should I apologize? Tell him it was a joke? Beg him to give me a chance?

I desperately looked for a place to hide, but there were not any places where they would not spot me right away. And there was no time to run to another room because I would have to go out the same door as Kakashi was just about to enter from. Damn it!

My hand grabbed my face as I tried to calm myself down and get my breathing under control. I wanted Kakashi to like me, but how could I even hope for him to pay me any positive attention when I was acting like a nerve wreck. How did my clothes even look? What about my hair? I was not ready for him at all. Why did he have to come so suddenly without any warning?!

"Iruka?" I removed my palm and looked at Kakashi whose eyes were widened to the point where it had to hurt. He stood looking at me for a moment, but as he slowly gained his composure, he walked over to me. "Are you okay? You look pale."

"I'm fine," I replied flatly and took a small step back. I did not like him being so close to me. Especially not when Hidan was watching us.

"Are you sure?" he asked again.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm okay, it's just a small headache," I lied and scratched the back of my neck uncomfortably. I still felt like flipping out, but I could not show Kakashi how nervous I was. I wanted to appear confident. But there was no doubt that he looked right past my transparent defenses. My efforts were resulted in nothing.

Kakashi looked at Hidan and then back at me. "I want to talk to you, but maybe it's best if we go somewhere more private." Hidan did not get the hint. At least he did not act upon it.

"O-Okay," I stuttered and prayed to Kami that I would be able to hold the stuttering to a minimum. I thought I was over that phase. Apparently, it was not so easy to shake off bad habits. My returning ill-temper should have proved that to me already.

As we walked past Hidan, I felt his eyes grow more and more suspicious with every step we took. He was watching me like a hawk. Had Kakuzu not made him abandon his theory? Did he still believe I was gay? Even worse, had he guessed who it was that fascinated me so much?

I felt like letting out a deep breath when we entered my bedroom, but as Kakashi closed the door, I felt how my heart started pumping faster and faster against my worried chest. What was it he wanted to talk to me about? Had he maybe... changed his mind? No, I should always keep myself from creating false hope. It was the dumbest idea to do something like that and I knew it. But I just could not help myself. Was it really a confession that was awaiting me? _Kami, stop it, Iruka! It might as well be the exact opposite!_

Our eyes locked and I saw a small hint of a smile. But it was very faint.

"Sorry if my surprised look offended you, I just didn't expect you to look like that." I was not sure what he meant, but I supposed it was the hair he was referring to.

I ran my fingers through the short strands, tried my best to smile back and answered him with a quiet chuckle. "Do you like it?"

My trip back to the village had not exactly gone as planned. Let us just say that I took a detour around the hairdresser and afterward, my hair was no longer able to go up in a ponytail. The haircut I had gotten was inspired by the famous actor, Miura Haruma, only I had a side cut and the hair in the back was a little shorter. The hairdresser told me that it was a very popular haircut at the moment and that it would fit me perfectly. I guess it did make me look younger while being less cute and more tough and manly. It was something completely different, that is for sure.

Kakashi took a closer look, which made me a little uncomfortable. "It suits you," he said, taking a step back again.

I did not dare to meet his gaze anymore. The tension between us was worse than ever and that alone sent ice cold shivers down my spine. He was not there to talk about my hair, obviously, so why could not I just shut my mouth and let him reveal his agenda already? Did I really want my trembling fingers to go numb first?

He went over and sat on the bed, clearing his throat in the process. I did not follow, only turned towards him.

"I wanna apologize," he said, clearly feeling as uncomfortable as I.

"I think that's my line." My statement made him chuckle lightly. You rarely got to see Hatake Kakashi that nervous and I did not know if I should take it as a good or bad sign. But despite my fear of a confrontation with him, I think I took it pretty cool. So far, at least.

The soft nest of spikey silvery hair tipped back and two gray eyes looked up at me. He seemed so serious, but not even his mask could hide that troubled smile. "I'm really sorry that I left like that. I was just... well... overwhelmed." It was patent that he did not want to go into details about the previous episode and I was only thankful to that.

"You don't have to apologize. I understand."

"Okay. That's good."

The awkward silence came sooner than expected and it almost seemed to bother Kakashi worse than me. His thumbs were circling around each other so fast that I was afraid he was going to make them galled.

I scratched my arm and looked down at the floor, listening as the rain began hitting against the window. In a way, it was calming. At least something was there to remind me that it was not some bad silent movie I was in the middle of, but that it was actual reality.

My eyes traveled to Kakashi's uneasy form and they rested on him for a while. I wanted to say something, but I could not get any words over my dead lips. Maybe that was because what I really felt like doing was communicating through body language with him so we could keep quiet and avoid any awkward conversations. But Kakashi had no desire to communicate with me that way. That was saved for Anko. If only I could say or do something to change his mind.

"Iruka?" He looked at me and I signaled that he had my attention. "I... I also wanna apologize for something else. I-I'm sorry if I ever sent you any mixed signals. I never meant to mislead you like that."

That was a pretty head on rejection. The message came through loud and clear. But I could not just accept it like that, could I? He had given me mixed signals, indeed. In fact, he was the one who started all of it. If he had just kept his hands to himself that night, I would never have begun to question my own sexuality. Furthermore, not start to question my feelings towards him. Whether if I wanted to accept it or not, I would probably never be able to speak up anyway.

We kept quiet for a minute and Kakashi finally realized that I had nothing to reply. So he continued, "Are you sure this is how you feel?"

"Huh?" That caught my attention. It sounded oddly familiar. "What do you mean?"

"Are you sure this is how you feel? I mean... you know... about me?"

My fist clenched around a handful of my shirt. Not you too, Kakashi.

"Please, don't ask me to answer that," I responded quietly and lowered my head with opprobrium.

"But I need to know, Iruka! I'm not even sure what the hell happened that evening. I wanna know what you're thinking. What exactly is it you're feeling?"

I felt so ashamed. How could he even consider asking me such a thing? I had showed him how I felt, what more could he ask for? Saying it out loud was an entirely different thing.

"Come on, answer me. You know I've nothing against Hidan and Kakuzu so there's nothing to be afraid of," he said and I looked at him in astonishment. "Don't look so surprised. It's obvious that they're more than just friends and I know you know too."

"Their relationship is none of my business." My cheeks were heated in a mix of anger and embarrassment.

"I just wanna know where we stand, Iruka. What is it you want from me?" He was frustrating me just as much as I was frustrating him. "You want me to leave Anko for you?" He was mocking me. It was like he was talking to a child that did not understand that the world just did not work that way.

"Kakashi, stop."

"Say something, damn it. I'm sorry I can't give you what you want, but that's just who I am. I'm not gay."

"Shut up."

"No, I won't! I wanna make sure that you're not making a mistake here. You told me..." he paused and I glanced at him. It looked like he was debating whether or not he should continue the sentence. We got eye contact. "You told me that I reminded you of Minato, right? Perhaps-"

"Get out." He had crossed the line.

"What?"

"I said get out!" I grabbed his arm and jerked him to his feet, pushing him towards the door.

"Iruka, wait, I don't understand? What did I do?"

He was about to say the last thing I ever expected to hear from _him – _and that was besides from being the last thing I ever wanted to hear from exactly him. Why, Kakashi? Why did all of you think of me as some child that could not think for itself? I never acted before thinking. I did not over think things. I was not stupid. I could actually think for myself. I was not a child. And most importantly, I sure as hell was able to interpret my own feelings. Who were they to psychoanalyze me?

"Just get out!" I shouted right in his face. He seemed frightened and it had to be either because of the furious expression I wore or the enraged tone in my voice.

"Iruka?" He was stunned and probably tongue-tied. At least I figured that was the case since he did not say anything afterward even though I gave him the chance.

My chest raised up and down along the deep breaths I took. I tried to look at him calmly, but there was no way I could ever hope to succeed in doing so at the time.

"I wanna be alone," I said without looking at him as I closed the door. I did not move for a minute because I wanted to make sure he was not going to try and reenter. When it did not sound like he was standing on the other side of the door anymore, I sat down on the edge of the bed.

My head was spinning. Why did I have this feeling of something being stuck in my throat?

The rain was heavier than before and sometimes it even sounded like it was going to shatter the pane. It was kind of cold even under my thick bed cover. Probably because I was the only person to heat up my spot on the bed.

I pulled the cover all the way up to my ears and closed my eyes. I needed some time to collect my mind.

**oOo**

The evening came and I did not even notice until the sun had completely hidden itself behind the horizon. I had not gotten much sleep because Hidan constantly came to check up on me.

First, he wanted to know what happened between Kakashi and me while we had been alone in my room. I guess I could only expect him to want to know. After all, I doubt Kakashi had left the house unseen. He probably did not wear a face that satisfied Hidan's curiosity.

The second time, he came to ask if I was hungry. It was the same with the third and forth time he interrupted my sleep.

"_Dinners ready. Sure you don't want some?"_

"_I put the leftovers in the fridge if you get hungry."_

Luckily, there was no a fifth time. I knew he was just worried and well, he could not lie about the fact that he was curious too, but I was not any better than him so I could not really blame him for that. Still, he was getting on my last nerve. No, I did not want any dinner. I did not want to sit with Kakuzu and him while they kept on fighting. I did not want his suspicious eyes on me while I was eating. I did not want them judging me. I did not want them analyzing me. All I wanted to do was sleep.

A lightning struck and I noted that it was still raining. Why did we have to put up with such depressing weather in the summer?

With a sigh, I rose from my bed and went to the bathroom. I was planning on brushing my teeth, take a leak and go back to bed, but then a fight came in the way. The thing was just that it was not my fight – it was Hidan and Kakuzu's.

"I'm sick and tired of this, Hidan. Stop calling our problems trifles and trivialities!"

"You're tired of fighting? Well, I'm not the one always yelling! And don't glare at me like that. I'm very well aware that I'm loud too, but if I wanna be heard, it seems you leave me no choice."

"You think insulting me is helping your case?"

"Maybe? You tell me. Aren't insults the only thing you react on?"

"I'm warning you, Hidan. Keep this up and I'm out."

"What now? I crossed the line?"

"Isn't that obvious?!"

"Then why do you always push me to this limit?!"

"Because you won't listen to what I'm saying!"

"Then say something. What is it you want from me?!"

"See what I'm saying? You never listen. I told you like a million times already!"

"I don't see why that's so important to you?"

"Kami, and you're the one talking about people being confused, you ignoramus. Why are we even together, huh? Do you even know what it is you want? Is there something you need to do or what's the reason why you shoved me back into the closet? If you don't want me, fine, then say so and I'll leave. If you do, then grow a pair and go talk to Zabu-"

There was a loud smack that made me drop my tooth brush. Why did they suddenly become so quiet?

Someone moved around quickly outside the bathroom and soon I heard the front door shut close before an engine, that sounded an awful a lot like Kakuzu's car's, was turned on.

I finished making myself ready for bed and walked out off the bathroom. Hidan stood a couple of meters away from me, his eyes colder than I had ever experienced them before and I figured it was best to just leave him alone.

I went back to my bedroom where I paused for a moment, reflecting over what I had just witnessed. Hidan seemed very upset. In fact, I had never seen him like that. So it was finally over between him and Kakuzu? It surprised me even if I had prepared for their break up for a long time. They just appeared so happy whenever they were together. Dare I say they were sort of perfect for each other? The only thing that ever came between them was Zabuza. That is all. One single man. Was that really enough to destroy their entire relationship?

In a way, I was in the same position. Well, at least it could be that I was in the same position. I was not really sure, to be honest. Kakashi did not want to leave Anko, but what exactly did that mean? Could it simply be that he loved her and was not gay? Or was he, like Hidan, not able to admit to himself that he was gay? I could be putting too much thought into it, but I just could not settle with thinking that it was as simple as he made it sound. We had not had sex, but we had done stuff together. I wanted him to want more. I truly did.

But even if I wished that things had not turned out the way they had, I was still pretty pissed at him. I would need some time to forget what he had said. What he had implied. I guess it is only normal to be angry with the one you love once in a while.

I pulled off my shirt and stood with it in my hand for a second as I considered what I had just admitted.

Did I really love him? I was not sure what love was, but people told me you knew you were in love when you could not stop thinking about the person. When thousands of butterflies fluttered around in your stomach whenever you laid eyes on your chosen one. When your heart throbbed harder than usual and when you could not sleep properly at night. That was when you know that you were in love.

The door opened and I heard footsteps behind me.

A kiss was placed on the side of my neck. I tipped my head to the opposite side, closed my eyes and let it happen.

I saw Kakashi. I heard him. I smelled him. I tasted him. I felt him.

His arms wrapped around me and oh, how I loved his rough embrace.

Our tongues played for dominance as he obviously won when lying me down on the bed and tugging off my pants.

Moaning, I let my hand travel from the back of his neck and down. He was not wearing any pants either.

My tightly closed eyes prepared for what was to come and I took a strong hold around his neck, his forehead meeting with mine. I held my breath and he gasped in my ear.

All alarm bells in my body started ringing on the same time, sending a dangerous amount of adrenaline through my body. It made me strong enough to push him off, but I did not. I let him be. I let him.

His back was sweaty and so was mine. No wonder with the fierce pace he had set. I bit my lip when he sank his teeth into me, but I could not hold back the moan that was waiting to escape in the back of my throat.

"Say his name," he whispered as he spread my legs wider to make better room for himself.

I shook my head without opening my eyes when hearing the wrong voice.

"Say it," he repeated as he did things to me that made the left side of my face twitch in pleasure.

"Ka..."

"Say it."

"Ka-kashi." I was rewarded to a great extent and it made me pant heavily, made me want more. "Kakashi." I would not be able to hide it from him anymore anyway and his touch – as long as my eyes were closed – it made me want to let go and enjoy the moment.

"Thank you," he purred and kissed my ear before finishing.

"Where're you going?" I sat up in my bed, hiding away certain parts of myself with the bedcover. He looked at me over his shoulder while buttoning his pants.

Those reddish eyes, they did not seem as cold anymore. In fact, he was smiling, faintly, though whole-heartedly.

"Don't expect me home tonight. There's something I need to do." He beamed me a smile and I could not help but send him one back. Then he left.

I stood by the window when Hidan got inside his car. Never in my life had I imagine to do something like that with him.

I sat down at my writing desk; elbows on the desk and my head resting on my fist. Being with him was not a particularly good experience, but as long as I imagined Kakashi, I felt it took away some of the pain and awkwardness. If only life was that easy.

**oOo**

The sun had started rising once I awoke. My back hurt and I was not sure if it was Hidan's fault or the fact that I had slept leaned over my desk.

I blinked a couple of times when the rays of lights blinded me and it was not until then that I noticed that my cell vibrated beside me. It was on silent.

A quick yawn passed before I put the cell to my ear.

"Hello?" I asked tiredly, looking out of the window. Hidan's car was still gone. Hopefully, that meant he had made up with Kakuzu.

"Is this Umino Iruka speaking?"

"Uh, yes?" I took a look at the display to check out the caller ID. It was not one I knew.

"This is Orochimaru from Nagoya University Hospital. There's been an accident."

**oOoOoOoOoOo**

**Dum, dum, dum... Okay, not very harrowing xD**

**Look who's back with a brand new chapter! Yay, I did it! I finally did it! After so many tears and blood and sweat... soooo much sweat (referring to a Naruto cosplay act on youtube xD).  
>I'm happy that I'm finally able to post this on FF! Especially because I'm actually quite pleased with this chapter. Oh, and not to sound extremely arrogant, but some of the scenes in this chapter might appear at bit complicated to some. At least I think the last part with Hidan might. But I'm sure you'll understand and if you don't, just ask, and if you have critique, don't hesitate to throw it at me^^<strong>

**Not long ago, I finished a short story called "Nii-chan" that's about Itachi and Sasuke. This story is an exclusive to Anything Else? so if anyone is interested in finding out what Itachi is like when not being around Iruka and co., that's the story for you. Oh, and it's actually my personal favorite – never thought I would be able to say something like that with such certainty, but it really is the best story I've done so far. Anyway, that's pretty irrelevant, I guess xD**

**Also, if anyone is wondering how Iruka looks like now with his short hair, I drew a picture of him and posted it on my dA. Here's a link: h-t-t-p-:-/-/-fav-.-me-/-d5fybok (without the dashes of course^^)**

**otherwise, you can find the link to my dA on my profile and you can also find the direct link to the picture itself.**

**Oh, and Orochimaru is kinda used because my friend requested him xD I just needed a male doctor and when she said Orochimaru, I figured it was not such a bad idea. He could totally pull the doctor image off xD Honestly, I would never have thought of using him myself, lol.**

**Have a great day :D!**


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30**

It was not long until almost everyone had arrived at the hospital. Asuma, Anko, Kakashi and I were in the room where Hidan lay. He appeared to be okay and the doctor told us that his confusion and somewhat lack of memory regarding the accident were completely normal. He only suffered limited damage. A concussion of moderate severity. Nothing too alarming.

I was a bit surprised when the doctor who called me asked if I would be able to call the other possible relatives that would want to know about his hospitalization. The only relatives I knew of were his cousin Shikamaru and his aunt and uncle, Yoshino and Shikaku Nara, but I was not sure of how to get in touch with them. Besides, I was not even sure if Hidan would want me to contact them. He and Shikamaru had not exactly been on good terms after what he did to me.

Eventually, the people called for ended up being the usual bunch. The people I knew he would want to see. Itachi and Zabuza had yet to arrive and it bothered me a little that Zabuza did not come right away. It was his best friend who was in the hospital, after all. But I guessed you could not expect someone like Zabuza to show up unless you were in serious trouble. He probably did not even consider a car accident a serious situation.

There was one more person, though, that I had called, who had not showed up. It was Kakuzu. He did not pick up when I called him so I only left him a message, briefing him about the situation at hand. Like Zabuza, I did not expect him to show up either. It was not like he actually had any obligations as a friend or partner to show up and check if Hidan was alright. At least not after their break up.

After everyone had spoken to Hidan who was in a weird state where he would suddenly lose consciousness for a few seconds and then wake back up all confused, the doctor came and talked to us about his condition. He was still debating on whether or not to keep Hidan at the hospital for observation. Normally, with a concussion as his, they would send the patient home if they were promised that someone would stay and look after him for the next few days. The effect of a concussion sometimes did not show until the 12th to 24th hour. It could even take days.

I told the doctor I would be around and would not mind looking after him, but that Orochimaru guy was not sure if he wanted to leave it all up to me. He kept reminding me that I would have to check him every hour, also during the night, asking him about his name, which date it was and where he was at. I thought it sounded like a simple task, but maybe I seemed irresponsible or something to him. At least he kept saying, "Well, maybe it's safer if we keep him here at the hospital for the night." I thought it was a pretty big insult, but it could just be that he was only looking out for his patient.

At last, the doctor excused himself, reminding us that he had other patients to attend to and he would be back soon with his final answer. I did not mind if they ended up giving me the responsibility for Hidan's well-being, but on the other hand, it would be easier if they just kept him at the hospital. Obviously, I could not say such a cruel thing out loud, but preventing myself from thinking it was an impossible task.

The atmosphere lightened a bit once the doctor was gone. Everyone went back to talking with Hidan because frankly, he was the funniest thing we had experienced in a while. Some of the things he said made absolutely no sense and as long as he could laugh about it himself, we did not think twice about using him as our personal jester.

That was until the door to his room cracked open and a person we did not expect to show up stepped inside.

Hidan immediately put his elbows on the bed so he could sort of get up into a sitting position. He was just as surprised as everyone else.

The tan doctor that entered clearly felt misplaced with all our eyes fixed on him, but when Kakashi suggested that we all went down to the cafeteria to catch some breakfast, Hidan told us not to leave. Which came as an even bigger surprise. It did not thrill Kakuzu either, but I guessed it made him happy in some way, knowing that Hidan did not want to separate him from us. It was a baby step to admitting that they were lovers, but at least he tried.

Kakashi, of course, suggested we left so the two of them could get some privacy, but after a few minutes, I started to suspect that it was also because he knew what kind of awkwardness that would await us if we would have to give them some privacy while still being in the same room as them. It was not a very comfortable position Hidan had put us in. What we would not do for that guy.

The four of us sat down by a table as far away from Hidan's bed as possible and started talking to distract ourselves from Kakuzu and Hidan's conversation. I tried to listen in on it anyway, but I could not and had to settle with glancing at them every now and then. They literally went through the entire chain of emotions. They looked hurt, angry, sad, disappointed, confused, surprised and happy. It really bothered me that I did not know what they were talking about. The conversation Asuma, Anko, Kakashi and I had was not nearly as exciting as Hidan and Kakuzu's appeared to be.

Other than that, I hated having to sit and converse with Anko and Kakashi. I was mad at the silver haired man and by then, you could call Anko my rival. So she was one of the last people I wanted to speak with. But it was not the time for fighting or being stuck up. I just had to get over myself and my problems because at the time, it was about Hidan and his condition.

"How does Hidan that dumb ass always get to be so damn lucky, huh? Finally something happens to him and then he gets out of it with a freaking concussion."

"Don't talk like that, Asuma!" Anko said, and we were all surprised to hear something like that coming from him.

"Come on, I'm only joking. But seriously, isn't it funny how his life can always be so perfect compared to ours?"

Kakashi raised an eyebrow at that. I did not actually know if Kakashi knew the story of Hidan's life, but should not friends know those kinds of things? Either Asuma was the only one who did not know or else he just did not consider losing your parents and getting involved with some fucked up teenagers a big deal like most others did. Or maybe I just did not know Asuma very well. It would not be a huge surprise since he was the one who lived furthest away from all of us and so he did not participate in everything we did together.

To be honest, Asuma was not as interesting as I first thought he was. For starters, he was not anything like Kakashi, which was the first thing I thought when meeting him. He was the most normal and boring guy of all of them. Apparently, everyone needed to be in touch with reality once in a while. That was why they needed a down to earth guy like him. To stay in touch with the real world.

I directed my eyes towards Hidan and Kakuzu once again. They did not seem as tense or angry anymore. To my surprise, though, Hidan gently grabbed the back of Kakuzu's neck and placed a kiss on his lips. Kakuzu's cheeks immediately turned red and he nearly stumbled backward. When he looked over at us, I instantly looked the other way, acting innocent, like I had not seen anything. I probably ended up looking more guilty than anyone else. If I had started whistling that would have been the finishing touch.

I guessed that meant Hidan had officially come out to us. Could it mean that he and Kakuzu would find back together? At least that had been their only problem, right? That Hidan was being immature about them. Well, we were still the easiest ones for him to come out to. Zabuza was the real challenge and he knew nothing yet.

"Did you see that? Aww, that was so cute!" Anko squealed in a low voice.

"That's what we need. Someone like them to stir the fangirl in Anko." Asuma rolled his eyes and sat back in his seat.

"Give them some privacy, okay? It's none of our business," Kakashi stated and smiled at Anko, placing a calming hand on her shoulder.

It was nice to see that everyone was okay about it, even if Anko was the only one who wanted to comment on their relationship. I thought it showed just how good friends they all were. Even if someone changed, they still accepted the person. It was very reassuring to know. Then maybe if Kakashi and I ever... no, it was too soon to say something like that.

Kakuzu sat down on a chair beside Hidan and the albino soon took his tan hand in his own and I got the feeling that everything was going to be alright.

I was not going to hear the story about how Hidan had driven to an old jeweler's house who he had worked with in the past, in the middle of the night to buy something particular. He spent a lot of time talking to the man before he finally drove off again to pay his beloved doctor a visit. That was when the accident happened. Later, I was also to be told how Hidan asked Kakuzu to marry him right in the hospital bed with us next to them and without us even noticing. It was a sweet thought, but Kakuzu did the only right thing anddeclinedthe proposal. Sometimes you could easily tell that Hidan was the youngest person in our group. Who else besides him would think that marriage was the only way to gain back your loved one's trust and respect? Kakuzu obviously thought he was just being silly, but forgave him nonetheless and told Hidan he might be willing to give them another chance if he promised to get serious. Like the softhearted doctor would ever be able to deny his precious Hidan anything when he had just been in an accident. It was about then the kiss happened. That explained the stunned face Kakuzu had made. But finally, Hidan was stepping up his game.

I was happy for them, but a lot happened before I was even told any of that.

The door to the hospital room opened. It was not a doctor, but another visitor. Or should I say a few more visitors?

Itachi stepped inside the room with a child that seemed to be around seven years old in one hand and a very young child in the other. Not exactly your everyday image of that man.

"Hey, sorry I'm late. Mei could not get off work so I had to bring the kids with me." Itachi beamed everyone a smile before looking down at the oldest of his attendants that was tugging his arm.

"Nii-chan, stop calling me a kid!" The black haired boy did not look very pleased and it did not take more than that for me to decide that I already hated that child. He was definitely the annoying type.

Itachi looked at him apologetically. "Sorry, Sasuke."

"Whose kids are those?" I whispered to the busty woman beside me. She leaned closer to my ear.

"The big one is Itachi's younger brother. The little one there's his son."

The look I gave her gave me away.

"Yeah, when Kaka-chan told me Itachi was a father, I nearly choked on air."

"You don't say?" I raised an eyebrow at her before directing my eyes back to Itachi and the pouty boy with the spikey hair. The youngest of the boys did not say much. He only eyed us with a shy smile tugging at the side of his lip.

Itachi went over to talk with Hidan for a while until the annoying younger brother, Sasuke, got too impatient. He wanted to go home, but Itachi told him with the sweetest voice I had ever heard a man use that they had to stay there for a while. Then he suggested that Sasuke should read out loud to Hidan from the book he had in his backpack and then hell broke loose.

Sasuke sighed loudly as he found his book. Just your everyday child that tries to seem like what he is asked to do is going to be a burden while he actually does not mind being the center of attention.

"No, it's okay, Sasuke, you don't have to read if you don't want to!" Hidan said, seeming somewhat upset.

"Come on, let the boy read. It'll be very relaxing," Itachi insisted.

The argument went on, but eventually, Hidan had to lie and listen to a story about four teenage mutant ninja turtles while he was sending death glares to a smirking Itachi.

"Why won't he just listen to the boy? It can't be that bad, can it?" I turned to the group that looked at me like I was some kind of idiot.

"Are you kidding me? That kid is the devil himself, I swear. I've taken care of him enough times to know by now. We have all tried to take care of him at least once whenever Itachi has been too busy with work or the baby." Azuma glared in the direction of the boy.

"Taken care of him?"

"Yeah. We've all helped out with Sasuke once in a while. He's a handful and has practically been sitting on Itachi's lap from the day he was born. Believe me, being Itachi is no bed of roses. His parents were never there to take care of him, and when Sasuke came, they dumped the kid on him. And now he has his own family to worry about," the man with the beard shook his head lightly and sighed, "Taking Sasuke off his hands are the least we can do to help. It might only seem like a small deed, but believe me when I say, it means a hell of a lot to Itachi. I've never seen any siblings as close as the two of them are, but a man can only take so much, you know? Sometimes he just needs to let loose."

The story of Itachi Uchiha came as a pretty big surprise to me. Who would have known that the eternally stoned drug dealer actually had a family that he cared about and that loved him back? All of a sudden, his abuse was not such a huge mystery anymore. It all made sense. And somehow, I did not really blame him for being a bit fucked up. There was no doubt that I had not heard the entire tale, but what I had heard so far was enough for me to feel at least some sympathy. Or was it pity? I was not always able to tell the difference.

"I had no idea," was my curt reply, but even if I had wished to say anything further, an annoying, pity seeking voice would have pierced through my words like a poisoned needle.

"Nii-chan, can't you ask them to be quiet? I can't read when they make so much noise."

Itachi calmly placed his hand on Sasuke's head and nodded affirmatively towards us as if he was certain that we had heard and understood the pale boy's message loud and clear. When we did not say another word, Sasuke continued reading out loud to Hidan who seemed like he really needed us to keep talking so he would not have to listen to anymore of that overconfident boy's endless blabbering. At least he had Kakuzu by his side, but in my opinion, he did not look very pleased about the situation either.

Time went by pretty slowly for a while and I did my best to try and not look at Kakashi. Being called to the hospital and all had made me focus on more important things, but when the adrenalin from the shock was gone and everybody seemed to be as normal as could be considering the circumstances, I became more and more aware of the fact that I was in the same room as Kakashi... And his girlfriend.

I stole glances of him from time to time, but it seemed like he did not even care I was there. He even sat with Anko on his lap at one point. That made me feel kind of hurt and disrespected. How could he do that right in front of me after our most recent encounter? It was embarrassing to be rejected so flat out like that twice. It only got worse whenever I felt like Anko was purposefully waving the fact that he was her's and not mine right in front of my nose. I guess she did not because I figured Kakashi would not have told her about it. But in reality, nothing was actually holding him back from doing so. She could know every single detail about the day I confessed and got rejected for all I knew. My common sense told me not to think like that, but I could not help it. With her being a complete tease like that,how could not things like that cross my mind?

A relieved atmosphere spread through the entire room when Sasuke finally closed the book. If Hidan had been alone, he would probably have cried out of sheer happiness. Unlike him, I was feeling a small lump in my throat growing bigger as the Uchiha family approached our group.

"What's up?" Itachi greeted with a smile.

"Are you joining us?" Kakashi asked cheerfully.

"No, sorry. Gotta drop Sasuke off at school and I have some business to take care of."

We all nodded while our eyes were automatically led to Sasuke when he spoke with his nose all wrinkled up, "Why are Hidan holding hands with him?" It was said in such a way and so loudly that no one could have missed it nor misinterpreted it.

Kakuzu immediately slapped his hand over Hidan's mouth so he would not say something stupid. The albino was red in rage. Apparently, he did not mind getting into a fight no matter how young his challenger was.

"Well," Itachi started. "That's because they like each other. And if you're a good boy and study hard, you can be just like them when you grow up." The tone in Itachi's voice was overwhelmingly joyful and sarcastic at the same time.

"But I don't wanna be like them," the blackhead protested. "And Hidan is not very smart."

I had to bite my lips not to laugh and luckily, I was not the only one having troubles with hiding my amusement. Hidan, on the other hand, was not very pleased.

"Says the kid that still holds his brother's hand!" Hidan snapped, receiving a deadly glare from Sasuke and a furious: "do not!"

Itachi laughed wholeheartedly, "I'm not gonna argue with that, but don't be afraid to hold another man's hand. It's perfectly normal."

"You never hold hands with other boys."

"Oh, I do, Sasuke. Just not when you're looking. Kakashi and I do it all the time. And sometimes Asuma too. He's quite the stallion."

Asuma's face did not look right and the blush he got spread all the way to his ears. Who would have known Itachi was such a jokester? But still, I felt kind of sorry for Asuma. He was such an easy victim and the others always used that against him. Poor guy.

Kakashi was indifferent. He just thought it was funny and winked at Itachi with a sly smile playing on his lips.

Sasuke looked like he did not know what to think. His whole world must have been turned upside down.

The youngest of the black haired family started looking uneasy, shifting from one foot to another. Then he pulled the sleeve of his father's shirt.

"Hmm?" Itachi made eye contact with him.

"Daddy, go potty." The flushed cheeks made the boy seem very ashamed of his statement. He was so innocent, but I knew better than to fall for a cute face like that. Eventually, he was going to turn into a monster like his uncle. There was no exception when it came to those devilish creatures. They were pure evil.

"Sure, honey, we're leaving now. Say goodbye."

The boy smiled insecurely at us and next at Hidan and Kakuzu. He squeezed his father's hand. "G'bye." His small, childish speech was not probably developed yet. But his voice was as sweet as candy.

Itachi looked down at Sasuke. "Are you coming?"

Sasuke eyed the hand, which his brother stretched out to him, with great longing**,** but turned his head and slapped Itachi's hand away. "I can walk by myself."

Hidan grunted self-complacent when Sasuke answered that.

"Sure you can," Itachi answered and smiled. "See you later everybody!" then he waved and walked off with his kid and Sasuke right on his tail. The black haired boy displayed his superiority over Hidan by sticking his tongue out at him just before leaving.Unfortunately, Hidan felt there was nothing wrong with stooping to the boy's level. Kakuzu shook his head with embarrassment.

Just before the door closed, Itachi suddenly exclaimed, "Hey man, what's up?" but then the door shut and none of us could hear the answer.

Everything was cleared up only seconds after when the door went open again and the last person missing in the gathering stepped inside. Then something weird happen. It was probably one of the weirdest things I had witnessed in a long time.

Zabuza was still holding onto the door handle when he laid eyes on Hidan in the hospital bed. Then only a second went by before he turned around on his heels and walked right out of the room again.

Kakuzu sent Hidan an apologetic look, but Hidan's disappointed face could only focus on one thing. Their intertwined fingers.

I walked through something similar to a wood. It was not quite one, but it was a vigorous place filled with all kinds of trees.

The bus drive had been a drag. Actually, my spirits had dropped a good amount after the never ending talk with the bus driver. I was the only one on the bus and so he thought it would be okay to blabber about uninteresting things to me. After only five minutes, I was beating myself down mentally for not placing myself as far away from that annoying, cap wearing man. But he got me to where I felt I needed to be and that was the most important thing - when trying to look at it from the bright side.

And where was it I needed to be? The answer was simple. After everything Hidan had done for me, it was time for me to pay him back. I had to go and talk with Zabuza. It did not thrill me at all and as I approached his house, it became more and more clear to me just how big of a task I had taken upon myself. Zabuza was indirectly the reason why Kakuzu and Hidan had broken up. Unfortunately, it turned out Hidan's suspicion about Zabuza's way of dealing with him and Kakuzu being together was right. He and Zabuza were best friends. If he could not accept Hidan the way he was, then what the hell could I do to convince him otherwise?

But I had to try. I owed it to Hidan.

The usually cheerful geezer had seemed so distant and sad the day after he had come home from the hospital. The doctor decided to keep him over night, but he was discharged early the next morning. Kakuzu stayed longer than any of us, but in the end, he had gone home to his own place. I had actually expected him to go home with Hidan and take care of him so he would not have to stay at the hospital, but some time apart probably would not hurt them. Maybe Kakuzu even thought Hidan deserved it after their last fight. Life is just not a fairytale and problems will not disappear just because something disturbs the picture for a while. Hidan had a lot of things he needed to think through by himself anyway.

The woody path to the close-minded Zabuza's house was longer than expected. Finally, there was a building in sight and since it was a pretty deserted place, I figured that was his house.

There was only one problem and it was that I did not pay attention to anything else besides the ground when walking up to the house and therefore did not notice the other person standing by the front door until it was too late.

"Hey, who're you and what're you doing here?" was the hostile remark I got when I stood only a few meters away from the entrance.

"Uhm, I know the guy who lives here. I'm here to talk to him." I was not going to give some unknown person all the details. Who the hell did that girl think she was anyway when speaking to someone in that tone? How rude.

"Oh." The weary wrinkles on her forehead flattened out and she bowed. "I'm sorry. Zabuza isn't home at the moment, but you can stay here and wait if you please. I have a feeling he'll be home soon."

Her attitude had changed. Well, a little. She still made it sound like she owned the place or that she had the right to pick who could and could not see Zabuza. It was kind of weird given that I had never seen her before. Zabuza had driven his last girlfriend away just before I came into the group and he had not spoken of any new ones so I doubted that was her role. Besides, she was way out of his league anyway. But then who could she be?

"Thanks," I said even though I did not think it was right of her to give me permission to wait for him. If I wanted to wait, I was going to wait regardless of her opinion.

The short girl sat down on the porch and I took a seat a good distance away from her. But not so much that it would seem like I did not want to be close to her. That would just be rude.

Funny how I found manners important whenever someone was rude to me and then I was going to be all high and mighty by setting a good example. I did not think I had much poise unless I was in a situation like that.

After a short while, the girl started humming to herself. She was definitely a lot prettier when smiling.

Actually, I would describe her as nearly perfect. Even though she was short, she had long, shaved legs. Her hair was around waist length and black but with a twist of brown. The skin covering her slim body was pale, reflecting the sun's blinding rays. And it was flawless. Not one freckle or scar, pimple or anything. She was probably the kind of person to look younger than she actually was. Especially because of those long, black eyelashes that made her look so innocent. I guessed her to be a few years younger than me.

The kimono she wore was not as girly as you would expect someone like her to wear, but it served her well. The only thing she lacked were breasts and unfortunately, the kimono only made that more noticeable. She was as flat as a board. A shame, really, but that was not something a quick trip to the doctor's could not change. Otherwise, she was perfect. That heart shaped face with those feminine features were a definite winner. She would be insanely attractive to any man or woman with decent taste.

The girl noticed I was staring at her and it made her cheeks turn slightly pink as she looked away.

Awkward.

"So," I started. "When do you expect Zabuza back?" One of us needed to say something and since she was not going to begin a conversation, I was forced to take the initiative.

"I don't know."

That was not really the answer I was looking for. Was she kidding me? Did she actually mean what she had said earlier word for word? _"I have a feeling he'll be back soon."_ She sure had made it sound like she knew at least something about his return. Apparently not. What a fine situation she had put me in. Then I could wait forever. I sure as hell would have gone home if it had not been for the confident way she had said it.

I sighed and looked down at my lap. It would be pointless to go back home if he was going to return any minute then.

"Excuse me."

I looked at her out of the corner of my eye before giving her an almost invincible nod.

"I was just wondering if maybe you as a friend of Zabuza knew if he's okay?" The hands in her lap became uneasy.

I looked at her doubtingly. "What exactly do you mean?" I did not like the fact that she used the word "friends" about me and Zabuza. I had actually been quite careful when only referring to us as someone who knew each other.

"I wanna know if he's okay. I'm afraid something's troubling him." She turned her attention to her feet that rested on one of the steps.

"Maybe. But I don't know if I should be giving you any details. You haven't even told me who you are yet?" I tried to catch her attention, but she was too far away mentally.

"I'm... just a worried family member."

I had not expected someone like her to be related to someone like Zabuza. They looked nothing like family. But at least that explained why she had acted so protective in the beginning.

"Then why don't you ask him yourself?"

The girl was still wrapped in a cloud of mystery. I was not sure if I could trust her.

Her hands stopped moving**.**

"He doesn't speak to me about his troubles. We... aren't exactly on good terms with each other. Not anymore. But yesterday, he showed up on my workplace late at night for the first time ever. But... he left before I got down from the stage. That's why I came to see him today. I want to make sure he's okay." She was frighteningly honest. I doubted she could have made something like that up. And what would she gain from it anyway? But those things were not for me to tell. Especially not when her character had not been verified on good authority.

All I could say was, "I don't think there's any reason to worry."

She finally looked at me and forced herself to smile. "I'm happy to hear that. But I still wanna talk to him to make sure. Even if I know he's not gonna say much anyway."

"Yeah, that's about the only point where Zabuza isn't much of a talker." That kind of just slipped. I did not even mean to say that out loud.

Unexpectedly, she began to chuckle. "No, he never was one to speak about his feelings or personal problems."

After exchanging a few giggles, the atmosphere suddenly did not seem as tense as before. Then the girl rose and extended me her hand.

"Are you up for a walk? Time passes quicker when you're not waiting for it to do so."

I looked at her in surprise for a second, but took her delicate hand at last.

Walking through the woods with her was cozy. It probably would not have been if I turned back time around half a year. I would not even have gone with her in the first place. In fact, I would probably have left the minute we met on the porch. Spending time with Kakashi and the gang really had helped me in some ways. Either it had provided me with some social skills that I did not possess before meeting them, or else that worried looking girl was just very easy to talk to.

"So, you mentioned something about a stage earlier. What is it you do for a living, if you don't mind me asking?"

She smiled and cocked her head a bit. "Not at all. I'm an entertainer. I sing and dance in a club down town."

I pointed in the direction of the village I lived in, but she shook her head.

"I don't live around here anymore."

So she was the artistic type. I never would have guessed. But a pretty face like her's could probably sell anything.

"What do you do?" she asked cheerfully, seeming genuinely interested.

I scratched the back of my neck and laughed awkwardly, "Well, I was fired from my last job and it kinda gave me a bad rumor in the village so it's hard to find someone who'll hire me. So I'm just running some errands and stuff for a friend of mine. I know it's embarrassing and pitiful, but there's not much else I can do at the moment."

Her smile only grew bigger - to my surprise. "I don't think it's embarrassing or pitiful at all. I know how those small communities can be so they left you with no other option, right? I'm sure your friend is only happy to help and he's probably happy that you can take a thing or two off his hands. Don't you think?"

"I suppose you could be right." I had never really seen my situation from that kind of perspective before. People did not exactly dream of being in the situation I was, but my life was not the worst one out there. I should probably start looking at things in a more positive light.

That girl sure was more than just silky hair and a face most would kill for. She was pretty wise as well.

We must have walked around the woods for at least an hour or two before we walked back to the house. During that period of time, our conversation only went dead twice, but the silence had not been as uncomfortable as you could imagine. It was nice to just walk around, looking at the swaying trees and tweeting birds.

Just as we returned to Zabuza's residence, we discovered that a surprise was waiting for us right there on the porch.

It was Zabuza who was in the middle of unlocking his door. What better timing could you ask for?

But as I could only expect, a cowardly knot in my stomach began to twist as we approached the tall muscleman.

"Hey, Zabuza!" the girl called out, making Zabuza spin around in surprise. When he gained back focus, he frowned.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he asked in that impolite way only he could do.

The smile on the girl's face slowly faded. "I came here to talk to you."

Zabuza scowled at her. "We have nothing to talk about." and with that he went inside. He did not even look back at us once. Actually, he had not even noticed me. At least he did not make as if he had.

I was not sure what to say so I stayed silent. But only until the girl walked determinedly towards the door.

"I'm not sure we should follow him."

She looked at me over her shoulder after opening the door slightly.

"It's okay. He didn't lock the door."

She had a point, but still, I thought he had made it very clear that he was not in the mood for a visit.

I followed her inside, wanting to see what was going to happen. Even though the situation frightened me a bit.

"Zabuza, I just wanna talk," she said carefully when entering the living room where Zabuza stood in the middle of the floor.

"Didn't I tell you to leave?" He did not look at us.

"Are you okay?"

He snorted, "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because I saw you."

Zabuza turned and looked at her with raised brows.

"You were at the club."

Zabuza did not answer her. It looked like he had not expected her to say that.

"I'm worried about you," she said quietly. "I wanna know how you're doing. But... We never speak. I'm not even sure if you've gotten any of my birthday presents."

He stayed silent. It was a very intense and strange situation she had put me in. She looked so sad and serious all at the same time. Why would not he talk to her?She could not have done something. Had he done something? What was wrong with them? I felt they were having this indirect conversation that there was no way I would ever be able to follow.

Suddenly, I was shoved back hard. I looked at Zabuza.

"Stop staring!" he shouted angrily, receiving a weird look from a very confused me.

"What?" I looked questioningly at the girl, hoping she knew what was going on, but she looked just as confused.

"I told you to stop staring!" He took a threatening step towards, making me step back and put my hands in front of myself. This was the first time he really noticed me, but what the hell was he talking about?

"Zabuza, I don't know wha-"

He pushed me again. "Don't give me that, you bastard. I know what they say about you! Why are you even here? Fuck off!"

"Calm down, Zabuza," the girl said and put a hand on the boiling man's arm. He only evaded her touch.

I looked at her again, only for Zabuza to step right into my personal space.

"Quit gawking at my brother, you freak!"

I paused. Seriously, everything stopped moving. For a second, there was not one single thought going through my mind. Words could not find their way over my lips. I could not even make myself look decent by closing my mouth that stood wide open.

I looked at the girl from the corner of my eye. That could not be a guy. It had to be a girl. Zabuza probably just said the wrong thing. But that was pretty much disproved when I saw the face Zabuza was wearing.

The broad shouldered man took a step back, not saying anything, just like the rest of us. The girl... Or guy was blushing, looking away from both of us. The tension had become even worse than before. Everyone was silent. No wonder with the embarrassment that hang over us like a dark cloud.

The youngest one was probably embarrassed to be confused with a girl and my reaction when finding out he was not probably did not make him feel better. Zabuza was also embarrassed because he had tried to pick a fight with me over such an awful misunderstanding while I was obviously embarrassed because I had not noticed. All of sudden, his lack of breasts made great sense.

We stood like that in what felt like an eternity. But eventually, Zabuza threw both of us out without further explanation. I guess I was only thankful for that. Another minute standing in that awkward position would have killed me.

To begin with, the guy and I did not say anything to each other, but when I felt it was okay to talk again, I said, "I'm sorry."

"About what?" he asked with a small smile. How he could find it in himself to smile like that after what had just happened was beyond my comprehension.

"It's my fault you couldn't get to speak with him properly. You gained nothing from this because of me."

"You think?" He tipped his head to the side, his smile growing wider. I still could not believe that face was a boy's face. It was impossible.

"Don't you?"

He shook his head very lightly, closing his eyes for a moment longer than normally. Then he stared into my eyes like there was no tomorrow. The intensity was sickening. But I noticed that something was different. The look in his eyes. They were not as devastating anymore.

"He defended me." The sentence was spoken with such happiness that it kept echoing in my head as I went home.

Later that day, I sat on the couch in the living room, trying to figure out what exactly it was I knew from the information I had gotten at Zabuza's.

He had a brother. A brother. A guy who looked a lot more like a chick than anything else. There was no way they could be siblings. They looked and acted nothing like each other. It was just too hard to believe. That bitter geezer and that young beauty were related? It was simply impossible.

Hidan had finally gotten out of bed and placed himself in front of the TV even though Kakuzu asked him to be careful with over straining himself. His concussion was still far from gone. At least his case was not that bad.

I watched him, wondering how to ask about that guy.

"You and Zabuza went to the same school, did not you?" I asked, trying to sound like I was not digging for something in particular.

He nodded. After the Zabuza incident in the hospital, Hidan had not been very talkative.

"Does he have any siblings?"

He looked at me and nodded again. "Why do you ask?"

Had he smelled the rat? "I've just always been wondering about that guy. He's kind of a mystery to me."

A sad smile tugged at the side of Hidan's lip. "Yeah, he's values privacy." He paused and turned his upper body in my direction. "Haku," he said and I looked at him with confusion. "That's the name of his brother. Well, step sibling. He's a brother from another mother, if you get what I mean."

"Sure." Surprisingly enough, it seemed like Zabuza was the right subject to make him talk. Who would have figured. Maybe he just missed him being around. Or at least the thought of never having him around anymore.

He leaned forward in his seat and placed his arms on his thighs. "Zabuza's parents got divorced when he was still young. His father soon remarried and with that woman, he got Haku. I always thought it funny how they could act just like they were real siblings. That fact never bothered them the slightest. But they aren't talking anymore."

"How come?" I loved how I could always count on Hidan passing any information to me. He was my Wikipedia. Truly poetic, right?

"Haku changed. At least that's what Zabuza claims. They used to be something like best friends. Zabuza enjoyed spending time with his little brother. But after high school, he found Haku had gotten a part time job as an entertainer at a gay club and it freaked him out. He cut all contact with him the moment he found out Haku had a special friend. Only because that special friend was not a girl." He looked down and stared into space for a moment.

So... Was that the reason why Hidan did not dare to tell Zabuza he was gay?

"I told him he was overreacting. That he was just mad that Haku had kept it from him." What Hidan was actually saying was that Zabuza felt betrayed. Was that even possible for someone as cold as him? "He did not listen, of course. He said he hated homosexuals and that they weren't human, but he had never claimed anything like that until he found out his brother was gay. Ever since his parents split up, he started pushing all the people away that betrayed him. He would never verify that, but I'm sure that's how he works."

Zabuza was even more complex than I thought. At least if Hidan's theory was right. Maybe it was not such a mystery why Hidan, Zabuza and the others had ganged up together. Everyone had their own ghosts to fight.

"So... What now?" I was not sure if I should ask. But it seemed like Hidan really needed to talk to someone. He had lost his best friend and almost lost his boyfriend in the process. He had to feel very lonely. Perhaps he felt just as lonely as I imagined Zabuza. What a pitiful life. Did Zabuza even have anyone left?

Hidan shrugged. "Life goes on," he said and smiled, but it was far from being genuine.

A week after, Kakuzu, Hidan and I were making everything ready for the big game that was going to play that night. I still was not very much into American football, but I did not really mind watching it anymore and I could easily tell that Hidan enjoyed it when we wanted to watch it together with him.

The door bell rung and Kakuzu went out to get it while Hidan and I kept discussing who was going to win that night. I always rooted for the opposite team of him just to make things more exciting. I did not know any of the teams that well anyway.

"Uhm..." Kakuzu cleared his throat and Hidan and I turned to look in his direction. My eyes widened. "We have a guest."

The uninvited walked over by the couch and sat down next to Hidan and me who was taken aback.

"Scoot over already," the deep voice growled in its usual way.

I looked at Kakuzu who slowly made his way back to his seat in the arm chair. He shrugged when I questioned him with a look.

Hidan had never looked more surprised.

"Here," the man said and held out a beer from the six-pack he had brought. Hidan took it with a hand that was clearly on the verge of shaking. But as soon as he opened it, it was taken away from him again. "Not you, you idiot. Like doc over there is ever gonna let you drink in that state. Pass it." The beer was given to the flabbergasted albino once again, but this time he passed it to Kakuzu who did not dare to do anything else than drink it even though he rarely drank beer and when he did, it had to be organic.

He actually addressed Kakuzu. That had to be the first time he had ever recognized him as an existing person. And what he said sounded so caring. Well, in its own twisted way it did.

None of us knew what to say. That person was the last one we had expected to show up.

During half time, the tall man sat back against the backrest and took the last sip of his beer before speaking. "I visited Haku yesterday. That's one shitty apartment that idiot has gotten himself. Know any good real estate agents?" He looked around and both Kakuzu and I shook our heads. Hidan looked like he could not believe what he had just heard. Honestly, I could not either. It was one surprise after another.

"I might know a few. How's he doing?" Hidan answered.

"He's still got that crappy job. I don't know how he can take living such a lousy life. It doesn't seem to bother him at all. "

"You don't say. But as long as he's happy with it, that's fine. Right, Zabuza?" Hidan picked up his glass of water.

"Maybe," he snorted as usually.

Hidan could not help but smirk when sipping of his water. I had to strain myself so I would not copy him.

**oOoOoOoOoOoOo**

**Hurray! Finally did another chapter. Hope it's satisfying :)**


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter 31**

A pure fist of heat hit me right in the face as I stepped inside the bus. The driver looked at me impatiently as I struggled to get the money out of my wallet, which did not contain much to begin with. But that was not very unusual.

I was on my way to the hospital in Nagoya to deliver some papers to Kakuzu that he had forgotten at Hidan's place. It bothered me quite a lot. Since when had I become his gofer? He was not the one providing a roof over my head. That was his boyfriend. It was a matter of principles because in reality, I had nothing better to do. But I still thought he should have come get it himself or made Hidan bring it. Lucky as I was, Hidan had an excuse ready so he would not have to do it, of course, and then I was stuck with the task. It was not even a good excuse. He was just going to hang out with Zabuza.

The bus driver handed me my ticket and I began walking further down the bus to find myself an empty seat. It was rush hour so that task was even more troublesome.

When my eyes fell on a seat with only a hand on it, I asked, "Excuse me, may I sit here?" but as my eyes traveled up the arm and reached the person's face, I realized it was too late to go find another seat.

"Sure." He looked at me for a second before directing his gaze towards the window.

I hesitated. Maybe he would not mind if I just pretended like I had not asked. But I figured it would only be even more awkward if I turned around and tried to find a new seat, so I forced my unwilling body down.

The bus drove on as soon as the last passenger had gotten on and the silver haired man glanced at me shortly, sending me a forced smile. I could only wonder if his mask was hiding a mouth turned upside down. After hiding the lower part of his face for so many years, he had to be an expert at smiling using only his eyes. I had spent countless hours in front of the mirror, practicing doing just that. But I could not smile with my eyes without my lips turning up as well. Maybe it did not matter how much you practiced. It could just be that it was impossible to give a genuine smile without using your mouth.

I looked at Kakashi in an attempt to figure out what kind of game he was playing. Whatever it was, he was not going to win. I could be just as ignorant.

"Didn't expect to meet you here."

He looked at me. "Neither did I."

I absolutely hated it when he acted so cool. "So... Where're you going?" It would seem like social suicide to most people that I was actually trying to start a conversation with Kakashi, but remember that I was not the one who started out with acting like nothing had ever happened. Besides, the thought of sitting next to him for an unknown period of time without saying anything at all just made my mouth move on its own. The last thing I wanted was that kind of silence.

"Nagoya. And you?"

Great. So I would have to sit on the bus with him for over an hour. "Same. What business do you have there?"

"Going to the hospital for a check up. What about you?"

"I'm headed there as well. I'm delivering something for Kakuzu." It felt like a one way conversation. So pointless.

"Looks like I'm stuck with you for quite a while, huh?"

That caught my attention. The way he used that phrase. It was... uncommon? Did you not usually use it to "apologize" for imposing on someone. But... He reversed it. Now I was the one taking up his time. It could not be a coincidence he had said that. Yet why did he still sit there smiling?

I smiled back. "Well, avoiding people have never been your weakness. It's as simple as taking a different route."

For a second he stared at me very intensely. Then his face went right into being as soft as jelly. He definitely got what I was getting at. "Sometimes it just isn't as simple as that. Not if the other is persistent enough." There was not even the slightest trace of a sneer in his voice. "What is it you're delivering anyway?"

"Kakuzu forgot some file or something at home that he needs today at the hospital. The bastard practically forced me to get it for him and still he wouldn't even tell me what it was about."

"Well, people are allowed to have a private life and secrets, don't you think?" There was that stare again. "Whatever is in that envelope is probably for no one else but him to see. You should know better than anyone that some things should be left unseen or unsaid, am I right?" And he went for the kill.

"There may be some truth to that."

Afterward, I really did not know what to say. It seemed more than anything that he wanted to avoid speaking to me. There was a small chance that I had just misunderstood everything he had said by interpreting them as hints. But I doubted it and admitted defeat.

The bus rolled on. It did not make as loud a racket as the local buses that only drove around the village did. Probably because the government spent more money on them when they had longer routes and especially when it were buses that had to drive around in the big city. They could not afford some old wreck to break down in the middle of peak hours.

The fat woman beside me got a hold of her son that was running around the bus, disturbing the peace most people sat in. She got him onto her lap while saying something to the young girl beside her. The woman could not drown out the loud music from the girl's headphones though. At least she did not react.

There was an old couple sitting in front of me. I figured they were tourists by the way they had to describe every little detail about the landscape around us.

"No, I'm on my way now... Of course not!... I've been sitting in this bus for two hours already so what did you expect?! I'm coming over and that's-"

"Could you not speak on the phone right now? It's embarrassing. People are looking at us."

"So what? This is important."

I stopped listening to the fighting business man and who I assumed to be his wife that both sat behind me. Instead, I took a look around the bus again. Everyone was so different. Everyone had their own reasons to be on the bus. That was what I hated most about public transportation. The stories. I hated knowing that I would never find out for what purpose every single person was on the bus. It was fun enough to observe and guess, but only for a while. Eventually, I always wanted to know exactly what their stories were and how they were going to end. It interested me.

A teenage boy and girl sat a few seats ahead of me on the opposite side. There seemed to be a lot of those around these days.

The girl lifted her head from the boy's shoulder and before she knew it, he had stolen a kiss from her. She looked around embarrassingly, but after he told her something, she settled with looking at him with a pinkish color heating up her round cheeks.

"Excuse me?"

I immediately looked down beside me.

"Do you have a pencil I can borrow? I want to draw my mommy a picture."

"Excuse my son... What did I just say to you? Sit down and be quiet. Don't bother the other passengers."

I had not even had time to look up at the fat woman before she started scolding her kid. I guess it did not matter that much anyway since I did not have a pencil or pen or anything like that on me.

"Here."

I looked at Kakashi.

"He can have it."

He handed me a pen and I gave him a slightly confused look before passing it on to the kid's mother. At first she did not want it, but I bet she was happy that she took it in the end because the kid did not say another word for the rest of the ride.

Kakashi watched the kid that was sitting on his mother's lap now quietly drawing.

I could not stop myself. "That was nice of you," I said.

"Well, the mother looked like she could use a break, don't you think?" He lowered his voice so the mother would not hear.

"Yeah... a little." I smiled at him and was surprised that he smiled back. This time it did not seem so fake.

"You're heading home right after you deliver those papers?" he asked, turning his body towards me in his seat.

"Well, Kakuzu only convinced me to bring them to him because it would give me a chance to search for work in Nagoya."

"Really? So, you're thinking about moving or what?"

"I'm not exactly in any position to move. "

He looked at me apologetically.

"Other than that, there's not any work left for me in the village. I've been everywhere," I continued resignedly. He nodded.

"At least you can drive to town with Kakuzu the days he have to work too."

"Are you kidding me? I would much rather take the bus every single day than do that."

We both laughed and it suddenly felt like the tension between us began to loosen up a bit. It was nice having a casual conversation with Kakashi again. It had been quite a while.

I stood up when we were near our destination. Kakashi was right behind me.

"I thought Kakuzu had already declared you healthy," I said as we walked towards the hospital.

"Me too, but he wanted to check if my body is back up to 100 per cent."

"You think you're gonna pass his little "test"?"

"Sure, I haven't felt better in a long time. Can't see why I wouldn't be fully recovered yet."

"Well, I did read the disease could still have some effect after several months."

"I guess it's okay to be cautious."

Kakuzu was in the middle of checking another patient when we arrived. But it did not take long before he joined us.

I handed him the envelope.

"Thanks. Hope it wasn't too much trouble for you." Kakuzu smiled as if he wanted to apologize.

"No, it wasn't troublesome at all."

"You know, when people hide their mouth, it means they're hiding something. Either they're embarrassed or they're lying about something." The tan doctor winked at me, the smile never leaving his face. I had not even noticed my hand was fumbling around near my mouth.

Kakashi looked down at his feet.

"Are you ready, Kakashi?"

He looked up again and nodded.

"See you at home, Iruka. Tell Hidan I love him."

"You know I don't deliver those kind of messages."

"Just testing." He sent me a smile before walking off with Kakashi. The silver haired did not say goodbye.

Nagoya city was a lot more lively than the boring old village. It had street- musicians, entertainers and traders, bums, people of all ages, happy couples, fighting mates, Asians, tourists, unemployed, a hard working middle class, a carefree top dog and the list goes on. In the city, people did not care what color skin you had, or if you did not know who your real mother was, or if you did not speak Japanese and used cutlery instead of chopsticks. People minded their own business. And they were generally more open minded than the citizens of the village. There was room for everyone.

Maybe even someone like me would be able to fit in there.

I went into a sushi shop and asked if they needed any help. Unfortunately, the old man who ran it told me he would not be able to pay for any help since it was such a small shop. Then I went into a supermarket even though I did not really want to ask for a job in a place like that. At least I would be able to prove that I had some experience, but they had just hired someone and was not looking for anyone new in the near future so I could check that off my list.

Nobody was looking to hire anyone. The only place I did not go into and ask for a job was this night club. A gay bar to be exact. I just could not picture the scenario where someone asked me where I worked and I replied a gay bar. But then again, I did not have any family honor I needed to maintain.

Eventually, I called it a day and went back to the bus station. That was where I met Kakashi for the second time that day.

"You again," he saidwith a wide smile that was visible under his mask.

"I know, two times in one day. What are the odds?"

He chuckled, "Seems like too much of a coincidence. You think Kakuzu was planning this all along?"

"He's that type of man so you never know." I knew he was just kidding, but for some reason it actually seemed logical. Kakuzu hated the fact that Kakashi and I did not talk. And he had the power to gather us. He could arrange it so we would both be taking the same bus and be bound to met at the hospital. But it was too tacky. Yet I would not put it past the doctor to do something like that. I was sure that I was putting too much into it. Nonetheless, I was not going to find out the truth ever anyway so it did not really matter that much.

"How come you're still here?" I asked and he leaned against the bus stop sign.

"Oh, I just wanted to get Anko something for the Koizora festival now that I'm here anyway."

"Is it already time for that? Well, what did you get her?"

"Nothing. I could not find anything interesting." He shrugged and took out a pack of cigarettes. "You want one?"

My eyes were glued to the pack for a few seconds. "... No, I quit."

"Smart. I never thought of you as a smoker anyway."

"You didn't?"

"Nope. Not at all."

I felt kind of stupid and busted. But as long as he did not find out he was the reason why I tried acting tough and cool, it was going to be alright. I would rather die a slow and painful death than have to see the face he would make when realizing it. Would he think of me as a freak or maybe find it cute?

"So," I started, "Are you planning on giving her fuck tickets?"

He gave me an amused look, "Sometimes you really surprise me, Iruka. You have a dirty mind. It's kinda creepy actually." He shook his head with a lighthearted laughter as cigarette smoke surrounded his face.

"I guess I could always just buy her a ring."

My ears perked and my head shot up.

A ring? Was he implying that he was thinking about marrying her? Oh no, I was losing to her. Anko! That woman had zero life experience and she would never be able to relate to Kakashi's history. She was uninteresting. Why would he pick her over me. Was it maybe just to get rid of me? Would he really go to such drastic measures to make me back down? I mean... Marriage?!

I felt a nudge on my shoulder. "Relax, I'm only joking." He was smiling again.

"Of course you were."

"Haha, I love watching you freak out like that."

Behind the playful laughter, I heard a man speaking his mind. It could just be me, but it really sounded like he was genuine. He had spoken of me in the same sentence where he used the word love. It made my stomach turn in a painful way and it felt like my heart tried to clog my throat.

"That's our bus. Are you coming, Iruka?"

I nodded, not being able to speak.

Kakashi threw away his cigarette and his hand fell down along his side. I imagined how it would feel like to hold it. His hand. Would it still be warm on a cold December night? Could I lean against him as we were taken home by the bus? Would he kiss me goodbye or maybe invite me to his place once we got off the bus?

Those were the things I imagined while sitting next to him. Watching him follow the passing trees and houses through the window seat I had let him have.

Kami, if he had known about the boner I had to hide for half of the trip, I would have killed myself.

A few days later, I returned home from Nagoya yet again without having any luck finding a job. It was so depressing. Especially because I ran in to a lot of people I knew when I had to walk around town all the time, begging for a job. And when those people asked what I was currently doing, the most correct answer would be, "You see, I'm sort of a maid at the moment. See the collar? Yeah, just follow the chain from it back to Hidan." He basically owned my ass. Not that he ever toke advantage of it, but it sure would be nice to at least be able to make my own decisions without having to consider Hidan every time. I could not randomly throw a party - well, not that I had anyone to invite anyway - because I was living in Hidan's house. Okay, I suppose he would let me if I asked, but it's the essence of having to ask for permission that bothered me. I felt like a child. I felt so incompetent. The first thing I would do when luck would finally strike me with a glorious job - or just a job that pays money monthly - I would find my own place again.

I picked up the news paper that lay in the kitchen and skimmed it as I walked in the direction of my room.

Then something happened that made me stop in my tracks. A scream. It came from upstairs.

I stood still for a moment, just listening. Maybe it had been my imagination.

"Had enough yet, you filthy animal?!" It sounded a lot like Kakuzu. But how could it be? He rarely used such language.

"Forgive me. Please, stop hitting me!"

There was no doubt about it. That second voice belonged to Hidan's. What the hell was going on? Was Kakuzu seriously beating up Hidan? Why?!

A piercing scream made me stop questioning and instead take action. Something was going on that was not supposed to. That was for sure. No matter what Hidan had done to make Kakuzu hit him like that, I could not just stand by and listen. I had to do something.

Soon, I was sprinting up the stairs, running down to Hidan's room and flinging the door open.

And then I realized I had just made the biggest mistake of my life.

There they were, in the middle of some role play on the bed, naked. Well, partly. Except for all the gear they were wearing.

Hidan was strapped to the bed. He had some questionable red marks and scars on his chest and stomach. Those marks were definitely fresh.

Kakuzu was standing with one leg on each side of the helpless millionaire. He was wearing a look far more guilty, far more surprised and far more embarrassed than a kid who had been caught stealing cookies right out of the jar. Hidan did not look to pleased either, but his blush was no match against Kakuzu's fire red cheeks.

The doctor's grip loosened around his weapon and a line of blood trickled down Hidan's chest from one of the marks.

I, of course, had to exit with the worst thinkable phrase, "Sorry. Just checking."

Kakuzu did not speak to me for a long while after that. He could not even stand being in the same room as me.

Hidan was more open about it. Not that I actually wanted him to tell me about their rather odd sex life. I had gotten more than enough details from those few seconds than was good for me. I would never even dream of burdening you with them.

Never in my wildest dreams would I have been able to imagine Kakuzu being into BDSM. Furthermore, who would have thought he wanted to be the one in control?

My "landlord" had not seen it coming either, but he did not mind playing along once in a while. He loved how cheerful and caring Kakuzu got after being allowed to come out with all his frustrations on someone. It was not really Hidan's thing. That was why he did not mind being the submissive part either. He would never feel comfortable hurting his boyfriend.

I found it strange that Hidan did not express that he got any kind of pleasure out of it, considering the self harming group he had once been a part of. Maybe it just brought back bad memories. In that case, I could not help but admire the albino a little. He would go through something like that solely to make his partner happy. That is something. But I also understood why Kakuzu could not look me in the eyes. Sweet, innocent Kakuzu was the side we all knew and probably the only side of him he ever wanted us to see.

Oh well, it was a somehow fun and rather unfortunate incident, but Kakuzu would get over it eventually. People always do if they really want to.

One of the following days everyone gathered together at our place. For the first time ever, I got to see Itachi's girlfriend, Mei. She had long, red hair with a set of pretty green eyes. And she was a teacher or something like that. I could not help but think she was a tad out of Itachi's league. Or maybe I only saw his not so attractive sides. Or maybe Mei did not mind. One thing was for sure, though; I was glad they did not bring that devil, Sasuke, with them. Apparently, the Uchihas' parents were on one of their rare visits and so they promised to take care of Sasuke and Itachi's child that evening. Pretty funny how Itachi had to ask his parents to take care of their own child. But no wonder they left Sasuke with Itachi. I would go insane too if I had to be around that kid for very long. In all honesty, I felt bad for Itachi... And Sasuke. It was almost like their parents had abandoned them. It was a good thing they had Mei then. She seemed like a very likeable person from the moment she stepped inside the room.

Everyone was dressed in their festive kimonos. Well, I was not, but I obviously was not going. Koizora, the festival that celebrated lovers and the affection they shared. I shared no such thing with anyone. At this time a year, I always felt a tiny bit more alone than I did on any other day.

"Sake?" Kakuzu asked and I snapped out of it.

"No thanks."

He poured me a drink anyway and everyone raised their cups.

"To love!" Anko shouted happily and gulped down her drink.

"What a sappy thing to toast to. You're such a romantic." Hidan drank his sake while receiving a discreet glare from Kakuzu.

"I don't think it's sappy at all. After all, isn't it the Koizora festival we're going to?" Kakuzu smiled at Anko who blew him a kiss.

"That' why you're my favorite," she said, but leaned closer into her real favorite who happened to be mine too.

"So, is this the year you'll finally get down on one knee?" Kakashi asked, looking at Itachi.

The black haired guy shrugged his shoulders, but did not say anything. I was told that they always asked him that same question every year.

We drank a couple more cups of sake before they started getting up.

"Are we ready to go?" Hidan asked.

"Almost, but Iruka isn't dressed yet."

I was rather surprised when Anko suddenly stated that. No one had seemed to notice until then, but now they were all staring at me.

"I'm staying home." The staring did not stop.

"What?! How come?" the dark haired woman exclaimed. I was starting to feel a little uncomfortable.

"I just don't think you should go to that kind of festival without a date." I had not exactly prepared what to say in a situation like this. I thought it was a good excuse, but the rest of the bunch did not think so. They began bugging me and told me to get dressed anyway.

"You can bring Mei as your date. I don't mind," Itachi said and the couple smiled at me. I found it weird that he offered me his girlfriend, but they did appear as an weird couple from the very beginning. She did not seem to mind either. I was not used to couples that were not clingy. Not when I lived with Mr. and Mr. Clingy.

"No, it's fine. I don't see why it's so important that I go anyway. Zabuza is not here either."

"He has an actual excuse. Work." Hidan reminded me, though everyone knew Zabuza purposely made sure he had to work on Koizora night. But no one actually checked if he was working.

"Come on, just go change," Kakashi said suddenly. He did not sound annoyed.

I looked at everyone for a second. "I don't even have a kimono. You're all gonna be late if you don't go now."

"I figured as much. That's why I brought an extra. I'll go get it," Kakuzu said excitedly and ran up to his and Hidan's room before I could stop him.

They all smiled at me, but it faded away when I said, "I'm not going."

"Don't be like tha-"

Anko cut off Hidan. "If he really doesn't wanna go, you shouldn't force him."

I noticed she had taken Kakashi's hand. It was like she wanted me to stay at home. Was that really it? I still did not know if Kakashi had told her about what had happened between us. My confession and all. Maybe he did not even have to. Maybe she could feel it.

But if Kakashi had told her, then who else knew? I did not think she was one to gossip, Kakashi neither. Hidan knew something, I was sure. Not any details, but more than enough for my liking. Kakuzu had to know as much as Hidan. Itachi and Mei did not necessarily know anything. And Zabuza. I did not think he wanted to know and so he did not ask or try and find out anything. He was ignorant on purpose when it came to that.

If that was the case, was she trying to distance me from Kakashi? She was probably doing some kind of victory dance inside of her head at that moment. She was happy I did not tag along.

I did not stop staring at her until Kakuzu stood in front, blocking my vision and holding out the kimono in front of me.

I took it.

The festival was beautiful - and that was and understatement. I had only watched it from a distance, no one ever wanted to go with me back then. Well, not that that had changed, I was a third wheel, just walking along with the couples I knew.

I wanted to be grateful to them for dragging me along, but expressing gratitude was not my thing. It felt strange being the only one without a date, but unlike what I expected, no one seemed to notice that I was on my own. I even received a smile once in a while from various strangers. Most were probably outsiders and did not know about the rumors, but to me, it still counted.

Hidan wanted to go play games and try and win something for Kakuzu. I waited patiently for the tan one to call Hidan childish and stupid, but he never did. He only followed him happily. Maybe this festival really did bring the love out in people.

Anko tucked Kakashi's hand and pointed at the finest restaurant. That bitch. She was totally trying to empty Kakashi's wallet. Could not she just settle with something less? Was not it enough that he had agreed to come to the festival with her? I guess some people were just like that. When you give them a finger, they take the entire arm.

It turned out she was not trying to convince him to go in there. She was just pointing at Itachi and Mei that were shown to a table. How they had gotten one, I had no idea. I was not even sure if you slipped the waiter some extra cash that they would make room for one. Could connections be the answer? You did not just get into that restaurant. Not on the Koizora festival. And those two came along with us and we did not exactly show up early. Itachi had had to pull some strings and I definitely needed to ask him later just what strings he had played with.

"I can't wait for the fireworks," Anko squealed excitedly and linked her arm with Kakashi's.

"I heard they were going to be even more impressive this year," I told her and tried not to sound as if I had never experienced them close up myself.

"Me too. They should be extra special from the park," Kakashi added.

I raised an eyebrow. "But people never go there. I thought they said the sky was clearest on Koizora lane."

"They do, but from the right spot in the park, it should be better. When there's no other people around, it's just you and your date."

"We should go there then, Kaka-chan!"

"Let's wait and see. I haven't watched the fireworks from the street before so I wanna see what all the fuss is about."

"Why haven't you seen it before?" The words just kind of slipped out. I did not mean to ask that. It was rude. What if he had not watched it for the same reasons as me. _Kami, Iruka, you moron!_

"The festival is only once a year and I haven't lived in the village for very long. So I haven't had many chances. I never told you that?" They both looked at me and I felt guilty for asking.

"I suppose you have."

We walked down Koizora lane. There was a lot more people in the village than I thought. Unless most were tourists, but I did not think that was the case because I recognized a lot.

Kakashi and Anko were walking a few steps in front of me. They were talking and laughing, making me feel really bad about myself. I should not be there with them. I bet they wished I would just go home and stay there for the rest of the night. Kakashi looked so happy and so did Anko. I was not sure if she really was in love with him or if it was just an act. I supposed she could have done better if she was only after money. It was not like he owned millions or anything. It could just be that she found him mysterious. But then would she leave him if he stopped wearing his mask? I knew I would not. He had a very attractive face. It was not like he was the only one in the world with a couple of flaws. Besides, was not it the imperfections that made every person special? You know, beautiful in their own way. Even if I would stay by his side, it would probably never be more than a fantasy. He had made it pretty clear that he did not want that kind of relationship with me. But I could not lose hope. Not even when I was walking right behind him, watching him send loving gazes to his big bosomy girlfriend.

"Are you okay with eating here?" Anko turned around and looked at me.

"Uhm, sure." I had always wanted to try that restaurant Mei and Itachi were at, but even if I got in, I would not be able to pay the bill anyway. So the place we were at could be just as good as any other.

"Cool. I'm meeting a friend here. Wait till you see her, Iruka, she's such a cutie."

"Really?" I said completely uninterested while looking at some bypassing people.

"She should be here any minute now. Will you two go get us a table for four?"

"Of course." Kakashi squeezed Anko's hand and sent her a smile before walking into the restaurant, me being right behind him.

"I didn't know someone was gonna join us," I said, while what I actually wanted to ask was that I did not know Anko had any friends. But I stopped myself just in time.

"Sorry, I forgot to tell you. I've met her once. She seems really nice."

"You don't say."

They were making an awful big deal out of pointing out how sweet this girl was. I could not care less and at least Kakashi should know that. Apparently, he did not mind reminding me there was other fish in the sea. Or rather fish of the opposite gender. It was damn annoying.

We got a table and sat down with a cup of sake while we waited for the latecomers.

The waiter asked us twice to leave if we were not going to order before the two girls finally showed up.

I was... shocked... to put it lightly.

"H-hey," said the girl with waistlong, black hair.

"Iruka, this is Hinata-chan. Hinata-chan, this is Iruka," Anko introduced. "And you two already know each other." She looked from Kakashi to the girl beside her.

"Nice to meet you." She bowed, her nervous features being hidden behind the curtain of hair.

I was not sure if that girl had forgotten about me or if she just pretended like she did not know me. At least it did not seem like Anko was aware of our previous encounter. But I guess nearly getting raped was not something girls loved to brag about. I had not talked about it either so I did not even know why I expected that she had. Maybe because all girls were such chatternaggers.

"Take a seat so we can order before that waiter tries to kick us out again," Kakashi chuckled and I nodded when his eyes reached mine.

"Ha, he probably just did not want a fag couple taking up all the space."

Everyone besides Anko put on a strange grimace and looked down. I figured she just had not thought that sentence through before throwing it at us, but it was very inappropriate. No one knew what to say. I felt targeted., she knew the rumors. Why would she say something like that in my presence?

I glanced at Kakashi. The small part of his cheeks that you could see was slightly pink. Unlike Hinata whose face was just plain red. She sure seemed like the careful and easily embarrassed type. What the hell was a girl like that doing with Anko?

"I'm gonna go get the waiter," Anko said when her tongue had finally untied.

"Great," the three of us said in unison. Could it be more awkward?

The conversation did not really get any further than that until our plates were filled. Anko was obviously the one breaking the ice.

"You know what, Iruka, Hinata actually teaches at the school you went to."

I looked up at the black haired girl. "Really? So, what do you teach?" I tried my best to appear interested, but it was hard when I knew she supported the place in the world I hated the most.

"Oh... Well... Right now, I-I'm mostly teaching the the youngest kids so it's ju-just the basics."

"Come one, don't be so modest." Anko pushed her friendly with her shoulder. "She teaches both Japanese, music and social studies."

"That's really impressive," I answered, sounding no where near impressed.

"Y-you think?" The girl blushed and looked the other way. She sure was a shy one.

A moment passed before a question came to my mind. "Why did you choose to work at that school?"

She looked at me like she had not expected me to talk. "Well... I-I didn't have much of a choice. They just happened to be missing a teacher."

"Hmm."

It seemed like she wanted more of a reaction from me, but I honestly did not know what to say. I felt sorry for her to be stuck in a shithole like that just because nothing else was available. She was even overqualified for that job. I would never be anything but not qualified. I had no certificate to prove that I was smart enough to get better jobs than I had already had.

"Did..."

My eyes landed back on her. Was she actually being the one to carry on the conversation? She only seemed like the one that would talk if she was forced to it.

"Did you like go-going to school there?"

I stared at her for a second. Then looked away. "Not particularly."

"How come?"

My gaze dropped to my plate of sushi. I was silent with no clue to what I should respond.

"Man, I hate nostalgia. Shouldn't you eat your fish while it's still fresh?" Kakashi stuffed a Ebi into his mouth before smiling at us. Even though he looked goofy, the only thing I felt like doing right at that very moment was lean to the side and kiss him. He spared me for answering that awful question. He knew I did not like talking about my childhood. He was so... considerate. If Anko had not been there, I probably would have kissed him. I would not even care that we were in public.

"So, how do you two know each other? You never told me." Kakashi asked.

"Hinata and I went to the same private school. The one that lies outside the village."

"Private school. Now that's fancy. I didn't even know you had rich parents."

Sometimes I wondered just how much he actually knew about Anko.

"It's because they're not. They used all their money to send me to that school. They don't like public schools. Hinata is the spoiled brat," she laughed.

"I wouldn't call me spoiled," the black haired girl said innocently with a dissatisfied look on her face.

"I'm only kidding. If you had been one of those snobbish, high class bitches, I would have never hung out with you in the first place."

"I see."

Silence fell upon our table again and we settled with listening to the peppy village. I was happy that there was some background noise because I would have gone insane if I had to listen to myself and the others chewing, sinking and slurping.

Unfortunately, when someone spoke again, it was someone who wanted to speak to me.

"Wha-what do you do, Iruka-san? For a living."

"Me?"

The girl nodded.

"Not much."

"Uh... What do you mean?"

Why was she so interested anyway? "I'm unemployed."

"Oh." She regretted asking. It was so obvious.

"Hey, Kakashi-san." Everyone looked to the right. "And Iruka-san. Nice to see you here." It was Tenzou and he had a woman companion. A woman that looked strangely familiar.

"Hey boss," Kakashi greeted. I had not used that name with Tenzou for so long that it nearly made me want to go back and beg him for a job.

"Good evening, Hyuuga-san." The blonde woman with the biggest tits I had ever seen looked at Hinata and gave a small bow.

"Tsunade-sama," she said back and bowed her head.

That name. That face. It could not be. Not by any chance. Was it really her? No. She did not look like she had aged a day since then. It simply could not be my old principle, Lady Tsunade?! It sounded like her. It looked like her. It was the right name. But... she could not possible look that young and hot at her age!

And what the hell was Tenzou doing with her? He was at least a few years younger than her. Not that I could not imagine Tsunade as a cougar. But Tenzou would never date someone like that, would he?

"Sorry for interrupting your dates. We just wanted to say hello," Tenzou said and both him and Tsunade bowed again.

Before I could tell them that I was not actually on a date, they left. I guess it kind of looked like a date, but still, I did not want them to get any funny ideas.

It was nice hearing Tenzou's voice again. He was the one person that I really missed from my old life. Sometimes I wondered if I would have been better off staying at the supermarket for the rest of my life, not taking any chances or trying to make a real life for myself. Everything had become too complicated after I was fired. Somehow it seemed like it was just yesterday I sat behind the counter, only dreaming about ever talking to Kakashi. In reality, it was already a long time ago.

We finished eating and Anko started nagging Kakashi for her present. He gave in after a few minutes and handed her an envelope. She opened it quickly with ease. It always took me years to open envelopes because I did not want to rip it open in fear of ruining the content.

"A weekend stay at a hotel! Aw, Kakashi you naughty boy!" she shouted and the pale girl and I lowered our heads in shame. Why did she always have to be so loud?

"I thought you needed a little vacation after all those rehearsal hours." Kakashi smiled with his eyes. He had already put the full mask back on – luckily, because that other mask with the hole in it made him look so foolish.

"That's so sweet of you. I'm having a blast at the theater, but sometimes it's hard being around those people all the time. I'll look forward to a weekend where it'll be just us two."

Kakashi just chuckled.

Anko's present was a secret that he would have to wait to get till later. I had an idea of what it could be and it was just so cheesy.

"Here's your present."

I looked at the girl opposite me in surprise.

"What?"

She held out a wrapped box in front of me. "Your present," she repeated.

"Yeah, I heard you the first time, but why are you giving me a present?"

Kakashi and Anko had gotten awfully quiet and I felt a lump start to form in my throat.

"Be-because... It's wha-what you do?" She looked at Anko confusedly.

And then I realized what was going on. Why was this happening to me? Why the hell would they do something like that?!

I gave the blameworthy people a look, then got up from my chair and placed the amount of money I had eaten for on the table before walking out of the restaurant without a word. I heard someone getting up behind me, but I did not want to look back.

"Iruka!" Kakashi was trying to catch up to me. "Iruka, wait!"

I sped up my pace a little, but he grabbed onto my shoulder in no time and forced me to look at him.

"What are you doing?" he asked, clinging to the pathetic small chance that I had not noticed what they were trying to do.

We stepped further into a side street so we would not make a scene.

"How could you set me up like that?!" I asked angrily and glared at him.

"I'm sorry, Iruka. We just thought it wouldn't hurt you to go on a date."

"I never said I wanted a date. And I would never have let you set me up with someone if you had actually asked me. It's embarrassing!"

"Calm down, we only tried to help you."

"I don't need your help." I could not look at him. "And... why would you try and set me up with her when you know..." I paused and glanced at him as he looked away from me.

"Iruka... please, don't bring that up again."

"Why not? Are you embarrassed? Then how couldn't you figure out this was gonna make me mad? It was so fucking inconsiderate. And you make me look even more like a fool when tricking me like that. I bet Anko was the one suggesting it. Am I right? You told her everything." I was aware that I sounded like a hysterical bitch, but I was just so frustrated. How could he do that when he knew he was the one I liked. What a fine way to call me a freak.

Suddenly, he got my attention by grabbing my kimono and pulling me closer.

"I didn't tell anyone... Okay? I'm not gonna. I suggest you do the same," he whispered through his teeth.

I looked at him for a moment, then wiggled out of his grip. What the hell was his problem?

I snorted and turned around. "After this, that was the most humiliating thing of my life. So trust me. I'm the last person to tell anyone." And then I walked off. Kakashi did not follow, only asked me quietly not to go.

I wandered around for half an hour or so without any apparent wish to go anywhere specific. My mind was rushing.

Love did not seem to be something Kami wanted me to experience and it was constantly rubbed in my face that I was apparently the only person on the planet who did not have a special someone that loved me back. Even Tenzou seemed to have found someone and he was not the dating type. He was too focused on running his business.

Me. I was not too busy for anything, but there was still no luck for me in that matter.

When I reached the park for the third time, I took note that you could hear the music from the festival. I was the only one in the area. I had not passed many when walking around. Either people went to the festival or they stayed indoors. Obviously, I should have done the latter.

The sky was clear, just as it should be on this exact evening. Now that I was out, I might as well watch the fireworks from a distance yet another year. Kakashi had said it was supposed to be beautiful from the park.

I found myself a good spot and decided to lay down and wait for the clock to strike midnight.

It was nice outside. Warm, but not too humid. The cold breeze that blew once in a while kept my body from becoming too hot. Slowly, my eyes closed and I got lost in thoughts. It was easy when you lay on soft grass a dry summer night.

I wondered.

I wondered if Hidan was going to kick me out if he and Kakuzu got tired of never being together alone.

I wondered what Zabuza was doing. What kinds of things did he do when he was alone?

I wondered if there was anyone in a spaceship at the time. Did they miss their family? Maybe only people without family went to space. I heard the moon was far away.

I wondered why you felt ticklish when grass caressed you. What did it mean to be ticklish anyway? Why did the body feel weird when being touched lightly? It could not have something to do with the erogenous zones.

I wondered why people cared about how they looked like and how others looked like. Why was it more important to dress to look good than to dress for the occasion? Why bother? Underneath, we were all the same. Even though we had different thinking patterns, there still was something called psychology. You could learn to understand the human mind, which only proved we were less complicated than most thought. On the other hand, no one would ever be able to understand someone completely. Even if you read someone's mind, you would not understand them all the way through. Everyone had their own ways of understanding things, their own experiences to put into perspective. One could only tell someone half of what they actually felt and thought because somehow, they were not even aware of those other feelings and thoughts and did not really understand them that well themselves. That was my theory.

I wondered if people turned gay or if they were born gay. Most gay people claimed the last mentioned as the correct answer. But I think my biology teacher said something about gay people actually having a error in their system. But if you told a gay person that, they would probably freak out. And why is that? Just because they have an error it does not mean they are much different from anybody else. Most people have errors.

I wondered if Kakashi was planning on getting married. Would Anko be the one? Or were they just together until something better came along?

Would I ever leave the village?

I must have been half asleep because when someone said, "Excuse me," I was not sure if I was back at the supermarket, serving a customer, or just sleeping in the park.

My eyes opened and I sat up just to realize I was still the Iruka with short hair that was alone yet again on Koizora night.

"Uhm... I..."

I turned to look behind me with a jerk. There was someone. It was that girl again.

"I'm... I'm sorry to bo-bother you." She looked very strained and nervous, fidgeting with her fingers. I just looked at her. "I'm sorry for what ha-happened tonight. If I had known that you weren't aware tha-"

"It's okay," I said. "I shouldn't have acted like I did. It obviously wasn't your fault."

Her cheeks went red and she looked down at her feet, bowing slightly. "I still want to apologize."

"Me too."

The atmosphere was kind of awkward, but it was not too uncomfortable.

"He-ere's your present," she stuttered and held the same wrapped box out in front of me with her two small hands.

"You don't have to give me anything." It was a sweet gesture, but I really did not see any reason for a gift exchange. Besides, I did not have anything I could give her.

"It's a tha-thank you present... For when you saved me."

"It's not necessary and I don't have anything for you."

"Please... accept my gift." She was very determined. I actually knew what it was like being in her shoes. I had given her a straight out rejection. Just like Kakashi had given me. You feel helpless and alone. I really did not want to take her present, but I could not bare to see her begging me like that. She was only trying to make herself feel good and to make us even. There was not a reason why I should deny her that pleasure.

I took the box and asked without words if I should wrap it up. She encouraged me with a small nod.

It was a leather necklace with a silver pendant that was shaped as a dolphin. I was a little too old to wear jewelry that matched my name, but I still could not keep myself from smiling. I was not sure why, it just brought back that bubbly feeling I had whenever I was with Minato.

"Do you li-like it?"

I looked up at her and nodded. "I love it. Thank you."

She blushed harder and smiled happily. Like I had just taken some kind of burden off her shoulders.

"I... I should head home." She turned around to leave as if she was in a rush.

Before I was able to think one single thought, I said, "You should be able to get a better view of the firework from here... Well, supposedly."

She turned back and gave me a questioning look. "Oh... I... didn't know." It looked like she was in two minds about whether or not to keep walking.

"Wanna join me? There's not long till midnight. Would be a waste to go home now."

"Uhm..." She looked in the direction of Koizora lane, then her house and then back at me. "O-okay."

I tapped the spot beside me and she sat down.

"You look good tonight," I said for no other reason than to make her feel comfortable. I was her date, after all, so was not I the one who was supposed to tell her how pretty she was? I was more of a gentleman than I thought. Probably because I had spent countless hours listening to Kakuzu's lectures on what it meant to have manners. He sure had his hands full with Hidan.

She did not dare to look me in the eyes. "Tha-thank y-you."

"No problem."

We sat for some time just listening to each other breathing and the distant noise from the merry lane. So far, she was actually good company. She did not talk too much, she was careful not to say anything wrong, and just not annoying in general like Anko was or like Hidan and Kakuzu could be sometimes.

"How come you agreed to go on a date with someone you didn't know?" Being quiet was nice, but even I liked chit chatting every now and then.

"I... didn't have a date. And I wanted to go. But actually... I was not sure if I wanted to go with a stranger until Anko showed me your picture. I just wanted a chance to thank you again."

"No need to thank me. I was in the area anyway."

"But most people would never have gotten involved. What you did was very admirable."

Now my face flushed. I did not know what to say. Kakashi had said something similar about me before. But he and she were the only ones that had ever called my actions anything near admirable. I was not used to compliments at all yet.

There was a sudden whizzing sound and then an explosion.

"Look," Hinata said and gazed up at the sky that filled with beautiful strings of color.

I did not answer right away, but instead took in the sight above us. "It really is beautiful from the park."

First it was a white and yellow firework. Then a purple. Then green. Then one with lots of colors all mixed together and a lot more followed.

"Iruka-san?"

My attention turned to Hinata. Her pale, blue eyes were still intensely watching the fleeting art. Like she did not dare to look anywhere else.

"You look good too."

I smiled to myself and looked back up.

When I first saw the promotion poster for the Koizora festival months back, I did not think I would be going just like the previous years. But yet I went without a date and without a real desire to go or any expectations to what would happen. It turned out alright, I guess. Now I had a date and we were watching the colorful sky together. It was more than I had hoped to get out of it. The festival had not been a complete waste of time after all. Maybe I would even consider hanging out with this girl after this. She was a nice change compared to my so-called friends.

"Hey, guys. What are you doing down here?"

We both looked behind us just to see the entire gang walking down towards us.

"Same as you, I guess."

Hidan spoke again, "We came to look at the fireworks. It was too crowdy up there."

"We're actually on our way home. My parents won't be in town for long so better be present while they're still here," Itachi said.

His arm was around Mei who cheerfully added, "It was nice meeting you." And soon after they took off.

"So," Hidan started. "What were you two doing down here all by yourself?" He was wearing that perverted grin.

"It's none of your business." I knew I made myself sound guilty, but Hidan did not deserve an answer when he was being nosy. Not that I was usually any better at that point.

"If you wanna be alone, we'll leave." He teased.

"Do whatever you want."

"You're sure we're not interrupting something?" Hidan kept on going.

Hinata started looking a little uncomfortable. Kakuzu and Anko were just smiling like they wished something was really going on.

Kakashi did not say or do much and when I looked at him, he looked away and adjusted his mask. I got this strange feeling that something was wrong, but I could not tell why he was acting all weird so suddenly.

Everyone settled down beside us and as they watched the fireworks, something else suddenly struck me as odd.

"Where's Asuma?" I asked.

"That party pooper didn't wanna come. He thought it was stupid when he didn't have a girlfriend," the albino answered.

Is that so. I remember another person who did not want to come for the exact same reason, which made it sound like everyone was in on this - let's set Iruka up on a blind date - thing. I felt deceived and ridiculous. How much more pathetic can it get? Even my own friends did not trust that I would be able to find myself a girlfriend if I wanted to. But I guess it did not matter. They had no idea how complicated my situation was.

**oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo**

**Whaaaat uuup dooogs :O!**

**This chapter has been under development for so long and I apologize sincerely for that! But we just got out of the busiest month of the year and I almost just finished the biggest assignment you get during the three years of the Gymnasium so I really have been super busy. Still, I'm sorry. But as I wrote in my last A/N, I'm not abandoning this so don't worry! I hope the length make up for my delay a little. I wrote the entire story on my phone so I had no idea of how long it was. I thought it was around 4000 words or something, but I sure as hell got myself a surprise when I checked the word count when finally transferring it to my computer. NEARLY 10.000 WORDS! I can't believe I wrote that much on my phone D: And Kami, did I have troubles with getting the chapter from my phone to my computer? Yes, I think I did. It was done Sunday, but I couldn't get it over till today and now I used all my spare time to check this through. So I hope you'll appreciate that 'cause I had hoped to watch some Fullmetal Alchemist. Now I'm just going to sleep -_-'**

**And thank you so much to Kurosuisen for helping me out with chapter! I don't know when it would have been done if she hadn't!  
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**Anyway, I'm happy that it's finally done. Now I'm wondering if anybody is even still reading it since next month the story will "turn a year." This is the first story that I've put this much effort into and I can't believe I haven't got tired of writing it.**

**A huge apology to Good Boy-Chan who has not gotten her story yet! I will try to finish it soon now that school shouldn't be so busy anymore and now that Anything Else? has been updated again. I'll try my hardest, promise! I really do feel bad for making you wait this long!  
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**If you wanna check out my deviantArt account - that only contains drawings and NOT stories, my account name is LoveToTheCucumber there as well. I have some art for Anything Else? there if you're interested ^^ Also, one awesome person that I have mentioned before made some art for Anything Else? and it made me super happy! So if anyone is doing or have done the same, don't hesitate to contact me and send me a link. I would love to see your art :D!  
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**See ya' soon again, hopefully :D!**


	32. Alternative Chapter 28 Deleted Scene

_***A/N* Hello there, boys and girls (mostly girls, I assume xD? )  
>I know, it's been a hell of a long time since I last updated and I'm so sorry about that, but uni is taking up all of my time. I probably shouldn't even be doing this now... <strong>_

_**Anyway, since I still haven't got the time to continue the story, I thought I would treat the readers who are actually still following this. This alternative chapter is actually my first try at the first part of chapter 28. It also contains a deleted scene – Kakashi's childhood – that didn't make it to the actual story. I rewrote the chapter simply 'cause it didn't turn out the way I wanted it to and I didn't add Kakashi's childhood story to the actual chapter 28 'cause it ruined the flow and just didn't fit the story.**_

_**This part is set just after Iruka has told Kakashi about his childhood (in Iruka's room in Hidan's house.)**_

_**I hope this can keep you busy for a little while till I get to write the next chapter :)**_

**Chapter 28**

_**Alternative + Deleted Scene**_

Kakashi kept on staring at me for a long time, a seal of shock preventing him from uttering anything.

My eyes drifted away from his form. I could not blame him for staying silent. If the roles had been reversed, I would have acted the same way, probably. What could he possibly have to say anyway? I feel sorry for you? It is your own fault your in this mess? - something like that, perhaps? Maybe not. I did not know.

"I would've never guessed." My gaze slowly returned to him, a quizzical look climbing my face. "I always knew there was something strange about you, but that was... quite the eye-opener." I did not particularly appreciate him calling me strange, but having been called worse things than that for my entire life, 'strange' appeared almost as a positive adjective to me.

"I'm sorry if it wasn't the answer you were looking for," I sighed and rubbed the scar on my nose with one finger.

"What else could I be looking for?" he asked. I just shrugged and stove off his adhering eyes.

"I don't know." A blush found its way to my cheeks.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I'm just embarrassed."

"But what are you embarrassed about?"

"My past. You're the first person I've ever told everything there is to tell. You probably know more than Tenzou even though he was actually there part of the way."

Kakashi leaned forward and rested both his arms right above his knees. He wanted me to look at him. I could only follow his will. "Your past is nothing to be embarrassed about. You were placed in an unfair situation from the very beginning and the fact that you managed to overcome every single obstacle you were met by along the way only makes your success that more admirable."

"What success?" I asked dead serious. There was nothing successful about me. Not one single thing that I could ever imagine anyone admiring me for. "I have nothing to be proud of."

"Is that so?" Kakashi did not look very pleased anymore. "So you consider being alive and well a failure?" he laughed sarcastically, "you must be the first person to ever think like that. Aren't you happy at all that you proved everyone wrong? You're still here and you have a normal life. Isn't that what you wanted? Isn't that what those kids told you you would never have?"

"I just don't feel like I've accomplished anything. I'm already 26 and I feel like an old loser. I have nothing left. I'm so... pathetic. "

"Then what am I to you?" He was glaring at me. A dissatisfied look on his face. Or was it the face of someone who was hurt? "I'm almost 30. I don't have any kids, I only just got myself a girlfriend who doesn't exactly seem like the kind of person you would settle down with. I go to parties every weekend, I have fucked up friends who enjoy fighting, drinking and taking drugs. I act like a freaking 14-year-old. I even managed to get myself fired from my previous job, which didn't even require that much engagement, brains or ambitions and now I'm working in a lousy supermarket in a small miserable village. Worst of all, I'm still hiding behind this mask even after all these years. Now tell me, if you're pathetic, then what am I?"

My lips were slightly parted out of sheer astonishment. Had Kakashi just said those things? He rarely spoke with much emotion, but this was a passionate speech. He really meant what he said. But Kakashi was not pathetic. Those things did not make him a loser.

Kakashi's hand reached for his mask. I could not help but widen my eyes. What was he doing? Was he really...

He slid a finger underneath the fabric and pulled off the mask. It then felt like time had stopped.

I stared at him, mouth wide open and a dumbstruck expression on my face. After all that time, suddenly he decided to reveal his face to me.

"This is what's truly pathetic. A man at my age who thinks he can hide himself and his past simply by putting on a mask," he said quietly without looking at me. "Unlike you, I made myself the victim. I let myself be teased. That confident and apathetic man you all see in me is the actual mask. The real me is an insecure coward. Nothing like the person I want to be. Nothing like the kind of person you managed to become, Iruka. So... Let me ask again. If you think of yourself as pathetic, then what am I?" Our eyes met and I realized something was really nagging him. Those eyes. I had seen those eyes before... I had seen them once in the mirror.

_The silver haired boy left the table along with all the other children. It was his classmate, Tayuya's, birthday and for once, the pale boy known as Kakashi had not been the only one left without an invitation. Unfortunately, right after he had received the invitation, he overhead two of his classmates talking. They were not putting any kind of effort into subduing their words. They were well aware of Kakashi's presence._

"_Why did you invite _him_?" Temari asked Tayuya._

"_My mother told me I had to. She's gonna call his mom to make sure he got the invitation. It's so unfair." That was what he had overheard and funnily enough, he did not really feel like going to the party after all._

_His mother had been the one to convince him. Even though he had tried to hide the invitation and pick up the phone before he, she ended up finding out when Tayuya's mother called her cell. She knew he was not very liked in his class, but she wanted him to take every chance he got to try and make some friends. He only wished she would stay out of it._

_At the party, the girls decided that everyone was going to play spin the bottle. Kakashi was not fond of the idea, but unlike the other boys, he did not complain. He knew he had no saying in those matters, but since no one was likely to even recognize his presence, he figured nothing could go wrong. But when Tayuya and Temari, the two most popular girls in his class, started "fighting" during the game, Kakashi started getting a bad feeling. He had always been very observant. You had to when being in a position like him._

_Tayuya and Temari were both madly in love with the prettiest boy at school. His name was Kidoumaru and he had to be the most ignorant asshole ever. At least in Kakashi's opinion. It seemed like the guy had never noticed the affection the two girls held to him. Not even during the game did he get why they were suddenly fighting._

_But Kakashi knew._

_It all began when the bottle hit Tayuya after Temari had spun it. Girls like them were almost too easy for Kakashi to read and he soon figured that the two had already agreed that if one of them hit the other, they would have to ask her to kiss Kidoumaru. Girls that age always made stupid plans like that._

_But when Temari had to decide what Tayuya's task should be, she did not stick to the plan since the last thing she wanted was for her rival to kiss Kidoumaru in front of her. So she asked her to go get her a soda instead._

_Tayuya was furious after that and when she finally got lucky, and the bottle later pointed at Temari, she had already planned out her sweet revenge._

"_You have to kiss Kakashi!" Tayuya said, an evil grin spreading over her face._

"_Wha-what!?" Temari exclaimed as everyone around her - excluding Kakashi and herself – started laughing._

_Kakashi blushed dementedly while still trying to look calm. He was getting nervous. Temari would be his first kiss and he was not very comfortable with that. He had no idea of how to kissed and all of a sudden he had to perform in front of his entire class. What if he did something wrong?_

"_Go on. You know you can't quit now," Tayuya reminded her._

"_But... Can't I kiss someone else?" It was not like Kakashi had not expected her to say something like that, but it still hurt and it was even more embarrassing when everyone was there to listen to Temari practically pleading for her life just so she would not have to kiss him. None of the girls protested when they had to kiss Jiroubou and he was not exactly one of the girls' favorites due to his weight problem._

"_Stop complaining! You have to kiss Kakashi!"_

_Kakashi could not blame Temari for not wanting to kiss him. It would probably be even more uncomfortable and embarrassing for her if they kissed than it would for him. At least she had some social status to lose._

"_Y-you don't ha-have to." he stammered. All Kakashi was trying to do was help Temari._

"_Shut up, pizza face!" Sakon snickered along with all the other boys. Kakashi flinched at the boy's sharp response and decided to keep quiet for the rest of the time. He knew damn well it was not a good idea to speak in his classmates' presence._

"_I'm not doing it! We swore that we wouldn't tell each other to kiss him!" Temari burst out, hurting Kakashi more with her words than she could even begin to imagine._

_The blonde rose to her feet to leave, but Tayuya copied and grabbed her, telling the other girls to come help her and the boys to go fetch Kakashi. Temari screamed, kicked and wrenched, but with every single girl in the class holding her, she could not do much to escape. _

_Kidoumaru twisted both Kakashi's arms behind his back and pressed upward so the silver haired boy would rise to his feet in pain._

_Everyone was laughing at them as they forced the two of them closer to each other. Temari was very loud in her protest, while Kakashi kept silent when trying to get away from Kidoumaru._

"_Stop it, I don't want to do it!" the blonde cried as she looked at Kakashi with detestation._

"_Here we go," Kidoumaru snickered and pressed Kakashi's head together with Temari's so their lips met. _

_Temari sank her teeth into Kakashi's lower lip almost as soon as they had clashed. He let out a painful shriek and everyone finally took a step back, allowing Temari to run downstairs, crying. _

_Kakashi put a finger to his lip. He was bleeding. _

_The others did not say anything to him, only laughed at their own viciousness. _

_The silver haired boy considered his options for a while until he finally decided on going to the downstairs toilet and get himself some paper before he would stain Tayuya's mother's carpet._

_He got the paper and went into the kitchen where he appeared to be alone. Well, besides from the Golden Retriever that stood not far from him._

_Kakashi pressed the paper to his lip as he went over to pet the dog. "Hey," he said softly and reached his free hand out towards it, though he soon had to retreat because of the sudden snarl he received from the blond haired dog._

"_What are you doing? Don't touch him!" a voice from behind Kakashi said. He turned around and followed Tayuya with his eyes as she went over beside him to pet the dog._

"_I-I'm sorry. I just wanted to pe-pet it."_

"_He doesn't like strangers," she said crisply._

_Kakashi brought his hand up to scratch the back of his neck, but accidentally grazed Tayuya in the process. She screamed._

"_I'm so-sorry!" He took a step back in astonishment and apologized over and over again, but she did not care. Even the dog started barking at him._

"_What's going on?" Kidoumaru asked as he came into the kitchen with the rest of the boys._

"_Ew, ew, ew, he touched me!" It was not the first time something like that had happened. Kakashi was used to it by then. For some reason, the girls in his class had gotten the idea that his acne was contagious and that they would catch it just by touching him. He felt so filthy around other people._

"_Is that true, Hatake? Did you touch her?" Kidoumaru asked as he walked up to them._

"_I-I didn't me-mean t-to."_

"_Hey, don't be cheeky. Come, guys, I think Hatake needs to be put in his place again." Kidoumaru grabbed Kakashi and forced him outside, all the other boys helping the manipulative alpha male._

"_Heika, I'm s-sorry!" Kakashi exclaimed submissively and tried to get away, but was unsuccessful. Kidoumaru smirked at the mention of his "nickname." He had tried to make Kakashi call him that ever since pre-school, but he only seemed to use it when he wanted to get out of being taught a lesson. It did not matter to Kidoumaru. Well, maybe he would go a little easier on him now that Kakashi had made it clear to everyone who was the boss._

_Kakashi was thrown into a puddle on his stomach and Kidoumaru sat on top of him, leaning closer and smearing out mud in the pale boy's face. He was choking on it, but the tanned one did not care._

"_I'll help you cover that disgusting face of yours!" Kidoumaru laughed barbarously and shoved Kakashi's face down the mud pool._

"_Yeah, you can't walk around like that! You make people want to puke!"_

"_Hey, what's going on out here?" Tayuya's mother asked as she poked her head outside, discovering that all the boys were practically drowning Kakashi._

_She got the boys away from him and gave them a good scolding before returning to the silver haired boy whom she had placed in the living room. She told him she was sorry, even though Kakashi could not figure out why she was apologizing. It was not her fault. She should not be sorry._

_Tayuya's mother called Kakashi's and told her to come get him after having discussed it with the silver haired boy first. He wanted to go home badly, but on the other hand, if he left, it would only prove to the others that they had won. He was a wimp. An easy target._

_That was about the only reason why he did not want to go home from the temple of humiliation and apparently, Tayuya's mother did not consider this, only advised him to go home since she could see he was not comfortable there. _

_At home, Kakashi went to the bathroom to get washed up. There was mud everywhere. In his face, on his clothes, hands, nails, everywhere._

_He started scratching his face. At first, he only scratched with little force, but the pressure increased with every second that past and soon he stood looking at himself, mud, tears and blood running down his damaged skin. He hated his appearance more than anything in the world. Not even his mother could convince him that he was just an ordinarily looking child. All he ever saw when looking at his reflection was something more repelling than the ugliest monster in any scary movie he had ever seen._

_Gray eyes stared back at him until he rejected them, walking out of the bathroom. His mother looked terrified when she first laid her eyes on him after that. He knew very well his classmates would only laugh even more at him when seeing his scratched face, but at moments like those, he could not hold himself back. He would tear off his skin if he could._

_For many years, he tried to hide his face behind scarfs and surgical masks, but his mother always saw through him and told him to take it off since it only made him look like a street thug. She loved him no matter what and wanted him to see that he was perfect just the way he was, but Kakashi did not listen._

_At the age of 16, he got tired of all the teasing and started lifting weights. It was common knowledge that you did not bully someone who could easily punch your teeth out._

_When he turned 18, he moved away from his mother. He bought his first neoprene mask soon after. Now that his mother was not there to tell him what he could and could not do anymore, he was determined to change his life for the better and he did not see any way around the mask._

_He pulled it up and walked out of his apartment, feeling like a changed man._

_Asuma was his first friend. They met in the gym where they both worked at the time. Together with him, he found more people who gladly offered him their friendship. Kakashi could not believe the upheaval and grew confident behind the fabric that covered most of his face._

_He wore the mask from then on out, though he knew the impurities were long gone. But the scars remained as a constant reminder. Even if he was grown up now and people had come to an age where they could accept him as he was, he never removed it. He was afraid that everything he had worked for would fall to the floor the second he revealed himself. The nicknames and insults from his childhood would always sit waiting in the back of his mind whenever he as much as thought of pealing off his mask._

_Kakashi's skin was not the only thing that would be scarred forever._

The pale man next to me looked down at his lap, a melancholic expression adorning his face. He had seemed so lost in his thoughts, only giving me small hints to what his past had been like, but I understood. I knew what he had gone through.

And the mask was not just a feature. He really was hiding something behind it.

I examined his face for a short while, noticing the pimple scars that were only visible from under his eyes and down. If he had not pointed them out, I would have probably never thought about it. Was he really that self-conscious? He had hid behind a mask for so many years because of some shallow scars no one would even give a thought to begin with. Sure, they were not invisible, but still, they were the least distracting thing about him

He made as if to put the mask back on and without thinking, I stopped him. Now that he had finally opened up to me as I had done to him, I was not going to let all our work fall to the ground.

Our eyes met and he looked at me suprisedly. My hand did not retrieve from its place on top of his.

"Kakashi, I..." My lips and tongue were moving on their own. I was sure of how I felt now and I wanted Kakashi to know. There was no certainty to how he would react, but somehow a confession at that point just felt like the right thing to do, even though something was telling me not to at the same time. I could not wait any longer. "I think I..."

I scooted a little closer – 'a little' being the key word in that sentence. I was not sure if he was ready for this or even if I was. But how could a man do something like that to another man without it ever meaning anything. Sure, he had the excuse of being drunk, but should I believe something like that? I had been drunk too, but was still very aware of what had happened.

Kakashi cocked his head and let his hand fall to his lap, my hand following his. A knot went wild in my stomach and I had to take a deep breath to calm myself. Situations like that one were the worst, but I would have to tell him at some point, why not now when I was somewhat sure and when we had declared our full trust to each other. I had waited long enough already.

I bit my lower lip nervously. I was never going to say it, was I? How could he be so calm and patient?

"I... I like you better without the mask." I was getting ready to choke myself, but had the nerve to continue even though a beating was awaiting me once I was left to myself again. "Don't you think it's time you ditched it?"

For the first time, I saw Kakashi smiling with something else than just his eyes. If something was contagious about him, it was not his former skin disease, but his smile. I would even go as far as saying it was addicting. Those narrow lips looked much better when curling upward.

"Thanks, Iruka. I needed that," he said and laid a hand on my shoulder. "I'm glad we had this talk. Thank you for telling me all that."

My eyes glanced at the hand on my shoulder. He was touching me and it was making me tense even if the touch was feather like.

"I hope you see now why I look up to you so much. You even managed to cheer me up. Hehe, and I was supposed to be the one cheering you up. You're a much better person than I am. I'm glad to have you as a friend." He patted my shoulder and raised it to pull it away, but I stopped him in his action once again, receiving a confused look when I took his hand down from my shoulder and kept holding onto it.

I sank loudly and felt how my heart started beating faster. This was no longer about making friends with him. I wanted... more.

Carefully, I tugged his arm to get him closer and leaned forward as slowly as possible. I had to strain myself so I would not just jump into his arms. The suspense was killing me, but there was no way he was going to like me being so straight forward.

Kakashi did not seem to understand what I was trying to do so I figured I had to do something more evident. I slid one leg up onto the bed so I could turn my entire body towards him and I began to push him down. His body was unwilling, but I kept on pushing till he lay on the bed, bemused.

He was looking at me with wide eyes and his mouth slightly open. I breathed heavily while staring into his eyes. They were terrifying. They frightened me in a way I had never been frightened before.

I let one finger travel over his cheek, watching as he got ready to say something. "Iruka?" he whispered and grabbed my wrist to stop my hand from traveling any further down. His breathing was fast.

If it was not clear then what it was I wanted, he had to be slow-witted. I was being as obvious as I felt I was allowed to be.

When he did not do anything, I figured he did not mind if I continued.

What had I done?


End file.
